There is a longing in the heart of every girl.
A longing to be wanted and pursued.
Each night when I pray for my beautiful girl, I want her to hear me thanking God for who she is and for the gift of being her mom! I want her to know she is wanted and valued. That I miss her when we’re not together. I want her to know she’s not a side-item on my very full plate, but she is my heart’s delight and dessert! And you know what? She’s thinks I’m pretty amazing too?
Well… at least for now.
But I’ve been a mommy before. And I know a day is coming when there will be competition for my girl’s attention.
More than me. More than her daddy. More than her big brothers. One day Aster is going to want a guy to want her, to pursue her, to choose her.
And when it happens, I don’t want to panic and wish I could do something to get her to stop chasing after some guy, hoping he’ll notice her. I want her to know…
She’s already been noticed.
She’s already captured Someone’s heart.
She’s already being pursued.
And even though Aster is only five and a half years old, I’m realizing that now is the time for me to start planting these truths in her heart. But it wasn’t until I read my friend Lynn Cowell’s new book “Magnetic: Becoming the Girl He Wants,“ that I realized I needed help to get started.
Lynn’s new book is for girls (and their moms) to walk alongside and help them discover how to become the best version of the beautiful girl God created her to be. There is so much I love about this message. And that is why I wanted to share with you an excerpt from Chapter One today {and I’ve got 3 copies to give away too!}:
“Why doesn’t he like me? I just couldn’t figure it out.
What is it about me that isn’t as attractive as her? Am I not as pretty? Am I too loud? Are my friends not cool enough? The questions gnawed at me, eating away at my confidence. He had liked me once,; surely I could get him to like me again. There had to be a way.
I was determined to find out what was wrong with me.
Back in my own “wish I were dating” days, my highs and lows depended on whether or not I saw him in the hall; my happiness was determined by whether or not he noticed me. The crush I had was crushing me.
I wish there had been someone who could have helped me…someone who could have helped me understand that the longing in my heart pointed not to my need for a guy, but to my deeper need for something, Someone, even greater.
How I wish I had known sooner that I was created to be loved perfectly and unconditionally, made to have my heart filled each and every day with love from the perfect Man – Jesus.
Then I could have spent my time, energy, and emotions, not on a guy I didn’t have, but on the One I did. I could have moved from obsessing over why I wasn’t wanted to becoming the type of girl a godly guy would want. Not just someone to date but someone he’d want to spend the rest of his life with.
I remember making the list, a gargantuan description of everything I was looking for in the guy I would marry one day. The more powerful list would have described the woman I wanted to become, the woman he couldn’t resist!
What would happen if you made the switch now? Shifted your focus off a guy and onto the Guy?
What if, together, we discovered an irresistible beauty deeper than designer clothes, jean sizes, and flaw-free skin? A confidence so attractive, nothing could cause us to lose it? A glamour simply magnetic?
In my quest to discover true beauty, I began to see gorgeous as much more than the face in my mirror. Gorgeous is not skin-deep but heart-deep, a beauty that develops as my heart discovers and returns True Love.
This beauty, this attractiveness, is found in the girl who has what I call “captivating characteristics”—what the Bible calls “the fruit of the Spirit.” These heart traits are described in Galatians 5:22–23: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.
These magnetic traits are the result, or fruit, of the girl who has given her entire life to Jesus. The girl who spends her emotional energy allowing Him to live His life through her.
But, you don’t have to burn yourself out trying to become perfect. These gorgeous qualities will show up as you spend time with God and He pours His perspective into you!
When you’re “planted” in God, He provides all you need to reach your full potential—to be the best you you can be!
And, instead of chasing after the guy running from you, you’re pursuing the One coming after you. In the process of seeking His heart, you’ll become the amazing individual He designed you to be, a girl who is irresistibly magnetic, beautiful inside and out!
ENTER TO WIN:
Packed with honesty, encouragement and perspective-changing Magnetic, truth by Lynn Cowell,(available at Amazon, B&N, CBD, everywhere books are sold), will empower girls and young woman to reach their fullest potential by focusing on becoming who God made them to be! A girl who reflects God’s love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. A girl who will attract the right type of guy one day: one who loves God with all his heart and who will cherish her!
CLICK “Share Your Thoughts” under this post and ENTER to WIN!
Lynn Cowell is a Proverbs 31 speaker and the author of several books including “Magnetic: Becoming the Girl He Wants”. Her passion is to empower wise women to raise wiser daughters. Her husband and their three children live in North Carolina where they love to hike, raft and enjoy anything that includes chocolate and peanut butter!
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My beautiful daughter is 21. She has dated, yet she struggles with her self; insecurity, worth & loveliness in Christ.
Her father & I have prayed for the man He desires for her. We tell her to know Jesus to become & believe who He made her to be.
I struggled with the same. As her mom I love her fiercely, yet God loves her best. I would live to give her this book & own a copy of my own!
I wish I had been taught that not only could I have a relationship with my Savior but that He wanted to have one with me. It’s not that I was specifically raised to believe it was how I dressed and acted that would result in “that guy” liking me but I wasn’t taught anything that didn’t show me that. (I hope what I mean is understood. It’s hard to put into words.)
I have two amazing daughters who are 11 & 8, and all I can pray and hope for, is that they continue to communicate with me throughout their growing years. Even when it is so embarrassing! I wished I would have had better communication with my own parents as an adolescent. I think it is so important that we allow our children, especially a girl, to know that she can talk with mom or dad no matter how embarrassing it could be. That we will be accepting and loving no matter what. To do that I do believe they need to grow up seeing mom as a vulnerable, yet strong woman. As well as hearing about how much God loves them, and sharing how important they are to us and such a gift from God. I do believe teaching and being a part of their communication is such key to a young woman being successful in giving her heart up cautiously to another human being other than God, mom and dad.
Wow, I would love to have a copy of this for my 13 year old daughter. I want her to know just how wanted and precious she is. I want her to be confident in who she God says she is and in His love and passion for her.
To know that my heart had already been spoken for….that there was One who had asked me to spend Eternity with Him before I was even created…that the one I should search for here on earth, knew his heart had already been spoken for also….to know how deep, how wide, how vast was our ONE TRUE LOVE!!
I still think I need to hear this encouragement and I’m 32. I have an almost 2 year old daughter who looks up to me to teach her how to be satisfied by THE Man instead of a man and I wish I had had this confidence as a teenager and honestly now. After almost 8 years of marriage I found out my husband was unfaithful and he is no longer living at home with my daughter and I. I pray that in spite of the choices those around her make, my daughter grows up to be the confident, self-assured, God-loving woman that I wish I could have been.
I want my daughter to value herself based on the knowledge that she is already valued and loved more than she will ever know by her creator and not on what anyone else thinks of her. Chasing the fantasies of the “if onlies” will never bring happiness or joy to any soul.
I am 26 and single, and all i want to be is a wife and mom, but God has kept me from marrying the wrong guy twice now, and it feels as though i am never going to meet “the one”, it seems as though everyone around me is getting married and having kids, but some of the best advice i have ever heard was from a friend, who told me once that “Love is not a competition”. 😉 And too often i compare myself with other’s,wether its their relationship or their talents or beauty, and now every time i catch myself playing the comparison game, i stop and remember that ‘love is not a competition”, and neither is the Christian life, I just want to focus on who God made me to be, and serving Him, and be all that i can for Him wether i ever get married or not :), because life isnt about me it’s about Him, and as long as our focus is in the right place that’s when we have true peace and joy…..no matter what stage of life we are in.
I am 57 & had no guidance from anyone, my mom was & still is a lost soul. I married 36 yrs ago for all the wrong reasons & so has my daughter for 11 long yrs. now. U now have a 3 yr. old GD I would love to save from this generational mistake. I think this book would be helpful to all 3 generations. I am the ONLY one saved in this mess & have been for 18 yrs. now.
Ooh… looks like a good one for me and my 13 year old daughter. 🙂 May I model what I long for her!
This would be a great book to read and discuss with Jr. High girls youth group as they are going through that “boy crazy” stage of life!
I wish I had known that God’s love for me would never change, regardless of the feelings of others around me, loved ones, friends, and especially boys. As a teenager in high school I used to tell my mom all I ever wanted to be was a wife and mom, but I worried about finding the right guy, and sometimes allowed my feelings and need for love and desire to be a wife and mom to get in the way of seeking God’s will for my life. I thank God for stopping me from making a huge mistake and bringing me together with my wonderful, godly husband who pushes me every day to seek the Lord. We now have a beautiful, sweet baby boy and I praise God for the wonderful blessings He’s given me! My friend, Lauren, is struggling right now, wondering when she will ever have a boyfriend, and I think this book would be a huge help for her! Thank you for your encouragement and wise words! God bless!
I wish I had fully grasped how much Jesus loved me just as I was and stopped trying to be all to everyone in hopes of being accepted. I pray my two daughters will full embrace God’s love and allow it to flow in and through them.
I wish I knew more about Jesus and his love for me when I was a teenager. As a teenager, I thought I was no one special unless a boy liked me. I wish I knew back then what I know now. Jesus is all you need and he will help me with all my needs. Now I need the help to instill this message into my daughter’s heart.
I wish I had a Godly mentor as a child to share with me Gods love and truth
My mother passed away when I was 12, so I did not have a mother/best friend in my life to help me through my teenage years. I did not have her to go to for advice on boyfriends, dating or other matters that a young girl needs adult female guidance with. I wish I could’ve had someone to helped me and mentored me during these crazy years. Someone to led me in the direction of seeking God’s help. Praying for God to send me the right mate instead of running wild looking for him. My son’s have a good Godly wife, that I am so proud of. But now we have the grandkids to go through all this with.
This melted my heart! Especially the picture of Aster & your words describing what you wanted for Aster. Love watching you live out those words as you love Aster well & as you love her deeply!
Psalms 46:5 NASB
God is in the midst of her, she will not be moved; God will help her when morning dawns.
God’s Word moves me to the place I need to be. When I am mentoring to my young college age, sisters in Christ, I point them to the Lord who made them and let Him minister to their souls. Jesus is the lover of our souls!❤️
As I look back to my teenage years, I wish I would’ve had the wisdom I have now…and even someone who would have spoke God’s truth into my life. I would have done things different if I would have known better. I don’t regret my past experience because it has made me the woman I am today and given me passion to share with young girls and young women what He has instilled in me. I am thankful for books like this because it is also what God has used to shape me and mold me into the woman He created me to be 🙂
It wasn’t until I had a true relationship with Him that I began to live out His beautiful truth for my life.
I wish I had known the Lord as I was growing up. I have always compared myself to others and at the time did not realize that is a sin. God is working to help me change. I raised a son and daughter and wish I had know this for her. Now I have two granddaughters and would love this book to help me encourage them and help them to know all they need is Jesus. That others especially a boy can not give them the desires of their hearts. Thank you and God bless