Do you ever wonder why you didn’t get the gift of confidence like others you know? I used to feel slighted by that. But over time I realized there was more to confidence than just being born with it.
Lasting confidence comes from knowing and believing that our value isn’t determined by our performance or competence. But that is not always easy to believe because we have an opponent who will do all he can to convince us otherwise.
Some avoid talking about the devil because they don’t want to give him too much attention. But I think it’s important that we realize we have an enemy. The Bible calls him the accuser of the brethren. Satan loves to accuse us and make us feel worthless so that we never become all that God created us to be!
One of the ways he works is by getting us to doubt ourselves. In my P31 devotion today, I shared how a few years ago I realized I was going along with the enemy’s schemes every time I’d do something wrong and then ask: What’s wrong with me?
A few years ago, it dawned on me that every time I asked, “What’s wrong with me?” I was actually telling myself something was wrong with me. Then I would try to figure out my elusive fault so I could change it or hide it. Do you ever do that?
It’s not what God wants us doing to ourselves, but Satan loves for us to focus on all that is wrong with us (real or perceived) so that we become consumed by self-doubt and condemnation as a result. Peter tells us what we need to do about him: “Keep your mind clear, and be alert. Your opponent the devil is prowling around like a roaring lion as he looks for someone to devour.” (1 Pet. 5:8, GW).
Keeping Our Minds Clear
Jesus says in John 14:26 that God has given us an Advocate, the Holy Spirit, to teach us everything and to remind us of all that Christ said. The Holy Spirit lives in us as believers, and He is great at helping us keep our minds clear. Let’s ask Him daily to clean out the clutter of insecurity, pride, and Satan’s lies in your thoughts and replace them with the clarity of Truth.
Staying Alert
We can stay alert by listening to our thoughts. If our thoughts are against us, then our feelings will be too. What we think determines how we feel, and our feelings often determine how we live.
Think –> Feel–> Live
However, with the power of the Holy Spirit and God’s Promises, we can ask Jesus to change the way we think, which will change the way we feel and eventually transform the way we live!
The next time you start having negative feelings about yourself, stop and ask the Holy Spirit to show you what you’re thinking that is making you feel that way. Then compare your thoughts about yourself, or the circumstances you are in, to God’s thoughts. Do they match? If not, find a promise in God’s Word to replace the lie that has filled your heart with self-critical thoughts For instance:
- When you feel defeated, focus on the truth that God says, “In all these things [you] are more than [a conqueror] through him who loved [you]…” (Rom. 8:37, NIV)
- When you feel worthless, focus on the truth that God says, “You are precious and honored in my sight, and . . . I love you.” (Isa. 43:4, NIV)
- When we feel inadequate, focus on the truth that God says, “’You are my witnesses,’ declares the Lord, ‘and my servant whom I have chosen, so that you may know and believe me and understand that I am he.’” (Isa. 43:10, NIV)
If we have Christ in us because of our faith in Him as our Savior, then we have God’s power and promises available to live with a confident heart!
* If this is an area of your life you sense God leading you to dig deeper into, more about this part of my journey and this topic are in chapter 6 of A Confident Heart,
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As part of a little celebrating we’re doing at my house, (see note below) we’re giving away 5 copies of A Confident Heart along Confident Heart Scripture stickies we’re having created this month!! Just leave your name or a comment to enter by clicking on “Share Your Thoughts” to let me know what God has you thinking about after reading this post, or my devotion. I’ll be reading your comments today and praying for you. It would be my honor to do that.
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Today my family and I are celebrating some “only God could do this” news we recently received…over 20,000 copies of A Confident Heart are in the hands of women around the US, and it’s now being published in Korean!! We’re totally blown away – that in the midst of my father’s passing, my daughter’s speech disorder diagnosis and my mom’s hospitalization all during my book release – God is doing immeasurable more than we could even imagine. I know part of it is women reading reviews and hearing from other women so I want to thank you for sharing those, too. JJ and I love reading the stories in the reviews and seeing what God is saying to your hearts through the words He poured through mine in each chapter!!
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Thank you so much for reaching out to women through this book and through your website. I keep telling myself that I need to get myself a copy of the book especially after reading all the devotions and reading some of the comments. I have been struggling and really questioning myself lately about whether or not I made the right decision a little over 7 years ago when I got married for the second time. My husband and stepson came as a package deal and now my stepson is entering the teenage phase and it seems we are struggling on discipline, respect and almost every issue. There have been days that I just want to walk away. I have moved quite a bit over the years as both my father and first husband were in the military and so when I got married for the 2nd time I had to move again, this time I am older and it’s been harder to adjust and make friends. What little confidence I had seems to have deteriorated even more. There are so many times I ask God why?, what would he have me to do?, and that he give me strength. I keep telling myself that I am God’s creation and everything that he created is good, but why do I feel so insecure all the time.
wonderful!
Thanks so much for the Scripture from Isaiah. It was exactly what I have been needing to hear.
Most people, the ones that are closest to me anyway, tend to disregard me when I talk about feeling less than confident in certain areas. They don’t understand that outgoing DOESN’T = confident. I really need encouragement just as much as anyone else, but sometimes feel I have to ask for it, which to me, pretty much invalidates it.
To be reminded that God has CHOSEN me to know and believe him, that was very precious. If the amazing God that created such awe-inspiring and intricate works of art in our world, chose to make himself available to me, then that is some deep-down encouragement!
Praise God for all that he is doing in your ministry!!
This is exactly what I was saying to myself, again, on my way home from class today. What is wrong with me, why am I always feeling sorry for myself? I am almost 53 and in the last year quit my job to change careers and am in school to be a Respiratory Therapist. I have 2 grown children and one 9 yr old still at home. I have enjoyed reading your 7 day doubt diet and have loved it. I am going to try and get a copy of your book because I feel it would really help me. I want so much to succeed and have God proud of me but I am always doubting myself and wanting to take the easy way out and give up. I will just keep praying!
These thoughts on being confident in Christ were just what I needed! So many times I “beat myself up” because of the mistakes, missteps and unintentional accidents. This type of self abuse and negative talk is from the enemy and can bring only condemnation and depression to me. My choice must be to focus on the Lord and His promises to overcome these attacks by the enemy of my spirit. Thank you for renewing my confidence in all that God can do in my spirit as I repent and trust in His promises.
I hope that a copy of your book will bring me more enlightment and encouragement.
Just yesterday I read something that said, “How’s that negative thinking working out for you?” God has really been working with me lately on my thought life. Almost every day I read something that points to the fact that “As a woman thinketh in her heart, so she is.” It is hard to give up a decades long habit, but with the help of the Holy Spirit, I have confidence that I will continue to be presented with reminders that will help me to rewire myself for positive thinking. Thanks for all you do.
I do blame myself when things go wrong. I think “it must be something I did”. Thanks for writing this!!
This is what I have been struggling with for a while now. Thank you for sharing and it is refreshing to hear from everyone who has posted- I am not alone.
Lord, please be with all of us that need you in such a big way. Please help us to have clarity, peace, and alertness. Amen
(I would also love to have a copy of this book)
Thank you for your devotions! I struggle with confidence and not thinking that I am good enough for certain things and i struggle with not loving how I look and care way too much about what others think of me. This is somethingi continually work on and pray about, but always seem to let the negative thoughts slip back into my mind.
God bless you,
Emily
I definitely have recommended this book to every woman I can. I put it as the second most important book for women to read (with the Bible being first). I have read it and reread and reread it myself. Thank you for writing it and sharing it with us.
I just love your posts and devotionals! I am currently in the Confident Heart online study and am loving it! I would love to win another copy of your book because I know exactly who I would give it to–my good friend, Kathy.
Thanks for your devotions Renee! I never realized how my thoughts could be so damaging.
Sometimes I catch myself dwelling on negative things & I quickly have to change my thoughts
to something more uplifting. It really makes a difference.
Blessings,
Janet W.
Thank you for shoring your wisdom and heart as you allow God to work in you and through you to encourage me(us).
I love your book Renee, and your devotionals and blog. A friend texted me last night and ask if I would pray for her 16 year old daughter for God to prick her heart and convict her to take every thought captive unto Him. Your book would be an incredible read, full of verse after verse for her to saturate her mind to fight the enemy.
Sweet Blessings to you and your family for your incredible ministry and for your heart for women and desire to show us how to draw closer to Him and gain the confidence we need to walk boldly into His throne room and fight those negative thoughts that we allow to defeat us. We want our Savior and Lord to have the victory over our thought life, not satan, the enemy of all lies.
Thank you for having this today. I have felt this way many times. I always assume that I have something wrong with me. I have felt like I couldn’t be confident because I do not have a college degree or a prestigious job, but I am slowly learning that my value is found in being a daughter of Christ. Nothing else really matters. So, now I do my job with an improved attitude-“as unto the Lord,” and I try to remember that because I am His, I am worth much more than I ever imagined. I really am enjoying your site and all your encouraging words. I would love to win your book, but if I don’t-I will have to buy it. THANKS!!!!!
Thank you for your wonderful words of encouragement! I needed them desperately today! I pray for God’s continued blessings on your work in women’s ministry. It is so helpful and comforting. Thank you!
Renee,
Thank you for the encouraging words today. I’m involved in a Life class at my church and we are reading a book which talks about this very subject and it is so relevant for me at this time in my life. Daily I struggle with balancing my family and work life and constantly I feel like a failure. God is working on me and I’m trusting in him to heal me from the constant negative self-talk in my life. Thank you for sharing from your heart.
I believe that God makes no mistake. This devotional was exactly what I needed today especially. I constantly struggle with self confidence. I am 26 yrs old. I am a single mom of a special needs child. I work fulltime and tend to my child at home. There’s no time left for me and I end up going straight to bed. I feel like I’ve lost my identity. I know that I am precious to God but I sometimes forget. Thank you for your words of truth.
Thank you for your honesty and openness. Feelings of inadequacy have been plaguing me and limiting me my whole life, but even more this past year. I am getting better, but today seems to be harder. I was just praying for God to guide me to one step closer to freedom — and there was your email! After reading it, I am realizing that I need to plan ahead — to each morning and throughout the day, pray for a godly focus and not just react to satan’s attacks, but to be prepared.
I especially thank you for the verses you give. I was just thinking — is this all there is? But then was reminded from Isaiah 43 that I am God’s chosen witness and He has a purpose!
thank you so much for your words today
i feel like you are true;y speaking from God
I don’t know how to believe his words when every thing around me screams the feelings of worthless ness I have.
Help me believe Gods words when all the worlds evidenve says otherwise
I am praying for all of us who struggle with this
Your devtion today hit home for me because I often ask my self what’s wrong with me. I have been single for awhile and i often ask God when is my turn and so often i here when you get your finances togther or when you have a nice attitude or when you can keep your house clean on a regular or some plethera of things which always leave me feeling less than and left out . I genrally felt they were request from God for me to be a better Christain. I am learning that its not true and i find myself not feeling like my mind set can change. This is a really struggle for me so i was encourged to her you say that it is the enemy diquesing his voice never thought about it like that just assumed i was A mess. Thanks for the devotional today God Bless