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Sometimes I wonder how I can go from being in such a good place with God … feeling peaceful, loving and patient.. but then something happens that sends me into an orbit of aggravation!!
It happened just the other day…
Things were going well. I’d had a lovely afternoon working from home. Alone. Life was peachy.
But then school got out and kids came home. Within 15 minutes of arrival, one of my boys did something and said something that wasn’t so peachy. Then he did NOT do something I’d asked him to do and let’s just say… I lost all my peace and patience right there in the middle of my kitchen.
I was not happy.at.all. And I let my precious boy know it in a not-so-nice kind of way.
Then I felt GUILTY and like the WORST MOM on the planet.
For a few minutes I was pretty sure that’s exactly how God wanted me to feel ~ so I wouldn’t act so ugly the next time.
But finally, after I’d almost convinced myself that I was the worst mom and had no business in ministry, I remembered something a pastor said about the difference between conviction and condemnation. He explained it like this:
Condemnation sweeps across our thoughts with generalized statements such as, You’re such a failure, You’re so hypocritical, or You can never be counted on. That is the accuser. His tone is condemning, questioning, and confusing. His accusations lead to guilt and shame.
But the Holy Spirit’s conviction will be specific. He will reveal a sinful action or attitude and instruct us on what we need to do to right the wrong: whether it’s restoring a broken relationship or returning something that isn’t ours. He’ll give us steps we need to take to change our behavior or attitude.
• Instead of You’re such a failure as a [wife, mom, daughter, friend], the Spirit might say, You were really critical the way you talked to _________ (your husband, child, parent, etc). You need to say you are sorry and ask for forgiveness. Then tell them something that will build them up instead of tearing them down.
• Instead of You’re so hypocritical, the Spirit might say, You judge others for gossiping, but you are doing the same thing when you talk about your neighbor at work. Tomorrow at lunch break, apologize for what you said and share a few things that are positive about her.
• Instead of You can never be counted on, the Spirit might say, You didn’t keep your promise to go see your mom today. Call her to apologize and maybe set up a lunch date for this weekend.
Satan condemns accusingly, to make us feel guilty. God convicts lovingly, to lead our hearts to repentance. {tweet this?}
Jesus’ convictios draws us away from destructive behavior that hinders our relationship with Him and with others. His goal is to bring us out of the darkness of sin and back into the Light, so we can walk with Him in the freedom of forgiveness and the confidence of His love.
The next time we blow it or lose it, let’s ask Jesus to replace our guilt-induced doubt with HIS grace-infused confidence, as we hold onto the promise that His grace is sufficient because His power is made perfect in our weakness.
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Thanks for being open & honest & reminding us about grace.
Trying to be all things to all people is impossible, I feel I fall short and therefore I must be guilty for trying to do this all on my own. I know I can’t. This story is encouraging and forgiving! God is Good all the time!
This is my first time to your sight….
I was raised by a perfectionist, to be a perfectionist. I’m so thankful that God is moving me from
‘perfectionist’ to ‘growing in Christ’. Perfectionism is all-or-nothing, Growth is little-by-little.
Perfectionism is all about the goal, where Growth is all about the journey. I’m a better person since
God has introduced growth to me. I am getting better and better at relying on Christ
and His grace, instead of on myself and my own weak abilities.There is so much freedom there!
Your devotion resonated with me this morning. Satan loves to use my old perfectionistic tendencies
to condemn me, but God is helping my ears hear more of His Spirit these days, and I’m so thankful for
that. I believe your devotional book would be another blessing to me from God. Thank you for what you
do. It made a difference to me today, and I know it makes a difference for many others.
I struggle with getting out of the condemnation and focusing instead on the conviction from the Holy Spirit and fixing my actions. Often times, I will believe Satan’s lies and continue to punish myself. Thank you for being so honest and open with your own struggles, as they are truly helping me to identify and work through mine! I would love to win this book but will definitely purchase a copy if I don’t win 🙂
Thank you so much for sharing your stories. For me, learning of other people’s struggles helps me in my walk. Definitely words I needed to hear. God know who needs them and always sends them at the time we need them.
Ladies really need one another despite our proud independent ways. Sharing honestly, praying heartfelt, and seeking forgiveness will always mend hearts together for the journey of life.
My mother passed away early in my life and it’s always amazed me how God has placed many wonderful Christian ladies in my path to help lead the Godly way.
I pray often for compassion because I’ll never know of any circumstance where sweet compassion doesn’t make a difference.
Created to Serve.
I really enjoyed this message – as a wife and mom I feel I make many mistakes each day and end up feeling discouraged and guilty. Wonderful reminder that I need to ask God for help and forgiveness throughout my day and he will never let me down.
I feel so lucky to have started my day reading both your Encouragement for Today and Blog post. It was perfect timing. I lost my patience with my small kiddos yesterday, they had been misbehaving so badly at my doctor appointment, that it was cut short and I was asked to leave the building! I was mortified, embarrassed and angry. I said something to them that I wish I hadn’t – and have been feeling like the Worst Mom in the World. I feel so guilty. Your post made me feel a lot better and gave me some tools to work through this. Thank you! I’d love to read your book!
This was a much needed devotional for me. I often deal with self condemnation, always very critical of myself and thoses closest to me. Many people have told me I expect perfection from myself and often my children. When I feel as though I have missed the mark I am very quick to condemn myself, on being a good friend, mother, person, daughter, girlfriend, employee, etc.
Thanks
I can identify with your devotion today. I’ve been feeling the same thoughts when dealing with my daughters. Trying to teach them about the love of the Lord, but struggling to live it out daily, when messes and attitudes and fussing toddlers abound. But His grace is there! To pick us all back up and place on the rock Christ Jesus. Thank you for your thoughts today.
I love the explanation of condemnation vs. conviction! It is just what I needed to hear! Thanks for sharing it with us.
Awesome Word this morning and explanation of God’s grace and His loving conviction and not condemnation! I also loved reading others testimonies. It’s so great to see God work.
I cannot put into words, how much your life has spoken to mines in regards to guilt – induced doubt. Of all days, I needed to hear this message. Even as Christians, we never feel good enough to serve GOD, but HE takes our brokeness and does something miraculas in ourselves and others. Thank you Renee, for reminding us that we do not have to perfect to serve GOD. We just have to be a willing vessel, no matter how broken.
Thank you so much for this good word of truth. I find it so easy to go right into the self-pity zone of wallowing when I realize that I’ve sinned. That somehow makes me feel better about my sinfulness. Thank you for this truth that I am set free from guilt and able to walk in the truth of conviction by the Spirit. Amen!
What a great explanation of conviction vs. condemnation! And I find that when things are really happening in the ministry I facilitate, that’s when the Accuser begins to work overtime! Amazing how quickly we accept his condemnation. Thanks for the clarification.
I know your devotionals are for women and I DO get alot from them. But often there are things that can help my son….such as this one about Condemnation and Conviction…..and I will share with him as well! Thanks!
So often I struggle to decipher what’s the Holy Spirit and what’s the enemy speaking to me. Today I got out of your blog that it’s so necessary to really listen to what is being said. You said is it generalities or specifics…which I love! But then I also got to thinking…is it truth or lies? Am I running by what’s said in my head with the word to check it’s accuracy? Does it go against what God teaches me as truth? Thank you so much for sharing your life so honestly!! It was a joy to read this morning. 🙂
Thank you so much for actually sharing from your heart and soul. We all know that God loves us so very much – HE gave his life for us – yet there are moments when we all struggle with something or someone or some assignment and feel so unworthy of what HE has done for us.
Love this book – I have it on my kindle and I try to read it daily! I would love to win a book for my friend who still likes to feel the pages of a book in her hands! Thanks for all you do for God’s glory – you inspire me!
Whoa! Do I ever get the “self-induced doubt” concept…I’m mothering 3 teenagers!!! Somehow I managed to go from a loving and attentive mother and wife to “pathetic” and a “loser” (this is what they say to me) in a span of a few years! It’s crushing!!! And, in our interactions, I often find myself acting or speaking in ways that seem “foreign” to me; so my self -doubt is soaring! But you said two things that really gave me focus: (1) God doesn’t condemn; He uses conviction to show us where we erred. (2) God uses people with great faults for His even greater purposes and good!!! So, today I’m gonna breathe deeply and listen for the Holy Spirit to guide me through the rough patches! Thank You!