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Renee Swope

Encouraging and equipping moms to parent with God's grace and confidence.

Read An Excerpt: Chapter 1 & 2

Letting God Fill Our Empty Places

Oh how I am LOVING reading so much about each of you. Gosh I wish we could all meet!! What an amazing group of women of all ages and from all places God has gathered here in HIS name! Makes me just about burst with joy! And now, I’m so glad today is here. Some days my written words come easily. Other days I just have to show and tell you what’s on my heart. Today is  one of those days.

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{Are you a note-taker? If so, I created “Video Message Notes” in a PDF and in MSWord just for you. Even included blanks to fill in. 🙂

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Comments

  1. I have learned this lesson once in my life it seems then went back to the things of this world to fill me up. Praying I can learn to look to Jesus for those things I need in my life, put him first. Thank you for doing this bible study online.

  2. Thank You Emily! I love analogies and visuals…very helpful in remembering always >”from the gifts to the giver”

  3. I have been a people-pleaser for as long as I can remember. I’m 40 and it’s still such an issue for me — crazy!! I do a very good job pretending everything is fine on the outside but if people only knew, they’d be shocked!

    This study has just been so incredible so far; uncovering truths I have always been aware of in my head, but not my heart. I had consciously stopped asking God to help me with my issues because I didn’t see much change. I like things to happen *now* but I’ve come to realize that God’s timing is waaaay different than mine 🙂

    Ever since starting this study — reading these truths, PRAYING these truths — I have had a heart change ALREADY! I feel more at ease. I don’t *react* in my default when I don’t get the reaction I need from someone. I am asking God to satisfy my heart with is unfailing love and I can feel He is doing just that.

    This study, and particularly, chapter 2, is encouraging me to be filled with Living Water and not the temporary things of this world. I have a loooong way to go but I can feel God with me and I sense His joy as I take this journey with Him. So excited for the adventure!

    • Rachel, I will pray for you as I pray for myself, for I too have battled this issue for years. GOD IS ABLE… and will set us free for I know….HE is currently filing us with HIS ling water. I pray we will continue to seek the GIVER-the lover of our soul to satisfy our soul, and heal our wounds. May HE be the one that we long for, may he be enough I pray. I love you with the LOVE of the Lord. Stay strong, and thank you for your words of encouragement sister. I pray ‘God who have made known to you the path of life, will fill you with Joy in his presence , with eternal pleasure at his right hand’ (Ps 16:11)

      Tati

  6. I loved the demonstration on your video. Wow how I do at times try to fill my jar with “stuff” to feel satisfied, yet I never become satisfied! But when we do look to our Lord and Savior to fill that longing we are completely filled.. There was a time in my life that I really looked to my husband to fulfill my needs….but i felt that he never did. It caused great struggle in our marriage. Then I found myself taking it before The Lord asking what was I missing?? Through prayer and searching of the scriptures the Holy Spirit revealed to me that it was only Jesus who could meet my every need! Wow how that changed my life, my thoughts, my love, and my heart! He is all I need–Jesus Christ! I love my husband and am very thankful for him but in my Christian walk I have learned Jesus is the one I need to fill my life and His love will satisfy my longing!!

  7. I loved the visual! It really hit home with how we let things and not God feel us up! I spent the better part of my 20’s holding out my jar to have the “wrong places and faces” try to fill it up! Then I held it out to the Lord in the beginnings of my 30’s – The most joyful and peaceful time in my life! Even through the birth of my son I let my jar be filled by the Lord! In my mid 30’s I married (to great man!) but I TOOK my jar and held out to my husband and son to be filled and have not had the peace and fullfilment since! This is something that your video and visual showed me. I have to now take my jar and HOLD IT OUT THE LORD for fillment again! I am crying as I write this because I had not even relized that I did this! Thank-you!

  8. I appreciated that video very much. I do feel like my confidence has been so shaken because I have been putting a lot of value in what other people think about me or whether or not I perceive that they accept me. The problem with that, is that people are fickle and they disappoint us. They all have their own struggles and “stumble in many ways” as the Bible says, so this will always be a merry-go-round ride for me.

    Lord, help me see my value through your eyes and have confidence based on your truth. Amen

  10. “When we worship something or someone, we give them great worth in our lives and oftentimes we find our worth in them.” (Pg. 58) “We long for (their) approval because it gives us a sense of significance, but then we feel like we are only as valuable as our last accomplishment.” (Pg. 59)
    These verses have really hit me hard, and I thought I wouldn’t get much out of this study…oh, I was SO wrong and am thankful that I was! My job/position was eliminated a few months ago. I had worked for the company for 10 years, then quit to be a stay at home mom for 7 years, then finally accepted their offer to return – which ended up being 6 1/2 years. During the last 6 1/2 years I was always praised by senior management how instrumental, valuable and irreplaceable I was to the company, and how they appreciated the personal sacrifices I had made in working 60-70 hours/week for many years. It wasn’t until God closed the door on that job and in grieving its loss that I realized I had tangled up a huge majority of my identity and self-worth in that job and my accomplishments. I had lost my job, the source of my identity and self-worth, and wondered what I was going to do, who am I now? This bible study is well timed and I know He timed it! I realize now the mistake I made in putting my identity and worth into my job, making my daily walk with Him an occasional occurrence, and working late which prevented me from being home early to be the mother and wife He called me to be. I am now where He wants me to be – at home, focusing on my relationship with Him and my family, re-finding my identity and purpose in Him. I praise God that my identity and worth in Him NEVER changes!

  12. Renee, what an Amazing illustration of God’s unfailing love. We tend to allow so many things to superficially fill our lives; and God in His simplicity shows us that ‘stuff and things’ are only a placebo, and that only He is the Real Deal! Thank you again for reminding us all that the emptiness that we often feel and the ‘stuff’ that we resort to using to fill that void, are nothing compared to the joy and completeness we get… IN HIM! I am so loving this study!!

  13. Okay so let me sum up what God is showing me.
    1. Misplaced value – overvaluing or undervaluing whether on key relationships, things , achievements , ect…leads to the edge of the pit of hopelessness. The beginning of hopelessness which is what happens when we believe what Satan has said or others who we’ve given to much value said about us INSTEAD of believing what God has said about us.
    2. What are we giving worth to in our lives. Is this lining up with God’s economy or the worlds ( what does God say we should value)
    3. Worship (worth -ship), What do our thoughts reveal about what we are truly worshiping, What tapes do we play about what others have spoken int our lives.

    All these things lead to hoping in the wrong things. It’s misguided, false hope lead by idol worship. The Bible states that Hope deferred makes the heart sick.
    Lets look at our thoughts and hopes ….are they built on lies we have believed or on how God looks at us.
    God is the author of our mental health! I see how I have set up idols unknowingly, I have entanglements because I have given someone more value than they are to have and allowed them so speak into my life more than God. I’ve listened to the wrong voice/voices. So I have given the idol power over me…

    This is the beginning of taking all thoughts captive to God’s word. This is the beginning of sliding int the pit. I guess I’m wising up to Satan’s progressive plan. First satan distracts you ( how busy are we and what are we thinking about, or how hurt you are by someone- this is where he caught me) then our misplaced value/ worth of people and things causes hopelessness which leads to despair which leads to depression which leads to destruction. Satan wants to destroy us. That is his desire to convince us he has destroyed us. For as a man thinks so he is. Proverbs 23:7

    WOHOOO! You all can’t see it but I’m jumping for joy and for freedom sake. GLORY TO GOD! Greater is he that is in me (and You) than he that is in the world. Enlarge my steps under me Psalm 18:36

    • Hi W I felt my heart touched when reading this I want to copy this . May I In Christ Love

    • “God is the author of our mental health!”
      “Satan wants to destroy us. That is his desire to convince us he has destroyed us. For as a man thinks so he is. Proverbs 23:7”

      These 2 statements! Woo! Truth.

  14. Your video and message was awesome. I am searching for something to fill my heart. I am a Christian woman but lately have felt a burning hole in my heart. I cannot find a a comfortable place. I am so blessed with a nice home, loving husband, grown, successful children and a grandchild, but yet I yearn for something and desperately for peace. I keep wondering what I am searching for. I am grasping at everything and my mind races day and night. Thank you for your message as I search through all the tangled webs in my mind and heart. I know Jesus loves me more than I could ever imagine, but I don’t feel it. Thank you for your message today!

  15. Thank you so much, Renee, for sharing that beautiful message & lesson today. It speaks volumes to my heart (in the most simplictic way)! I am reassured that this time in my life, is meant to be just as it is ~ for the Lord is there with me and allowing me THIS TIME to reconnect w/ HIM. It’s a nice feeling (especially after you said it in your video) to fill the empty spaces (in my life). I have been given my blessings in my life and I’m continuing to be thankful for HIS LOVE everyday.
    Thank you again.
    Love & God’s blessings to you.

  16. Thank you Renee for this study. It is wonderful to be with you, these other women and God every day. God is so good that he gives us so many wonderful gifts to enjoy. I believe he wants us to enjoy our time on earth, with friends, family, meaningful jobs etc. It is when we take our eyes off God that these gifts become a replacement for God. When we turn off our hearts and only think with our minds, then we believe we can exist with only the gifts and not the giver. That’s when we feel empty. Again thank you for reminding us to be full of God’s love every day!

  17. It has taken so many years for me to understand this. It’s freeing to realize we don’t have to go after all these worldly things. Thanks

  18. I’m such a visual person and LOVED this video! Thank you so much for taking the time to give us a visual demonstration. God’s love is SO fulfilling and truly does leave us lacking nothing.

  19. This is a wonderful illustration. Thank you for being that vessel that God can work through to speak these truths into our hearts. I have forwarded this video to my dear friends and pray that they too find the value that I found in it as I watched. May God continue to bless your efforts in spreading His word… and may he abundantly fill each of our jars!

  20. Thank you, Renee, for this awesome reminder! Although i learned this long ago, i know that there are times still when I catch myself looking at the gifts rather than the Giver. Like most things, if we don’t make a conscious effort to look at the Giver it is too easy to look at and for the gifts so again, I thank you! Even now, I am asking our Giver to show me anything that I’ve hidden in my heart that shouldn’t be there!

    Many, many blessings to you and all of the women who are participating in this study! I am so glad I joined!

  21. Renee I am sitting here thinking about your video and your illustration and something very important came to me. I realized how important it was that you emptied your jar again before let God fill it. It is not enough that we just allow Him to seep into the places that are left empty around our lives, possessions, relationships. We have to fully let Him fill all of the space within us.

  22. I really liked the visual in today’s video teaching. Seeing the things put in the jar, representing how I try to fill up my heart with the approval of men, bosses, people, food (a big one for me), work, but no matter how full the jar is, there are still so many empty places. THEN when Living Water is poured in, it completely fills up the jar (my heart). Seeing this made it so helpful. That is what The Lord wants to do, and only He can fill me completely. A lightbulb experience!

  23. I love the video , and the illusttration of how we can not fill our hearts with things people and fill every place. We still have holes that sometimes seem so big that our hearts feel so empty. We have to empty our jar or our hearts and let God pour His spirit into us and we are totally satisfied with His unfailing love Our God os an awesome God

  25. Your video really spoke to me! For years I have fetl that there was something missing in my life. I was always wishing and praying for God to bring me someone to love and to whom I could give my love. God never provided this. I had relationships but never married. Four years ago my Mom fell ill and ultimately passed away. My Dad was in his late 80’s and could not live alone so I made a very difficult decision to move to Florida to take care of him. I was drawn to the church that my Mother had loved so much and I began going regularly. What a sense of peace and love I have felt since I began attending. What I realized was that God did bring me towards someone to love and to whom I could love….God filled my life with love, joy, peace and satisfaction that no other but HE could ever do.

  26. I went through a “valley” a short time ago, looking for someone to befriend, be a prayer partner, sharpen one another, etc. God is faithful & was working in my heart, gently reminding me that He is enough! He alone fills my deepest longing & was I going to choose to be satisfied in Him? Realizing I had invested in others and we would be friends, just not the intimate level I craved, it was then my heart knew (yada) God is All. Now, it seems to be a season where others are sharing their appreciation of how God has used me in their lives! What a huge gift to my heart. God knows when to allow a “dessert” experience so we will totally enjoy the riches of His living water. Thanks for reminding us of Who He is!

  27. Oh, Renee ~ Thank-you so much for this video. I am a very visual learner. I love the jar example. When you filled the jar with water ~ just like Jesus told Sam abt LIVING WATER ~ the water fills every place of that jar ~ and HIS living water fills every crack, crevice, hole, scar and tiny space in our hearts and lives. Your book and sharing have been a true light to me. I’ve walked with Jesus a l o n g time. However I have just been going thru a time of deep disappointment and heart-ache. This has been perfect for me to absorb at this time. I also truly believe in Gods’ time this will be life changing for someone very dear to me. Thank-you, thank-you, thank-you.

  28. Thank you Renee for this wonderful video (and the notes). This study is helping me to turn my thoughts to Christ and not my insecurities. Where you said some get tired and quit that is more like me. When I am in a group I tend to stay quiet because I feel what I have to say is never important enough for others to hear. Especially when I am mid sentence and they turn their attention elsewhere. They probably don’t mean anything by it but I have to work at not telling myself I am just dumb because I have done that most of my life and still feel that way sometimes. I feel like I am a not a deep thinker and by taking this study I am praying God will show me how to have the confidence I need.
    Thank you for doing this study and all that you have put into it for us.

    Staci I am with you too as for watching this video more times. I want this to sink deep into my heart now and forever

    • Hi Bonnie! I think you are wrong! You are a deep thinker and I read intently every word you said! Don’t ever think your thoughts are not important! You are a child of God! You have the mind of Christ! If someone turns their attention elsewhere while you are speaking, it’s their loss. They are missing out on a valuable message. Thanks for sharing. I’m praying God will bless you and keep you as you walk the path of this life with Him. Love you, dear sister.

  29. Thank you Renee. This message really blessed me. I have found myself really looking to my fiance to help me be confident. I see him as my protector and safe place. I am realizing that he is losing patience with me at times because he feels I should have this confidence internally. I am starting to see what he really means is I should be looking to God for my peace and confidence rather than to the “gifts”. I really appreciate you putting these thoughts into a visual representation. Your words and your actions are really blessing me and I pray that I can apply this to my life and start depending in the Giver rather than the gifts for my self-confidence and my peace. Thank you again for speaking what God has laid on your heart so that I can be blessed as well as the many others in this study who needed to hear it!

  30. It’s a hard lesson to learn for many and as one sister said, some of us have to learn it by losing those things we put too much hope in. Reading others’ posts made me realize something very important and that is, while I am learning to trust God to fill those empty places in MY life, many people that I encounter throughout my day are struggling and still looking for someone or something to fill them. God’s Spirit has reminded me to consider this, to have compassion for others…to reach out and share that love that fulfills and only comes from Him. Jesus, fill us up so that we will overflow and spill over to others around us, each and every day!

  31. Thank you so much for this message. I struggle with this and am discovering how empty I really am. I continue to look to my husband, children, parents, friends for them to give me worth. My husband and I have been separated by distance for a month now, he finally comes home next week, but my fears run wild….what is he doing, is he seeing someone, and on and on. I even dream about it. this is my third marriage and I have felt the pain of rejection so much I almost expect it! I need The Lord ‘s precious healing. I look forward to learning more.

  32. Going deep with the Lord, finding that he is the complete answers to everything. I have found that there is nothing without him.

  33. Sometimes it feels as though those who make food for consumption, put just enough flavoring to make you come back for more….and more….and more…..we NEVER feel satisfied – AND THAT’S WHAT THEY WANT!

    HOW MUCH MORE does the ONE who made us want us to come back to the Source of “FLAVORING” for us to attract other’s to Him!! And then, not only feel satisfied…..but be satisfied to the FULL…and be so excited about it that we want to GIVE to others….not keep taking more for ourselves.

    ONLY WITH GOD IS THAT POSSIBLE!!
    PRAISE BE TO THE LORD who knows our every thirst and every need
    and GIVES MORE THAN ENOUGH!!

    All of You is more than enough for
    All of me for every thirst and every need
    You satisfy me with Your love
    And all I have in You is more than enough

    You are my supply, my breath of life
    Still more awesome than I know
    You are my reward, worth living for
    Still more awesome than I know

    You’re my sacrifice of greatest price
    Still more awesome than I know
    You’re the coming King, You are everything
    Still more awesome than I know

    More than all I want, more than all I need
    You are more than enough for me
    More than all I know, more than all I can see
    You are more than enough

    • Pillar ~ thank-you for putting up this song ~ one of my favorite worship songs ~ perfect!!! 🙂

      • He always is singing over us and to our heart! May He bless you with the perfection of His Presence always!

    • Thank you Pillar for sharing this song and the link. It was a blessing and prayer for me just now as I watched it. How true this song is!! I have not always lived this truth, but I am getting there again through this study and people like you obeying God to share what He has you to share. Thank you.

  34. Ack. Sadly, the minute that you started talking, all I could think of is how perfect you look and remind me of the girls in my Christian ministry that seem absolutely dolled up and perfect and all put together. And that even when they do share their flaws and what not, they’re still beautiful because they seem to just glow with God’s grace. I know that everyone struggles with something and we can’t compare the worst of ourselves to the best of someone else, but it can be hard. I want to say my jar is typically filled up with “living water” but I just start puncturing holes in the jar itself when I compare myself to others and seem to not measure up – the living water is no longer good enough for me because I’m not as pretty/put together/awesome as someone else’s best. I guess it’s like eating – when you’ve been satisfied with your meal and it was great, dessert may look beautiful, ornate and great, but you have no want/need for it because you already feel so full in the amazing meal you’ve had and you don’t feel like you’re missing out on something. I guess. Thank you again for this video, it was great mental picture of what you talked about in Chapter 3!

    • I like your analogy of poking holes in your jar by comparing yourself to others. Comparisons can really steal our joy and destroy our confidence. It helps me to pray for those who I think are ‘perfect’ and God usually reminds me that those women are very human and have the same struggles that I do. It helps menot get too blinded by their appearance of perfection and look for the sister in Chist deep inside.

  35. What an amazing video. I can so relate to trying to find something and not particularly knowing what it is. That void/emptiness we feel. My journey has been one of constant fear, not feeling good enough, never feeling worthy enough, anxiety, etc. Though I have a wonderful husband, 3 grown daughters, a nice home, etc. I have always found myself wanting more to fill my cup. Assuredly the closer I have drawn to God, the more I realize I have all I need in His unfailing love. Life sometimes gets us down, things go wrong, people hurt us and the list goes on. There are times I have to really struggle to remind myself God loves me, He knows His Plans for me & I have to be willing to lean on Him, His love, His timing, not my own. I have struggled with panic/anxiety disorder for 15 years. So I have been or become very isolated over the years. When we get to much into ourselves, we think to much and the thoughts aren’t very positive. I’m continuously trying to find happiness somewhere. When my happiness can only be filled with God’s Love, His Acceptance, His Mercy, His Grace. Only He can fill that hole I feel and slowly I’m seeing that. When I first starting reading A Confident Heart, I felt as if Renee had taken my life and written about it. I’m blessed to be able to share in this group of wonderful women! Thank you so very much!

    • I agree that when we think too much about ourselves, the thoughts are not always positive. But adjusting our thoughts and attitudes to God makes a huge difference! Thanks for sharing and may you receive many blessings on this journey!

  36. I LOVED the example of the jar being filled. Seeing the actual image brings light to the real situation. Sometimes we don’t realize it until we see a visual image. Thank you for this! Such a great reminder!!!

  37. It is good to remind ourselves of these very thoughts frequently. I feel it is so easy for any good Christian to fall back into old habits of seeing our worth is from material things instead of the love of God. Thank you very much for the video because it hits home for me!

  38. I bet Sam would have never in her wildest dreams thought she would be an example for women over 2000 years later! Glory be to God!!

    • Julie – I Wow! I agree! In chapter 2 (pg 36) of Confident Heart, Renee talked about how, “Jesus could have chosen to be anywhere else that day, but instead He was there pursuing Sam” and then she goes on to explain how unlikely it would be for a Jew to go through Samaria. My immediate thought when I read that was how amazing it is that Jesus didn’t go out of his way that day just for Sam, but for EVERY WOMAN through time who suffers from self doubt, and needing to find true fulfillment and unconditional love!

  39. Isn’t it funny, that the message is so simple and so often (at least for me) we forget this important truth. Nothing in this world will ever fill us completely, and yet we continue to look for “things” and “people” to fill us when they just can’t. It is an important reminder for me as I struggle with this truth. thanks for sharing this message.

  40. Thank you so much for sharing your illustration! I can really relate to searching for things to fill the emptiness in my heart. I have been searching so long and so hard to be loved and accepted unconditionally, that fear has been keeping me from experiencing God’s unfailing love. I am praying and hoping that God will use this Bible study to break the chains of fear and to fill me with Him and His love that flows so abundantly.

  41. What a great video. I really appreciate the notes too. I am a note taker. Thank you for your heart and sharing. I often feel like something is missing and have no idea why, because God has been so good to me. I believe in Him and trust His promises. Thank you for this online study.

  42. Oh Renee, how true your remarks were in your video. If only we stop looking in all the wrong placing and start looking into God’s word and study what He has to say to us we will be confident.
    Through this study, so much of what we have already touched on is things we know – we just need to be reminded that we have a source to be and feel confident – that is is our LORD (Jehovah).
    Thank you, for the time you are giving to share this study and may you and everyone (including me) be
    touched in a special way to know that the LORD, will fill our empty “jar” of life.
    Bless you!

  45. This was such a powerful message. We so often surround ourselves with all the worldly things that seem so natural to have that we forget that we only need one thing to sustain us. That being the love of God. One of my pit falls is food. I love to cook and when things get tough, it is my comfort place. I am trying so hard to break this pattern. Thanks again for the words of encouragement.

  46. Awesome video, thank you Renee. I think I’m going to need to watch it a few more times and let it really sink in and let God show me those “things” in my life that I have looked to to “fill” me. Then…the task of making that shift from “things” to “God”. I’m sitting here wondering how that transition is going to take place, but I know that only God can show me that and I can’t wait until he does!

  49. Great reminder! I love seeing the illustration, it is a great way to remember it. It is so true too and we need to be reminded to keep this in check. I think I will share it with my 15 year old daughter too. Our children really need to learn this! I am bring my daughter to your conference at the end of this month in Tallahassee. Can’t wait!
    Blessings

  50. I LOVE this reminder that only our loving – unfailingly loving – father can fill all of our needs…all of our empty places. So often, we let “things” get in the way when all we truly need is Jesus!