Have you ever wished you could know the difference between conviction and condemnation? Are you tired of feeling weighed down with guilt and shame?
If so, you’re not alone! I believe condemnation is one of our most common and crippling heart-struggles. And I’m determined to kick them to the curb! I hope you’ll join me.
In my Proverbs 31 Ministries devotion today, I share the major difference between condemnation and conviction.
Condemnation is usually a broad stroke of shame that sweeps across our thoughts with generalized statements about who we are in an insulting and accusing way. The tone of condemnation is always accusing, questioning, confusing and will leads to feelings of guilt and self-hatred.
Conviction is specific and won’t condemn us for who we are, but will be more focused on something we’ve done. The Holy Spirit’s conviction always includes wisdom and instruction to lead us towards resolution, not shame.
Condemnation focuses on the problem. Conviction offers a solution.
- Take a minute to write down the most frequent shaming, blaming or accusing thoughts you have that make you feel condemned.
- Using the contrasting examples between conviction and condemnation below, re-write the statement and replace your words of condemnation with convicting yet loving truths the Holy Spirit might say.
- Be sure to offer yourself forgiveness plus a solution that reflects God’s goal of restoration and His tone of grace.
Instead of the lie: “You’re such a failure as a [wife, mom, daughter, friend],” the Holy Spirit might say, “You were really critical the way you talked to _________. You need to say you’re sorry and ask forgiveness. Then say something to build them up instead of tearing them down.”
Instead of the accusing label: “You’re so hypocritical!” The Holy Spirit might say, “You judge others for gossiping, but you’re doing the same thing when you talk about your neighbor at work. Apologize for what you said today and share a few things that are positive about her.”
These are two steps to help us kick condemnation to the curb, and there’s more but….
** Due to technical roadblocks and major scheduling challenges, my “3 Ways to Kick Condemnation to the Curb” is not quite finalized. But no worries!! I’d LOVE to SEND it to YOU via EMAIL today this week. Just ENTER your EMAIL below!
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I am a 52 year old woman, with three grown children and in a second marriage. I have struggled with feelings of condemnation all my life…not being good enough, perfect enough as a child and dealing with rejection upon learning I was adopted. As a young adult and mother, I never felt good enough as a wife, or mother. Even now that my children are adults, one with children herself, I constantly feel as if I’ve failed them miserably as a mother, and that nothing I ever do will ever be right. I have had many years of counseling, and I am currently seeking Christian counseling. I am just now learning about the difference between condemnation and conviction, but could use all the help I can get.
Oh boy did I need to read this. I feel like a failure as a mom on an almost daily basis. Satan condemns me until I start to believe his lies. Then God reminds me of His Truth. Thank you Renee. This was so helpful to me.
Just keep doing what you’re doing!! You have helped me so much already!! I have read A Confident Heart and need to keep rereading parts! I would love the devotional!! 🙂 Thanks!
I am running a few days behind on my morning devotions and I know Satan is the cause. He even comes/works thru good people to do his work. Please pray for focus and time management for me.
Thanks.
This is an excellent reminder that we spend to much time letting the devil beat us up. Love your bible study, I am sure the devotional is awesome as well 2
Thank you for this specific topic. I struggle daily with this issue. At 44 years old I’m so tired of feeling like a failure. In the back of my mind I still fight off the question what glory does God get from seeing a family with an UNHEALTHY vicious cycle of defeat. Angry because of my childhood, angry because my parents are who they are, angry because the system failed me and never got Child protective services involved, angry because. Angry because I wasn’t white with long beautiful hair living in the suburbs with a man that actually was family oriented. Single parenting, 4 children, 3 baby daddies later, welfare recipient for at least 20 years living in public housing, 4 misdemeanors convictions. 1 felony conviction. Yes I feel like a failure. But for the last 7 years of my life I’ve been digging deep into God’s word and finding peace. But the struggle daily is still there. Sometimes I just cry at my desk when my boss points out I’ve done something wrong and it crushes me. Just when I think I had. My bubble gets busted. So thank you for your wisdom and resources
Thank you for this specific topic. I struggle daily with this issue. At 44 years old I’m so tired of feeling like a failure. In the back of my mind I still fight off the question what glory does God get from seeing a family with an UNHEALTHY vicious cycle of defeat. Angry because of my childhood, angry because my parents are who they are, angry because the system failed me and never got Child protective services involved, angry because. Angry because I wasn’t white with long beautiful hair living in the suburbs with a man that actually was family oriented. Single parenting, 4 children, 3 baby daddies later, welfare recipient for at least 20 years living in public housing, 4 misdameanors
Thank you for this devotional. Per usual, God delivered this to me right on time. This is something that I have been pondering, and you put the thoughts into words. I would love to be entered in the drawing, to help KC2TC! God bless.
Thank you for your devotional – I struggle with condemnation vs. convicts. your devotional was presented in a way that helped me see in a new way that gives freedom and peace in Him.
When I am faced with circumstances out of my control, I seem to want to shut down. As a result, I usually begin to feel like I can’t be the fun, loving, uplifting and motivating mother and wife I so desire to be. I had an argument with my husband over a silly parenting issue. I did not like how he nor I handled it, and then it exploded into something much bigger. I always feel so unloved by my husband in these moments and I so need love from God at these moments. My husband and I condemn myself for either what I say or do. I really need to feel convicted to think differently and respond differently so I can choose to forgive my husband and myself. Reading your devotional and others at Proverbs 31 really helps. Thank you
I really feel God presently has me on a journey of breaking free from patterns of wrong thinking, and these devotion alas are powerful in helping me turn my thoughts towards God. Thank you! And yes, I hope to join you.
Thank you, God, for speaking directly to my heart through Renee. I’ve been spending so much time feeling like a failure at being a Christian, a failure at praying the “right way”, a failure at being a Godly wife, not knowing God’s plan for my life, not knowing if I’m positively impacting my stepson. I realize now the accuser has been reigning in my heart and my spirit and that God is joy and peace! Thank you Father for loving conviction instead of condemnation.
I love this because I continue to struggle with shame and guilt even though I’m starting to recognize the difference between Satan’s attacks and the Holy Spirit’s guidance.
Thank you Renee!
I loved this because I’m just starting to notice the subtle difference between God conviction and the Devil’s condemnation in my life, but I still need to work on discerning it. Every time I fall back into an old habit I totally berate myself that I can never change, but that’s what the devil wants me to think. I can change, and I’ve been working on praising myself for the moments where I hold my tongue, don’t lose my temper and choose not to freak out. I think we all have to realize that change is always a slow process, but we can get there with God’s help!
I’m SO ready to KC2TC!!!