Fearful. Betrayed. Abandoned. Unloved. Unworthy. Unwanted.
These are a few words that defined Donna and cast shadows over her. Here’s Donna’s story…
***
Fearful. Betrayed. Abandoned. Unloved. Unworthy. Unwanted.
These were shadows from a past that would haunt me for years. A past that would hold me hostage and keep me from fully living in the light of God’s love.
Fearful as I watched a hot plate of spaghetti thrown across the kitchen. Fearful as I watched furniture crash against walls. Fearful as my dad fell to the ground a few feet from my mom after he’d swung at her and lost his balance.
Betrayed after my intoxicated father sat me on the back of a horse without a saddle or reins to hold, and then swiped the horse’s rear end. Betrayed as he laughed with his friends while I went sailing through the air and landed on a barb wired fence.
Abandoned and unwanted when my dad filed divorce papers and when I discovered he failed to even get my name and birthday correct on them. Abandoned each time my dad refused to pay child support. Unwanted as years went by without visits, phone calls, hugs, birthday gifts.
Unloved and unworthy when my dad broke promise after promise… to visit, to call, to show up for my high school graduation, to pay for college.
Fearful, betrayed, abandoned, unloved, unworthy, and unwanted. Words and emotions that I let define me and cast shadows over me … until July 2011.
Through several of my Pastor’s sermons and through a friend’s father passing away, I sensed God asking: “How would you feel and what would you do if your Dad were to die this very day?”
I had no answer. I didn’t even know or really even think I liked my dad, much less loved him. Fifteen years had gone by since I’d seen him.
Around that same time, God challenged me with two words: ACCEPT and CHOICE
I had a choice and I made it. Following God’s nudging, on July 1, 2011 I went to see my father and accepted him for who he is.
In doing so, for the first time ever, I was able to ACCEPT my past. God made it perfectly clear to me that I could not change my dad nor my past. My only job was to pray for my Dad. I cannot tell you the burden that lifted from my entire being on July 1st.
God took my acceptance one step further. He told me I had a CHOICE!
A choice to believe that He is who He says He is. A choice to believe His promises; a choice to believe I was worth dying for; a choice to be filled with His joy; a choice to let Him be my Father, my Abba Daddy; a choice to live with a confident heart.
And it’s up to me to make those choices 24/7. Not just on Sunday. Not just at 9am when my day starts – but constantly make those choices. So I get up every morning and choose to believe that God is a Promise Keeper. I make the choice – to believe He loves me like no other can nor will, to pray for my Dad, to let go of the anger. I choose to live in the Light of Jesus so I can have a the freedom and security of a confident heart.
There are days, even minutes, that I don’t make the right choices. But the good thing is as I get better and better at making those choices my rebound time gets shorter and shorter. I get quicker at turning back to the Light.
I’m praying for you today – that together we can turn towards and live in the Light of God’s love. That He’ll give us courage to make the choices He’s asking us to make and accept what He’s calling us to accept so that we can keep turning and growing.
Lord, thank You for Your promises. I thank You that You have called me out of the darkness and into Your light. Thank You for transforming my heart into a heart like Yours. In Jesus’ name. Amen.
Donna, sweet friend, thank you for boldly believing Jesus and walking in obedient trust of His calling on your life. Your story and your faith challenge and encourage me to listen for His voice and do the hard thing of believing Him when my feelings are demanding their way. I”m so grateful for the Light and the way you walk in Him!
Connecting in Community: What is God speaking to your heart as you read Donna’s story ? Or is there something in chapter 5 that resonated with a change, a choice or a place of acceptance God’s inviting you to? Let’s share here and/or some of the answers to our end of chapter questions this week. Whatever is on your heart.
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Thank you for sharing your story, Donna! It was encouraging to read it. These are the words that describe my life: unloved, rejected, abandoned, fearful, unworthy and ashamed. Fearful, unloved and abandoned by my mother. I never had a Dad – my parents never got married or even lived together. I never knew who my Dad was. My Mom liked to have freedoms to enjoy her life, she rarely did anything with me. She was looking for love in all the wrong places. She had a problem with drinking, and lashed out at me in anger for not getting perfect grades or not doing . I tried so hard to please her but I felt I was never good enough for her. She never said to me that she loved me. When I went to college I began to look for love in all the wrong places too. I found God shortly after i graduated from college and was hired by a christian organization. But I was such a new christian at the time that I still made poor choices. I was still looking for love and I got involved with a married man. Long story short, my christian organization found out, I got fired and felt rejected, ashamed and unworthy. It took me a long time to pick up the pieces of my broken life. I was thankful for a good christian couple who took me under their wing and loved me just the way I was. It was God’s way to save my life. I am married now to a wonderful christian man and we have two wonderful children. Even though I know that I am loved by my husband, the shadows of my past still haunt me, they still hold me hostage. Now I have all kinds of health issues. I am ashamed of my past, I am fearful of all the anxieties that I have now. Donna, your words spoke to me. I know I can’t change my past, but I can accept it, I can forgive and i can pray for all the people that hurt me. I also have a choice to believe that He is who He says He is. I can believe His promises, because all those promises in the Bible are for me, not just for other people. Thank you for sharing your story!
Natasha, you have in common with me, I could related with you of ur sharing. My mom divorced with my dad when I was about two yrs old. Wasn’t aware of my hearing loss until about 3 yrs old. I grew up with mom who too busy with herself and left out many times. I first learned to do A B C, writing, communcate thru sign lanuage by the time I was about 5 when went to deaf school for first time. I struggle with fears, abandoned, unworthy like I’m not good enough even tried so hard to pleased mom and dad when he remarried different mother. Natasha, thank you for sharing. I pray for you to contuine cling on God’s love and embrace Him!
Natasha and Tracy,
I am so sorry that you both had to go through your experiences with your Moms. I can so relate to both of you and am thankful that God has drawn you both to this study and to God. Praying for you both as you turn the pages of Renee’s book and God’s word. Praying that God will fill the both of you up with Himself and with His truths and promises and that He will give you both the strength that you need to believe that you were both worth dying for and that HE loves you like no other can or will. Keep turning the pages and I will be praying that God will reveal Himself in new and exciting ways to both of you. Blessings, Donna B.
Thank you Donna!
Thank you so much for sharing. I read all these posts and think how much we all have in common. Its all because we live in a fallen world, filled with fallen people who until they get translated by the Light of God keep falling down and pulling their next generation with them. I have been listening (and singing) a song called Restoration by David Brymer. God led me to that song a few months back when he started uprooting roots of bitterness that were growing in my heart. Then not long afterwards “A confident heart” bible study came along. He truly is Restoring my heart, soul and mind. There are still some things that come into my mind that I don’t want to dwell on. I want to have complete peace about some situations and people when their names are brought up. But I come to Daddy God naked and unashamed and say Daddy God, I see another little root trying to grow, take care of it now before it gets too deep. And He does and will. I love Him so much. All I want to do is say THANK YOU JESUS!!!
Kim, thank you so much for what you have shared here. I relate to the bitterness and want to be like you and pray about that other little root trying to grow… 🙂 I have tears in my eyes as I am rereading it. I am going to check out the song you mentioned, too. God bless you richly! May you grow up into Him in every way.
Yes!! Thank you Jesus!! It’s by His grace and love for us that we have Him as our Hope and Future!
Here’s another song that I love too !!! Redeemed by Big Daddy Weave.
A beautiful story. I have been rejected so many times in my life — I know the feelings you have dealt with. I was never accepted as a child as being good enough in the eyes of my father. I was always blamed for everything that was never my fault. I know what you have been through and I can understand how you felt. It is hard to deal with pain and hurt and you are stronger for having had to deal with you. Praise the Lord you have come through the pain and the hurt that you have been through and you will be a stronger person for it. No one can take us out of his hand and he will lift you up and carry you through all the pain you have been through.
Nancy,
So blessed and thankful for His promise that He will never leave us or forsake us. I hold onto His promise in Jer 29:11 every day …. He is my hope and my future while also knowing that He requires action from me – that I will seek Him with my whole heart. Jer. 29:13. Praying for you and thank you for sharing your “me too” moment. Blessings, Donna B
Thanks for sharing Donna’s story. I had tears in my eyes as I read her story. My home life was not the best there was all kinds of abuse present and I could relate to her story. I thank God that he helped me forgive before my Dad passed away. This chapter has really hit home with me. I realize that my past has affected everything I have done through the years.
Tabitha,
Praising God for the gift of forgiveness with you! A friend shared the following verses with me this week.
“10 You are great and you do miracles.
Only you are God.
11 Lord, teach me what you want me to do,
and I will live by your truth.
Teach me to respect you completely.
12 Lord, my God, I will praise you with all my heart,
and I will honor your name forever.” (Psalm 86:10-12)
Praying for God to work one of His miracles as you move into the present and leave the past behind you. Blessings, Donna
Donna, thank you so much for sharing your story! God bless you! Listening to how you are freed from this really touched my heart and my mind. I too have “daddy issues”. My father and mother separated when I was 6 weeks old. I never really saw him growing up because he was too busy with his other family. Of the 18 years my parents were married, he had a girlfriend 15 of those. My mother passed away when I was 11 and I moved in with my dad and his parents. It wasn’t a huge transition because I spent the weekends with my grandparents, even though my father was absent. During this time he had a child with his girlfriend. He spent all his time being the perfect mate to this other woman and the perfect father to this child when he neglected his four kids and wife. I’m now 30 and married with my own life, but I still crave that daddy/ daughter relationship. We sort of have a relationship. I mean, we talk on the phone maybe twice a month and I will see him a few hours when I visit my hometown. Whenever we talk he always want to talk about his problems with the outside child’s mother and the child. I want to say, “serves you just right!”, but I know what’s isn’t godly. I thought I had forgiven him until I read your story. That little girl who wonder does daddy love me and why he doesn’t want to be with my mommy returned. Your story made me realize that I truly need to pray about this, accept the past, and make a choice to move forward.
I am actually returning to my hometown this week and I want to really talk to my dad. I want him to know that I forgive him and no apology needed. My dad is 73 and I don’t know how much time neither one of us have. It’s time I let go of these feelings.
Thank you so much Donna for being a blessing and inspiration to close this chapter of my life.
God bless you, and I’m praying for you!
Courtney,
I will be praying for you as you return home. Praying for God to fill you with his courage and boldness and that He will remove the fear that will be there as you approach and talk with your Dad. Praying for God to fill you with His strength and with His desire as you forgive your Dad. God wants us to live in a state of forgiveness and grace. Jesus died so that we might live in His love and in His forgiveness. Praying that God will direct your speech and your thoughts as you meet and talk with your Dad. Blessings, Donna B
Thanks, Donna!
Thank you Donna, for sharing your story. I hope I can learn from your example, and dispel those feelings that I have of being alone. Knowing others have also walked through the shadows i have makes me more hopeful that i will make there yet!
Shannon,
Just keep turning those pages to A Confident Heart and to your Bible. And praying .. always praying! Praying for God to fill you up with Himself and with his confidence so that you may grown closer to Him. He has an amazing plan for your life! Blessings, Donna
I really need this study. Chapter 5 made me cry many times. Over the years, I have realized how much I constantly compare myself with others. I used to always say “I’m not good enough.” “I’m not a good enough mom, wife, friend, etc.” I am always thinking that others are better than me. I thought that I had gotten through that until a few years ago. I started realizing that I wasn’t happy in church, and what I was doing AGAIN was comparing myself to everyone I knew there. It got so bad, that I had to leave that church and almost turned away from God. Since then, I’m trying to find who I am in God, and see the good qualities in myself. I have a long way to go. I feel like I don’t have any friends, because I think I push them away. I need to choose to turn to God during those insecure moments instead of trying to do it all on my own. Thank you so much for this study.
Gina,
God loves you like no other! Thank you for being so real and so honest with how you feel. I’ve been where you are and it’s a painful journey from that place to light. And yes, comparison is not good. Renee shares further in the book about how we compare our insides with the outsides of others. When in fact, the only one we need to be comparing ourselves to is – Jesus. Praying for you as you turn each page of A Confident Heart. Praying that God will not only reveail Himself to you but that you will begin to see yourself as God sees you. You are fearfully and wonderfully made in His image – the image of the King of Kings and are beautiful. I would recommend that you read Psalm 139 every day for the next 30 days. And add your name to the verses like I, Gina am fearfully and wonderfully made. I did this about 10 years or so ago and loved how God not only revealed Himself to me, but He revealed how much he loves me…so much that He sent Jesus to die for me! What an amazing love. Praying for you. Donna B.
Gina, thanks for sharing. I’m doing the same thing too at my church. I believe I have bought into the lie that am unworthy and can be treated anyway anyone wants to treat me. I’ve been very unhappy with my church and have pushed away everyone. I believe that if I am friends with someone at church they eventually will leave which feeds into my believe that I will be abandoned. Walking in God’s light and love is the only way. I’ll be praying for you- please keep in touch
Tammy,
Praying that God will show you how to take those lies that you have been fed and exchange them for His promises. Check out Chapter 12 in A Confident Heart! Renee fills the pages with God’s promises. Take them and claim them for yourself. Chapter 12 is an amazing resource and I know that Renee won’t mind if you look ahead. Blessings, Donna B
Thank you Tammy and Donna. I needed those words of encouragement. I’ll be praying for you too.
Donna – Thank you for sharing your story! It allows us to see that no matter your beginning, God can make beauty for ashes! You are strong and courageous! What an inspiration!
Kayla and Gina,
It is all HIS work. We just have to yield in obedience to Him. So blessed by Him! Blessings, Donna B.
Wow.
What an amazing story!
Thank you for sharing that message of hope with all of us.
Donna, thank you so much for sharing your story. I pray that God will bless you and your family. I’m so thankful that we are children of a Heavenly Father and nothing or noone can take us out of HIS hand. I am learning to lean on HIM and desire more of HIM and less of me in my heart. I want to be a shining light for my Saviour.
Teresa,
Praying for you as you lean into Him. And praising Him and thanking Him for the desire of your heart. Blessings, Donna B.
Wow! I should not be surprised by God and how He works. This post was exactly what I needed to hear this morning. I haven’t even started reading chapter 5 but am excited to now. Last night I went to bed talking to God about two struggles I have in my life right now. God has been using them to draw me closer to Him. I am single and was led to believe that one of my guy friends was interested in me because of some of his actions. In January I confronted him about this at which point he said he was not interested in me. This surprised me. A while later I sent him a message telling him that he had hurt me and put some boundaries in our relationship. My struggle last night was over the fact that he has not even acknowledged receiving the message nor has he apologized for the wrong he has done me. God gave me peace over the situation last night. This post has made it even more clear that I need to accept that is the past and that I can’t change him nor his reactions to me.
God has used this situation to bring me closer to Him. The song by Matt Redmond “Never Once” has really spoken to me. It says I am never alone because never once has God allowed me to go anywhere/ face anything without Him being right there. God is so great, so amazing.
Thank you Renee for facilitating this study and letting God use you through your written words. Thank you Donna for sharing your story and for the encouragement you give us through it.
God bless!
Edith,
Gotta love God and His timing! He knows what we need right when we need it! Not one minute early or one minute late. He knows when we will be ready to listen! Love how he works. Praying for you as walk this journey with your friend. Praying for you to fix your eyes on God and the promise that He will never leave nor forsake you – no matter what. Blessings, Donna
My dad has been an alcoholic for as long as I can remember. He is better now, but when I was a child he was a very angry drunk. He would go on rampages through the house putting his fist through the microwave,
ripping the phone off the wall, and then punching holes in the wall all the way down the hallway. I hovered over my brother in his bedroom to protect him.
He never seemed to have time for me. Didn’t show up for my softball games, and really was not much of a dad to me. He was present but absent if that makes sense. In college The Lord helped me forgive him, and to accept him as my dad, and I was able to actually start loving him.
I still only talk to him when we go to visit which is usually once a year, and if he happens to answer when I call home. I usually try to call him on his birthday which is the day after mine, but he’s usually golfing and doesn’t answer.
Now I’m 31 and have 4 girls of my own, I find myself really grieving that relationship with my dad. Understanding more deeply the unconditional love of my Heavenly Father has been life changing for me! But I find I am really missing that relationship with my daddy with skin on.
Dawn,
Sounds like our childhoods had a lot in common. My Dad was an angry drunk and very angry man. And still is angry. He’s currently in a nursing home and has been thrown out several times for his behavior. Praying for your broken heart and for your Dad to find Jesus. I feel your pain. My Dad was a no show for my high school graduation and for so much more. So I get it and am praying for God to fill you with His love. Even though I had an earthly Dad and I love God’s promise to us of being a father to the fatherless. I love that about God. I also love that no matter what, He will never leave nor forsake us. I love that God is a promise keeper. He can’t go against the promises that He makes to us in His word. Hold onto His promises. Check out Chapter 12 of Renee’s book and claim each of God’s promises for yourself. Blessings, Donna
Dawn and Donna: My dad was an alcoholic, too. He was violent when he was drunk. I did not find out,,until I was older, that some of his drinking and anger might very well have been from the fact that he was blamed, by some, for his mother’s death – who died giving birth to him. How horrible! I am sorry I didn’t know earlier. I spent most of my life loving him, but afraid of him at the same time – afraid of the unknown – when there would be a violent outbreak. I would sit with him at the dining room table, wanting to talk with him, but not knowing what to say. My parents were glad for my “faith,” but we agreed to disagree. 🙁 They took us five siblings to church when we were little, but I do not remember it. I became a Christian at the age of 14, and let my parents know of my concern for their salvation. My mom once put a note on a book I received in the mail entitled “Praying Your Family into God’s Family.” The note said, in essence, don’t worry about it. Following my dad’s death (at the young age of 61), I was able to share with mom how I was feeling, and ultimately she said, “It must be horrible thinking your family is going to hell.” It didn’t change things. I believe my life was/is a witness to my family. My mother and one brother are now deceased. I have an older sister who is out west somewhere – she is mentally challenged at the age of 61, a younger sister, not in the Lord, and one other brother ( 57) who once professed Jesus as Savior, but to my knowledge, is not in church now. He had a series of bad events and became disillusioned with the church. We are estranged. The only sibling with whom I have contact is the younger sister (54 years young). I continue to pray for them all. I am not sure why I shared all of this, but, again, we must accept folks where they are and love them and pray for them. I am praying for more boldness to verbally witness to loved ones, lost ones, and just folks God puts in my path. May we all be sensitive to the Holy Spirit and His nudges. God bless you all!
Cindy, praying for you. Praying for God to provide a way for restoration for your relationships with your family. Praying that God will draw your family to Himself. Praying for God to fill you with the boldness and courage to share His love with those that he puts in your path. Praying for your heart that God will restore His joy to you. I am so sorry that you have had to do through this and praying that God will use your story and your life to bring honor and glory to Him. Praising Him for the work that He is doing in your life – step by step – day by day and choice by choice. Thank you for being so honest and real with us in this safe area that God has created for us. Blessings, Donna B.
Thank you, Donna! God bless you richly!
May I add, too, that I knew (and do know) that my dad loved me. He was there for us. My mother was what I like to call a pillar for us all through those rough years. My dad quit drinking some years before his death and he and mom were able to travel together a good bit. . He had emphysema and his breathing troubles worsened in the last years. My husband, older daughter and I were overseas for four years. I had a greater longing to see him toward the end of those four years. I believe God warned me that something bad was going to happen to my dad. Three months after our return, dad had his first heart attack. He had another about a month later. About one month after that he got pneumonia and that along with the emphysema took his life. I had asked him prior to the first heart attack if I could talk with him about Jesus and he said no. 🙁 God has seen me though all these years and will continue to see me though, along with healing of past hurts – or being able to let it all go! I am so thankful for my Father’s unconditional, unrelenting love!
I also have had to make choices and to learn to accept my loved ones as they are. I was the scapegoat in my family. I grew up abused in everyway. God was always with me. I was very blessed to have had the opportunity to see God move in my fathers heart and change him. God granted both of us a wonderful gift
the gift of forgiveness and reconciliation before my dad went home to heaven. I have been forever grateful for this gift.
I have learned to forgive my mother, to accept her as she is, and to love her. I also have had to forgive my husband for being unfaithful the entire 22 years of our marriage. I accepted him as he was and forgave him. God intervened into my husbands life and he re dedicated his life to Jesus and is in Celebrate Recovery for sexual addiction. God helped me through all this pain and was always with me. I have learned to accept His love, mercy and kindness and now I am working on being confidant In Christ.
Thank you for this book, it came at the right time. I have been working for 3 long hard years through Celebrate Recovery to help me recovery from all the hurts and the habits I developed to survive. This book came right when I needed to go deeper with God.
Thank you for sharing! I’m so grateful for the powerful way that God has moved in your life, in spite of so many difficulties. May you seek Him today and find tremendous blessing!
Debra,
Praising God for you and your story of walking in His light! Praying for you too as you walk through the recovery process and the forgiveness process. Thank you for being so brave by sharing your story. May God use you and your story to bring others closer to Him as He draws you closer to Him. Blessings. Donna B.
Wow! That was powerful. We really do have a choice everyday…. Faced with so many choices and to hear from so many voices…. But if we choose to hear Gods voice… His promises…. And accept the things we cannot change, but rather lay them at his feet. Wow…. What a difference……
Jules,
Thank you for your encouragement. I love how God makes it so simple when He could have made it so hard for us. Thankful that because of Jesus, I have that choice to believe … that choice to accept … that choice to obey …. that choice to forgive. All because of the love of Jesus!! Blessings, Donna B.
Donna, thank you for sharing your life and your message from our Lord. I am struggling now with that choice as these issues resurface more and more lately. So, your message to accept and choose, daily and even moment by moment, is just what I need to hear today. My childhood was different from yours in detail, similar in the rejection, abandonment, abuse, hurt, shame and pain. When I became a believer 24 or so years ago, God did a miraculous work in my life. He took me out of a life of sin and hurt, and I was blessed with a truly godly husband, and now 4 healthy, lovely daughters, each of whom has come to know the Lord. Our life has been wonderful these past 23 years of marriage, not perfect, but objectively I can see that it has been truly good, and my husband and I work hard to cooperate with God to make it so, and I am blessed!
But the fears and pain of the past have robbed me of so much inner peace and joy, and have made it very difficult to trust. After 23 years of faithful, committed, loving marriage, I still fear abandonment and rejection. As I have been seeking the Lord about this the past year, much more the past 4 months, He has shown me how I need to trust Him, let Him heal my hurts and be my Abba Father, let Him take the hurts of my childhood and comfort me; and that I need to release my husband of the unreasonable expectation of doing this for me. I am finding it so hard to break old emotional habits, but this study, and the sharing of so many who are struggling with me, and who have struggled and are living victoriously in Christ, is helping me to see that it is possible. I think on thing that is really coming home to me is what you said, and I know Renee has said it, Beth Moore says it, Proverbs 31 says it, and you all say it because God’s own Word says it: living victorious in Jesus is not a one time event; it is not a weekly on Sunday event; it is not even a 9:00 in the morning every day event; it is a moment by moment choice to believe God that He is who He says He is, and that I am His and therefore of immeasurable worth!
Thank you, Donna, for sharing your journey with Jesus, with me.
Learning to trust Him for more than my salvation,
Becky
Thanks for sharing, Becky. As you and some of the other ladies have pointed out, past pains and hurts can lead us to create unreasonable expectations for our present and future. I’ve never really thought about it this way before, but it makes perfect sense! Because I don’t want to re-experience pain from the past, I take measures to prevent those scenarios from replaying. However, that means I would have to exert an incredible amount of control over my circumstances, as well as those around me. God is teaching me that the only person I can really control is myself, and He is the one who is ultimately in control. I don’t need to work so hard to prevent past hurts from replaying, I do need to surrender my fears and goals to Him. History is notorious for repeating itself, and God knows that better than anyone. I just need to trust Him.
You are so “right on” Julie. I too have tried to control my circumstances to “protect” myself from hurts of the past repeating, but I need to let go and let God take full control. Trusting in His care for me. I am still struggling with that timeline. There are more things than I had realized from the past that need to be walked through and healed. But I am so thankful for ALL the women here who are opening up and being so transparent. Goes right along with what I got from the Women of Faith conference I just went to. God ties it all together 🙂
God bless you all! †
Julie and Cheryl,
Thanks for speaking up. Attempts to control have certainly played into my life, and have failed. Learning to trust God and allow His Spirit to control me, and to trust Him with the hearts of my husband and children and friends is hard, but it is what He calls me to. I, too, am so grateful for the transparency of all of the women on this site. I never expected to share my heart and struggles as I have done so far here, and am truly blessed to feel the safety and acceptance and love here.
Lots of lessons to learn, and I am thankful that God will stick with me until He has accomplished His work in me!
God’s strength and comfort to you
Julie, thanks for sharing. I find that not only do I sometimes avoid situations that could repeat the past, I sometimes put up barriers that keep me from being vulnerable even to those I love and who love me, to avoid the possibility of rejection. Not good! It has robbed me of much joy and peace. It is time to take back the strongholds that Satan has been holding in and never give him a foothold again.
I am in this for the long haul, and learning to lean on God, walk with Jesus and let the Holy Spirit work in and through me. I sometimes feel that I am not a very apt student, but I do have the best Teacher! I guess that would make Renee His Teacher’s Assistant 🙂 Thanks, Renee!
Becky,
Thank you for your “realness” with your struggles and your past. I read this quote from Max Lucado just this morning …. “God does not see the mark of your past. Instead, He sees this: “See, I have inscribed you on the palms of My hands.” (Isaiah 49:16).
Not only are our names inscribed on the palms of His hands, but our past is the past and He is our hope and future. (Jer. 29:11).
Praying for God to fill you with His power and His strength and that you will lean into HIs power as you release your past and grab onto your future and your hope! Blessings, Donna B
Thank you, Donna. My husband has been reminding me that not one thing has ever happened to me with out God’s knowledge and He is not ashamed of me, He is not overwhelmed by me, and He is in the processes of using it all to make me more like His Son, and to bring glory to Himself. What a joy to know that God can use the most broken to bring glory to Himself! I am inscribed on the palms of His hands, and He is my hope and my future.
The past always tries to sneak up and tap you on the shoulder, I acknowledge it with a tilt of the head then a prayer. My family is gone now so it helps a little to not live in the past just accept and move on. My mom used to say she hated me and I was the cause of all her problems, nut I will always love her and was there for her when she passed.
Chris,
The past does has this way of sneaking up on us. But love now matter when or how it sneaks up, God fills us with His power to deflate and ignore it. And I am so sorry that mom used and said such harsh things to you. But always know that nothing can separate us from the love of Jesus. There is nothing we can do or not do that will cause Him to love us less. What an amazing promise from Him! Blessings, Donna
Thank you so much for sharing, Donna. I was rejected many times by so-called friends when I was a teen and young adult. I was never quite good enough, and as a result, it has made me more choosy now when considering someone a friend. I am very thankful that I have Jesus in my life, He’s my Ultimate Friend!
Karen,
He is our ultimate friend. And so trustworthy! Praying for you Karen and praying for God to reveal Himself to you in new and exciting ways. I love to go to Isaiah 43:4 and fill myself with this promise from Him when those feelings of rejection rear their ugly heads, “You, (Karen) are precious and honored in my sight, and …. I (God) love you (Karen). Take that promise and claim it for yourself. Blessings. Donna
Hi everyone.
Thank you so much, Renee for writing this book. It has helped me to see my self-doubts totally different. I wanted God to take it away and heal it. Now I see that I have to turn to God every time self-doubt is telling me a lie. I want to live in his promises. 1. Peter 2:9 is a big promise for me today.
But you are not like that, for you are a chosen people. You are royal priests, a holy nation, God’s very own possession. As a result, you can show others the goodness of God, for he called you out of the darkness into his wonderful light. (1 Peter 2:9 NLT)
A Confident Heart was a life and heart changer for me. Thanking god with you for Renee and the story that God gave Renee to share with all of us. Love her obedience to Him! Blessings. Donna B
PRAISE GOD for HE is good!! Wow – Thanks for sharing your story, Donna!! You are an encourager to many!!
Yep, God is good ALL the time! And ALL the time, God is good! He blesses me beyond my understanding and am so blessed that God uses the story that He has given me to bring others closer to His heart. Blessings, Donna B
My heart aches for the pain & rejection you went through, then rejoices that you listened to the still, small voice of our Father & chose to walk in forgiveness, extend forgiveness, and step into freedom! May God richly bless as He heals the brokenness of your heart as He uses your story to offer hope to others!
Thanks Deb! I am rejoicing in the fact that He is my hope and my future. (Jer 29:11). What man meant to harm me, God is using to bring Himself honor and glory! So blessed that He loves me like crazy. Blessings, Donna B.