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Sometimes I wonder how I can go from being in such a good place with God … feeling peaceful, loving and patient.. but then something happens that sends me into an orbit of aggravation!!
It happened just the other day…
Things were going well. I’d had a lovely afternoon working from home. Alone. Life was peachy.
But then school got out and kids came home. Within 15 minutes of arrival, one of my boys did something and said something that wasn’t so peachy. Then he did NOT do something I’d asked him to do and let’s just say… I lost all my peace and patience right there in the middle of my kitchen.
I was not happy.at.all. And I let my precious boy know it in a not-so-nice kind of way.
Then I felt GUILTY and like the WORST MOM on the planet.
For a few minutes I was pretty sure that’s exactly how God wanted me to feel ~ so I wouldn’t act so ugly the next time.
But finally, after I’d almost convinced myself that I was the worst mom and had no business in ministry, I remembered something a pastor said about the difference between conviction and condemnation. He explained it like this:
Condemnation sweeps across our thoughts with generalized statements such as, You’re such a failure, You’re so hypocritical, or You can never be counted on. That is the accuser. His tone is condemning, questioning, and confusing. His accusations lead to guilt and shame.
But the Holy Spirit’s conviction will be specific. He will reveal a sinful action or attitude and instruct us on what we need to do to right the wrong: whether it’s restoring a broken relationship or returning something that isn’t ours. He’ll give us steps we need to take to change our behavior or attitude.
• Instead of You’re such a failure as a [wife, mom, daughter, friend], the Spirit might say, You were really critical the way you talked to _________ (your husband, child, parent, etc). You need to say you are sorry and ask for forgiveness. Then tell them something that will build them up instead of tearing them down.
• Instead of You’re so hypocritical, the Spirit might say, You judge others for gossiping, but you are doing the same thing when you talk about your neighbor at work. Tomorrow at lunch break, apologize for what you said and share a few things that are positive about her.
• Instead of You can never be counted on, the Spirit might say, You didn’t keep your promise to go see your mom today. Call her to apologize and maybe set up a lunch date for this weekend.
Satan condemns accusingly, to make us feel guilty. God convicts lovingly, to lead our hearts to repentance. {tweet this?}
Jesus’ convictios draws us away from destructive behavior that hinders our relationship with Him and with others. His goal is to bring us out of the darkness of sin and back into the Light, so we can walk with Him in the freedom of forgiveness and the confidence of His love.
The next time we blow it or lose it, let’s ask Jesus to replace our guilt-induced doubt with HIS grace-infused confidence, as we hold onto the promise that His grace is sufficient because His power is made perfect in our weakness.
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So very thankful that His grace is sufficient because His power is made perfect in our weakness. Love reading your work – it always ministers to me. Thanks so much for being real.
Great message and a good way to begin my day. Because of the realization of your wrong, you were absolutely the one to deliver a message. It is very much like having a shared experience with others. You understand because you have been there, done that. Others may be more open to the message when you are where they are, sharing together. thank you for not giving up on your message. God uses us where we are.
I needed this!!! Thank you
I very much needed this today! Thank you for the explanation between conviction and condemnation. I snapped at my husband last night during a conversation about swimming lessons for our daughter. We didn’t see eye to eye and instead of listening when he was making valid points, I snapped and went to bed angry which is wrong. Thankfully His mercies are new each morning! And my sweet husband kissed me goodbye this morning like nothing had happened.
This devotional hit very close to home! God knew it was just what I needed!
Wow! what a real and “easy to relate to” kind of story. Many times before I sing at my church, I think God why did you ask me to do this and am I really qualified to share your message in song to these people? All of the incidents from the recent past come rushing to my mind of how I did not respond with a giving or a compassionate heart…. and that voice in my head says… “See, these are the reasons why you shouldn’t be in front of all these folks you love..you’re not godly enough.” Thank you for sharing that story of your frustration; it reminded me we all have to take each day, each situation and each moment to “renew our mind” with what God says in His Word. Romans 12:2
Thanks for the reminder that we are all a work in progress! It can be easy to hear the words of others and absorb them as final truth. PTL there is grace and that our God is Truth.
Your devotion today made me cry (well, not ‘sob sob’ cry, but tears fell from my eyes just the same.) It is SO amazing how women deal with the same issues in daily living. Your story could have been written by ME, because I have frequent days like yours. You look forward to a particular situation/event, have everything planned down to the minute, just to have total chaos interfere from almost the beginning. (And I KNOW very well that tightening in the stomach…the blood pressure building..plus perspiration starting to come from my forehead…lol) Anyway, the verse you shared today was quite soothing to my heart! The response of your women’s ministry leader was PERFECT. I will never forget it. I’m glad it all worked out, and I thank you for writing devotions/books that relate to so many women just striving to live a godly life in this tough world today. Bless you!
WOW! What a great word. I understand exactly how the enemy can use our emotions against us for self-doubt. How beautiful it is when a child of God can stand before everyone and be totally transparent, like Adam and Eve before the fall. When someone does that, it gives room for the Holy Spirit to move and that is when lives and hearts are truly changed! What a beautiful place to be – almost like back in The Garden with Him, without shame!
Thank you for sharing and your honesty! I needed to hear this today.
Hi. There, reading your email today has inspired me to get moving! It has been very stressful here. My husband got a job transfer and he has been very stressed and taking it out on our family. We need to live in forgiveness and Gods grace everyday and remember we are all human and we all need a savior! God bless you for giving us this message today. I really needed it and I sent it to my husband and friends who need it to. If I win the book I plan to share it with others who need it right now.
Thank you for all you do!
Patty picinich
Yep,just had a fail about 5 min ago, needed this. Thanks for posting!
I am trying so hard to “let go and let God”. I keep letting go but I keep taking back also. I feel like a failure somewhere at some time each day it seems. I let stress come in and I lose my attitude of gratitude at work or with my family. Instead of relying on God to carry me through, I try to take control and usually make a bigger mess of things.
God knew this was exactly what I needed to hear today. Thank you for following his calling and sharing your talents with us!
I loved the explanation between what Satan says vs, what the Holy Spirit says. It’s so easy to believe the words of Satan, but we know that God’s grace and mercy is sufficient for us, regardless of the things we may do wrong!
Today’s devotion is spot-on! When I blow it (every day, it seems), I feel as if I’ll never be perfect in God’s eyes, or mine. I believe that I’ll never get there, that I keep going around the same mountain, struggling with the same thing, never seeing progress or victory. I can be my worst enemy. But then I hear God’s voice inviting me to come to Him in confession and repentance, and He’ll forgive me, help me to overcome this struggle and continue to love me unconditionally! Renee, thank you for this…I sure need to be reminded of God’s grace every day!
Thanks so much for this and for Confident Heart. The LORD has used it to encourage me so that I can encourage others. And He used numbers 21 and 22 to settle me concerning a leadership decision with which I was struggling. Praise His Name.
Thank you for your devotion. It really hit home. Many times I am filled with doubt and that leads to insecurities and feelings of discouragement. I know God loves me just as I am, but sometimes it’s hard to believe that he can love this sinner woman. Your devotion is exactly what I needed to remember how much God loves me and how much he wants me to trust Him, just as I am. Thanks again and God bless you!!!!
Sometimes Satan’s condemnation can be louder than the Spirit’s conviction. It can be hard to squelch his noise so that we can hear what we really need to hear. Sometimes, a lot of times, I need that daily reminder to listen to His still small voice and block out the noise of the deceiver.
Thank you so much for making me feel normal! I am far from perfect but yet Christ still showers myself and family with grace and love! You have reminded me to try and stay on the Christian path! For example I shouldn’t have doubted my husband he made the correct decisions for us regarding how our money was spent. God gave him the direction in were to go.
I wake up every morning to read these wonderful uplifting devotionals. I thank God that He made you the way you are so I could learn from your experiences ! They are just how I feel at times.
Thank you for your devotional today. I serve on staff at a church and work with many wonderful volunteers each week. Sometimes it is hard not to judge and write stories in my head as to why people do some of the things they do. I have to constantly extend grace, but sometimes I don’t extend that same grace to myself. Thanks for sharing your experiences with us .
What a wonderful devotion of encouragement and the difference in hearing God’s word and the enemies.
I would love to add this book to my newly formed bible book club. Two close girlfriends and I started this book club in hopes to hear God’s work and words through fellowship. We’re all young and married and that seems to go hand and hand with comparison and self-doubt at times so I can assure you your lessons would not be lost on us. I’m looking forward to reading your book with my girlfriends if we’re selected!
As always God uses your ministry to speak to me the words I need to hear at just the right time. Gods timg is always perfect!
As a mom of two young kids, I often struggle with my response to them when they have done wrong. I will try so hard to respond to them with patience and speak words of Life over them, but by the late afternoon my patience is gone and I will be snappy towards them when they misbehave. It always makes me feel horrible! I find myself crying at night to my husband about feeling defeated. This devotional really hit home for me. What great motivation to know that God uses our weak moments to teach us so that we can teach others who are struggling with the same issues! Now that’s a great way to defeat the enemy!
This spoke to my heart! At bible study two nights ago, this came up and I confess, I wallowed in my guilt and shame. Thank you for this!
Thank you so much for being the inspiration and having the words I needed this morning! I have so much going on and conflict occurring within my self at this moment, it is challenging and your words are a great source of inspiration and guidance!! Thank you Renee and God Bless!!
This message really spoke to my heart. Thank you for your openness and sharing how God is working in you. It is such an encouragement!
God certainly used you to hit me with that 2×4 this morning. Thank you.
Dearest Renee,
What can I say, you have said it all, I am not perfect myself, then again none of us are. I would love to read your book and dealt deeper into your wisdom that you have been bless with.
Lorraine
Thanks for being open & honest & reminding us about grace.
Trying to be all things to all people is impossible, I feel I fall short and therefore I must be guilty for trying to do this all on my own. I know I can’t. This story is encouraging and forgiving! God is Good all the time!
This is my first time to your sight….
I was raised by a perfectionist, to be a perfectionist. I’m so thankful that God is moving me from
‘perfectionist’ to ‘growing in Christ’. Perfectionism is all-or-nothing, Growth is little-by-little.
Perfectionism is all about the goal, where Growth is all about the journey. I’m a better person since
God has introduced growth to me. I am getting better and better at relying on Christ
and His grace, instead of on myself and my own weak abilities.There is so much freedom there!
Your devotion resonated with me this morning. Satan loves to use my old perfectionistic tendencies
to condemn me, but God is helping my ears hear more of His Spirit these days, and I’m so thankful for
that. I believe your devotional book would be another blessing to me from God. Thank you for what you
do. It made a difference to me today, and I know it makes a difference for many others.
I struggle with getting out of the condemnation and focusing instead on the conviction from the Holy Spirit and fixing my actions. Often times, I will believe Satan’s lies and continue to punish myself. Thank you for being so honest and open with your own struggles, as they are truly helping me to identify and work through mine! I would love to win this book but will definitely purchase a copy if I don’t win 🙂
Thank you so much for sharing your stories. For me, learning of other people’s struggles helps me in my walk. Definitely words I needed to hear. God know who needs them and always sends them at the time we need them.
Ladies really need one another despite our proud independent ways. Sharing honestly, praying heartfelt, and seeking forgiveness will always mend hearts together for the journey of life.
My mother passed away early in my life and it’s always amazed me how God has placed many wonderful Christian ladies in my path to help lead the Godly way.
I pray often for compassion because I’ll never know of any circumstance where sweet compassion doesn’t make a difference.
Created to Serve.
I really enjoyed this message – as a wife and mom I feel I make many mistakes each day and end up feeling discouraged and guilty. Wonderful reminder that I need to ask God for help and forgiveness throughout my day and he will never let me down.
I feel so lucky to have started my day reading both your Encouragement for Today and Blog post. It was perfect timing. I lost my patience with my small kiddos yesterday, they had been misbehaving so badly at my doctor appointment, that it was cut short and I was asked to leave the building! I was mortified, embarrassed and angry. I said something to them that I wish I hadn’t – and have been feeling like the Worst Mom in the World. I feel so guilty. Your post made me feel a lot better and gave me some tools to work through this. Thank you! I’d love to read your book!
This was a much needed devotional for me. I often deal with self condemnation, always very critical of myself and thoses closest to me. Many people have told me I expect perfection from myself and often my children. When I feel as though I have missed the mark I am very quick to condemn myself, on being a good friend, mother, person, daughter, girlfriend, employee, etc.
Thanks
I can identify with your devotion today. I’ve been feeling the same thoughts when dealing with my daughters. Trying to teach them about the love of the Lord, but struggling to live it out daily, when messes and attitudes and fussing toddlers abound. But His grace is there! To pick us all back up and place on the rock Christ Jesus. Thank you for your thoughts today.
I love the explanation of condemnation vs. conviction! It is just what I needed to hear! Thanks for sharing it with us.
Awesome Word this morning and explanation of God’s grace and His loving conviction and not condemnation! I also loved reading others testimonies. It’s so great to see God work.
I cannot put into words, how much your life has spoken to mines in regards to guilt – induced doubt. Of all days, I needed to hear this message. Even as Christians, we never feel good enough to serve GOD, but HE takes our brokeness and does something miraculas in ourselves and others. Thank you Renee, for reminding us that we do not have to perfect to serve GOD. We just have to be a willing vessel, no matter how broken.
Thank you so much for this good word of truth. I find it so easy to go right into the self-pity zone of wallowing when I realize that I’ve sinned. That somehow makes me feel better about my sinfulness. Thank you for this truth that I am set free from guilt and able to walk in the truth of conviction by the Spirit. Amen!
What a great explanation of conviction vs. condemnation! And I find that when things are really happening in the ministry I facilitate, that’s when the Accuser begins to work overtime! Amazing how quickly we accept his condemnation. Thanks for the clarification.
I know your devotionals are for women and I DO get alot from them. But often there are things that can help my son….such as this one about Condemnation and Conviction…..and I will share with him as well! Thanks!
So often I struggle to decipher what’s the Holy Spirit and what’s the enemy speaking to me. Today I got out of your blog that it’s so necessary to really listen to what is being said. You said is it generalities or specifics…which I love! But then I also got to thinking…is it truth or lies? Am I running by what’s said in my head with the word to check it’s accuracy? Does it go against what God teaches me as truth? Thank you so much for sharing your life so honestly!! It was a joy to read this morning. 🙂
Thank you so much for actually sharing from your heart and soul. We all know that God loves us so very much – HE gave his life for us – yet there are moments when we all struggle with something or someone or some assignment and feel so unworthy of what HE has done for us.
Love this book – I have it on my kindle and I try to read it daily! I would love to win a book for my friend who still likes to feel the pages of a book in her hands! Thanks for all you do for God’s glory – you inspire me!
Whoa! Do I ever get the “self-induced doubt” concept…I’m mothering 3 teenagers!!! Somehow I managed to go from a loving and attentive mother and wife to “pathetic” and a “loser” (this is what they say to me) in a span of a few years! It’s crushing!!! And, in our interactions, I often find myself acting or speaking in ways that seem “foreign” to me; so my self -doubt is soaring! But you said two things that really gave me focus: (1) God doesn’t condemn; He uses conviction to show us where we erred. (2) God uses people with great faults for His even greater purposes and good!!! So, today I’m gonna breathe deeply and listen for the Holy Spirit to guide me through the rough patches! Thank You!