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Sometimes I wonder how I can go from being in such a good place with God … feeling peaceful, loving and patient.. but then something happens that sends me into an orbit of aggravation!!
It happened just the other day…
Things were going well. I’d had a lovely afternoon working from home. Alone. Life was peachy.
But then school got out and kids came home. Within 15 minutes of arrival, one of my boys did something and said something that wasn’t so peachy. Then he did NOT do something I’d asked him to do and let’s just say… I lost all my peace and patience right there in the middle of my kitchen.
I was not happy.at.all. And I let my precious boy know it in a not-so-nice kind of way.
Then I felt GUILTY and like the WORST MOM on the planet.
For a few minutes I was pretty sure that’s exactly how God wanted me to feel ~ so I wouldn’t act so ugly the next time.
But finally, after I’d almost convinced myself that I was the worst mom and had no business in ministry, I remembered something a pastor said about the difference between conviction and condemnation. He explained it like this:
Condemnation sweeps across our thoughts with generalized statements such as, You’re such a failure, You’re so hypocritical, or You can never be counted on. That is the accuser. His tone is condemning, questioning, and confusing. His accusations lead to guilt and shame.
But the Holy Spirit’s conviction will be specific. He will reveal a sinful action or attitude and instruct us on what we need to do to right the wrong: whether it’s restoring a broken relationship or returning something that isn’t ours. He’ll give us steps we need to take to change our behavior or attitude.
• Instead of You’re such a failure as a [wife, mom, daughter, friend], the Spirit might say, You were really critical the way you talked to _________ (your husband, child, parent, etc). You need to say you are sorry and ask for forgiveness. Then tell them something that will build them up instead of tearing them down.
• Instead of You’re so hypocritical, the Spirit might say, You judge others for gossiping, but you are doing the same thing when you talk about your neighbor at work. Tomorrow at lunch break, apologize for what you said and share a few things that are positive about her.
• Instead of You can never be counted on, the Spirit might say, You didn’t keep your promise to go see your mom today. Call her to apologize and maybe set up a lunch date for this weekend.
Satan condemns accusingly, to make us feel guilty. God convicts lovingly, to lead our hearts to repentance. {tweet this?}
Jesus’ convictios draws us away from destructive behavior that hinders our relationship with Him and with others. His goal is to bring us out of the darkness of sin and back into the Light, so we can walk with Him in the freedom of forgiveness and the confidence of His love.
The next time we blow it or lose it, let’s ask Jesus to replace our guilt-induced doubt with HIS grace-infused confidence, as we hold onto the promise that His grace is sufficient because His power is made perfect in our weakness.
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I really needed this today. You put into words what I often experience when I too feel guilty about how I sometimes act. I serve on a team of women who lead a Bible study at our church. I also write encouraging devotionals on a blog. Instead of listening to the enemy tell me I am not worthy of doing these things, I will choose to accept the grace and love of my Lord and Savior!
Thanks!
Lisa
Just what I needed today!! Thank you! I would love to have your book! 😉 Have a blessed day everyone!
I was thrilled with the article, No More Guilt-induced Doubt. I have been in church all my life and believe that God is real and the only way to true peace. However, I struggle with fact and feeling. Thanks for the insights in your words.
Please enter me in the free devotional so I can continue to get encouragement.
Oh Renee, I love your timing because I blew it yesterday and I was feeling just like you. I love your book and would love to win your devotional too…
So many times I have let my tongue say things I should not say and hurt someone’s feelings I feel so guilty afterwards and don’t always have the opportunity to say I’m sorry. I struggle with this everyday. I am not a bad person but sometimes I feel I am the most horrible mother, sister, wife, friend and person overall. I know this is not God’s plan for me and fight myself daily to overcome this. I’ve learnt the hard way that the last thing you say to someone will the last thing you say to them. So I am trying to be a better person but the guilt I feel is so overwhelming I just don’t know if I will ever feel peace again. I had someone very close to me pass away and our last words to each other were not pleasant and I cannot apologize and tell them how sorry I am. I struggle daily to make sure the last words I speak to someone are pleasant and encouraging. They may very well be last words you say to them.
Faith is the only thing that keeps me going on more days than I would like to admit. Proverbs 31 emails and books have really fed my hunger for scripture in ways that open new doors for me. Hearing how scripture is used in others’ lives helps me to apply it to my own in ways I had not thought of. Thank you for being willing to share your naked truths to help others. You and the other Proverbs 31 writers are truly angels.
I love this! Thank you for the chance to win!
Your post was very timely for me today, exactly what I needed to hear! Thank you.
I needed this today.
I really like your devotions. it helps to keep me going
If only I knew this at a younger age when I was raising children. I’m still learning and doing much better now but my daughter is 30 now and can’t seem to find forgiveness in her heart (she is not saved) for what I have done in the past. She and our granddaughter have lived with us for 15 months now and she has seen how different I am with Hadley (she is 2 1/2 now) but still won’t forgive me. A devotional reminding me I’m not alone would be very much appreciated.
THIS is what I needed to hear tonight…
“Satan condemns accusingly, to make us feel guilty. God convicts lovingly, to lead our hearts to repentance.”
THANK YOU!!!
Awesome! We are not perfect. Oh when that devil tries to pull you in and u know it… Its like come on u know to do what is right and then we get emotional and blahhhhh. This was so true renee. Love your truth and the truth of god you share.
My friend recommended Proverbs 31, and it is changing my life. I so enjoy reading the daily devotionals, and I find that Lysa Terkeurst and your devotionals really find a way to my heart. Thank You so much!
After reading this, my prayer is that God will help me to stop and think before I speak.
Learning the difference between condemanation and conviction was a real eye opener. It is so easy to fall into the guilt-induced trap the enemy sets but if we know the truth we can replace it with grace-infused confidence! Thanks so much for this!
I am so thankful for God’s mercy and goodness. I have lived many years with guilt and have condemned myself consistently. Your explanation was very meaningful to me and I will repeat it each time I begin to condemn myself from things today and many things in the past. I would love to be entered into your giveaway. I feel I really need to work hard on these issues and I’m sure your giveaway would lead me in the path I need to take.
Thanks.
As much as I try to be the perfect mother, wife, daughter, sister, friend, co-worker, etc. I fail. Instead of constantly being down on myself, I need to remember His grace is sufficient, His forgiveness is granted. Thanks for the reminder.
This is such a wonderful message. It is so easy to listen to the negative and ignore the positive.
Thank you so much for this!
Oh my… my mailbox gets so full, sometimes I don’t take the time to really stop…think and pray about a post that I have read….sometimes I skim over them…if I even have time to open them.
With the events of this week (over 50 people in our church have been saved) a lot of talk has been about doubt, and when I saw the title of the post I was drawn to read it. I appreciate so much your explanation of the difference in condemnation & conviction.
Last night the Lord allowed me to lead 3 people to the Lord….after the first one, I began to pray and thank God for allowing me the opportunity, yet a wave of self-doubt came over me….. and I began to think ” Lord I don’t understand why you would use me in such a way… I am so unworthy of your love. I am a sinner just as they are and, and…… then another came to me and wanted me to talk with them and pray with them. I have beat myself up for feeling like I am not worthy, because He chose me… I am HIS and yet I am struggling so. Satan is the one that is condemning me…. using me against myself. I have wavered back & forth today, between, I am so unworthy to God loves me so much. When I read this…. I thought THANK YOU LORD!!! I know this is not conviction this is condemnation – “There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit. ” Romans 8:1 Oh, yes there is some conviction …. in that I need to remember that I am HIS and I need to walk in the spirit and allow HIM to fight this battle that I seem to be facing…… and realize that He chose me….He gave me an opportunity… He doesn’t need me…. but He uses me if I am obedient! Praise the Lord for leading me here….and thank you Renee for sharing this!!
A great reminder. The enemy is a liar, and he will keep using the same old files if we let him. We need to learn his tactics so we can call him on the lies. God does not want us walking around defeated and condemned.
Your book a confidant heart was so inspiring and helped me walk through a really difficult time. I had lost all of my confidence after I found out my husband betrayal our entire marriage of 23 years. I had to make
decisions to stay or leave. I choose to stay committed to my marriage. My husband asked for forgiveness and admitted he was sexually addicted. So we started a long hard journey through Celebrate Recover.
I can now say he has learned to use II Cor 12:9-10 to help to overcome his urges to lust. This is the scripture I clung to in order not to be overcome by the flesh. It is not easy to walk through addiction with anyone. It truly takes forgiveness, grace, and searching yourself for areas where you were into the flesh.
My husband and I both have seen so much flesh, so grateful for the grace to be set free. My journey is to
build my confidence in the Lord not in my husband. Thank you for sharing I am praying God will provide
a way to help me be able to afford this book of devotions.
Satan condemns accusingly, to make us feel guilty. God convicts lovingly, to lead our hearts to repentance.
This leaped out at me, it’s so true. God is amazing and loves us so much. I had just gotten off the phone with our eldest son, who is working away from home and struggling with doubt, and satans condemnation…I called him back and I shared this with him…
Renee I love your book, I’ve mentioned more than once that it is high lighted, written on with many colors, so much information, scriptures, encouragement. I use it as a reference to go back to. I have page 194 copied and hanging on my tack board by my computer (God’s names) I truly love El Sali, God of my strength. Guilt induced doubt can cripple your life, I know. I go back to page 72 “Hurt that robs us of hope”….hurts and a haunting shadow robbed me for so long, but as my walk with Proverbs 31 began/with all you beautiful ladies and my Savior, my life has changed tremendously. Your write in your book “When we let Jesus pour His healing power into our lives, His love flows into our pain and cleanses the wounds from our past.” What a true, true, true statement. I also loved your God says statements, I still go back to them…
I love your book, and I shared this on FB….I must learn how to tweet ;o)
Than You, Blessings Anna
This was perfect timing! I’ve been struggling with this issue lately. I love how you shared that condemnations are general and conviction is specific! This will be very helpful! Thank you!
I know God led me to this today. Really needed the encouragement. Close family and friends struggling with terminal illnesses and the enemy is hard at work. God Bless you for sharing this.
I recently went through a 12 step program for eating disorder. I discovered that being real with other people and letting them know who we really are and that we all need God in our lives is awesome and peaceful way to live. Knowing who we are in Christ and not letting what people think of us matter…it’s what God thinks!
Thank you, for reminding us the we, despite trying to be Christ-like, are all too human in our judgments, assumptions and rash behavior common of busy parents and professionals, yet God forgives and loves us anyway; it is such a relief. I find myself lately praying for favor and blessing, yet at the same time questioning whether or not I live my life in a way that is deserving of the gifts I am asking for! There is so much self doubt within us, is it nice to be reminded that although we may doubt ourselves, God does not doubt us. He loves us and believes in us, and has a plan for us always. Thank you for reminding me today that although my prayers have not been answered, that they are not ignored or disregarded, and God has a plan for me, even if I don’t know it yet or see it coming to fruition.
Just what I needed to read this morning. Now I know I am human! And not alone! Thank you.
I would love this devotional as I love your Book a confident Woman and the devotional would be Awesome to read and have.
These thoughts are ones that I need to hear over and over. I want so very much to make them a part of my self talk. I was bullied as a child and teen and I have so much negative self talk floating around in my head. I’m looking to turn my talk toward God so I can be free to listen to what He has to say!
Thank you so much for this message!! What an amazing explanation between conviction and condemnation. I have struggled living in a guilt condeming world for over 40 years. It is my prayer that God will continue teaching me to from this destruction and focus on the TRUTH of his word.
P.S. Please enter me to win the 60-Day Devotional.
love this today it really encouraged me as my 94 dad is staying with us and I feel at times I can NOT do this and am not very kind to him – thank you for encouraging my heart
As a Christian who is most definitely a work in progress, I very much appreciate the gift of testimony.
For most of my walk with Christ I have held on, with not a firm grasp in God’s word or in fellowship with others.
Thank God for his loving grace and strong grip. He continues to bless me with the opportunity to grow through the honest sharing of others.
At this time in my journey I realize I have a need, desire and responsibility to hold on tightly to my Heavenly
Father. Through any and all self inflicted or man made obstacles along the way, he continues to amaze me. He faithfully leads me back to where the road begins and ends with him.
In being able to read of others experiences in their own walk with Christ and how God’s word blesses them I am truly grateful.
Thanks for explaining about the difference it makes when the Holy Spirit does His work
to guide us in God’s ways.
Thank you SO much for this loving reminder of God’s character. Even though my head knows that God does not condemn us, my heart needs lots of reminders.
His Grace is sufficiant for me. Thanks for your daily devotionals. God has truly worked through you and used you to spread his gospel to others. I am so glad that you listen to his sweet spirit and obey his commands to bless others. May God bless you ten fold.
Great post! I pray for God to hold my tongue and lift those up . His grace is sufficient for all.
His grace i need it daily. Thank you for the post a much needed scripture to carry me through.
I really needed this post today. This is a perfect example of God’s grace and I really needed to hear it.
Thank you.
Thank you for the realization that we are all human…It seems the older I get the less I feel confident ~ I know how to be , I have taught my daughters as they my grand children, but I just let doubt in, feel insecure in my abilities and let others take away my ability to be happy and confidenr… Life is full…good un happy beauty sadness and if we let God in it is full of peace, joy , and a love full of forgiveness…
This is exactly me. So many days I will lose my patience with my son & “blow up”. Immediately feeling guilty and ashamed. Doubting my abilities to be a good mother. I have experienced both the condemnation and conviction. I’m happy to say that more and more I’m hearing Jesus speak to me to immediately go give my son a hug, apologize for the way I reacted and calmly talk to him about what he did to make me angry (which I should have done the first time). Thank you for your words!
I have struggled with guilt for years. After reading all the comments, I realize I’m not alone in this. I found your devotion on condemnation and conviction to be very uplifting. It was just what I needed to hear today. Thank you Renee for sharing your thoughts. I would love to win a copy of your book.
This blog post really spoke to me. I try to control the hypocritical thoughts I give myself and the guilt and condemnation that goes with them. I know I am saved by grace and a new creation that needs to see and feel the Holy Spirit’s conviction when I do or act in a certain way. Love the examples given on how to know the difference between Satan’s condemnation and the Holy Spirit’s teaching conviction.
This really resonated with me. Thank you!
I REALLY needed this devotion today. I was not very “Godly” last week nor this weekend toward my husband and I see areas where I need to be the first to apologize and build him up instead of verbally tearing him down. Thank you for this necessary encouragement.
Thank you for this devotion! I feel guilty most days; mainly just for my thoughts. I do find that now as soon as a bad thought enters my mind I am praying for God to forgive me and get rid of it.
I so need your thoughts today, been feeling down and out, self blame and lack of confidence , energy and conviction. But God has paid the price and through prayer today, I feel better. Just need to remind myself and every one else, that with God all things are possible. alone, well, you are alone
Just what I needed to hear today. Said something hurtful to a friend and I needed to make it right. Afterward, there was no condemnation in Christ because I followed His word and humbled myself to make amends. Thank you for your ministry.
Thank you so much! “Condemnation thoughts verses conviction messages, that’s so good. I only pray that I can remember this important message. So very helpful when put into application.
I’m finally getting in touch with the Holy Spirit in my life…..because….I didn’t always ask Him for help, guidance, assistance, direction, prodding, peace, insight, and knowledge. I didn’t remember to ask…..
I went to Jesus and I prayed to God and I knew about the Spirit, but I didn’t know much about the Spirit…..so I didn’t go to Him. I do now…..what difference to feel His presence in me every day. A completeness…Beautiful.