Today I want you to meet my sweet, funny, amazing friend, Rachel Wojnarowski. Her story is one of God’s redeeming grace and the choice she’s made to chase after His plans and hold onto His hope — with all that she has in her.
I grew up in a wonderful Christian home with fabulous Christian parents. We were faithful to church and I graduated from Christian school. I went on to Christian college and completed the circle by teaching in a Christian school. My future husband was a “preacher boy” and when we married, the plan was that he would take a youth pastor position wherever God led. Only after we married, he had serious doubts about his calling and stopped attending church all together.
After two years of marriage, a precious daughter was born to us via emergency c-section. She experienced oxygen deprivation and required resuscitation, but she lived. Three years after Taylor’s birth, I discovered that her father had been having an affair essentially four of the five years we were married. In spite of that great protective environment I’d always known, and being faithful to God’s house, sin had erupted my “perfect” life and my marriage to this man didn’t withstand. Bad choices were made by both parties and we divorced.
In spite of all the pain and loss of the “perfect” life, God brought a solid Christian man into my life and He has given us a wonderful story of grace and redemption. But in the midst of Matt and I falling in love, my dearest mom fell severely ill, diagnosed with a rare type of anemia. Two months later the diagnosis was changed to leukemia and she lived just six short months after that. Mom was the strongest, most faithful Christian I’ve ever personally known; she was my best friend.
During my divorce and my mom’s death, the discovery process for Taylor’s developmental delays became more intense. Doctors often blamed the delays on her lack of oxygen at birth. But in my heart, I knew there was more to her issues. Nine months after my mom’s death, the diagnosis for Taylor came through: MPSIIIB, a rare, genetic metabolic disorder which causes gradual neurological degeneration. The average life span is 10-15 years and there is no cure, or even a treatment.Upon receiving Taylor’s diagnosis, my walk with the Lord became intense. I did just what Renee talked about this week in chapter four. I asked all the why’s and the how’s. I wanted God to spill out His plan for my life in one day.
But through His Word, God has taught me that faith is not only a one-time decision; it’s an everyday decision.
Trusting His plan for your everyday life is equally as important as trusting Him for your eternal life.
While God has richly blessed Matt and me with a beautiful family and more blessings than we can count, Taylor’s disease has not changed. Every day is by faith, that God would have His will for her life and ours.
Each day we claim His promises and make the choice to run towards His plan.
Rachel, your story has changed me. Your journey of choosing hope through your past and into the present brought tears to my eyes. I’m inspired by your faith and your surrendered life. To be broken daily, like bread, held up (like loaves and fishes) as an offering of God’s of love and mercy. You my friend are beautiful – inside and out.
- Find out more about Rachel on her blog.
- Download Rachel’s FREEBIE 12 Bible Verses for When You Feel Like Giving Up
Connecting in Community: I’ve been reading your comments and praying for each of you by name. And I’m working on a way for us to connect next week via conference call – Lord willing!! I’m hoping it will be a way I can share my thoughts and answer questions you all are sharing and asking about here. For today, I’d love to know….
What is God speaking to your heart through Rachel’s story? Also, is there anything from the questions He’s given us for the end of Chapter 4 you’d want to share? Let’s connect here and talk about it. {If you are reading this via email, click here to return to my blog to share your heart.}
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Thank you for sharing your story. It is so awesome to hear others faith journey. I have a special needs daughter. She is 34 now and we were told she might make it to 12. God has been with us through it all and while I have done more than my share of asking why. I can see so many ways how God has been there and how my husband and I would not be who we are today without her. This study and the stories are such a blessing. Still a struggle to share and keep the faith. So often we just want to hide and not face the hard work of healing. Thanks for helping me heal.
The statement that stuck out at me the most was “But through His Word, God has taught me that faith is not only a one-time decision; it’s an everyday decision.” That is true…just so true. Something resonated in me when I read it. Like yes…yes it is an everyday decision.
As I was reading your story Rachel, and just hearing all the bad things that had happend to you, it’s heart breaking and devastating. But you were strong in your faith and you knew that YOU HAD to be strong in your walk with God in order to make it. It’s like I know that I need to be strong in my walk with God but to hear other people, who also have problems, just stand firm in their faith it’s inspiring.
I will be praying for your daughter and the struggles that you will go through with her. She has already touched people’s lives and she doesn’t even know it. Her story and how it effects your family and the strength you have in the Lord is amazing. Thank you again for sharing.
I am in the midst of asking the why questions right now. Things are hard and I don’t understand why I (and my family) can’t catch a break. I like how Rachel said “But through His Word, God has taught me that faith is not only a one-time decision; it’s an everyday decision.” It just reminded me that I am not making faith an everyday decision. It’s a decision I make when a crisis comes up at that moment…not a decision I am making every day as I am walking through the crisis.
I am still a couple of chapters behind, but I am loving this online Bible study!!
It was a wonderful story…but I believe we all have similar heart aches and stories to be told….mine has not been a life of roses…but my faith in the Lord and my trust in Him has always been my peace….my father died in a horrific accident 7 months before I was born. My mom raised my 3 siblings and me without a helpmate. We all went to college, all received degrees and 3 of the 4 chose a life to live for the Lord….my one brother is struggling in his walk, but I believe scripture…train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he won’t depart from it…I waited until I was 44 to marry. I remained pure my whole life and never really met anyone I felt was compatible. I would like to say it’s happily ever after, but our marriage has had it’s struggles. Again….my hope in in Jesus…he is in control of our lives. I did get pregnant 1 month after marriage only to have a miscarriage, and another miscarriage after that. I have 3 step kids who my husband has full custody of them…this has caused stress in my life, but I do love them. We struggle in our marriage…my husband has problems with anger and control, but Jesus is the master of my heart and he bottles up our tears in heaven. He knows our sorrow and He was the man of sorrow.
I have to remember to run to my God daily with any problems – He is always with us, ready to listen and to strengthen us. He has the best plan for each of us! Trust Him no matter what! I know He is using my pain, trials and challenges in life to ‘grow’ me to look more like Jesus, and also will use it to encourage others. And the best of all – we are here on earth for a very short time, and we will live with our Awesome God forever! In joy, in peace and live real life to overflowing!
Whenever my past creeps up on me or I hear others put themselves down because of their past- I turn to the story of Paul- as Saul he hunted down & imprisoned or stoned Christians. When Jesus confronted him he turned around and became Paul. He doesn’t write about his past & his challenges of people coming up to him and reminding him who he was- but I’m sure his integrity was questioned. I picture him ignoring those people as that person he was no longer existed- he probably walked away from them. I take heart that if God can renew Saul & make him a new being- one of the greatest leaders & writers of the early church- He can renew me. Also I look at that who I was isn’t who I am now- I have to remind myself that I am renewed just as Paul was- just as others who were worse than I ever thought of being & they are today wonderful followers of Christ.
Sometimes the day to day struggle I lose myself in the forest & can’t see the trees. Thank you for sharing your story Rachel- I am strengthened by your example & strength-
“But through His Word, God has taught me that faith is not only a one-time decision; it’s an everyday decision.
Trusting His plan for your everyday life is equally as important as trusting Him for your eternal life.”
This is going on my wall- to remind me – along with your turn-to verses- that just because I read yesterday, just because I trusted yesterday- prayed yesterday- I need to do so again today. All relationships require daily effort- why should mine with God be different?
I’m so inspired by her story because I have a lot in common with her. Divorce has been difficult, but God has been faithful to me! I’m encouraged to know that all things work together for good! Thanks for sharing your testimony!
Thanks for sharing your story Rachel!
I have been putting off Chapter 4.. I have been trying so hard to forget no not forget. But, to let go of all the mistakes and all the hurt from my past. I did not grow up in a wonderful home or have a great childhood. Then, went on to marry at a young age from there had my 3 children. My Faith is what got me through. I knew that God always loved me and He was always there when I needed him the most. Which was most of the time. I divorced from an unhealthy relationship due to being abused. Both Mentally and Physically from living with an alcoholic. Had to leave without the children, started drinking and living the wild life. Not long after that was in and out of relationships alot like what is in this book. God speared me life after being a major car accident. In which, I should have died. In fact, I landed in front of a 5 foot cross. That was my sign to wake up and get me life together.. From then things change for me.. I have delt with the past and I now can let go. As a peaceful feeling just come over me. Right now, I am living a good life..
Thank you for writing this book.
God Bless
I know im late in reading and posting but I hope someone reads this. I have a hard time with this chapter because I do have alot of hurt. I am also having a hard time cause I am missing a small group setting. I want to share what God is doing and how he is doing things. I havent gotten any responses to my posts and I know that this is from the enemy but it makes me feel like I am not important.
Also ladies please pray for me. I have had constant headaches for two weeks. The only thing that gives me any kind of relief is pain killers. I went to the er last night and they did a ct scan and blood work that came back normal. But I have a history of bone spurs in my upper back and my left arm is going numb and then tingles. She wants me to go see a neurologist she believes I have a pinched nerve that if left untreated could cause permanent damage. I really need God to come through for me cause I have no insurance and very low income family.
I am only sharing this link to my website because I know this stuff works….. God bless you!
http://reneemoniz.myplexusproducts.com
Prayers to you! God is always listening and there for you — you are important and you are never alone! 🙂
Well, I have found it “difficult” to keep up with this study. I’ve been “cramming” the weekly assignments into Sunday evenings and I am less interactive during the week, other than reading the assigned chapter, but I know that it’s the negative energy trying to push me away from this positive and from what I am to learn.
My thoughts on this chapter, I am just amazed, Renee, at how much I relate to your story. I find myself reading the book and saying “been there, done that”. It’s easy to relate, but harder to make the changes. So Renee, thank you for writing this book and your encouraging words in this weeks “real time” video – it will help me keep pushing forward. I also keep reflecting on last weeks video of filling the jar with “Him and His water” and not all the other “stuff”. Thank you again!
Beverly, I know what you mean. I am just catching up on last week’s assignments, and I can really tell a difference in my attitude. When I pushed away the study because I didn’t have time, I fell back into my habit of having negative thoughts and doubts. If affects every aspect of my life, until I release it all to God. It is so hard to change. I want to be a more faithful Christian at the snap of a finger, but I’m learning that it’s a process that will take God’s time, not my time. When it’s in His time, it is all worth it!
What an inspiring story. It gives me so much hope for the troubles in my life. I love her 12 Bible verses for when you feel like giving up. That is a beautiful family.
God most definitely has a plan! And I am so blessed to be in this study and to have also gone to Women of Faith conference yesterday with a dear friend, in Mesa, AZ.
Thank you all for the blessing of your faithfulness and for sharing with us your lives. It’s your transparency and openness to sharing what you’ve been through and your honest feelings that is so encouraging to us all. God bless you for that!
I just wanted to also share this passage with you Daniel 2 verse 22. “He makes known secrets that are deep and hidden; he knows what is hidden in darkness, and light is all around him” I believe The Lord wanted me to come out of the darkness to clean the cowebs out of my closet in a sense to cleanse me of my past. My only regret is that I didn’t tell me husband first instead now so many others know so much about me because of my own doing. I believe at times in Romans 8 verse 28. God bless you all have a great week. Thank you so so much.
I agree with you Julie our burdens are our responsibility and I realize seeking God and His Word for guidance is the best way and I am committing myself to mediate and focus and not be a passive reader. I have read so many of what so many of you are and have gone through in your lives and I can relate to some. I too suppressed my past as if it never happed along with the bad choices I have made. I can relate to the woman at the well and also Mary Magdalene and there are times looking back at my past I felt even like Rehab but at age 46 my entire past from childhood up to 46 came floating up to the service and I had no control of it it was awful. When it all came to the surface I didn’t want my husband to know of it I was afraid of losing him I knew in m y heart I was not good enough for him since I had cheated on him once, inspite we were not married at the time we were living together. There was an urgency to tell others of what I suppressed all those years andI told so many ppeople I considered friends I called up so many places asking for prayer but I was guided my someone at the church I had just started attending to tell my husband everything about my past and aftr I told him and ask his forgiveness I felt relieved but I m not sure what was happening to him it was a lot I told him and the cheating part I believe hurt him really badly because he trusted me and never expected that from m e. now we are separated and I don’t know what is Gods will for our marriage.
wow! loved the post. I’m taking my time throught chapter four but I just loved this special guest. thanks!!! God is truly using your book and this online help to strengthen my walk with God!! thank you!!!
Thank you Rachel and Renee for the love and encouragement you have showered on all of us. WOW – hard to accept and then process the mighty impact our pains from the past have on our todays and tomorrows. This mighty challenge must be faced if we are to fully be all God desires and Praise God we can all take this journal together, offer support and understanding.
After reading chapter 4 and I also attended a Christian women’s conference this weekend I’m inspired but Gods love. He loves us so much no matter what we have done he loves us and has a plan for us as promised in his word. I also love the verses following Jeremiah 29:11-14 that when we seek God with all our heart we will find us and he will set us free! So amazing those words are refreshing. I have many pains in my past with never having a father and trying to fill that void with a man which resulted in teenage pregnancy and divorce in the long run.. But now as I look back I see how God has used all my “mistakes” to make me into the woman I am today. That he was always with me in my darkest hour when I felt alone he comforted me and I’m so grateful for that. I can be free as a woman today blessed with a new husband who is my souls mate and 3 amazing boys who my grandmother says are going to be pastors lol. Although I’m not perfect not will I ever be I know that God will always love me and will never leave me no matter what I do! Thanks for sharing all your stories ladies its such a inspiration to fellowship and share you never know who’s heart you touch with your words!! God bless! And I look forward to continuing in this journey together as sisters in Christ! And Renee I LOVE the prayers at the end of every chapter they truly touch my heart and are God breathed!! Love you all!
This blog makes me think of my story… How my life was going great – I was at college doing what I loved
– then I got sick and no one knew how or why (some doctors even said I was faking it for pills)
– diagnosed with a rare autoimmune disease called Still’s
– 2 years later it formed into Hodgkin’s lymphoma with an 85% cure rate
– went through 3 different chemo cycles and a bone marrow transplant and am still not cured.
– Developed GVHD just after getting back on my feet and hospitalized / bed rest for 4 months
– new treatment that is causing me severe neurological problems
Yes, there are days (sometimes a month at a time) where I lay in bed, or sit around and just ask God “why?” over and over again.
This isn’t just a past hurt I need to process… It’s a current hurt I am constantly trying to process.
That’s why Ch.4 speaks so strongly to me.
Like everyone else, this chapter was hard because of the timeline challenge. However, I prayed and God started revealing some hurts that He wants to heal. I got stuck in the hurts from kindergarten and had to call it a day. And kindergarten was one of the nicer parts of my childhood! God really wants to heal me but sometimes, it really is quite painful to recall some events. And in all fairness, while other people contributed to my pain, at the end of the day, my burdens are my responsibility. God wants to take them away so I won’t be a slave to them anymore. But I’m so used to carrying them, letting go is just as hard. I’m going to continue praying over this timeline; it may hurt but it cures. Praise God!
Renee thank you for all your prayers. I listened to your video. I was hurt by others and I also hurt loved
Ones in many ways. I try not to think of my hurts but I am overwhelmed with guilt over the hurt I have caused others. Its hard for me to trust and the truth is I don’t want to have hope when I can be disappointed. I basically live day trying to be content I pray and I spend time with the Lord but as I read and listen I second guess myself and ask I m being religious just going through routine where is my heart for my Savior and my love for Him do I just fo to church because I have to or need to? Or because I have a need. I honestly feel fake I have read chapters 1 & 2 I didn’t start 3 yet I did what u said hghlighted passages answered questions but after I was done with the chapters and read the passages in the bible and make notes I felt I completed it and I honestly don’t remember now all I read and wrote on those 2 chapters. what am I missing? Is something wrong with me.
Rachel, thank you so much for sharing with us. You have an amazing testimony of faith! You are so right when you say “But through His Word, God has taught me that faith is not only a one-time decision; it’s an everyday decision” because it is an everyday decision and sometimes I have found it is an hour to hour, moment to moment decision to put my faith in God and not let my mood reflect anything but the Fruits of the Spirit.
I finally finished chapter 4. Last year I went through Celebrate Recovery’s 12 step study to let go of hurts, hang ups and habits that I have carried for years. Though it had been a year since I took the class I still have never written my testimony and that is something that I am running from because I do not like getting in front of a group of people and speak. I need to complete that and through this year, God has really been calling me and working on me.
In question 6 we are asked about forgiveness. Forgiving others is very important, just because you forgive them doesn’t mean you need to allow them to be close enough to you to be able to hurt you again. My answer also includes that if you have difficulty forgiving, does it make it hard for you to fathom that God can forgive us for ALL of the wrongs we have done in our lives?
Chapter 4 was a great chapter and full of so much information that I think most of my pages are pink from highlighting. I had to complete an inventory last year during my CR course so I have done my timeline and it is so very healing and if you have someone you can share some of those things with, it is so freeing. I am really looking forward to Chapter 5 to learn how change my focus because even though I have let so much go, I still need to stop letting the enemy beat me up with low self esteem and self worth.
God bless you all and have a wonderful weekend!