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Renee Swope

Encouraging and equipping moms to parent with God's grace and confidence.

A very sad day…

Today was a very, very sad day. Beyond description. One of my best friends for almost 14-years – my sweet and precious daschund – Chelsea, died this afternoon. She was sick when we got home Sat night after I’d been speaking in TN. She seemed okay yesterday but got much worse this afternoon. By the time I got her to the vet she was gasping for her last breath. At first the Vet thought it was some kind of food poisoning or something because he couldn’t figure out what was wrong. But after she died and we talked more about changes we’ve seen over the past few months with her vision and hearing, the Vet thinks she may have had a brain tumor that we didn’t know about. Over the past two days it seems as though her brain, lungs and heart just started to shut down. It was the saddest thing I’ve ever been through.

 
She was my constant companion. My shadow and friend. She followed me everywhere when I was at home and even traveled with me in the car when the weather permitted. She sat by my side when I read my Bible in my favorite chair, layed under my feet when I sat at my computer desk, cuddled up close to my side when I sat on the couch to watch tv, write radio shows, blog, etc. For the past few weeks though, she spent most of her time in her doggy bed. I’d have to go get her to come sit with me.
I have sobbed all afternoon. I know I’ll be okay, but I miss her deeply and don’t know what my days will be like without her. I am so sad. My heart is heavy and I wish this hadn’t happened now during a time when I want to be happy and focused.
I know God’s timing is perfect and I know her death today is probably God’s protection from us losing her in our new home. This was her home for most of her life. I had been recently thinking about how stressful our move would be for Chelsea, since she was getting so old and doesn’t like change. I am telling myself all of this to help me let go. It’s not easy but focusing on what is true and on God’s faithfulness brings moments of comfort in the midst of my deep sadness and grief.

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Comments

  1. Renee,
    I just read this. I am so sorry. That is such a tough time. I remember losing my Sam…very awkard looking dog as his parents were a Afghan & Black Lab. He had the Afghan skinny body & one time an anonymous neighbor~we knew who she was~ left a note saying we needed to feed him. Years after I was out of the house, Sam died. The cool part was, he got out of the backyard somehow & went and died in the alley under a bush. Didn’t want to die where all of my good memories of him were I suppose.
    So neat how you adored your Chelsea…maybe her & Sammy have hooked up in Doggy Heaven. 🙂 Hope this made you smile.
    Love,
    Lelia

  2. Oh Renee, I have been out of town and am just reading this post. I’m so sorry for your loss and will be praying that God will continue to comfort you.

    Love and Blessings,
    Dawn

  3. Renee, I am so sorry for your loss of Chelsea…I so totally understand how you feel…we had to put our almost 17 year old Australian cattle dog Sassy to sleep last year and it was the hardest thing I’ve ever done…they are such loving fur friends and a big part of a family…my prayers and comforting thoughts are with you and your family…
    Love,
    Kelly

  4. Hi Renee,

    I don’t know how much you go back to read comments on past posts, but I want you to know I know exactly what you are going through. This past Tuesday my family lost a family member of our own. Our dear sweet Lucky puppy had a stroke,became paralysed , and had neurological damage that couldn’t be repaired. My heart broke. My family cried, sobbed. I know what you are going through all too well. It helped us to make a colleage of pictures of our memories with her. I pray you find comfort in remember how dear she was to you, and how dear you were to her.

    Connie

  5. I understand how the heart gets connected to our pets. We have a diva dog who is aging and as you described your companionship with Chelsea it was like our home. Praying God’s comfort, I’m not looking forward to that day arriving in our home. Peace.

  7. I’m sorry to hear about your loss. I experienced this loss after having our lab for 10 years. He was an outside dog and I always referred to him as my husband’s dog or my kid’s dog and I really didn’t think I had such an attachment for him – until he was gone. I bet I cried everyday for two weeks each time I drove into the driveway and he wasn’t there. My only advice to you is to let yourself grieve and to experience this loss for what it is.

  8. Renee;

    I always enjoy reading your blog because you give such great insight to those of us who read it. Now it is our turn to comfort you and give you hope.

    I lost my PC Kitty (PC stands for Partly Cloudy, she was grey!)5 months ago and I miss her terribly. She, too was at my feet, by my side, in my face, on top of reading and work materials whenever I was home. She was my constant companion and relocated with me five times in the 13 years we spent together. She was my family and just the best!

    I am truly sorry for your loss and pray for comfort. I still blow kisses to PC every morning as I leave for work. I know she is sitting in God’s lap (probably next to Chelsea!) giving Him lots of love.

    Be blessed today and find comfort in our Lord and Savior.

    Monica

  9. Sorry about your doggie. I pray that you will be comforted in the days to come. We lost a good old dog that we’d had for several years last year. It was hard, especially on the girls. With time comes healing.
    Blessings~Alyce

  10. I’m praying for you. I know that is a very hard thing. I will keep praying for you.

    I had a dog for 6 months and for a variety of reasons, had to give her back. I still cry about her.