Have you ever gotten that awful pit-in-your-stomach feeling after finding out you let someone down?
It felt like the wind had been knocked out of me as I read through an email from a client, sent to my manager and forwarded to me, describing how I had let some details fall through the cracks on a project.
A horrible sense of discouragement and embarrassment moved in for the kill.
In the past, I would have welcomed my uninvited critical thoughts to stay a while, resigned to the fact that I must be unable to do anything right!
But not this time; too many hurtful experiences had taught me to recognize failure as an opportune time for my opponent, the devil, to devour me with feelings of inadequacy and shame. This enemy is bent on making me believe that when my best isn’t good enough, I’m not good enough.
Fortunately, times of pain have also included hours of poring over God’s promises, gathering wisdom to deal with this unwelcome intruder. I have learned to be alert to the devil’s schemes and ready to stand against them. In 1 Peter 5:8-9, Peter tells us how:
“Keep your mind clear, and be alert. Your opponent the devil is prowling around like a roaring lion as he looks for someone to devour. Be firm in the faith and resist him, knowing that other believers throughout the world are going through the same kind of suffering” (1 Peter 5:8-9).
After reading the email and letting my thoughts run wild for a few minutes, I knew I had to clear my mind. I asked the Holy Spirit to help me un-clutter my thoughts with the clarity of truth from logistical, circumstantial and spiritual points of view….
Read the rest of this story and what happened in my Encouragement for Today on the Proverbs 31 Ministries blog. But BEFORE YOU go…
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I need this reminder today. Feelings of inadequacy & rejection can haunt me. Thankful that Jesus knows my heart.
I needed this today, I struggle with the need to please people and when I fail that negative voice tries to take over and it’s hard to block it out. Thank you for sharing your experiences and showing that God loves us no matter where we’re at in our journey. Have a blessed day!
I recently committed to making a big change in my life with the Lord’s help. My bible study group leader reminder me that when we state out loud our intentions, the devil will often try to throw us off course. This has been so helpful to me. Before I thought it was me and felt like a failure when I messed up. Now, I often tell the devil to get lost and get back on track. Thank you.
Thanks you for sharing. I often feel inadequate and need to be reminded that God is my source of peace.
I have a couple of things to share; the first is about me, personally. I was mentally & physically abused, and wild unfounded stories made up by the accuser to justify his actions. I got to a point of walking on eggshells, afraid to do the least tiny thing wrong, lest I get punished for something I didn’t deserve. After years of struggling, I finally handed it all over to God and let Him heal me. None of the situations I went through were my fault (aside from the staying with that person because of his kids), and I was worth so much more in God’s eyes. And I had so much more to offer to friends, family, strangers to encourage them and uplift them. I was able to walk away and start living the life God intended for me to live.
The second thing I want to share is a family situation…I was asked to help a relative make an important decision about a job & finances. The choice this person had to make was putting themselves in a happier situation and gifting me with their success, but losing some of their own financial security and alienating other family members. The other choice was to stay where they were and keep the peace and financial income, but feel bitter inside. I did not have an answer, other than a strong pull on my heart to pray about it. I asked this person if they had prayed, and the answer was no, they didn’t think of that first. We prayed separately, distanced by many miles, and in just a few minutes, we both had the same answer. God is good. Very good.
I have had those moments when I just couldn’t even breathe the weight of stuff hanging on me. I have to sit back and remember God is for me not against me. I lost a position I could handle because of letting others dictate how I felt about myself. I was a terrible people pleaser and these people were killing me!! It was a long road but I have learned a lot from My Jesus since then. He is the one who dictates my worth and to him I am worthy and loved and I am ok. I thank you for your ministry of Proverbs 31, I look forward to a good word and biblical guidance and have tried to pas on to others..
Thank you for this reminder and encouragement! I have to diligently stay on guard for Satan’s attacks on me in my mind daily. I did not struggle with this until I was in my 50’s. What a battle! But thanks be to God that through the Holy Spirit’s help he can be kept at bay.
So needed to hear this. I struggle daily with this. And my daughter so struggles with self worth and trying to find her way in life it scares me. I would love to receive a copy to share with her. God bless your ministry.
Every thing I do has to be perfect, in my eyes. Maybe not perfect but done a certain way. My husband can do a job right and get the same results but I think it’s wrong because he did the process different. I’m sure this is called Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder. This isn’t the best situation as I am a SAHM to a three year old boy, 2 year old girl and a 3 week old girl. God has been working on my control issues a lot, more so in the last few months. I’m up at 4 am feeding my youngest when I read this blog. It’s a reminder to me that God hasn’t forgot about me even when I feel like he has. That he is using others to speak to me. That he knew I would read this. Some days can be worse and my husband feels it but I know I’ve come a long way thanks to God.
I see my mistakes glaring with every typo on my blog… every misspoken word when I’m teaching. I have to constantly remind myself, “There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” Romans 8:1
thank you for this devo. I have read “The Confident Heart” book 3 times! Guess that shows how much I need it! My husband is leading us in a new direction with our Sunday night group and the challenge is to seek the leading of the Holy Spirit, even if we are some times misunderstood. A note of success: My daughter and I hosted a baby shower for a dear friend and the inviation was for 48 plus a blanket invitation to our church! we started with a lengthy food list and as time and money and energy progressed (or digressed) we had to decide NOT to make the cute little hand cutout cookies for favors. Although did not want to disappoint, it was the wise and right decision. Shower went very well without those cute little cookies that would have put me way over the edge! Great feeling to have made a wise decision. thanks
I went through a period where it felt like I was failing everyone around me, all the time. God really used that time to show me that His grace really is enough…
So needed to hear this today! Thank you!
I’m finding “perfection” trying to keep everyone happy, pleased etc…leads me to a complete loss of peace because I don’t always measure up..others disappointment in me leaves me feeling inadequate and replaceable..
I have tried to please some family members, only to be hurt. I have realized I cannot please everyone. In doing so, some will not have anything to do with me because I would not take sides! We are family and should stick together, Pray together. My family is split and yes for a good reason, but I got stuck in the middle. I am happy to know, that I really only need to please God!! I might have lost some family, but I will never lose God, my Father who is Faithful and never will leave us!!
I believe we are our own worst enemy sometimes…I could so identify with this post! From being raised in a dysfunctional home, since coming to Christ I used to fight almost a daily battle with the “Not Good Enough” monster. I found myself over achieving and over scheduling, looking to others for confirmation of my self worth instead of my creator. The good news is, I figured out a few years ago that God passionately loves me, just the way I am, and I don’t have to do everything perfectly anymore…what a joyous, liberating truth!
Thank you for your daily dose of inspiration! God bless you!
Oh, it is so easy to fall in the trap of feeling that you are not good enough when you are in the work world, sometimes when you feel that your family is let down – you can feel that you are not good enough.
Then, I have to take time apart from everything and spend time in His Word and let God speak to me through scripture and just being still to listen to God speak to you.
It is so true that Satan can use failure to keep us in bondage. Often we remember our wrongs, longer than anyone else does. We need to truly learn how to leave our confessions at the cross, and not pick them back up. Thank you!
Thank you Renee, I needed that today. Trying to remain steadfast in Him.
Recently as the enemy pressed down hard on me, my friend asked me to encapsulate in one phrase how I felt about myself. The phrase I came up with was “not good enough.” When I read your post this morning I thought of that discussion and how I desperately needed to feel good enough. I realized the only way I could do that is through the Lord and His love. Thank you for all you do to help keep us on the right track!
It is amazing to me how so many people, for whatever reason, find fault with anything that someone else does or doesn’t do.
I truly believe if there is a situation that needs commenting we should FIRST – pray, SECOND – give God time to answer and THIRD – comment. Not in reverse order!
I personally am very blessed and impressed with all that you are a part of….teaching, writing and speaking.
May God richly bless you now and always in every endeavor you do for Him.
Juanita Shelton