“We can trust God’s plans as we realize that His story is being written into ours. His power is perfected in the broken places we consider to be our greatest weaknesses – our most vulnerable emotions we don’t want anyone to know about. In those hiding places, God calls us out of captivity. When we’re willing to let Him, He brings hope for our future despite the pain of our past.” – Chapter 4
Chapter 4 takes a lot of courage. And I’m so proud of you for being here and not giving up, for wanting all He has for you. I know your Heavenly Father is so proud of you too, for your pursuit and your willingness to walk with Him one step at a time. Remember Christ died to forgive our sins but also to heal our souls so that we can live in Him – with HOPE again!
Don’t give up friend, no matter what! Stay close to Jesus. Stay connected here. We’re in this together. HE is so worthy!! And you? You are so worth it!!
Here’s this week’s messages. Please don’t miss it. I want to be able to share with you face to face this. You were on my mind and in my prayers when I filmed this teaching several weeks ago. Please click the arrow below to watch.
Message Notes: You can download video “Message Notes” in a PDF format here or in a MSWord doc here. I encourage you to watch it once and just let God speak to your heart. Then if you want to, watch it a second time and follow along with the message notes which include parts of the message, verses and blanks to fill in. 🙂
I know the timelines I encourage you to do are scary for many. I really do understand. And it takes time. I wish I had shared that more clearly in the book. Today I’m praying for God to give you courage and perseverance to press through any fear that would keep you from starting it. Fear is Satan’s way of keeping us from the freedom God wants in our lives. You don’t have to do a timeline if you don’t want to or if God doesn’t lead you to. The reason I encourage one is because it’s valuable for us to identify memories and emotions caused in the past that play a role in how you see ourselves and others, and how we handle life and relationships today.
In her comments under this post, May shared how she’s been taking it a little at a time and how answering the questions at the end of the chapter has helped her start her timeline.
Connecting in Community: Let’s share with each other what God showed you through our video message? Also, if you feel comfortable, please share some of your answers to questions at end of Chapter 4.
Click “share your thoughts” right below this post and do just that. I’ll be here reading and praying and commenting as time allows. Let’s take a minute today to pray for or encourage someone else as time allows. This chapter is one where it sure is good to know we have friends here to pray and walk beside us, isn’t it? LOVE you guys!!!
I havent had a chance to watch the video yet, but I wanted to let you know what an encouragement and challenge this chapter has been for me! I have slammed my book closed several times not wanting to face the reality of what God is trying to teach me and how He wants to change me for the better…Ugh. I will reread where I left off and pray that I can be courageous to do the hard things.
Also, I was just able to share some of the chapters verses with a close friend who’s husband is struggling with hidden sin, paranoia, untruth, and so much more- just came to a head this week and they are both praying hard. Please pray for them as they face the devil head on with God’s truth! Thanks!
Renee, thank you so much for surrendering your story to all of us. You are helping me look at my past and let God begin to heal it completely. I no longer want to be great for Him, I just want to sit at His feet and drink from His cup and bring others to the source of healing.
Thank you for your encouraging video, Renee. My husband & I dealt many years with the loss & sadness due to infertility & miscarriages. Twenty years later & now being the mother of 5 beautiful children that God has blessed us with through adoption, I still find myself struggling with this past hurt & loss. This chapter has been a real breakthrough for me & has given me the guidance to begin healing from these painful experiences. Thanks so much again & blessings to you.
Renee, loved the video. One of my favorite verses is Jeremiah 29:11, and it wasn’t until recently that I read further and found verse 14. WOW does that say it all, I will be found by you, says the Lord. Prayers lifted up for all. I’m still struggling with getting head knowledge into my heart but I’m not giving up. Thanks Renee for taking the time to encourage us in the journey.
Dear Renee,
Thank you for this wonderful study. I read Chapter 4 on Monday, and I did my timeline the next day, even before I looked at the questions. I didn’t want to put it off, and I wanted the healing you said it would bring. I was surprised on some of the things that made it onto the timeline but more surprised by the things that didn’t. As I was doing it, it was as if the Lord was revealing the “major” hurts and happenings that has made me me. I was also surprised by the things that brought tears that I thought I had dealt with and the things I was able to write down as just a happening that I realized I had moved on from or at least for now.
What I noticed that I had moved on from was the stuff that I had worked through forgiving the person. One of the things that helps me do that is: Hurting people hurt people. While I was writing one of the things that still bring tears and a lot of them, the song from David Crowder Band came on “How He Loves.” So while I was sitting there crying, I was reminded how much God loves me and how He’s right there walking through life with me.
Thank you Renee and dear sisters in Christ for being transparent and allowing healing to come in our vulnerable places.
HI Renee!
I could relate to what you were saying in the video. I too have become critical and resentful of my husband but unlike you, I am not sure why. We have been married 12 years with two beautiful children. I am so blessed. I am not sure why I have become so controlling and hard on him. I am praying for God to bring me clarity as I am on this journey with you. My hope is that I discover what in my past is holding me back from recieving the promises of my future. I pray for a confident heart as I take hold of GOd’s hope and healing He has for my life. Thanks for all your insight!
Renee, I agree with everything you said in the video. It can be so painful to let God take you through the process but it is so worth it! It took me a few years to really walk through it all with God and like your marriage, mine was also affected. I carried into my marriage the baggage of an alcoholic, perfectionistic father, the struggle of losing all our possessions to his addiction when I was in my early teens and then abuse by my step-grandfather. When I met my husband I was a mess and looking for someone to love me and make everything ok. I had many, many unrealistic expectations I put on him. It almost cost me the marriage, but praise the Lord for His healing in my life and in my marriage and we are coming upon our 14th anniversary. The Lord makes all things new and in Him we are new creations and can have hope for our future despite what happened in the past. Psalm 40:1-3 are my life verses.
Confident Heart Sisters,
Even though it will be a challenge to write out our “hurtful” timelines full of pain, let’s stay focused on Him. Let’s LET GO, and LET GOD! Let’s truly let His truth cut to the core of our struggles bringing purpose to our pain, redemption from our past, and HOPE for our future! We aren’t alone in this…we are all together! And have God right here with us! Prayers are being lifted up for YOU!!!!!
Chapter 4 is a hard chapter for me, but I know that now is the time the Lord has ordained for me to let go of my past hurts, sins and disappointments so that God can set this captive free. I started my timeline this morning in my quiet time and it went back to when I was 9 years old. I cried and cried over hurt, pain and dissilusionment, but somehow I know God was there with me, heard me and will set me free. I know that this morning the Lord “looked with compassion on all my ruins; he will make my deserts like Eden, my wastelands like the garden of the LORD. ” I am taking this slow, one day at a time, and have puposed to see this through..thank you Renee, for allowing God to use you for such a time as this.
Wow, what a wonderful study! God Bless all you for sharing your thoughts with me. I just began the program…and I believe there’s a timeline for everything, and God deal with us individually, and in our time. I too suffered abandonment as child, and came from a home where there was alcoholism . It has taken me years to accepted it, and lived denail for quiet some time., I’ve developed mechanism through the years to help cope the pain and hurt of growing up with a parent that’s an alcoholist., I became a perfectionist, and controlling individual. I am still, even thought I had have relationships in the past for fear of commitment and getting hurt, and rejection. I became the care giver for my mom, and it has been bitter-sweet, and also forgave my dad and took care of him till the very end. I’ve been experiencing flashbacks of my past since last year and I believe that’s God trying to heal my heart and giving me hope for the future, I’ve discovered things about myself I didn’t know before. I believe just like Reene said its the Holy Spirit bring in out those areas, those thoughts in me that keep me captive and prevent me from moving forward. I wish someone would share their thoughts on their own process of healing.
EI am here praying for you all. I hope to get the book soon…just been a tight couple of months. But the tax refund is on the way! I am so blessed by the devotions and sharing…y’all are amazing. I will hope to be playing catcheup soon! God bless you all.
I am here praying for you all. I hope to get the book soon…just been a tight couple of months. But the tax refund is o other the way! I am so blessed by the devotions and sharing…y’all are amazing. I will hope to be playing catchup soon! God bless you all.
What a timely blessing this study has been for me. Before beginning this study, I had already been on a journey of looking at my own timeline with the help of a counselor. I’m still going through the proc ess of dealing with the hurts of the past and seeing where I’ve brought them into my present. Renee, I’m in such a similar place currently with my husband and I’m praying daily that I will stop bringing my past into our marriage and let God heal that past so I can see what He’s doing for my future. For the last few months, I was beginning to wonder if it was all worth it because so many things in our relationship have not been right. I’ve been basically a single mom for the last four years and I’ve been wondering how much longer I can do life like this. With this study and the help of a counselor, I’m working through a huge process of dealing with my past and learning to let go of that, give it to God and allow Him to heal that hurt so that I can move on to the future He has prepared for me. I highlighted many things in this chapter this week. So many things really hit home with me. The last one I have is “God’s love is not only perfect and unfailing, it redeems and restores. His truth cuts to the core of our struggles, bringing purpose to our pain, redemption from our past, and hope for our future!” What an amazing God we serve. I’ve struggled with bringing Him my pain because I felt selfish and ungrateful for all the other things in my life that are such blessings. I didn’t want to be complaining about my problems when I do recognize so much He has blessed me with. But I see that He WANTS me to talk to Him in this way and by doing this, it allows me to be the one to let go of what’s bothering me and give it to Him to handle. What a difficult time I have had facing some of the truths about my past and how I’ve brought it into my present. The process has been so hard and yet so freeing at the same time. I finally had a small glimpse of hope in my marriage relationship that maybe things could actually be better. It will still be a process of changing how we relate to each other because we have been in the same cycle for 21 years. So, the changes are difficult, but I’m trusting God to redefine my future in this marriage, not through the filter of the past and pain, but through the power of His life-changing promises.
Praying for you and your family Renee, as you face what seems like the devil attacking your family in sickness and injury. Thank you so much for your encouraging video this week. I came across this study on facebook and it signed up for it and I feel it was God leading me to a study for just what I am currently going through. I relate to your story as well as so many others I have read on this blog. I pray for each and everyone doing this study that God will open our hearts to His healing so we can have the future He wants for us. God bless you all as you walk your journey with God and with all of us here.
Hello Renee,
God bless you for the great work you are doing. As I listen to the video, I could relate to it although it was outling my husband, he too, was involved in a broken home at an early age. I thank you for sharing. I will take this and process it and seek the face of my Father and lean on Him for the strength as the Holy Spirit moves in my husband to heal all brokeness. I will pray for strength to wait as the Holy Spirit do what I can not. Thank you much. God’s blessing!
Hi Renee and ladies,
Wow, this chapter is powerful. The video message brings the message of hope to life by being transparent and honest. Aster is prescious! I have not started my time line. I have so much to process. I am afraid that if I get into my childhood and then move through my series of bad choices I will get behind on the study. I will need an entire day alone with God to work through my past unmet expectations, hurts, and my unforgiveness. I have stuffed all the emotions that go along with hurt and disappointment down and tried to ignore them, but they leak into my life. I will claim God’s promises of hope and work through the timeline a little at a time so I can continue this study.
I so know what you mean Valerie and am praying for you and all of the women who are here. It is difficult to process childhoods, and being that I don’t remember much about mine I tend to focus on the things I did because of the rejection and feelings of being unloved. I also tried to make everything nice which is what I have done most of my adult life. Fix others, God’s job, but try and I don’t have to address myself. That was how I lived. I searched for love in all the wrong places and faces, my regrets are many, but I know now that Jesus was with me through it all, and by His grace I am forgiven and being made whole. He is healing my heart, not always in ways we would like, but He is with me…Thank you ladies for being with me also in Spirit!
My pain is in the past as well as on going……24 years of marriage to a man who is not at all what he claimed to be prior to marriage in terms of basic character. Years of broken promises and ongoing emotional abuse and neglect are taking a toll. Functionally I am a single parent, and work to hard to stay strong for my kids, one in high school and one in college. A friend recently pointed out that in trying to be strong I have spend 2 decades “stuffing” my emotions. I don’t even know how to pour my heart out to God…..when I try I feel like I’m complaining, being selfish, or ungrateful that He gave me salvation, the biggest gift. God is sovereign and He chose this path for me. I know He loves me, but most of the time I feel like an empty shell of a woman.
Kathy,
My heart goes out to you. You are not being selfish at all. God cares for you as a Father and will listen to anything you have to say. He will bring you peace and comfort. I don’t think He chose a path of pain, neglect, or abuse. Seek Him always, He is there for you with open arms. I am praying for you.
Kathy –
You and I are walking in similar shoes. I, too, have been married 24 years…and I wish I could say my husband is my best friend, but at this point I wonder if I really even know him anymore. He has chosen in recent years to fill his life with other pursuits, worship other “gods,” and keep his feelings/emotions hidden. I have felt “ditched” and neglected and at the bottom of his priority list. I have functioned as a single parent for most of my years as a mother because of him either being unavailable or because of his own childhood wounds that cause him to avoid difficult decisions, tasks and responsibilities involved with parenting. I know the only person I can change is me, but sometimes it’s a lonely place. I know your struggle of feeling like you have to “be strong” for everyone around you. Our marriage has had ups and downs for several years, and it almost ended 2 years ago, when my husband said he wanted a divorce and walked out on us for 6 weeks, because he didn’t want to deal with our issues and was tired of the conflict (which he wouldn’t work with me to resolve). I was crushed that he would not fight for me, or for our marriage. Thankfully, God preserved us, and we are back together, and I know my husband regrets things he said and did, but it is more difficult for me to trust and believe his words, since doubt now has a foothold. I am so grateful that my God will never lie to me, mislead me, be unavailable for me, withdraw from me, neglect me, or reject me….I realize that is what I’ve wanted from my husband all these years, and it is something he can never provide. I’m learning to be grateful for my imperfect marriage, because if my husband was all I needed and wanted him to be, I would probably never have gone deeper in my relationship with God and desired him to be my closest companion. It has been good for me to rediscover my sense of “self,” rather than just pouring myself into everyone else and ignoring my own needs and issues. God is giving me compassion for my husband, where once there was only anger and resentment. I know that down deep my husband wants what I want, which is unconditional love and respect, and I need to be patient and let my husband work through his own wounds. It is definitely a process for me get to know Jesus well enough where he becomes my everything, and everyone else and everything else is just an extra “gift.” I do believe that as we’re obedient to our God, faithful to our vows, and finding our worth and identity in Christ, rather than in the things we do, or in being Mrs. XX, that God will work all things together for our good. I can’t make my partner stay, or make him do the right things, but I can pray for him and believe in him, even when I’m disillusioned with him. So, I’m praying for you today, Kathy….and praying that our 25th anniversaries will bring reassurance of God’s unfailing love, and bring new beginnings in our marriages. Here is an article I came across recently that gave me some new perspective on marriage. I hope you (and anyone else out there struggling in your marriage), will find it helpful:
http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/relationship/features/27749-you-never-marry-the-right-person
I just want to say thanks to all of you sisters out there, for “being there” and reminding me that we’re not alone in our struggles, and for giving me a safe place to share without compromising my family’s privacy.
Thank you for sharing you are not alone aqny of you I too have struggled in my marriage in much the same ways you all do. So thanks for the encouraging words. I can see at times my husband does try. we have been married for 18 years now, and i know that God is not through working with us so there is still hope. God Bless and prayers are with you.
Kathy & Lisa:
I feel your pain and you are not alone. Two years ago I went to a Divorce Care group at my church which helped me crawl out of the place I was hiding and brought me closer to God. After 18 years of marriage and several different counselors I finally asked my husband to leave. I was tired of his put-downs and our relationship was not healthy for the kids. Through the Divorce group I found forgiveness for my spouse, he still tries to find ways to hurt me. We are not divorced(long story) and he does do things with our son so I see him often. He finds ways to try to “control” me and push my buttons, I have learned to block that out and turn it over to God in prayer.
This study has been great to give us a place to “get it out in the open” and realize we are not alone in our struggles – we have God and each other.
Praying for you Kathy. I am in a similiar position. I have been married for 22 years. Our relationship has been rocky. I also have stuffed many emotions throught my husbands drug addiction, pornography and bankruptcy. God used those things to help me see that I was putting my security and confidence in my husband and not in God. It is still rough. Stuffing my emotions has also led me to depression and now panic attacks. My 19 year old daughter is suffering with social anxiety. She does not have her license or a job. There is no money for counseling and we have no insurance. My husband is getting phone calls all the time from bill collectors. He refuses to tell me how much money he owes. He does not communicate about anything that goes on in our life. Most of the time I feel so alone. Many days I just want to leave. Praying for a miracle!
Hi sweet Renee and beautiful Confident sisters!
I want you to know that time constraints with my job and family have kept me from commenting as often as I’d like but you are prayed for each and every day. I want to offer encouragement to you as you seek strength to dive into the pain of the past. I am now reading ACH for the third time and am just now confidently feeling healing is just around the corner! For many months, I just chose to believe that I could confidently address my own weaknesses…today I am doing that through counseling and I marvel at how God uses Renee’s own story to give me hope.
Keep running toward the goal, sisters. Healing is near. God can use all of you, even your pain and shame for His glory.
Exchanging ashes for beauty,
Lisa
Lisa, thank you for praying for all of us and for sharing your story. Reading the book for the third time shows that you are actively seeking and searching for spiritual answers and God’sdirect healing. I am proud of you 🙂
At our Sabbath women’s study tonight, we talked about our timelines. Some of us were afraid to share ours because our past did not seem as painful as those persons with addiction, divorce, death, etc. We worked hard as a group to validate each person’s experience and accept each person where they are on this journey.
Rebecca: That was great that you made sure to validate everyone’s experience. I know in some groups I have been in the “drama” of some of the stories takes over and others are left out and that is not what God intends to happen.
Thanks for your message Renee. I think the hardest part for me right now is allowing the emotions/memories to come up so God can heal them and set me free. I know they’re there. I can feel that “something” needs to be healed and I want to face it. But it’s just not coming up. Thank you for praying.
Right now, I’m very frustrated. I’m sad, tired of trying…can’t get anything right…so much in me that’s messed up, i don’t know where to start. Can’t find the joy and happiness in my life I once had…emotions are out of whack…trying to hold on with everything I’ve got…everything.
Christina, I don’t know what all you’re going through, but as I read your post I couldn’t help but think of David’s prayer in Psalm 51. Certainly at that time that David wrote that, he may have been feeling many of the things you mentioned. I am praying that God will “create in you a new heart, and renew a steadfast spirit within you….and restore to the joy of your salvation.” Don’t give up! Bring all those frustrations and emotions to God…he wants you to share them with him. In recent years, I have found great comfort in knowing there isn’t any emotion I can experience that Jesus didn’t experience….we can’t shock him or tell him anything that will cause him to turn away. He was God, and without sin, but he was also 100% human and was NOT without emotion. He experienced anger, fear, pain, betrayal, temptation, abandonment, etc. I pray you’ll let him be the one to hold you together. Praying for good rest and good health for you this week, and for God to take care of the rest!
And Renee – praying for protection and healing for you and your family as well. Ever since this study began you’ve faced one difficulty after another, and we know ol’ Satan hates that TRUTH is being spoken through you. I’m so glad to see you’re standing strong and staying positive….many of us would have crumbled with even one of the setbacks you’ve had recently….I admire your steadfastness! I know your strength is found in the Lord, and that shows. Blessings on you this week!
I have to correct my post because it is bugging me! What was I thinking speaking of Jesus in past tense! 🙂 I said Jesus “was” God….but we know Jesus IS God!! Thank you, Jesus, for coming to earth, and walking among us, so you can now identify with everything we will experience in this life.
“I will be found by you….and bring you back from captivity” I love this verse and on page 81 of the book I love your explaination that we can find him again and again…. “The one who can lead us to freedom from the captivity of our doubts and insecurities.” My struggle often comes from myself trying find my own way out of the insecurities and then living with the guilt of being unsuccessful. Praise God he never gives up on us and he is always there waiting to be found so that he can show his love to us. I believe he is leading each of us back to those areas in our lives so that he can reveal himself in a greater way than he ever has to us. Yes the timelines are difficult and I too am afraid to go back and face some things but God is there waiting right along side all those pains and his perfect love can and will erase the pain and he will lead us out of captivity! I would like to share something that I believe the Lord called to my rememberance that I never knew was in my heart. I have a sister who is 5 years younger than me. We are different as night and day. I tend to have angry feelings toward her and I have never really been able to determine why. I love her but there are times that I just do not like her ways. Shortly after my sister was born my parents divorced. This week as I was praying over everything we have read in chapter 4 I felt the Lord take me back to that time and I realized that after 35 years I have harbored resentments toward her and felt as if she was part of the reason my parents divorced…… in reality she was not and I know that but as a child I did not. I have God to forgive me and I praised him for showing me this. I am plannning on going to her and asking for her forgivness. Please pray for God’s perfect timing and more importantly for both of us to be healed. .Oh just typing this has brought such peace to me…Thank you Renee God is definitely doing a marvelous work! I am so thankful for this study and exicted about what the Lord is doing and is going to continue to do. I encourage everyone to ask God to take you by the hand and led you back where he would have you to go….. remember he will lead you out of anything that has held you captive…….. never to face the fear of your past again. I am aksing him….Let’s do this together!
Stacy, I pray your sister will receive your forgiveness and the two of you will be fully reconciled and have the relationship you were meant to have. I thank God for the peace He’s given you in revealing to you the source of your hurt that was the divorce and not your sister.
Stacy, Your story brings a heartfelt prayer for you and your sister. God has healing you already.
Renee,
I am staring the timeline right in the face. What a brilliant idea but it scares the daylights out of me. Even though I feel like I have dealt with the things from my past, I fear what I may have buried just to survive. This will take a lot of prayer and most likely a lot of tears but I am ready and I am willing.
Anna- God will be there waiting on you and he will wipe away those tears as they wash you clean and free! I will be praying for you and I ask that you pray for me! We are going to do this through the grace and the wonderful mercies of our Lord!
A big “thank you” to everyone who has been sharing here. You are all so transparent and caring towards one another, and it has been a blessing to me. Many thanks!
This is my first post but I have been trying to catch up and still a chapter behind. I haven’t read this one yet but I have thought of doing a timeline this past year to make some sense into the past. Many people say don’t think of the past but there are times when we do without asking to, it just is a trigger. In fact, with PTSD, many people have a hard time not thinking of the past when triggers come and that could be daily depending on the situation. I hear about so many marriages should be saved and clinging on to save them but I do think there are those that are not equally yoked and in making a choice to divorce we are making a choice to be free from things we cannot control. Maybe I”m wrong, but one of the things of churches is that divorce is shunned yet we do have knowledge of what to do when people are hurting us. Sometimes we can follow but we can’t make others see the light. And in fact, in my past marriages (2) it would have been a dangerous thing to stay married.
I do believe though that the future will be brighter if equally yoked with a Christian man. My own dad did the best he could but as all of us had issues that caused heartbreak. Forgiving him was the best thing I ever did.
My timeline seems to repeat alot of losses so it is something to be a bit sad but I plan to do it. I don’t want to repeat the past again.
Cling to the truths we are learning and the Lord will lead you to a much brighter tomorrow. I know this is true because I started life in a bad situation and then made many bad choices, but I am beginning to see that life can be so much happier. Praying for you Jennifer!
His love is simply amazing!!! I cannot believe how much this study is helping with my doubt and pain from my past. I look forward to reading the chapters, just to see what He will reveal to me. Renee, thank you for being an amazing tool of His love, your desire to help women is such a gift that He has blessed you with.
I feel like every single word in this book is written just for me. It is amazing. I find myself highlighting paragraohs at a time not just sentences.
I feel the same way Andi!
Renee, thank you for the videos. I havent posted as much lately but I am reading, journaling, answering questions and have been working through my timeline. It’s amazing what God will reveal to you.
Hi friends, let’s pray for each other and just commit to pray for our timelines. Start jotting down a a few things and maybe we can work on this together next week. Not sure how but if I can get rid of this bronchitis I’m open to talking through it and walking through it by sharing mine with you. Just need to see if my new meds start to work. I speak out of town tomorrow night and then have a rest and retreat weekend with some friends – so looking forward to that. 🙂 Praying and loving your hearts for Him and each other. You bless me!!!
I enjoyed the video, I have been processing the pain of my past for some time now, and for all my sisters who are afraid, it is scary, but remember that Jesus is there with you and realizing how He feels about us makes all the difference in the world. It is so joyous to have Him heal you. The joy is amazing. I know i’m not completely there either, I love how Renee said it is a process. I know the Lord is not finished with me yet, but will continue to do the good work in me. Thanks so much Renee. Praying for everyone here to not be afraid to let Jesus heal us all!
Blessings
One of my favorite verses of scripture is Jeremiah 29:11. I’ll admit though that I wanted to shout AMEN when I kept reading to hear “then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you and will bring you back from captivity”!!! That deserves an AMEN!
I never fully got this passage until now. I always emphasized verse 11 but there’s really good stuff that follows!
I have to admit that I haven’t done the timeline yet and I’m nervous to do so. It scares me to really process mistakes I’ve made and scars I’ve been left with. I’ve talked to God about them and have confessed them to Him but I still carry alot of guilt and shame.
It’s going to take time but I’m ready to follow God out of the captivity that keeping me from being all that God wants me to be.
Praise God for you Renee….thank you for your courage, your vision and for leading us on this journey.
I understand this too!!! Jer 29:11 has been my life verse for 20 years adn i never thought about the verses after until this past December when i was going through one of the most difficult times of my life. I read on searching for “there has to be more than this” and then claimed that i would be found by god and brought out of captivity. He didn’t bring me where I thought I was going, but He brought me to an even better place, out of captivity from myself!!! Thank you all ladies for being here and I thank God for using you Renee, As always he knew His perfect timing was going to bring me to this study for such a time as this!!!
Amen to Jeremiah 29:11! I am seeing it also…..through this study I am learning I am the one who is responsible for my captivity and when I seek God He is there to set me free. It is when I don’t constantly seek Him the devil tries to intervene. It is really obvious to me now how I need and want God to fill me up completely, every minute of every day….. above anything else in this world.
One quote from chapter 4 that spoke to where I am right now is “When we let Jesus pour His healing power into our lives, His love flows into our pain and cleanses the wounds from our past. As we come to know God and fully rely on His love for us, we stop allowing the past to determine our future.” The video and chapter are what I need to hear. I’ve just recently realized that until I work though the hurt and disappointment of many years, and I will not have peace. It is hard, and sometimes I feel like giving up, but It helps to know that I don’t have to work through it alone, and the image of His love flowing into my pain is keeping me going.
I so know what you are feeling Jennifer! It is so hard, but as we press on, for me, knowing there are the Jennifer’s and the others who feel the same helps me get through it….Thank you my sister…Peggy
I love that idea of pouring into our pain. It is that hurt empty place that waits for healing that is getting filled with Jesus.
I am new to the group study, and as i was reading the thoughts, I felt Good I am some place where I can finally be understood,I have been through a lot in my life starting at the age of three. and I do remember those awful times, and I can’t talk about them, hopefully i can tell God all about them. Asking for his help now.
Victoria,
I was looking for an encouraging scripture for you and turned to Psalm 40. I hope you have time to read it. Right now, I think that vs. 17 describes your plea to God: “Yet I am poor and needy; may the Lord think of me. You are my help and my deliverer; O my God, do not delay.” God loves you and wants to deliver you from your past so you can walk into the future He has for you. Trust Him and He will provide just what you need.
Victoria, I love the Psalm that Donna has encouraged you to read. I also had a lot of pain from my childhood and Psalm 40:1-3 has become my life verses. I have walked through and processed through that pain with the Lord and although it is hard, as Renee said, it is SOOO worth it! Cry out to the Lord, cry on His shoulder and let Him heal. Do what He says do, no matter how hard, because it will set you free. He will lift you up from the pit and set Your feet on His Rock of truth. He will make your steps secure and you will have a song of praise to sing to Him. Others will see what He has done in you and will turn to Him as well. Blessings dear sister!
Brandee,
Well said! Great , sound, God given advice. It lifted me up when I read it.
God Bless us all.
The Lord be magnified!!
So many things spoke to me in this chapter but I will name just a few. He knows our past and our pain can actually lead us to his plans and hope for our future. It is encouraging to know that god knows what hurts and struggles we are facing in our lives and can use these hurts/struggles for his good and his plan for our lives.
I identified with your statement I have always felt like a pine tree, tossed by the winds of my emotions, defined by my circumstances, and uprooted by life’s storms.
No matter what you have done or what as been done to you, god has a plan for your life. He wants to use everything he has brought you to, to bring you through.
Learning to live in the security of god’s promises is a daily journey of dependence. His love is not only perfect and unfailing, it redeems and restores. His truth cuts to the core of our struggles, bringing purpose to our pain, redemption from our past, and hope for our future.
Thank you Carrie, your post really ministered to me today. The last line was a very special blessing to me. It is good to remember that God knows our hurts and pains that we are feeling today and has brought us through the past by being there with us, whether we knew it then or not. I am so thankful for that. What an awesome God we serve.
I Praise Him!
Thank-You Renee! The Video is exactly what I needed to hear. Thoughts about things in my past have been surfacing for awhile now. I couldn’t understand why things (hurts, pain, etc) I haven’t thought about in years-because I stuffed all of that down deep- all of a sudden started just “popping” into my head. I realize now it is God leading me to face these issues and heal them with him so that I can go on and become all that He created me to be. I believe God lead me to this study not only to heal those hurts, but to overcome my insecurities and fears and to learn to really trust in Him and to develop a deeper relationship with Him.
This really resonated with me throughout. I too am finding that past hurts and dissapointments are causing me to be critical of my husband and trying to control the situation. As the message states this is just not working. It causes resentment in our marriage where rejoicing in each other should be. We have only been married a little over a year. Being 30 at the time we met, I had many years to mourn, but instead I ran from them and from God. To know there is hope is such a blessing, and like JJ, God has given me the husband He knew I needed. God bless you all this week.
I’ve heard a similar teaching that describes how Satan uses events from our past to oppress us in the now. Unfortunately he knows what has happened, even though we may not be able to identify what is bothering us….much like you mentioned with Aster. It takes the power of almighty God to break those unseen powers. I pray for all of us to have unseen bondages broken, that we may not be held captive by pain of the past…in Jesus mighty and precious name.
This is a great study and as usual God’s timing is perfect! Joanne, thank you for recognizing that “even if we can’t identify” god knows….A timeline sounds so stressful to me because I remember so little of my childhood. I know of little bits and pieces and thank God I went through some intense counseling a few years ago and in those memories Jesus is now there because of the places the Counselor had me go. He worked with me in replacing those times (in the dark closet, crying on the bus to school as a child while children laughed at me) with Jesus right there with me so that is what I see now instead of the fear and darkness i felt. But really, I don’t remember much. It wasn’t good, I know that, I know of my parents alcoholism, the violent outburst were there, the infidelity of my mother, my crying dad…But actual memories are not there. I know after years of Counseling, depression and anxiety, and more…that it was painful, i felt unloved and rejected and I wanted to fix it all. But god was there!! Praise him! for so long I believed He wasn’t’ with me, he let me get hurt. I know better now. Doing the questions is just a reminder of it, so it is difficult, but I press on…In His love
I too went to intense counseling to deal with abuse that I suffered while a very young girl. It was called theophostic. I went into my memories that were causing me pain and I saw God there with me. I prayed for God to reveal himself. I prayed for God to help me forgive those that hurt me.And by doing those things I felt like I broke from my past. It was difficult to “go” there to the memory, but so necessary to free me to live in the present with healing. I can honestly say that I felt like a huge heavy burden was lifted and felt so free and so loved by God. It may be hard to do a timeline, but when I do one, although the memories are still there, there is no pain, no fear, only peace. It is hard to explain, except to say God healed me of those terrible events and I can share specific memories and not cry or feel anything. God is good, 100% good. He never causes us to go through these bad trials or lets us go alone. He is there to help us heal and love us. Psalms 34:18
Renee thank you for this message and for the messages throughout your book. Some of my past hurts have caused me to doubt myself in the area of my abilities to perform my job and to look toward career advancement with fear and doubt. Thank you so much for telling me that God does want to heal my past and take care of my future and he wants me to be confident in his love for me.
Renee, thank you for your honesty and vulnerability and faithfulness. I too have much to heal from and have stuffed it for over forty years. God wants to heal me and I have fought to not deal with it because of the pain. I also have a young adopted daughter internationallly that is struggling through much of your sweetness’s struggles. It has been so difficult to watch her struggle. But I know that if I don’t deal with my own past, which mirrors my daughter’s greatly, I cannot help her. The vulnerability is so difficult. Thank you for standing as an example and in the gap for the rest of us to show us the grace and miraculous love of our Heavenly Father to accept us, love us and heal us as we walk it out and beyond. God bless you abundantly, Renee and your family for sharing you with us.
Thank you Renee for this book and this study – it has come at a cucial point in my healing and growing process. I began this process by searching for peace a couple of years ago and God has walked me through my past hurts, disappointments and even sins and He allowed me to cry, heal and grow. As hard as it was it has been, I can truly say that it has been an amazing journey and I feel better than I have in…well….ever really! I found you through Lysa’s bible study, Made to Crave, which gave me a new outlook on my struggle with my weight/eating. Then I found your book and study and being guided to go to God for help with my confidence has taken my journey to whole new level! I never cease to be amazed at His impecable and perfect timing and wisdom! Learning to trust in His plan for me, understanding that I have lived with a very false sense of control, my whole life, and finally being able to relinquish that has finally brought me the peace that I have been so desparately seeking. Living in the past and trying to control everthing and everybody was exhausting and futile — His way is so much better!! So I would like to encourage those who are just starting this journey to pray for strength and courage and He will carry you through the process. Enjoy the journey because the end will be better than you can imagine! LOL and prayers to all…..
Thank you for sharing your journey and encouragements, Tish. God bless you.
Dear Renee,
As I read through your book a couple of months ago, I thought to myself how similar our stories are. My dad died when I was six so while I had some uncles in my life, it is not the same. My mom never remarried and so with only a high school education, she had to work minimum wage jobs all the rest of her life. She brought me up with the idea that I had to be strong and able to support myself in case something ever happened to me like what happened to her. When dating, I always was too possessive of the guys so most ended up just being friends. I finally met the guy that became my husband but like you, soon became critical and dissatisfied because he was somewhat independent minded and didn’t like being “trapped ” in a job and has gone from “good” job to self-employment several times. I was looking for security and stability. We have had some very rocky times and right now he is working in another state and we don’t get to see each other all that often. But, also like you, the Lord has given me Isaiah 43 and all that it promises. My pastor felt led to share that scripture with me one Sunday morning. Actually the date was 1/23/11. In that chapter, I feel that God has told me that He is going to restore my family to him and my marriage. There have been some really rough times in the last year, where I questioned if I was doing the right thing by holding on to something that seems all but dead. But God has really reassured me that if I am faithful, He will be faithful. Your book and then the videos are so much what I have needed for reassurance and for building up “A Confident Heart” in me. The world -and some of my church family – would support me if I decided to do different but I cannot disobey God in my marriage. I found your devotion and your prayer for husbands and have been praying that over my husband almost every day since I found it. I am also planning on doing a timeline because I know that my daddy’s death has not been the only factor in me being who I am. I am looking forward to getting rid of some strongholds that have been weighing me down for years. Thank you so much for sharing and encouraging us to seek our “confident hearts” in the Lord also.
When God speaks we cannot go wrong listening to Him alone Donna! YOU are right….if he said he’ll restore then watch and see – he will restore! Praise God for women like you. 🙂
Karen- Michigan
Thanks for sharing, Donna. He will you strength. Keep clinging to His truths!
this was a wonderful encouragement! i sure hope i can let go like i need to, please pray for it to be so, and thank you so much for your teaching and encouragement 🙂 this book is amazing.
I was just thinking how afraid I am of the timeline after watching the video and then I read the next paragraph and it addressed this very thing. For me it’s not the hurts of my past that are “the big ones” that scare me but the possibility of something being brought to my mind out of the darkness and into the light. I have worked through so much pain from my past and already brought so much to light by God’s grace in my life, but I know there is more to be done. At times I grow tired of all this “processing” and then I’m reminded of Isaiah 40:31, “but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”
In weakness, THEN I am strong. It’s all because of HIM. Blessings Sisters!
Thank you Shasta for the reminder of those verses. I get caught up in feeling that some the times this is a race, and the reminder is that it is a journey and it is the direction that my path is going not the speed. But that is one of the lessons/promises I believe God is working on in me is of perseverance. It’s easy to to give up many times, but good to carry on.
And Renee, the way you are presenting God’s promises in the Word is such a gift andI’m blessed for the timing and my heart being open to processing of this now. Going back to last week lesson one of my fears in sharing my testimony or faith with others is that doubt I’ll do it right. I don’t have the verses on the tip of my tongue, but it has been easier now to see where to look. Starting my own little references with the verses you use in the book and from here online Blessings to all Lou
Thank you, Lou and Shasta for those wonderfully timely reminders! This is a JOURNEY and we do have HOPE in the Lord!!! Yes, we grow weary and faint, but He will renew our strength!
This is a lonely journey for me right now; well, actually, as I’m working through the timeline, I’m seeing LOTS of lonely parts of the journey. ouch. Although in truth, God has been alongside me all the way, much of the time I just didn’t pay attention.
Yeah, Rene, lots of tears. Tears can be cleansing, though!
Here’s to the “light at the end of the tunnel” or actually the Light that guides the Way!
Blessings to you all, sisters in Christ. May He provide abundantly more than any of us can ask or imagine!
Awesome video! I love that God can restore our souls and make us whole again, when we think it’s impossible from the hurt we endured in the past. He is so amazing and His redeeming love is just waiting right there for us when we allow Him to take that hurt from us. The mistakes from my past (especially in college with excessive drinking and being vulnerable to males) have been wiped away and I’m not longer burdened with the guilt. I know that God has restored me and given me hope in His abundant life. Praise God!! Thank you, Renee, for this great bible study!! It has helped me immensely!
what an awesome video … Thank You Renee for posting it today! I just can not wait for my sisters to see it . I’m thanking GOD for you and yours at this very moment. Your work is inspiring many and many more will be inspired by the many. Your obedience to our FATHER is a blessing.
I hear you sister!!! I share with my friends revelations that I experience thru this who are not actually doing this study, so many will be blessed!! AWESOME!!!
I actually got to read today and watch your video. You look beautiful, btw!!
You quoted one of my favorite nuggets from the book in this video. Such a powerful statement about our pasts and our futures.
Blessings to you, sister! I pray for continued healing!
First of all I want to say What a Blessing you are to Adopt Such a Precious and Beautiful little child of God.And I am so Thankful your feeling better.I Love you Teachings this one touched my heart as all the ones I have been doing in your Book.Doubt will rob us of Gods Blessing it is like a poison if we consume it it will destroy us.i Always heard you doubt you will do without.I don’t want to be a Doubting Thomas.I want to be All God called me to be.I kicked doubt to the curb.The devil can only mess with our minds if we let him.He is the one that tries to steal our Joy Our Peace.I have really grown in the Lord more then ever.I know when the enemy tries to take my mind by putting negative thoughts in I just Quote Scripture Greater is He that is in Me then he that is of the world-If God be for me who can be against me-ST.MATTHEW5:1-12 Love these Scriptures.Praying for You and all the Women in this online study.God Bless you and your Family thank you forus to grow more Stronger in God and His Promises.
Thank You Renee for this book & what you are doing. It is helping me through a very tough time in my life. It is encouraging me in many ways. Keep up the great work. I love being able to hear your voice through the videos. It makes me feel like you are right there to talk too. Thank you so much. God Bless You!
Thank you for these videos, they are a great way to reinforce what we are learning and reading and really helps me to process the information in a way that puts it in my heart, not just my head. I have processed a lot of my past hurts before this study but there is always something for the Holy Spirit to bring up for me to surrender! LOL Ladies….be strong and courageous, for the Lord Your God is with you! This is good stuff!
So far this study has been very good, but I am finding it very difficult to keep up as my time at home is not my own, and I work FT outside the home. I took a chance, hoping that I could do this. Please pray that my circumstances will change to allow me to indulge my heart’s desire and need to not only read and study, but to really dig in to the lessons and His Word on a daily basis.
I absolutely know what you are saying. My life sounds the same. The only time that is my own is from 4:30 AM til the 3 year gets up, as I go to bed as soon as I put him down, sometimes at 8:30!! It is HARD, but so worth it when I do get time in the morning or on my lunch break. Praying that you will have just 5 minutes!
A 3 y/o….yikes! God bless you, sister, for staying the course! I certainly will lift prayers for you!
Thanks for being vulnerable with all of us, Renee. It has been a struggle for me, but God is showing me (even prior to this study) that I have been too strong and I need to show my weakness and deal with them. Only in my weakness can He show Himself mighty in my life. I’ve been in the way of may victories…and now, I’m allowing Him to move me out of the way!
Thank you for such an encouraging video Renee. You’r looking so good, praise God for His healing.You are so right, the thought of the timeline fills me with dread.
The chapter a week way to study, is a great way for things to sink in. If I was just reading your book I would be rushing through it and missing lots of what God has to say to me.
Blessings to all the ladies taking part in this where ever they are. I’m in the UK xxx
Today’s topic on “Finding Hope for My Future” is so timely because of what I am going through right now. I was involved in a car accident about nearly 3 years ago which resulted to a court case filed against me (Reckless Imprudence Resulting in Homicide). It was such a painful experience and my faith in Jesus was put to the test. By the grace of God, I’ve kept the faith and continually holding to His promises up to this day. It was the presence of God that keeps me going and although I have to face the “unknown” with regards to my court case, in my heart I know my life is in His Hands and my hope is in Him alone. Thank you for your encouragement through your book “A Confident Heart”. Although I don’t have a copy yet, I faithfully the topics thru your emails. Please pray from me especially on my upcoming court hearing on the 27th February. May the Lord be with me just as He had promised. God bless us all.
Angelina,
I can’t imagine your waiting. May God give you supernatural strength in your waiting and pain. May his truths come incredibly alive to you as you continually look at Him and His word!
Karen- Michigan
Angelina,
Bless you for sharing your experience. Cling to the hope you have in Jesus as you wait. My prayers are with you!
Valerie
Angelina,
I pray the God of hope fills you with all joy and peace as you trust in him. Your faith is an encouragement to all of us. Thank you.
AKingelina,
My heart goes out to all involved. A condo complex was built next to my house that is over one hundred years old. My house partially collapsed with my husband and I in it! It’s been in litigation three years now. It has been a long, confusing, trying and sometimes very dark journey. God is faithful though. Choose each day to seek God’s presence and help. I am amazed how God shows his presence and encouragement to me.
Blessings,
Mary Kay
Hi Angelina,
Wow, my heart goes out to you and your pain.You are an example of faith and trust in Our Lord. Thank you for sharing. I will pray for you and for your upcoming court case.
What touched me also was what you said, “although I have to face the unknown with regards to my court case, in my heart I know my life is in His Hands and my hope is in Him alone.” I face the unknown right now with regards to my marriage, because we are separated. As I lean heavily on my Lord, I know all my answers, help and hope come from Him alone. I will be praying for you.
Angelina, I want to share with you some scripture that is helping me go through my court cases process. For God’s Glory and Honor , He has already declared Victory in one of the cases. But what I am learning through this process is that it has brought me to a place where I needed God to help me. I needed to be weak in order to really cry out and depend on Him to really get to know HIm as my great “I AM”. I dont like the way I got to really know Him but Im sure glad it happened. If it never did I could not see how Real our God is.
Romans 8:33-35
33 Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. 34 Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. 35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?
Isaiah 54:17
17 no weapon forged against you will prevail,
and you will refute every tongue that accuses you.
This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD,
and this is their vindication from me,”
declares the LORD.
What an amazing testimony of faith you have Angelina! I have really been going “through the storm” of the unknown in my own life and reading hearing your strength through your words & the faith you have encourages me to “stay the course”. God bless you during this time, may He guide you and keep you. I know what the devil meant for your harm, God is using for His glory! God bless you today & always. May this test become your testimony!
Hello, I am also in the UK , so a little out of the timeline but this book is amazing and speaks a lot to my heart. I have been struggling to come to Christ for years now – forwards and backwards and never sure of what I believe. Yet books like A Confident Heart get to me and hit home. I have prayed and asked for faith and confirmation of faith, I have felt strong, then like a fraud ,worried sick that I am rejecting the Spirit and so on. I also lost a relationship with a Christian partner as a result of my fear and panic and nothing has ever pained me more in my life or made me feel more of a failure. I live daily with regret and a longing for him which never goes away but yet knowing nothing has changed in my life, so we still could not be together. He has also moved on and found someone new. This has all been incredibly hard to deal with so I guess I’m a bit dispirited and in need of God to really, really lift me up if he is there and show me how to go on and what to do. Thank you for this blog x