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Sometimes I wonder how I can go from being in such a good place with God … feeling peaceful, loving and patient.. but then something happens that sends me into an orbit of aggravation!!
It happened just the other day…
Things were going well. I’d had a lovely afternoon working from home. Alone. Life was peachy.
But then school got out and kids came home. Within 15 minutes of arrival, one of my boys did something and said something that wasn’t so peachy. Then he did NOT do something I’d asked him to do and let’s just say… I lost all my peace and patience right there in the middle of my kitchen.
I was not happy.at.all. And I let my precious boy know it in a not-so-nice kind of way.
Then I felt GUILTY and like the WORST MOM on the planet.
For a few minutes I was pretty sure that’s exactly how God wanted me to feel ~ so I wouldn’t act so ugly the next time.
But finally, after I’d almost convinced myself that I was the worst mom and had no business in ministry, I remembered something a pastor said about the difference between conviction and condemnation. He explained it like this:
Condemnation sweeps across our thoughts with generalized statements such as, You’re such a failure, You’re so hypocritical, or You can never be counted on. That is the accuser. His tone is condemning, questioning, and confusing. His accusations lead to guilt and shame.
But the Holy Spirit’s conviction will be specific. He will reveal a sinful action or attitude and instruct us on what we need to do to right the wrong: whether it’s restoring a broken relationship or returning something that isn’t ours. He’ll give us steps we need to take to change our behavior or attitude.
• Instead of You’re such a failure as a [wife, mom, daughter, friend], the Spirit might say, You were really critical the way you talked to _________ (your husband, child, parent, etc). You need to say you are sorry and ask for forgiveness. Then tell them something that will build them up instead of tearing them down.
• Instead of You’re so hypocritical, the Spirit might say, You judge others for gossiping, but you are doing the same thing when you talk about your neighbor at work. Tomorrow at lunch break, apologize for what you said and share a few things that are positive about her.
• Instead of You can never be counted on, the Spirit might say, You didn’t keep your promise to go see your mom today. Call her to apologize and maybe set up a lunch date for this weekend.
Satan condemns accusingly, to make us feel guilty. God convicts lovingly, to lead our hearts to repentance. {tweet this?}
Jesus’ convictios draws us away from destructive behavior that hinders our relationship with Him and with others. His goal is to bring us out of the darkness of sin and back into the Light, so we can walk with Him in the freedom of forgiveness and the confidence of His love.
The next time we blow it or lose it, let’s ask Jesus to replace our guilt-induced doubt with HIS grace-infused confidence, as we hold onto the promise that His grace is sufficient because His power is made perfect in our weakness.
If my P31 devotion or blog post resonated with you today, I hope you’ll ENTER TO WIN a copy of my new Confident Heart Devotional. I truly believe the stories and truths in it will change your life {like they have mine}!
Based on honest struggles we all have with comparison, self-doubt, fear of failing, and the life-changing lessons God’s taught me and ten other women, {whose stories are in the book} you will discover how to change the way you feel by changing the way you think – which will transform the way you live!
Expanding on what readers of my first book LOVED most: “When I say … God says …” statements, I’ve written 60 new devotions and new {WISGS} statements to equip you with a new a thought map and a promise – to live in every day!
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this is what I needed to hear! I have been struggling so much. I have been blessed by your words & looking forward to being able to read your book when I can afford it (hopefully sooner than later). blessings!!!!
I loved your devotional today. It really spoke to me.
Great message as I have felt that same way many times.
So many times we do feel the guilt because of our actions. Why then, is it so difficult to go a apologize and ask for forgiveness. We (I) need to remember to trust God and not rely on Satan’s goals to make us feel guilt and down. As a Grandmother and Great-Grandmother, I feel my granddaughter could greatly benefit from this devotional. Please enter me in your drawing.
Thank you for sharing i wish to be counted in for the competition I need to be one of the winners
Confidence before his throne has been such a theme of my heart lately, something that I desire and pray grows in my life. It is so humbling how God reveals what is truly in our hearts through life’s bumps. We are all cherry until we get bumped in a tender spot and then the not so nice (Christ needing) us comes out. Thank you for your post, so authentic and refreshing to know we are all in this together.
Thank you!!!!!
Boy, as a mom of a 2 & 4 year old I doubt myself multiple times a day. I could really use this book.
Thank you for being so real. The explanation of the difference between condemnation and coviction , thank you. I wish I could afford to order a case of the devotionals to give away !
Love this!!! Thank you for sharing!
It was so refreshing reading your post and knowing that all of us make mistakes. We just need to be sorry for them and God takes care of the rest.
I want a confident heart. This message really hit the mark. I am my own worst enemy sometimes. I doubt myself and my abilities. I am glad God uses me in my weakest moments.
Renee, thank you so much for reminding me that God can still use me in spite of my failures and shortcoming.
I have battled self condemnation my whole life, and although made huge progress over the last couple of years, it loves to rear its ugly head and set me several steps back now and then. My deepest concern is to not influence my own children, but especially my daughters with this. I see them struggle with it and try fervently to denounce it in their lives and train them differently but it comes so natural and easy for us. I’m so grateful for this message that the constant battle I and (who knew so many) fight in their minds can be an area of victory in Christ, lived out to other women. Much thanks!!
This is me all the time. I’m constantly giving in to doubt which is only hurting my walk with God. I must force myself to stop and remember that no matter what I do, He love me.
Finally-an explanation between conviction and condemnation! And I know who is “The One” who brings conviction, and “the one” who brings condemnation, and I know which one I’m gonna listen to from now on!
Wow! I needed to hear this today. Thank you!
I love your devotional and would love a copy to give to a friend. You’ve been such a blessing to me. Thank you for following the Lord to minister to women like me.
I am a homeschool mom of two daughters one is now in her first yr of college she is now making decisions on her own and when she makes decisions I don’t agree with I feel I have failed as a mom. I am still homeschooling my second daughter and feel I am not living up to Gods expectations on teaching her. There are so many times I feel I am not good enough or I am not doing what God wants or how he wants me to do it. I so want to hear in eternity ” well done my good and faithful servant” and am afraid I won’t. Thanks for sharing your story and helping me see even if only for today that God’s grace is sufficient for each day.
There is such comfort in knowing that I am not the only mother, wife, woman who stumbles and falls sometimes. And your clarification of conviction vs. condemnation was extremely helpful. Thank you so much for answering Gods call to minister. You are a blessing and encouragement to many!
This word resonates with me, especially because this week I have felt so quilty about not following through with promises I made to The Lord regarding putting feet to my prayers and ‘getting out there’ …. visiting my unsaved friends and neighbours and sharing honestly with them about Jesus, instead of skirting around and around and just ‘being nice and kind and helpful’ but with no meat to the message. Thank you Lord for being specific with me, and I will NOT take on the guilt the enemy throws at me. I am completely undone by your love and your mercy and grace. And so thankful.
I am so encouraged when I read your down to earth honest happenings. What an encouragement and I feel a go girl.
Yes, I’ve been there too. But if God doesn’t convict me, then why do I convict myself. As one pastor taught, without some guilt we would not necessarily be cognizant or appreciative of that which is good and right. Guilt tells me that I was wrong and need to correct myself. Long-term self-punishment, on the other hand, reveals someone who doesn’t believe that God is forgiving nor that man is redeemed by God’s grace.
God continues to use your blog and devotionals in so many ways to reach me right where I am. I serve in children’s ministry at my church and I have in the past served in our church’s M.O.P.S. group. At times I feel that I’m not qualified to serve in these ares because I find myself losing my patience and messing up a lot with my children. Looking back on my mothering, I have felt that I have blown it in a lot of areas and felt I wasn’t qualified to mentor to moms in M.O.P.S. so I stepped down. Thank you for helping me see that God can still use me and that there is no condemnation in Christ. May God continue to use us all despite are flaws and weaknesses and may we always remember this truth.
God Bless!
Thank you for such an inspiring message. Would absolutely love a copy of your book.
What a wonderful reminder that my guilt and self doubt is not of God and by his grace I am set free. And thank you for sharing your personal experience with these same struggles.
Such an inspiring message. I definitely need to work on the confidence thing.
Thank you for the healing words.
Renée, my very first OBS was your A Confident Heart a year ago. I learned so much about myself and my relationship with God. I am sometimes left feeling doubtful and guilty for the same reason you spoke of in this post. Starting my day with a quiet time that refreshes my spirit and leads me into a day filled with God’s Love and Peace…only to be shattered by something that triggers an out of control response which then fills me with guilt and doubt. I loved being reminded once again about condemnation vs. conviction. I had downloaded the free eBook of your devotional but would love to have a copy to hold in my hands, to read during my quiet time. Thanks for this encouraging and inspirational post! God bless!
I loved your book and went through the online study when it first came out. I loved your honesty, the whole theme really resonated with me. God obviously used that to start a new work in me, as it’s been followed up with bible studies through my church about not believing satan’s lies and cleaning out my thought closet. 🙂 Replacing lies with God’s truth is an ongoing process, but oh so worth it! I am so grateful to you and all of the bible study authors and leaders out there who put so much of themselves into women’s ministries.
This is what I have been needing to hear. It gets really hard to not feel guilty when life gets into full swing.
Thank you so much for following Gods calling on your life and allowing yourself to be fully transparent and used by Him!!! I loved what you shared today! I really struggle with not hitting these ridiculous expectations that I have set for myself. I often find myself freezing from doing anything. I think because Im afraid that I will fail and am not good enough. I wonder if I maybe I misunderstood Gods path for me. Your devotional really gave me a glimmer of hope. Thank you for sharing and showing me that an anxious heavy heart can become confident and whole. Thank you again for sharing from your heart!
I have been blessed to be able to lead a group of young women (they are my youngest daughter’s age) in Bible Study for 10 years now. Your story so resonated with me because I have felt those same feelings on more than a few occasions….only I never have had a mentor who told me that I need to push on BECAUSE I needed what I was teaching as much as those I was teaching needed to hear my story and the lesson. Thanks for putting it all in perspective!
Renee, thanks so much for the encouragement you give us. I tend to condemn myself, allowing Satan to get a foothold. I am struggling to listen for the Holy Spirit’s conviction instead. I desire to serve Jesus however He guides me to do so.
I was searching for a new devotional today while delving into the Bible for the first time in quite some time… I am thankful to have found your particular entry, as well as Proverbs 31 devotionals in general!!
Thanks for the message. This is something I struggle with as well and needed to hear.
Thanks for sharing!
The comparisons between conviction and condemnation provide an example for me to filter my words too so that I do not give place to the evil one by refraining the lies he has spoken to me that had erroneously believed.
Thanks so much for sharing this. There are so many times I deal with trying to decipher condemnation and conviction. You made it so clear and easy to understand. I am very thankful for your posts. Thanks for your obedience in being transparent to speak to the lives of so many. I am blessed by your posts.
Julie
Wow, your words really spoke to me today. I strive to use kinder words but I don’t always succeed and am so grateful that God continues to love me and show me a better way to deal with upsets. thank you for your ministry.
Thank you for your devotion. It was an awesome reminder of how He forgives. I was also able to share it with my 15 year old daughter!
Guilt, that feels like my middle name. Condemnation seems to follow me everyday. My husband of 30 years left me 2 years ago and I still struggle everyday. What did I do wrong? I pray, plead everyday for help to get past the pain. I need the holy spirit to keep reminding me that I am worthy. I m reading one thousand gifts, by Ann Voskamp and am trying to find the joy in each day. I feel your book might help me move to another step. thankyou for your consideration.Please keep writing.
in your email today I felt it was for me. I have such a problem with this, and the enemy knows it but ill keep trying to build down and not be torn down doing my best
vick
Thank you for sharing the difference between what the enemy tells us and how the Holy Spirit would speak it . That helps me a lot ,I have been dealing with guilt and shame almost my whole life ,but I am a work in progress 😉
I find myself listening to the condemnation and thanks to this devotional I can see gods truth through the lies. I’m learning to Listen to god and pay more attention. Thanks for this it was just what I needed to hear.
I really enjoyed reading your devotional. Thank you.
Guilt, for everything big and small, has plagued me for so long. Thanks for the comparison to how the enemy would say it and how God would speak to us about it.
I missed the opportunity to download your e copy of A Confident Heart,. Please think about doing it again.
Thanks for sharing your words so openly with us.
Thank you for the words of encouragement. I fall for the condemnation/guilt/self-doubt combo all the time, especially as a single mother who feels responsible for everything. I plan to pray about things and listen more closely for what truly comes from the Lord!
Renee, your blog today spoke directly to my heart. I am in an emotional war of do I stay or do I go in my marriage and in a physical battle of an eating disorder. The feelings of guilt and feeling unloved become more than one can deal with day after day. Your encouragement gives me hope bringing Gods promises to light. Thank you. Marti
This really spoke to my heart today. Thank you for sharing! Guilt is such a strong and powerful word, yet it can bring along so much hurt as well. There see times throughout my day that guilt just overcomes me. Your words are an inspiration. Thank you!