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Renee Swope

Encouraging and equipping moms to parent with God's grace and confidence.

{week 2} To Be Known Is to Be Loved

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From Chapter 2, A Confident Heart

“Jesus knew Sam’s (the Samaritan woman’s) story and He knows yours. The Greek word for “know” is yada. It means a deep emotional experience; a bonding between two people when one truly feels the emotions of the other. Jesus knows your pain, fears, doubts, and disappointments. He understands your dreams and desires.

Although some of us feel uncomfortable that God knows so much about us, it is good to be known, to be listened to and not judged. Jesus is the only One who can meet our deepest needs to be accepted and delighted in simply because of who we are. We can offer nothing but our presence, and He will desire us just the same…

There are many religions but did you know that Christianity is the only faith that offers a relationship with the living God? We don’t just know about our God; our God wants us to know Him. And we were created for that kind of relationship.

Jesus created us to have lasting soul-security in knowing we are valued and pursued by the One who knows and loves us—the One who created our inmost being and wove us together in our mother’s womb (Ps. 139:13). Have you let the gospel of God’s grace move from your head to your heart, so that you know without a doubt you are known intimately and loved completely by God?” (p. 40 printed copy)

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Our word this week is  “Known”

Our verse of the week is Jeremiah 1:5 – “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart…” (NIV)

This week’s video message is below. Please click the arrow to watch it  – all the way through. You’ll be so glad you did.

(from video script)

I WANT TO BE KNOWN
I want someone to look at my face
And not just see two eyes, a nose,
a mouth and two ears
But to see all that I am, and could be
all my hopes, loves and fears…

And YOU know me
You actually know me
all of me and everything about me
Every thought inside and hair on top of my head
Every hurt stored up, every hope, every dread
My past and my future, all I am and could be
You tell me everything,
You tell me about ME
And that which is spoken by another would bring hate and condemnation
Coming from Youu brings love, grace, mercy, hope and salvation
I’ve heard of One to come
who could save a wretch like me
And here in my presence, You say
I AM HE…

(read full script here)

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Today’s Assignment:

  • Read this week’s memory verse (Jeremiah 1:5). Ask God to remind you all week that He knows the way you long to be known, pursued and loved!
  • Start or continue reading chapter 2. Remember, take your time and highlight or underline sentences that resonate in your heart.

Connect in Community:

What about today’s video or sentences in Chapter 2 resonate most with you?

  • Please click “Share Your Thoughts” below this post and do just that.  (Remember to go to my website to do this)
  • Optional: I’d love for you to share one of them on our Confident Heart Community Page and/or share them with me on Twitter (@reneesswope). I’d love to retweet them! Also let’s use #AConfidentHeart so we can encourage one another and find them easily.

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I’ll announce last week’s winners in my Weds. post.

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Comments

  1. “Sometimes I think we tell people we’re fine even when we’re not, because we want to be fine. Or we hope that by saying we are fine, eventually we will be…Although we tell people we’re fine, what we really mean is that we are Frazzled, Irritated, Neurotic, and Exhausted!…Pretending leads to hiding and isolation…Eventually, though, we find ourselves in the shadows of doubt, convinced that we aren’t worth knowing or pursuing. Slowly we begin to believe we have to be perfect to be loved and accepted…O how I longed for someone to see past the exterior facade and look into the secret places of my heart. I wanted to be known and loved for who I was. Yet if I let my guard down, I was afraid someone would say I was too sensitive or too serious…” These passages together explain me. Who I really am. Unfortunately in our culture, when you are asked “How are you?” many people don’t expect a long response about how you really are, they want to hear “I’m fine” so they can keep going and move on. I’ve tried to respond truthfully, but briefly, just to be true to myself. But how do I explain so much in so little time? Now when I respond “I’m fine,” I know there are 2 meanings 🙂 and whichever one I mean is for me to know whether I want to explain or not…

  2. So loved the poem!!! It is awesome!!! Chapter 2 has spoke to me in so many ways and helped me to realize things I didn’t know even existed!! The question that spoke to me in this chapter was #6. We were ask to read John 4 again and see if we can relate. As I did, God showed me that we are so much like “Sam”. When she answers Jesus about wanting the water that will make her thirst no more so she doesnt have come to the well anymore. What God showed me is that for me I am like her sometimes when I want a quick fix instead of dealing with the problem. I just want him to help me and not dig deep to find out the main issue. He spoke to me and said that through the pain I give you wisdom so when you opt for the easy way out you miss out!!! All I could say way”Whoa”!!! Thank you God for your wisdom and knowledge!! Thank you for loving me even when I don’t feel lovable!!! All I can say is my Abba Father is awesome!!!! So glad I join this bible study and a big thanks to Renee for being such an obedient servant and writing it!!!

  3. I am going to STOP asking Jesus to change the course of my day and START asking Him to change the course of my life.

  4. So glad to know God knows me, and because He knows me this way, I am totally and abundantly loved by Him. No matter what I do, I know He loves me, and will help me up when I fall. He will hear me when I am hurting and not ridicule me. He will forgive me when I am lost… Man, our God is good! This has to stick! I never really just sat and thought about how much God knows about me. He knows everything, but He still sent His son to die.. BEFORE, I was born.. He knew I would slap Him in the face with sin, but He died and rose anyways. Man, our God is good!

  5. Loved this video and Chapter 2 spoke to me. One thing that got to me was where it says that “pretending leads to hiding and isolation.” That is me big time. I put up walls and don’t let anyone in. I can relate to “Sam.” I have had relationship issues as well as isolating myself from the world. Unfortunately there is so much condemnation in the church as well as the world. I am so glad that Jesus loves me with all of my imperfections.

  6. I love the video!!!!!!!!!!!! Thanks for sharing this with us!!

  7. “To be known is to be loved, to be loved is to be known”…”you actually know me, all of me and everything about me”.. Wow!!!

    “Now I keep to myself and by that I mean the pain that keeps me in my own private jail…”. This stood out to me in that when we keep things to ourselves, we hold ourselves in that jail, and how freeing it is to share with others, even when it can be so hard to open up……it is so freeing. Satan wants us to stay in jail, not God!!!!

    “Let me run back to town, this is way too much for just me.”. This also stood out to me because I have really felt Jesus calling me to be bold in sharing Him with others, and not letting my fears or doubts stop me from doing that…… Like Sam, she ran back to others to tell them all about Jesus….. What great examples to follow! What an encouragement as I’ve been praying for boldness.

  9. I finished Ch 2 and watched the video again. Don’t have time to answer questions yet . This stirs up all kinds of feelings in me. Thinking about rejection as a child and a young woman. At 62 I’m starting to get that Jesus will never reject me. I grew up in a religion that portrayed God as distant and angry. Add to that growing up not know my earthly father; my mom divorcing her 2nd husband who I thought was my father; My grandmother telling me at age 7 not to be sad and showing me a picture of a strange man and telling me that was my real father and this should be our “secret”. I grew up afraid of men. My uncle molested me. I looked for validation at every man that showed me any interest.. Lots for me to learn and I’m happy to be in this study. I’m working on telling my secrets so I don’t have to carry that heavy burden anymore. Thanks to Renee for sharing her story and giving us a chance to do the same. God is good.

  10. As I read chapter two where Renee says “we begin to believe we have to be perfect to be loved and accepted.” I had to stop and reflect on what the word Perfect meant to me. To be perfect to me was be what every one wanted of me Before long I was trying to be so many people I lost sight of me. Everyone seemed to want me for what they could make me into to satisfy their need. So the people- pleaser was born. There was no chance to develop into someone I wanted to be or had the chance to be I was so busy being what “others” wanted me to be. So I never developed confidence to try something on my own, that would mean I was alone and I needed someones approval. I’m still that way in a lot of areas.

  13. truly loved it…..it really got me fired up in the fact that HE loves me for me…always has and always will. HE doesn’t judge me for my wrong doings, but come to me for me to seek him so he can get to know me better….I can’t even put into words how much this video touched me. I will be sharing it with others for sure!! Thank you for this study!
    Blessings to all (love reading the posts from everyone else)

  14. For to be known is to be loved
    And to be loved is to be known

    .. I want to be known and I want others to be known. Thank the Lord for he is good.

  15. I love this verse! Especially today because it is my birthday. To realize He knew me and loved me before He formed me and He set me apart is a miracle. To think about it makes me know I am special and He has a purpose for me. It is hard to express in words but this is the greatest birthday wish I could have recived today! Thank-you Jesus!!!!!!!!
    I love you!

  16. “And you know me
    You actually know me
    all of me and everything about me
    It is absolutely amazing that even though God knows all of my faults and inadequacies (in my doubting mind) that he still loves me, truly loves me. It is through his love that I am finding the confidence to shed my barriers and walls and really work to be great and not paralyzed by fear.

    I truly believe the following statement in the book and it is the reason why I do and will continue to nurture my relationship with God:
    A personal relationship with God sets us free to be all we were created to be.
    With God all things are possible.

    These are very important messages that I hold very close to my heart as I start on my Master’s Degree while continuing my important roles as a Wife, Mother of 3, and work full-time as HR Director.

    I know that God is calling me to further my education and that he will be with me each step of the way!!!

  17. I am so much more like Sam than I EVER thought. I have been so frustrated in relationships with others (and even now in my marriage) because I feel like it’s all about what I can do for them…not about knowing ME. And like the poem states – to be known is to be loved and to be loved is to be known…I’ve been hurting for so long because I feel like I’ve never been loved because I’ve never been known. I’ve allowed this hurt to turn to anger & anger into bitterness. I don’t want to be bitter or angry or hurt. And I SEE where God knows me & loves me, but sometimes it seems beyond reach. And sometimes wouldn’t it be nice to be known/loved by someone with skin? Maybe I’ve been searching in the wrong place – maybe His love will meet all my needs…that’s what I’m told anyway, but how on Earth do I get there?? It seems like Sam came to it so easily after meeting Jesus…I want that – am I over thinking this??

    • Anna…
      His love will meet all your needs for sure. I love what Renee wrote in chapter 2: “Christianity is the only faith that offers a relationship with God. We don’t just know about God; our God wants us to know Him. We were created for that kind of relationship.”

      You asked how on earth do you get there and it is relationship. Seeking Him with all your heart, mind and soul. Keep reading “A Confident Heart” and ask God to show you what it is He has for you in this book. The book won’t change you, but the God behind the book will…if you let Him.

      Praying for you! 🙂

    • I feel the same as you..I didn’t realize I was so much like Sam. Although I believe God allows us to go through many things to lead us to where He wants us to be, sometimes it’s difficult dealing with the pain that goes with it. I’m so glad God meets us where we are because sometimes it’s hard to find our way to Him.

  18. I want someone to look at my face
    And not just see two eyes, a nose,
    a mouth and two ears
    But to see all that I am, and could be
    all my hopes, loves and fears

    But that’s too much to hope for, to wish for,
    or pray for
    So I don’t, not anymore

    Now I keep to myself
    And by that I mean the pain that keeps me in my own private jail
    The pain that’s brought me here at midday to
    this well

  19. I was struck by Renee’s story. I too have always felt that I’m not worth staying for. My parents divorced when I was younger, causing my dad to leave our house. While my dad was physically still in my life, emotionally I felt abandoned. In my early twenties, I went around to different guys, trying to get them to fill the emptiness I felt. In every relationship, I would sub-consciously ask if I was worth staying around for. It never worked. I left heartbroken more times than I can count. Renee said, “On the outside everything looked “fine”, yet on the inside I was haunted by thoughts of never being good enough. I felt like I could never do enough to measure up.”

    While I can’t say I’m fully there yet, I feel like God has healed so many parts of my heart. I don’t only that He NEVER leaves us, I feel like I’ve internalized that. He knows us and loves us the same. While I still find myself trying to gain my identity in my work or through my relationships, I just hope that God can continue to help me feel more confident in Him and who he has made me to be.

    ‘To be known is to be loved and to be loved is to be known.”

    I’m not sure about you ladies, but since I’ve started this book, I’ve felt like past insecurities have come to the surface. I find myself doubting big decisions I’ve recently made and worrying more and more what people think of me. Maybe this is God’s way of bringing things to the surface in order to heal them. What do you think?

    • I think two things are going on. God wants to bring complete wholeness and healing – and the enemy wants to intimidate you and convince you it’s not worth it – and bring to mind everything so that you’ll turn back. I pray you won’t do it. You will claim all of the truths over each and every thought and live in the security of HIS promises in each decision and detail. You were made for more than doubt and uncertainty – you were made for lasting confidence and peace. Just seek HIM with all your heart and ask HIM to make your paths straight and to lead you and then keep listening TO HIM and not to the whispers of doubts and fear.

      I had to learn these truths while I wrote the book b/c my own past junk and hurts surfaced but with each one I invited God to enter into that moment with me and bring healing and over time He did. I’m so thankful I persevered and didn’t throw away my confidence the many, many times the enemy tried to convince me I should,

      Praying for you right now Hannah. :0)

      • Renee! Thanks so much for this post, it means a lot to me. Last night I put up a few of God’s promises on the wall of my house to remind me where my confidence comes from. Reading those promises over and over again, even when you don’t feel it, makes a big difference. Thanks for praying for me!

  20. What an awesome video “Known & Loved” I really enjoyed the way John 4 was put into this video and depicting the Samaritan woman meeting up with Jesus. These are the parts that stood out for me:

    You whisper as I pass by and cast judgmental glances
    Though you don’t really take the time to look at me
    Or even get to know me

    You whisper and tell me to my face
    what all those glances have been about and
    You take the time to really look at me
    But don’t need to get to know me
    For to be known is to be loved and
    To be loved is to be known

    And you know me
    You actually know me
    all of me and everything about me
    Every thought inside and hair on top of my head
    Every hurt stored up, every hope, every dread

    My past and my future, all I am and coulb be
    you tell me everything,
    you tell me about ME

    Chapter 2 was reaching out to me- letting me know no matter what my faults or wrong doings that HE loves me and wants to have a personal relationship with me, and this chapter is teaching me to open up to Jesus. My favorite part of Chapter 2 is this:

    He invites you to come to Him to receive the perfect love He offers–love that casts out fear, love that is patient and kind, love that keeps no record of wrongs.

    You and I are not worthy of His love and we can never do anything to deserve it–but we are worth His love because He chose to give it to us. We are His! Hold on to this promise and live in the power of its truth: because God’s love is perfect, you don’t have to be!

    Thank you Jesus that you are al oving & forgiving God-help me to continue to draw nearer to you Lord. Amen

    Aloha from Hawaii oxoxoxox