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Renee Swope

Encouraging and equipping moms to parent with God's grace and confidence.

Read An Excerpt: Chapter 1 & 2

When You Need A New Script

 

If there’s one thing that throws me into a ditch of self-doubt and discouragement, it’s when I act ugly with the ones I love. 

Today, I’ve asked my amazing friend Lysa, who is also president of Proverbs 31 Ministries, to share how “losing it” with her loved ones effects her. It’s something she talks about in her New York Times Best-selling book, Unglued,

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I’m sad because of the way I acted today. Disappointed in my lack of self-control. And the more I relive my emotionally driven tirade, the more my brain refuses sleep.

I have to figure this out. What is my problem? Why can’t I seem to control my reactions?

I stuff. I explode. And I don’t know how to get a handle on this. But God help me if I don’t get a handle on this. I will destroy the relationships I value most and weave into my life permanent threads of short-temperedness, shame, fear, and frustration.

Is that what I really want? Do I want my headstone to read, “Well, on the days she was nice she was really nice. But on the days she wasn’t, rest assured, hell hath no fury like the woman who lies beneath the ground right here”?

No. That’s not what I want. Not at all. I don’t want the script of my life to be written that way.

So, at 2:08 a.m., I vow to do better tomorrow. But better proves illusive and my vows wear thin in the face of daily annoyances and other unpleasant realities. Tears slip, and I’m worn out from trying. Always trying.

I feel broken. Unglued, actually. I have vowed to do better at 2:08 a.m. and 8:14 a.m. and 3:37 p.m. and 9:49 p.m. and many other minutes in between. So why aren’t things getting better? Why aren’t my reactions tamer?

I know what it’s like to praise God one minute and in the next minute yell and scream at my child—and then to feel both the burden of my destructive behavior and the shame of my powerlessness to stop it.

The emotional demands keep on coming. Unrelenting insecurity. Wondering if anyone appreciates me. Feeling tired, stressed, and hormonal.

 Feeling unglued is really all I’ve ever known. And I’m starting to wonder if maybe it’s all I’ll ever be.

Those were the defeating thoughts I couldn’t escape. Maybe you can relate. If you relate to my hurt, I pray you will also relate to my hope.

While unglued is all I’ve really known, I believe that with God’s help, today my life can be different. That’s my personal revelation of hope.

Today, I’d like to invite you to take the you the “Unglued Challenge” for the next 5 days {you can find out more below and enter Renee’s giveaway}. In my 5-days To Better Reactions challenge, you’ll find encouragement and a safe place to talk about our tendencies to stuff, explode, or react somewhere in between.

I am both a stuffer and an exploder. And I’ve experienced God’s tender mercies and grace given so many times it almost seems scandalous. How can our God be so patient? I don’t know. But He is.

Today, He’s offering us the fresh start our souls desperately need. Isaiah 41:13 promises He will help us. We can be different. A slate wiped clean. A page crisp-white. A chance to start rewriting the old scripts of past failures.

For me. For you. Together. We can do this.

Prayer: God, thank You that this is a new twenty-four hours. Today, I want to believe I can start writing a new script for my life. Help me to overcome the disbelief I have from my past failures. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Thought for the Day: While feeling unglued is all I’ve really known, today my life can be different.

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Today’ post is from Day 1 of Lysa TerKeurst’s 5-day Unglued Challenge that includes FREE devotions from Unglued- Making Wise Choices in the Midst of Raw Emotions. If you want to learn how to respond with no regrets by managing your tendencies to stuff, explode, or react somewhere in between get Unglued, for 25% OFF through Proverbs31 Ministries today. 

 THE UNGLUED GIVEAWAY
Just do ONE or ALL of the following:

For EACH thing you do, leave a different comment. You’ll be entered to win each time!

Purchase the book for 25% off {or any Unglued resource}

Sign up for the 5-day Challenge {see right sidebar}.

Share this post via email, Facebook or Twitter {see buttons below}

Watch Lysa TerKeurst on The Today Show {Yes, The Today SHOW! We’re so excited!!} She’ll be on Monday (9am segment) and Tues (10am segment) Eastern Standard Time.

Click “Share Your Thoughts” to tell me which ones you did and why you want to win!


Grand Prize Winner  will receive 2 books
+ 1 DVD curriculum and participants guide.
And I’ll give away 3 more books to 3 more winners!

Comments

  1. Love, love live you Ladies! I shared and will continue to because I am loving what I am hearing about from others who have read it! Wish we could afford it this year, but if not, then soon. Keep being amazing! Love watching your ministry grow. You make this look easy even though i know its far from. It’s a Banner Year 😉 keep at it!

  6. I signed up for the challenge. I cannot tell you how defeated I can feel some days! Definitely getting the book on iBook as well!

  8. I would love to win this book because I would like to give one to my friend so that both of us can conquer our “Unglued” moments together!!

  9. It’s the days that I try so hard and fail that get me. The sleepness nights, financial stresses, motherly and wifely duites, piled with everyday life wear me down to point that I feel like the world crashes around me. And I take it out on my family, and I hate it! I try harder to do better the next day but I feel like I make even bigger mistakes. Thank you Jesus for grace! I am in a season of learning what grace is and what it means to be forgiven.
    Thank you for your encouraging book! I would love to do a study with my MOPS group!

  10. Just today I met with a friend who was sharing her struggles with coming unglued with her daughter. And yes, I could relate since I do the same! Then reading this tonight, I know God is trying to get my attention. He is there to help me and give me strength and victory. I shared this link with my friend. I encouraged her to join the challenge. We can keep each other accountable. Thank you Lysa for being open and honest about your struggles.

  11. I am signing up for the study and also will purchase the book in the event I do not win a copy. Will share on Facebook as well. This book seems very noteworthy and a help in the way I react to negative situations (rather then respond in a godly way). Love, Kat

  15. I have joined the challenge and shared on facebook..As a TBI survivor, I have problems with controlling many emotions, and have tried to constantly keep them in check. So pleased with this new book and the challenge of many of God’s strong people in striving to be more of what He wants us to be…My prayer today is for us all to be the People of and For God in this day and hour…

  16. Wow I’m psyched. Signed up for the 5 day challenge. I clicked on the link that said “The Today Show” but couldn’t find any info on Lysa’s interview. It says 9am on Mon and 10am on Tues, but what time zone is that in?

  17. I signed up for the 5 day challenge because what Lysa describes is what I live on and off. I have days of good and then days of horrible. I stress and fear and then I yell and scream at my husband and kids. I want to win because I need to read this book and then I want to share it with some women in my church!

  18. Just yesterday I was at home with my kids & something happened where I blew up at them. Ended up going to church last night instead of this morning as I felt we all needed God at that moment. Looking forward to the helpful hints to diffuse my short circuit during troubled times. Thanks for letting me know I’m not alone in this. Hoping to glean much from the 5 day challenge. Will be DVR’ing the shows as I work during the day.

  23. I signed up for the challenge, bought the book last month….and hoping the you will have another “online”
    book study that I can participate in this time. Also planning to set up my dvr to record Lysa tomorrow and Tues so I won’t forget about it. Thanks!!!!

  24. I can identify with Lysa. I certainly would have had a sarcastic come-back if someone said to me, “Is it too much to ask for a clean towel?” However….in addition to Lysa’s book, a particular blog I came across might also help to understand what is going on behind the scenes. I found it informative and am passing it along.

    http://annaldavis.net/2012/10/30/through-arid-places-seek-and-destroy/

    When you look at it in terms of a virus, you can see how it spreads and who is the perpetrator. After all, satan just has to strike the match and we are ready kindling for a big fire. Anna Davis is doing a four part series on this that is well worth reading. Understanding it from this perspective also helps blow out the match!

  25. I just finished the Melissa Taylor’s book study of this book. It was AMAZING! I am on the 5 day challenge. If I won a book, I would LOVE to give it to someone who can’t afford it! <3

  26. I signed up for the 5 day challenge. I read the words and thought wow that sounds just like me. I try to hold in my anger but then after awhile it erupts just like a volcano. The guilt that follows is horrible but the knowledge of the pain that I’ve caused to the ones who received my “lava” is beyond horrific. It isn’t fair to them. I would love to find a way to chanel my emotions and concerns. That way I can use my words in a better way to help all of us grow without resentment or guilt. Through growth with God, He will be able to use us more and we will be able to allow His light to shine through us!

  34. I am doing this now, along with A Confident Heart. There are so many friends I’d like to gather and share with! I’m thinking we need to get a place and have a winter Bible Study.

  35. Here is what I posted on my Facebook page:

    “Love this verse! Renee Swope and her book A Confident Heart is a must read for women. I have not read Unglued-Making Wise Choises in the Midst of Raw Emotions by Lysa TerKeurst, but have done her 5-day challenge of how to manage our reactions when something “goes wrong”. The challenge was awesome!!!! Give it a try ladies!”

    I also put Lysa’s web address so that the 5-day challenge could be easily accessible to anyone who wanted to give it a try!

    I would love to have the book titled Unglued! I am a leader of a Bible Study and would love to read this book to see if it would be a good fit for my group. We used A Confident Heart as a Bible Study and thoroughly enjoyed it. That study changed our lives! It truly taught us to be confident in who we are and what we’ve been through as women. I’m hoping that Unglued may be another one of those books that helps us all continue to trust God in all areas of our lives as a wife, a mother, a friend, a daughter, an employee, a leader, a follower of Jesus, etc. Thank you again Renee for leading us to have confidence in ourselves as well as in God. Lysa’s book, Unglued, can only add more knowledge and growth, even if it’s just for me and not my Bible Study group. I would love to read it!!!!

  36. Id like to win so I can learn some ways to better control my emotions. Over the last month I have had many bad things happen and I haven’t done so well at managing those feelings and emotions. I have many important people in my life and they shouldn’t have to suffer my faults.

  37. I can’t figure out how to sign up for the challenge. The link takes me to a site to purchase the book instead.

  44. We have been reading your book in our small group, thank you for making me feel normal and showing the ways God helps us over come these. We do not have the video and this would be great addition to our study and I love to gift the books to some girlfriends. Blessings!

    • Thanks for posting this Jennie! It’s encouraging to know that I CAN feel normal & that are ways God can help us overcome these. It’s been this way for so long, I didn’t know these were possible.

  45. I just signed up for the challenge & day 1 is already in my email inbox! Great start to a Sunday morn!

    PS – the link above titled “sign up here” for the 5-day challenge takes you to a page to purchase Unglued resources, instead of enabling challenge sign-up. I found the right link after googling it.

  46. I just signed up for the 5 day challenge and would love to win a book to share with a friend who feels entirely unglued right now and could sure use some help. Besides her I could also use some help! It would be a great book to do a bible study with!

  47. I have the book and I am looking forward to reading it. I think my husband will enjoy it too. We both read Lysa Terkeurst’s “Made to Crave”. I already enjoyed the 5 days of emails as well! And I’m going to tape those Today shows so I can watch her. 2 more books and the videos would be cool – good for a small group to have a study together.

  48. LOL @ Jeanine…..I thought “surely, I’m the only one awake at this hour”!

    Anyway, I’d like to win because I can relate to ALL of the post above, especially “If there’s one thing that throws me into a ditch of self-doubt and discouragement, it’s when I act ugly with the ones I love.” It’s like Lysa knows my heart, portraying it via the post above.

    I am signing up for the challenge too!

    Wow, what an email opened so early in the morn!!! I love these Holy Spirit moments xoxo

  49. P. S. I just saw the segment titled “I am the boss of my emotions!” That’s another reason I would like to win, and also because it’s really only 5:35 AM and no one else is even awake yet!

  50. I signed up for the challenge. I would like to win because I think this would be a great study to do with the women’s group that I am in.