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“What a [woman] desires is unfailing love …” Proverbs 19:22a (NIV)
I had everything I wanted yet felt empty and confused.
My life was full of relationships and accomplishments I’d worked hard to gain, but none could fill or fulfill me.
Frustrated by my aching emptiness, tears streamed down my face as I thought about the guy I dated through high school and college. Our future plans had crumbled under the pressure of me expecting him to be all I needed.
I had been crazy about him — a little too crazy.
Like the time a friend mentioned my ex-boyfriend was heading to our hometown for the weekend. We worked near each other, so Friday afternoon I parked by his office and waited for him to leave.
We both “happened” to be at the same fast food restaurant, at the same time and bumped into each other. After getting my order, I got in my car and followed behind him, hoping he’d see me, realize he couldn’t live without me and signal to pull over so we could talk.
Seriously, what was I thinking? As you can guess, he never stopped. I was hopeless and humiliated…
A few weeks later, I was taking a walk around my college campus. My eyes drifted to the buildings, dorms and other landmarks of memories. Suddenly my mind filled with a collage of faces, reminding me of my efforts to win the approval of advisors, friends and professors — hoping their affirmation could fill my emptiness.
Although I was graduating soon, had a few great job offers and achieved success in many ways, my heart still felt restless. And I couldn’t help but wonder: Why was all that I had never enough?
A thought rushed through my soul, stringing together two words I had never put next to each other. I sensed God answering me.
Renee, all you have ever wanted is unconditional love.
Unconditional love? I didn’t know there was such a thing. Then God whispered into my soul: You’ll never find the love you long for in anyone or anything but Me. I AM the unconditional love you’re looking for.
The thought of God loving me without any conditions was inconceivable, yet something deep in my soul told me it was true. I’d been looking for love that didn’t have to be earned. Love I didn’t have to fear losing.
Honestly, it was hard to see how God’s love could fill the emptiness in my heart. It took time, but I came to understand that God created me with that need for fulfillment so He could meet it.
Proverbs 19:22a, says, “What a person desires is unfailing love.”
The word “desire” comes from the Hebrew word ta’avah, which means: to greatly long for, deeply desire or crave. Interestingly, unfailing love is mentioned over 30 times in the Bible, and not once is it in reference to a person. It is only attributed to God.
Could it be that God gave us a desire for unfailing love, because He knew it could lead us back to Him?
If today’s post resonated with you, I hope you’ll ENTER TO WIN (This giveaway has ended, but I’d still love to hear from you!)
a copy of my new Confident Heart Devotional. I truly believe the stories and truths in it will change your life {like they have mine}!
Based on honest struggles we all have with comparison, self-doubt, fear of failing, and the life-changing lessons God’s taught me and ten other women, {whose stories are in the book} you will discover how to change the way you feel by changing the way you think – which will transform the way you live!
Expanding on what readers of my first book LOVED most: “When I say … God says …” statements, I’ve written 60 new devotions and new {WISGS} statements to equip you with a new a thought map and a promise – to live in every day!
ENTER TO WIN (This giveaway has ended, but I’d still love to hear from you!)
Share your thoughts in the comments below to WIN one of 5 copies of my A Confident Heart Devotional or a copy of The Five Love Languages: Singles Edition for you or a friend. Be sure to let us know which book you’d like to win!
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I would love to win a copy of the Confident Heart Devotional.
Hi Renee! Your book “A Confident Heart” was my very first OBS and I loved it! I learned so much more about myself and my relationship with Jesus! And have since shared the book with others. I would love to read the devotional as it would daily remind me of who I am in Christ! A daughter of God, uniquely and wonderfully made! Thanks for the opportunity! God bless!
Last year on Christmas Day my aunt gave me “A Confident Heart Devotional” and “A Confident Heart”. When I started reading “A Confident Heart” I knew this was God’s way of answering my prayer. I had been asking him to help me to let the pain of rejection from my past go so I can move forward. After reading the book my attitude about myself has changed and I thank God he used you to minister to a 22 year old like me. I’m still reading the devotional and it has ministered to me as well. I would like to win “The Five Languages of Love” for myself.
When I went through a divorce, I struggled. When I say I struggled, I mean I STRUGGLED. I was totally caught unaware. Looking back I can’t believe how I tried to change myself to be something he wanted and trying to fix what was wrong with me. This time was really hard on me because my dad had also left when I was younger. Because of these situations I have a hard time trusting. This impacts my walk with God daily. He is with me and I know he has done great things for me and my children. I know this, but it seems I continue to struggle with totally trusting Him. Please pray for me. I truly want to be the woman God wants me to be. I have just started the A Confident Heart study. Please pray I have the courage to complete the study. I feel like God keeps pulling me to this, and I believe He has something in this study for me.
Sometimes I feel like I’m the only one who thinks like this. But I know its just Satan’s attempt to make me feel bad. I do need more confidence in my life. I have really low self esteem. Ive never read this book. Sometimes I feel lost.
Either book would be appreciated.
Just trying to stay focused in this overwhelming journey. This devotional sounds like a great resource
I, too have felt that way. To tell the truth, I continue to off and on. With that said, I have discovered how important God is to me and I to Him. So…it would be great to win your book to help remind me that I am important and matter more to God and it’s okay if others cannot fill that hole within me.
I needed to hear this. I always jump into new relationships and lose myself and who I am as God’s child. I am trying to slowly learn to live myself. Thank you for sharing. If my name is picked I’d like your devotional.
Always enjoy your post!
It’s such a hard truth to accept that God could love me unconditionally when I don’t love myself. I get so frustrated when I have to correct my own children for the same things over and over and over; I feel like surely one of these days I’ll use up all the patience God has with me and He’ll be done, frustrated that I’m struggling with the same sin business over and over. I’d understand! I’m frustrated with me too!
I’d love to win the devotional.
Thanks for this post and for using your life to point others to Him. I too am a people pleaser and strive for everyone to like me…all I really need is His approval. Would love to have a copy of the devotional. Thanks for the opportunity.
As a current college student, I’ll be the first to admit, albeit somewhat abashedly, that I’ve spent the vast majority of my academic career doing this exact thing: time and time again, I’ve looked to other people—my friends, my family, my youth group leaders, and not to mention guys—to fill and fulfill me, only to be met with overwhelming disappointment. And each time I was met with disappointment, I would run to God and ask Why? Why are you allowing this to happen? Why can’t I find someone who will satisfy this craving, this desire? Is a {good friend/caring boyfriend/interested mentor} really so much to ask for?
It hadn’t occurred to me that the answer I was so desperately seeking was right in front of me. And I was utterly convinced that because I was involving God in my life, things like this weren’t supposed to happen. Isn’t this your will for me, God? Don’t you want this for me? I would ask, time and time again.
You see, I had a lot of knowledge about the Bible and about who God was, but putting my knowledge into practice was something else entirely. It hadn’t really occurred to me that merely involving God wasn’t enough: sure, I’d go through my daily devotions and spend time with Him regularly. But I wasn’t trusting him with everything—no, that special undertaking was reserved instead for my closest friends and family members; and I was setting them up to fail.
I’d love to tell you I’ve got it all together: that I’ve figured out the secret to consistently keeping God at the center of my life; that after countless misfires and failures, I’ve learned to trust him with everything.
But I haven’t. It takes practice. Lots and lots of practice.
I think that’s why this devotion had such an impact on my life today. It was such an incredible reminder of God’s UNFAILING love for me—for all of us.
God took the few minutes I spent reading through this devotion to speak to my heart: to show me that only He is enough, and to show me that he is using all of those failures—the times I’ve been let down, the times I’ve felt so lost and alone, the times I’ve felt hopeless—to draw me closer to him.
And the incredible thing is, God wants to reveal these things to us: he wants to show us that He is dependable, that His love truly is unfailing, and that when we finally trust Him with everything, He will not disappoint.
Malachi 3:10 (NLT) says, “’Bring all the tithes into the storehouse so there will be enough food in my Temple. If you do,’” says the Lord of Heaven’s Armies, “’I will open the windows of heaven for you. I will pour out a blessing so great you won’t have enough room to take it in! Try it! Put me to the test!’”
I loved the devotion today. I could really use this devotional book and the five love languages singles edition. I have been divorced for a few years and God has brought me through so much but that is one of my hardest things is to believe that there is true unconditional love. I am a born again christian but I still struggle with love.
And I couldn’t help but wonder: Why was all that I had never enough?
I’ve thought this so many times. I’m so thankful God has been speaking to my heart and helping me to learn that He is all that I need to fill me. His love truly is unfailing.
I love your writings. this one, on unconditional love, hit close to home. It took me years of struggling with loneliness also before I found God’s love and grace.
I would love to win “The Five Love Languages: Singles Edition” for my daughter who is a single mom with 3 children, (ages 14-8) after 17 years of marriage to a man who left (232 years ago) and no longer provides any support financially or emotionally to her or her children.
I am working my way through “A Confident Heart” and is is already helping me transform in so many ways. I would love to get the devotional as n additional resource. Thank you so much for your words Renee.
I loved this blog post. I think sometimes we get so caught up in pleasing those around us, we put our relationship with God on the back burner. What He has for us is eternal and yet we put our hope in things that will pass away. Thanks for the encouraging words! Also I would love the Confident Heart book if I get chosen for the giveaway. 🙂
I would love to win your “Confident Heart- Devotional” to give to my 17 year old daughter… She is struggling a whole lot right now, with her relationship with God, me her brother, basically everybody who loves her… She deals with SEVERE depression and with self-htarm a.k.a. cutting. She LOVES to read and I am hoping tht this book will help her to realize that unconditional love our God offers to us that she doesn’t have to “earn” it and all she has to do is accept the free gift He is yearning to give to her and that He is all she needs to help her out of the dark pit the enemy has convinced her to be in because of the lies that satan has filled her head with… So good luck to everyone…
I would love to win and read A Confident Heart. I’m always looking for ways to improve myself therefore making myself stronger so I can be there and help others too. My confidence has had it’s ups and downs over the years and I believe this book would be a great guide to help me become the strong and confident woman that I know I can be. 🙂