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Sometimes I wonder how I can go from being in such a good place with God … feeling peaceful, loving and patient.. but then something happens that sends me into an orbit of aggravation!!
It happened just the other day…
Things were going well. I’d had a lovely afternoon working from home. Alone. Life was peachy.
But then school got out and kids came home. Within 15 minutes of arrival, one of my boys did something and said something that wasn’t so peachy. Then he did NOT do something I’d asked him to do and let’s just say… I lost all my peace and patience right there in the middle of my kitchen.
I was not happy.at.all. And I let my precious boy know it in a not-so-nice kind of way.
Then I felt GUILTY and like the WORST MOM on the planet.
For a few minutes I was pretty sure that’s exactly how God wanted me to feel ~ so I wouldn’t act so ugly the next time.
But finally, after I’d almost convinced myself that I was the worst mom and had no business in ministry, I remembered something a pastor said about the difference between conviction and condemnation. He explained it like this:
Condemnation sweeps across our thoughts with generalized statements such as, You’re such a failure, You’re so hypocritical, or You can never be counted on. That is the accuser. His tone is condemning, questioning, and confusing. His accusations lead to guilt and shame.
But the Holy Spirit’s conviction will be specific. He will reveal a sinful action or attitude and instruct us on what we need to do to right the wrong: whether it’s restoring a broken relationship or returning something that isn’t ours. He’ll give us steps we need to take to change our behavior or attitude.
• Instead of You’re such a failure as a [wife, mom, daughter, friend], the Spirit might say, You were really critical the way you talked to _________ (your husband, child, parent, etc). You need to say you are sorry and ask for forgiveness. Then tell them something that will build them up instead of tearing them down.
• Instead of You’re so hypocritical, the Spirit might say, You judge others for gossiping, but you are doing the same thing when you talk about your neighbor at work. Tomorrow at lunch break, apologize for what you said and share a few things that are positive about her.
• Instead of You can never be counted on, the Spirit might say, You didn’t keep your promise to go see your mom today. Call her to apologize and maybe set up a lunch date for this weekend.
Satan condemns accusingly, to make us feel guilty. God convicts lovingly, to lead our hearts to repentance. {tweet this?}
Jesus’ convictios draws us away from destructive behavior that hinders our relationship with Him and with others. His goal is to bring us out of the darkness of sin and back into the Light, so we can walk with Him in the freedom of forgiveness and the confidence of His love.
The next time we blow it or lose it, let’s ask Jesus to replace our guilt-induced doubt with HIS grace-infused confidence, as we hold onto the promise that His grace is sufficient because His power is made perfect in our weakness.
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I really needed this today. You put into words what I often experience when I too feel guilty about how I sometimes act. I serve on a team of women who lead a Bible study at our church. I also write encouraging devotionals on a blog. Instead of listening to the enemy tell me I am not worthy of doing these things, I will choose to accept the grace and love of my Lord and Savior!
Thanks!
Lisa
Just what I needed today!! Thank you! I would love to have your book! 😉 Have a blessed day everyone!
I was thrilled with the article, No More Guilt-induced Doubt. I have been in church all my life and believe that God is real and the only way to true peace. However, I struggle with fact and feeling. Thanks for the insights in your words.
Please enter me in the free devotional so I can continue to get encouragement.
Oh Renee, I love your timing because I blew it yesterday and I was feeling just like you. I love your book and would love to win your devotional too…
So many times I have let my tongue say things I should not say and hurt someone’s feelings I feel so guilty afterwards and don’t always have the opportunity to say I’m sorry. I struggle with this everyday. I am not a bad person but sometimes I feel I am the most horrible mother, sister, wife, friend and person overall. I know this is not God’s plan for me and fight myself daily to overcome this. I’ve learnt the hard way that the last thing you say to someone will the last thing you say to them. So I am trying to be a better person but the guilt I feel is so overwhelming I just don’t know if I will ever feel peace again. I had someone very close to me pass away and our last words to each other were not pleasant and I cannot apologize and tell them how sorry I am. I struggle daily to make sure the last words I speak to someone are pleasant and encouraging. They may very well be last words you say to them.
Faith is the only thing that keeps me going on more days than I would like to admit. Proverbs 31 emails and books have really fed my hunger for scripture in ways that open new doors for me. Hearing how scripture is used in others’ lives helps me to apply it to my own in ways I had not thought of. Thank you for being willing to share your naked truths to help others. You and the other Proverbs 31 writers are truly angels.
I love this! Thank you for the chance to win!
Your post was very timely for me today, exactly what I needed to hear! Thank you.
I needed this today.
I really like your devotions. it helps to keep me going
If only I knew this at a younger age when I was raising children. I’m still learning and doing much better now but my daughter is 30 now and can’t seem to find forgiveness in her heart (she is not saved) for what I have done in the past. She and our granddaughter have lived with us for 15 months now and she has seen how different I am with Hadley (she is 2 1/2 now) but still won’t forgive me. A devotional reminding me I’m not alone would be very much appreciated.
THIS is what I needed to hear tonight…
“Satan condemns accusingly, to make us feel guilty. God convicts lovingly, to lead our hearts to repentance.”
THANK YOU!!!
Awesome! We are not perfect. Oh when that devil tries to pull you in and u know it… Its like come on u know to do what is right and then we get emotional and blahhhhh. This was so true renee. Love your truth and the truth of god you share.
My friend recommended Proverbs 31, and it is changing my life. I so enjoy reading the daily devotionals, and I find that Lysa Terkeurst and your devotionals really find a way to my heart. Thank You so much!
After reading this, my prayer is that God will help me to stop and think before I speak.
Learning the difference between condemanation and conviction was a real eye opener. It is so easy to fall into the guilt-induced trap the enemy sets but if we know the truth we can replace it with grace-infused confidence! Thanks so much for this!
I am so thankful for God’s mercy and goodness. I have lived many years with guilt and have condemned myself consistently. Your explanation was very meaningful to me and I will repeat it each time I begin to condemn myself from things today and many things in the past. I would love to be entered into your giveaway. I feel I really need to work hard on these issues and I’m sure your giveaway would lead me in the path I need to take.
Thanks.
As much as I try to be the perfect mother, wife, daughter, sister, friend, co-worker, etc. I fail. Instead of constantly being down on myself, I need to remember His grace is sufficient, His forgiveness is granted. Thanks for the reminder.
This is such a wonderful message. It is so easy to listen to the negative and ignore the positive.
Thank you so much for this!
Oh my… my mailbox gets so full, sometimes I don’t take the time to really stop…think and pray about a post that I have read….sometimes I skim over them…if I even have time to open them.
With the events of this week (over 50 people in our church have been saved) a lot of talk has been about doubt, and when I saw the title of the post I was drawn to read it. I appreciate so much your explanation of the difference in condemnation & conviction.
Last night the Lord allowed me to lead 3 people to the Lord….after the first one, I began to pray and thank God for allowing me the opportunity, yet a wave of self-doubt came over me….. and I began to think ” Lord I don’t understand why you would use me in such a way… I am so unworthy of your love. I am a sinner just as they are and, and…… then another came to me and wanted me to talk with them and pray with them. I have beat myself up for feeling like I am not worthy, because He chose me… I am HIS and yet I am struggling so. Satan is the one that is condemning me…. using me against myself. I have wavered back & forth today, between, I am so unworthy to God loves me so much. When I read this…. I thought THANK YOU LORD!!! I know this is not conviction this is condemnation – “There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit. ” Romans 8:1 Oh, yes there is some conviction …. in that I need to remember that I am HIS and I need to walk in the spirit and allow HIM to fight this battle that I seem to be facing…… and realize that He chose me….He gave me an opportunity… He doesn’t need me…. but He uses me if I am obedient! Praise the Lord for leading me here….and thank you Renee for sharing this!!