Have you ever wished you could know the difference between conviction and condemnation? Are you tired of feeling weighed down with guilt and shame?
If so, you’re not alone! I believe condemnation is one of our most common and crippling heart-struggles. And I’m determined to kick them to the curb! I hope you’ll join me.
In my Proverbs 31 Ministries devotion today, I share the major difference between condemnation and conviction.
Condemnation is usually a broad stroke of shame that sweeps across our thoughts with generalized statements about who we are in an insulting and accusing way. The tone of condemnation is always accusing, questioning, confusing and will leads to feelings of guilt and self-hatred.
Conviction is specific and won’t condemn us for who we are, but will be more focused on something we’ve done. The Holy Spirit’s conviction always includes wisdom and instruction to lead us towards resolution, not shame.
Condemnation focuses on the problem. Conviction offers a solution.
- Take a minute to write down the most frequent shaming, blaming or accusing thoughts you have that make you feel condemned.
- Using the contrasting examples between conviction and condemnation below, re-write the statement and replace your words of condemnation with convicting yet loving truths the Holy Spirit might say.
- Be sure to offer yourself forgiveness plus a solution that reflects God’s goal of restoration and His tone of grace.
Instead of the lie: “You’re such a failure as a [wife, mom, daughter, friend],” the Holy Spirit might say, “You were really critical the way you talked to _________. You need to say you’re sorry and ask forgiveness. Then say something to build them up instead of tearing them down.”
Instead of the accusing label: “You’re so hypocritical!” The Holy Spirit might say, “You judge others for gossiping, but you’re doing the same thing when you talk about your neighbor at work. Apologize for what you said today and share a few things that are positive about her.”
These are two steps to help us kick condemnation to the curb, and there’s more but….
** Due to technical roadblocks and major scheduling challenges, my “3 Ways to Kick Condemnation to the Curb” is not quite finalized. But no worries!! I’d LOVE to SEND it to YOU via EMAIL today this week. Just ENTER your EMAIL below!
Also, BE sure to ENTER my GIVEAWAY and SIGN UP for the FREE download of God’s Promises too!
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I am giving away 3 Summer Devotional Gift Packs!! Each one winner will receive my “Confident Heart 60-Day Devotional” book, a prayer journal and my “Don’t Throw Away Your Confidence” message on CD! Enter to WIN by simply clicking “SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS” below and let me know how I can best help you overcome guilt and condemnation, and if you want to join me in my quest to kick condemnation to the curb! #kc2tc
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This month have been one of struggles at every corner. But what have helped me it’s to know that i’m not the only one christian who is living through the same. To know that it’s not bad for me to feel the way i feel and that also it’s something that could be overcome, it’s reconforting. Thanks for sharing not only your personal struggles, but also to helping us with practical tips c:
I’ve struggled so much with this my whole life. I’m really looking forward to getting this devotional.
Condemnation and shaming seems to be a continual struggle – the I’m not good enough or I’m failing thoughts are sometimes almost paralyzing in a way. The contrast between condemnation and conviction is so stark that it should be something easily grasped and yet I slip back into the feelings of guilt so quickly some days! Clinging to the ‘there is therefore now no condemnation for those that are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh but after the Spirit’ of Romans 8:1 and realizing how your blog post today rings so true to what God wants me to understand right where I am!
I grew up in a household with an alcoholic father and a co-dependent mother. Guilt was how you lived in my house. I married an alcoholic, abusive man and stayed with him for 32 years…of course everything that went wrong was my fault. For 2 years after he divorced me, I would look in the mirror and call myself the names he had always called me. One day I saw this necklace that had a little peapod on it and the word “Princess”. I thought, that’s what I am because I’m God the King’s daughter. Every time I would start to call myself a name I would hold onto that necklace and tell myself “I’m a child of God”. Now you would think I had it made but the guilt for so many other things gets overwhelming at times. I didn’t think of it as Satan trying to convince me that I am unworthy. I don’t know what you can do for me more than you have with your words of encouragement. I will be asking for the 3 Ways to Kick Condemnation to the Curb message. Thank you for being a woman God is using to help people like me.
I have those condemning thoughts a lot, and they mess with the belief in my goodness. I want to kick Satan to the curb. I want to be able to discern effectively between conviction and condemnation. I want to be able to push away those condemning thoughts with strength in God’s words of love for me.
Yes! I am sometime so condemning. I best myself up over things I know I ought to let go. Especially things that have
hurt me or people that hurt me.
Lord Jesus, please help me to “let it go!” in Jesus name AMEN! Forgive me my sins and heal my broken heart. No more condemning, no more condemnation. The Lord sent not his son into the world to conemn us, so then why should we condemn ourselves?
I never realized until reading this encouragement that there was a difference
between condemnation and conviction. Now that my eyes have been opened, and my heart made aware I realize I have been cowering in condemnation abd lack of self worth most of my life. Any help to break free from this bondage would be grace in action. Thank you.
Your scenario today was like you were in my house watching. I am the mom of 4 children aging from 3 months up to 8 years old. I condemn myself a lot and feel like a failure most of the time. I find myself having to stop and pray and asking God to forgive me and asking my children or husband or whomever is involved to forgive me for losing my temper & patients. And each day God gives me the grace to continue on and is constantly working within me to make me stronger in Him where I know my worth in Him and don’t continue to constantly make these same mistakes
Thank you for being obedient to God and helping us (other women) understand the difference between the two. May God continue Bless you and use you for His glory!
It would truly be a blessing to win one of your giveaways.
Thanks for your insightful words! I struggle with guilt and condemnation through examples like yours. There are times when I have corrected my children or spoken to my husband in not-so-loving ways. In the heat of the moment, I only feel right and deserving. However, afterwards, the negative thoughts set in. I would like to learn to listen to the HS at those times and not Satan.
I so struggle with past sin issues that I can’t “make right” with individuals. Although I have confessed these sins to the Lord, I have no way to find people from over 40 years ago and the enemy keeps telling me unless I confess my wrong done to them (leave your gift at the altar) then I can’t be forgiven. At least I think it’s the enemy. Is it the enemy? Why would it keep coming up? Should I be trying to find people from 40 to 50 years ago and ask their forgiveness for offences??
Thank you Renee for the EXACT encouragement God knows I personally needed today!
I’m reminded of (and grateful for) the gift we have—The Holy Spirit indwelling us with loving conviction (those gentle whispers of loving correction) to draw us to repentance and restoration!
Renee, the best and most kind way you can help me overcome guilt and condemnation: I simply ask for the gift of prayer today—over my heart and mind—that in those moments in my life when I realize “Uh oh, I’ve just blown it again”—whether in my attitude or through an unkind word spoken to a family member—please will you pray that I will quickly be able to discern between the LIES of the Enemy and The Voice of Truth from the Holy Spirit. I look forward to being built up stronger in my faith in the days ahead as I learn and begin practicing 3 Ways to Kick Condemnation to the Curb (for good)!
And thank you for the chance to win one of your Summer Devotional Gift Packs! The CD message you plan to include in your give-away sounds like the perfect message I need to hear so that I can serve God more confidently, and thus effectively, as one who is called to write and speak for Him. (Dear Lord, please equip me with your confidence!) I look forward to possibly meeting you Renee at She Speaks in a few weeks!
Thank you for sharing the difference between condemnation and conviction. I often look back and feel “condemned” for how I raised my sons, what I said and did to family and to others. I SO appreciate you sharing of the Holy Spirit’s conviction – how freeing!
The past 1-1/2 years have been the most difficult. What confidence I had and my peace and joy are gone. The excitement I had in studying God’s Word is gone as well. I see myself only as a failure. I fear the future and see loneliness. Fear consumes me. I feel rejected and unwanted. I want so much to be loved.
although I have a wonderful husband, I regularly have thoughts of not being a good enough wife. After a little argument this past weekend, I have especially been feeling like a horrible wife. This devotional spoke right to my heart today. I appreciate you, your heart, and your prayers!
I love this I am so bad at condemning myself always feels condemned no matter what I do love your postings
God bless
I love your book! I think the devotional (and these other awesome materials!) would be a wonderful way to daily remind myself of my worth in God’s eyes. I struggle with anxiety/depression at times, and I’ve always had issues with self esteem. When I did “A Confident Heart” online Bible study with Proverbs 31 ministries, I really felt like a burden lifted from my mind! I went from a place of fear to a place of confidence in my Lord and His plan for me.
The thing that really helped me was the weekly Bible verses to memorize and map out (if I had time to map them!). So, if I had to tell you the best way you could help me, it would be a weekly email or printable Bible verse series that I could commit to memory (or at least write down and post in my car to look over on my daily commute!).
Thank you so much Renee for all you do!
I live with a contant reminder that I am always wrong. Reading today about the difference between condemnation and conviction was extremely helpful and eye opening. Not being good enough is Satan’s lies. Thank you for this post. I think this book #kc2tc would be a great benefit in helping me overcome listen to the lies. Thank you!
I have difficulty hearing God and knowing which path is the right path to take. Reading your devotions seem to help clear the water as to what God whats for me and it makes it easier to just learn and be peaceful and listen to God and know that it is Him.
I have such a problem with this. Thank you for sharing. I will need to pray daily for the discernment needed to only trust the convicting voice and then to act on it.
As a mom, I feel like my go-to reaction when my son “messes up” is to preach and heap guilt on him. I hate that he feels that way because I love him so. I am consciously working on how I say things to him, as well as not saying too much. Stop and pray before you speck, mama!