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“What a [woman] desires is unfailing love …” Proverbs 19:22a (NIV)
I had everything I wanted yet felt empty and confused.
My life was full of relationships and accomplishments I’d worked hard to gain, but none could fill or fulfill me.
Frustrated by my aching emptiness, tears streamed down my face as I thought about the guy I dated through high school and college. Our future plans had crumbled under the pressure of me expecting him to be all I needed.
I had been crazy about him — a little too crazy.
Like the time a friend mentioned my ex-boyfriend was heading to our hometown for the weekend. We worked near each other, so Friday afternoon I parked by his office and waited for him to leave.
We both “happened” to be at the same fast food restaurant, at the same time and bumped into each other. After getting my order, I got in my car and followed behind him, hoping he’d see me, realize he couldn’t live without me and signal to pull over so we could talk.
Seriously, what was I thinking? As you can guess, he never stopped. I was hopeless and humiliated…
A few weeks later, I was taking a walk around my college campus. My eyes drifted to the buildings, dorms and other landmarks of memories. Suddenly my mind filled with a collage of faces, reminding me of my efforts to win the approval of advisors, friends and professors — hoping their affirmation could fill my emptiness.
Although I was graduating soon, had a few great job offers and achieved success in many ways, my heart still felt restless. And I couldn’t help but wonder: Why was all that I had never enough?
A thought rushed through my soul, stringing together two words I had never put next to each other. I sensed God answering me.
Renee, all you have ever wanted is unconditional love.
Unconditional love? I didn’t know there was such a thing. Then God whispered into my soul: You’ll never find the love you long for in anyone or anything but Me. I AM the unconditional love you’re looking for.
The thought of God loving me without any conditions was inconceivable, yet something deep in my soul told me it was true. I’d been looking for love that didn’t have to be earned. Love I didn’t have to fear losing.
Honestly, it was hard to see how God’s love could fill the emptiness in my heart. It took time, but I came to understand that God created me with that need for fulfillment so He could meet it.
Proverbs 19:22a, says, “What a person desires is unfailing love.”
The word “desire” comes from the Hebrew word ta’avah, which means: to greatly long for, deeply desire or crave. Interestingly, unfailing love is mentioned over 30 times in the Bible, and not once is it in reference to a person. It is only attributed to God.
Could it be that God gave us a desire for unfailing love, because He knew it could lead us back to Him?
If today’s post resonated with you, I hope you’ll ENTER TO WIN (This giveaway has ended, but I’d still love to hear from you!)
a copy of my new Confident Heart Devotional. I truly believe the stories and truths in it will change your life {like they have mine}!
Based on honest struggles we all have with comparison, self-doubt, fear of failing, and the life-changing lessons God’s taught me and ten other women, {whose stories are in the book} you will discover how to change the way you feel by changing the way you think – which will transform the way you live!
Expanding on what readers of my first book LOVED most: “When I say … God says …” statements, I’ve written 60 new devotions and new {WISGS} statements to equip you with a new a thought map and a promise – to live in every day!
ENTER TO WIN (This giveaway has ended, but I’d still love to hear from you!)
Share your thoughts in the comments below to WIN one of 5 copies of my A Confident Heart Devotional or a copy of The Five Love Languages: Singles Edition for you or a friend. Be sure to let us know which book you’d like to win!
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I know He loves me but I have trouble living it. Doubt, negative thinking creeps in, depression overwhelms, and I bounce back and forth from doing ok to being hit by trial and sinking Way down and being discouraged rather then walking and believing truth.
wow, a lot of people search for unconditional love. I know my husband can’t give it, but yet I expect him to understand me. I only get the opposite, I think I have to give it, but really I can’t either. So, I guess all we can do is try the best we can, thanks for your help,and mostly God’s. Lisa
My whole life I have searched for this love, my heart has been broken and is aching to be filled. I have lost two babies with my husband and both times I trusted in God for the health of those babies and to protect them. Then God took them to heaven. I often wonder why, why did he take my babies, why did he take my dad, why have I had a rough life with all sorts of bad things happen. I feel like I have been constintly attacked by the Devil my whole life and all I have ever wanted was a little peace, and Gods will for my life and our children’s life. I also pray all the time to to hear from God for direction in life and I feel so alone. My husband has been deployed now for 11 months and I am searching for God and needing his love and guidance. This book sounds perfect for where I am at in my life. I would love a copy of this book, I feel like this book can reach so many people believers and non believers. Can’t wait to read it. God blessed you as a writer so you could reach out into the darkness and bring people close to him. What a wonderful gift to have!
I can so relate to Renee’s need and endless search for unconditional love. I’ve always felt like I just don’t quite measure up to anyone’s standards, my own, my husband’s, my family’s. My rational mind tells me that’s just not true, that I AM loved and AM approved of…but I just don’t FEEL that way about myself. God’s Word tells me “I’m accepted in the Beloved”….I hear and understand that, but my feelings don’t always match up to the truth. That’s where my faith comes in…I walk by faith that that’s truth, whether my feelings are in agreement or not. I would so enjoy Renee’s devotional. Thank you for sharing your life and Lord with me.
I need to read a Confident heart!! I’ve downloaded the devotional, but would like to read the book first. I have not read Love Languages yet either and would love to have the opportunity. Thank-you!
I thank GOD everyday for His unconditional and unfailing love. I can’t help but think of my daughter, along with many other young women, when I read this. They search for someone that will give them only what GOD can give them. I would love to win this book to give to my daughter.
Thanks for the reminder that God loves me no matter what. He is there to hold me when I fall and love me through the pain. He will always be there no matter what is happening in my life.
It’s so good to be reminded that the part of us that longs for and needs that unconditional love, can only be met by God because He designed us that way. Too often I desire/expect others to meet that need. I’ve got to get my focus and expectations in order. Thanks for the reminder.
Thank you so much for your story. I’m struggling with this right now. I lived for so long looking to my husband to fulfill all of my needs and in the process pushed him away. We have experienced infidelity in our marriage and are right now he is struggling with forgiveness. I know that God has a plan for us and our marriage, but my flesh makes it difficult to give everything to God and let him work out all of the hard things that were already taken care of on the cross. I want to have that deep relationship with God that supplies all my wants and needs and changes me from the inside out and in turn opens my husband eyes to the possibility of our marriage working. I think your devotional would be perfect as I need help and direction to lead me closer to God. Thank you again for your blog today.
I have been in places and situations where I have been desperately looking for love and approval. I grew up feeling I was never giving enough, in my past relationships I gave up everything to prove my love and hope I’d get some back. I have known about God’s unfailing and unconditional love but with the thought in the back of my mind that I’m not enough to deserve it. Your post today helped me realize that He is all I need, and that He calls me into His loving arms to tell me that He loves me no matter what.
Your story is similar to mine. I’ve sought relationships and put them up as idols which will make you crazy!!! I even put my marriage as an idol with expectations my husband couldn’t reach. He didn’t know my love language and I couldn’t ‘fix’ him. I’ve been learning through my divorce that I can’t control or fix things, only God can do that!!
Would love The Five Love Languages!
Wow, I finished A confident heart this week. Great reading and study. Currently working thru made to crave bible study. This book gives me scripture were I need to fill my empty spaces. I would love to win the devotional!
Being a college student, it is hard to remember this. I really needed to read this today! Thank you!
I am so excited that you have written a devotional the coincides with your book A Confident Heart. I am currently writing a book about the abuse I have endured in my life and how God has brought me through even when I was unaware of His love; He never left my side. I read your book last year and have liked you on FB so that I get your daily posts which often lift me up when I am feeling down about my life. I became a Christian several years ago and have had a hunger for God’s word but like many because of what I have been through have been unable to believe, truly believe that God loves me scars and all. I have a very abusive past and a life that Jerry Springer would be shocked to believe is true. Your book brought me great comfort. I have often told myself to take it off the shelf and re-read it so that I can feel that closeness again. I believe you devotional will be a great daily resource for those women who have suffered so much but may not know God’s unconditional love or where to look in the bible for the comfort they may need that particular day. God’s word is healing. Thank you for sharing your heart!
Would love to win the confident Heart… so I can pass along the love. Leading a study on praying and confidence in Him is what we all need. Thanks for your insites!
Renee, thank you times a million for your insight. This rocked me and helped me understand God’s unconditional love in a way I’ve never realized before. I would love to read more in your devotional!
I love this devotion for today! i struggle with this feeling of not enough all the time. From parents and now a spouse. while i was reading your message I asked myself how would i really learn how to let God be enough and then i saw your Confident Heart Devotional!!! I would love to win a copy!! Thank You!!
I would love the devotional book. We all need to be reinforced in our confidence in Jesus, who loves us all so deeply.
My first online bible study was the confident heart study back in October. It has completely changed my life!! So much so that I bought each of my friends a copy for Christmas and tell every girl to get this book!! I would love to have a daily devotional!! Love this book and so blessed to have had the opportunity to experience so much greatness!!
Thank you for your story, my story is different but the same in so many ways!! I pray God continued to transform and heal me. I am single so would love a copy of the five love languages!