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“What a [woman] desires is unfailing love …” Proverbs 19:22a (NIV)
I had everything I wanted yet felt empty and confused.
My life was full of relationships and accomplishments I’d worked hard to gain, but none could fill or fulfill me.
Frustrated by my aching emptiness, tears streamed down my face as I thought about the guy I dated through high school and college. Our future plans had crumbled under the pressure of me expecting him to be all I needed.
I had been crazy about him — a little too crazy.
Like the time a friend mentioned my ex-boyfriend was heading to our hometown for the weekend. We worked near each other, so Friday afternoon I parked by his office and waited for him to leave.
We both “happened” to be at the same fast food restaurant, at the same time and bumped into each other. After getting my order, I got in my car and followed behind him, hoping he’d see me, realize he couldn’t live without me and signal to pull over so we could talk.
Seriously, what was I thinking? As you can guess, he never stopped. I was hopeless and humiliated…
A few weeks later, I was taking a walk around my college campus. My eyes drifted to the buildings, dorms and other landmarks of memories. Suddenly my mind filled with a collage of faces, reminding me of my efforts to win the approval of advisors, friends and professors — hoping their affirmation could fill my emptiness.
Although I was graduating soon, had a few great job offers and achieved success in many ways, my heart still felt restless. And I couldn’t help but wonder: Why was all that I had never enough?
A thought rushed through my soul, stringing together two words I had never put next to each other. I sensed God answering me.
Renee, all you have ever wanted is unconditional love.
Unconditional love? I didn’t know there was such a thing. Then God whispered into my soul: You’ll never find the love you long for in anyone or anything but Me. I AM the unconditional love you’re looking for.
The thought of God loving me without any conditions was inconceivable, yet something deep in my soul told me it was true. I’d been looking for love that didn’t have to be earned. Love I didn’t have to fear losing.
Honestly, it was hard to see how God’s love could fill the emptiness in my heart. It took time, but I came to understand that God created me with that need for fulfillment so He could meet it.
Proverbs 19:22a, says, “What a person desires is unfailing love.”
The word “desire” comes from the Hebrew word ta’avah, which means: to greatly long for, deeply desire or crave. Interestingly, unfailing love is mentioned over 30 times in the Bible, and not once is it in reference to a person. It is only attributed to God.
Could it be that God gave us a desire for unfailing love, because He knew it could lead us back to Him?
If today’s post resonated with you, I hope you’ll ENTER TO WIN (This giveaway has ended, but I’d still love to hear from you!)
a copy of my new Confident Heart Devotional. I truly believe the stories and truths in it will change your life {like they have mine}!
Based on honest struggles we all have with comparison, self-doubt, fear of failing, and the life-changing lessons God’s taught me and ten other women, {whose stories are in the book} you will discover how to change the way you feel by changing the way you think – which will transform the way you live!
Expanding on what readers of my first book LOVED most: “When I say … God says …” statements, I’ve written 60 new devotions and new {WISGS} statements to equip you with a new a thought map and a promise – to live in every day!
ENTER TO WIN (This giveaway has ended, but I’d still love to hear from you!)
Share your thoughts in the comments below to WIN one of 5 copies of my A Confident Heart Devotional or a copy of The Five Love Languages: Singles Edition for you or a friend. Be sure to let us know which book you’d like to win!
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I would love to receive a free copy of A Confident Heart Devotional.
I would love to read your book about the 5 Love Languages. I’ve been going through a Bible Study called True Love with a group of girls I’ve been discipling. It has been such a blessing to see God’s true, unconditional, steadfast love manifested throughout the Scripture and I would like to delve further into this topic.
I would love to receive a copy of the devotional book A Confident Heart Devotional. The reason is this spoke right to my inner core just now as I read your summary. I have been praying since yesterday the most and today, but a lot even before that. I know the truth, but yet, I am right where you have described the person searching for unconditional love in other people and things! I try way to hard like walking on egg shells to please everyone, only to upset myself, make me resent them, hate feeling like I cannot be my true self or be loved for WHO I AM, not WHO I AM SUPPOSED TO BE according to their idea of who that would be! I can’t talked this anymore, and am sick to my stomach about it, and beg God to change me because the harder I try, the worse I make it, and the angrier I get! I even exploded on someone yesterday about it!! I know ONLY GOD CAN CHANGE ME if I let Him, and I am trying to let Him. I have been down this road too many times, only to be set free if it, and later on, fall right back in! I want to be healed nice and for all, TRULY FREE! Thank you.
As a single mom, I feel worthless and like a failure every day. I would love to win a copy of your confident heart devotional book, because I believe it would help me deal with these feelings daily. Thank you for writing this book! I desperately want and need a confident heart!
I would be so thrilled to “WIN” the book, The Five Love Languages. This is something I’ve been wanting to read and have had so many friends tell me that this book changed their perspective and opened their eyes to a new way of thinking. If I don’t “WIN”, this entry has definitely reminded me to look out for it next time I am looking for a good read.
Thank you!
I just currently bought the devotional. I am on day 4 & it has been a true blessing. I would love to win a copy of the confident heart devotional & give it as gift. I think people are more likely to read books when they are given as a gift. Well, at least now in days. Thank so much Renee for sharing some of your intimate thoughts. Love, Bea
I would love to win your devotional.Altho I am single, your thoughts hit my heart with a punch.
I would LOVE to win either book! Thank You! 🙂
I need to be reminded of this minute by minute in my life season right now.
Thank you for writing on the topic. I too read your Confident Heart book a couple of times, and I thought it was great- it explained a number of things to me that I’ve been wondering about and had no one to ask, and also offered me great new perspectives on things. Your stories also resonated with my life situations, but I am particularly happy that you’ve reminded us once again who should be our #1 Love and who should we focus on daily 🙂
I’d love to win either of the books…I am sure both will be very helpful to me.
I, too, had looked to others to fill the spot in my heart that was empty. I’d been a believer since I was 6 years old, yet there were times when the deepest part of my heart was still aching for something, someone, who would love me as me and not want me to be someone else. Even into my thirties I still did not trust that God was who I was looking for and that he had made me as me ON PURPOSE. It was ok to be me and not everyone else. It has been a great journey these past few years as I’ve come to give back to God the deepest parts of my heart, one piece at a time. He has been proving to me that he can be trusted. He will not leave, not matter what I do. He will always love me, even when I am insecure or angry for the wrong reasons. It’s been life-changing. I not longer cling to my husband for fear that he will leave. Now I rest in the fact that GOD will never leave. He is now my forever love.
I would love the Love Languages for singles book. I have many single friends and relatives I’d love to encourage in their journey. 🙂
I loved the devotional on praying for boys. Boys are often overlooked because we feel they are not the sensitive type, but the strong silent type. However, as future leaders, and even future husbands, they need our prayers all the more!
My grandchild Matthew is my gentle soul. I pray for him all the time. Now with this article I will be praying all the more for him and using scripture indicated in Thessalonians.
Also my son is now 43 and he desperately needs to be covered in this prayer as well.
Look forward to an article on praying for girls but in the meantime praying for all my grandchildren and children. Thank you! God Bless you!
I pray for my husband, along with my 14 month old grandson, my brother, and sons, husbands, and grandsons of friends.
Thank you for this opportunity. I am currently working on the CONFIDENT HEART DEVOTIONAL. It is so very good. If my name is chosen, I would like the devotional to give to my daughter. 🙂 God bless you!
YOung love is SO not really love .. We all have those infatuations and I tell my girls, don’t fall too quickly! HIgh School is a soap opera .. trapped in a little world only paying attention to what’s going on around them at that time and place .. There are so many people out there! Experience the world and let God guide you to who is right for you .. He has intended special men for my girls and I pray for those men daily ..
Thanks for that reminder. I would love your devotional!
Hi Renee thanks for all you do. I never thought I was a person with a confident problem until I read your devotional this morning. trying to manipulate the situation so this guy can see what he may be missiong out on sounds all to familar. I want my confidence to be in Christ whether I’m single or not and my confidence based on Christ aloneI hope to win one of your devotionals
This has hit me like a brick wall. I have had this realization of how much he loves me and it is just overwhelming. He is showing me through others in my life. His AMAZING GRACE!
I just finished reading and doing the P31 OBS for A Confident Heart. This us an area I struggle with and would love to win the devotional. The book has had a big impact in my life.
Love the daily devotionals that you and the others put up for us. This one for feb. 5, really hit home to me. Keep them coming. Thank you for all the encouragement.
Gloria