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Renee Swope

Encouraging and equipping moms to parent with God's grace and confidence.

Read An Excerpt: Chapter 1 & 2

There is No One Like You!

Do you remember being in middle school? Those were the awkward years. I remember not really liking who I was or how I looked. I have a feeling a lot of us didn’t like ourselves at that age, but we all desperately wanted others to like us, right?

At that point, I think a lot of us secretly compared ourselves to those around us, observed who was liked most, and tried to be like the popular people.

In my Proverbs 31 devotion, “Becoming the Real Me,” I talk about having that same unhealthy habit in my adult life, too. And I know I’m not alone. For many women, it wasn’t just a phase when we were teenagers; it’s still a struggle now. Sometimes it’s because we don’t have the confidence to find out who we really are. Many of us are just more comfortable buried in busyness and hiding behind our self-doubts.

Lots of times it’s because we’re believe we don’t have anything special to offer anyway, so we just keep being who others want, need or expect us to be.

Well my friend, it’s time to do something about it. How? First we have to stop comparing ourselves to other women. Why would we compare how we feel inadequate on the inside with how someone else looks like they had it all together on the outside? We’ll always end up feeling less than.

Not only is comparison toxic for us personally, it’s also destructive relationally. Comparison makes us measure our worth against other women, and we end up competing with each other.

But God created us to complete one another, not compete with each other.

In my book, A Confident Heart, I share how we can do that by encouraging each others’ strengths, overlooking each others’ weaknesses and celebrating each other’ uniqueness.

The truth is, life is hard and we need each other! “But now God has placed the parts, each one of them in the body just as He wanted. And if they were all the same part, where would the body be? Now there are many parts, yet one body.” 1 Corinthians 12:18-20

God gives all of us unique personalities, abilities, passions and experiences because we each play a leading role in the story He’s writing with our lives.

So, today when you are tempted to compare yourself to another woman and doubt starts whispering that you’re not as smart as she is, or gifted or pretty or godly…remember you are “God’s masterpiece…created anew in Christ so that [you] can do the good things He planned for [you] long ago.” Ephesians 2:10, (NLT)

In my upcoming book, A Confident Heart: How to Stop Doubting Yourself and Live in the Security of God’s Promises, I have a whole chapter on this topic and other self-doubts that keep us from becoming the women God created us to be!

I’m giving away three copies today, but first I’d love for you to watch this 2-minute introduction video.

I’m praying for each of you today as you begin to discover and embrace the woman God created you to be! Remember, there is no one like you…and the world is missing someone special until you become her!

If you’d like to read A Confident Heart when it releases, and share it with friends, enter to win 3 copies (1 for yourself and 2 for friends) below:

  • To enter one time, click on the word “comments” below to share thoughts about today’s topic. (If you don’t have a blog it’s okay, click anonymous and type in the white box. But be sure to leave your first name to be part of a drawing).
  • To enter two times, leave a comment with your thoughts and leave another letting me know you’re sharing this post via Facebook and/or twitter with a link back to my twitter page @reneeswope or back to my Facebook page @A Confident Heart by Renee Swope FB page.(https://www.facebook.com/renee.swope?ref=name#!/pages/A-Confident-Heart-by-Renee-Swope/160376334023273)

A Confident Heart releases August 1st, but you can pre-order yours at P31 today and be the first to receive a signed copy in early August! (P31 is getting early copies in mid July.)


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Comments

  1. Hi Renee,
    During my shower last night I was so burdened down. I see all of my inadequacy and failures constantly. We Homeschool and I really acted ugly yesterday to
    my children. so this has just overwhelmed my heart to a point of feeling like all is lost! I fell to my knees and wept it all out to my Lord. Confessing and pleading for strength to overcome and our family to be healed from all of the heart breaking words that end up spoken. I see the Pattern of pleasing others and never feeling good enough just continuing to be handed down to my precious children. Your devotion blessed my heart, I am praying that If it is Gods will, I will win your give away. I would enjoy your book. Have a blessed day and thank you for the encouragement. Audrey

  2. Between your blog and the video, it made me realize that I have yet to find whatever it is God wants me to be doing. Self-sacrifice has always been something that I was silently proud of. After all, being a Mom and wife is about making sacrifices, right? Not if it means losing yourself, which I have…and didn't even know it. In this moment, I'm terrified and excited to discover the person God intended for me to be. Thank you.

    PS: I barely had the confidence to write my comment. Yikes! I have some work to do. 🙂

  3. Your message definitely hits home. At 37, I have no idea who I am or what God's purpose is for me. I will definitely read the book, whether I win it or not. Thank you for such an honest message.

  5. I needed this today because I do find myself feeling inadequate…especially as a parent. Thank you!!

    jody

  6. I was so blessed with this devotional. I have been using every tool God has placed in my path to healing and restoring what the locust have eaten. Sometimes defeated, I say Lord when will this end, I just want to go be with you. But God it not finished with me yet, and the consolation of yourdevotional was ever so comforting to realize that I just need to ask Him what His dreams for my life are. going on 39…and I still don't know what I wanna be,but HE does!
    Blessings MASI

  7. I was so blessed with this devotional. I have been using every tool God has placed in my path to healing and restoring what the locust have eaten. Sometimes defeated, I say Lord when will this end, I just want to go be with you. But God it not finished with me yet, and the consolation of yourdevotional was ever so comforting to realize that I just need to ask Him what His dreams for my life are. going on 39…and I still don't know what I wanna be,but HE does!
    Blessings MASI

  8. Hi Rene, Wow! That devotional came at the right time. I had just been sitting at my dinning room table, asking God "when will this all end, I am so tired. Lord what do you want for me?" and literally thinking, what's the point in living right. I know terrible to think that, but I know I am not alone, we all come to a breaking point, it is then that God has our attention. Reading your devo yesterday blew me away, and everything you said in your video was so righ on for me. I would love to win those three copies of your new upcoming book. Thank you, your ministry is helping thousands of women like myself to see life and ourselves through the eyes of a MERCIFUL SAVIOR and CREATOR.
    Blessings MASI

  9. Rene, your devotional came at such an opportune time. God's timing could not have been any better. Him timing sees to always be good, or just better. Thank you for the wake up call that I can be confident and for posing that question about our dreams. I realize I do need to take time and ask God, what are His dreams for my life. God is using you in such a powerful way, If it's God will for me to win these 3 copies of the book awesome, I already know who to give them to. If not I will get one for me and pass it along after. THX
    MASI

  11. I was still trying to find my identity which now I can only in Christ. Thank you for the encouragement I am God's desire and unique.

    Rebecca

  12. Wow, this is me all over. Something I've been trying to overcome my whole life. Thanks, Renee for the reminder of God's truth.

  14. This ties in with a bible study that I am doing, Captivating by John and Stasi Eldridge. Love it and perfect timing!

  15. I am a grandmother of 2 and 65 years old. I would love to share the books with my 2 daughters, so they don't end up like me, wondering what God wants me to do with the rest of my life, when I retire. I have always put myself last, I am a nurse so I even do that at work. Carolann Luersen (Nanacarol to my family)

  16. Hello! The video spoke of such hope. So encouraging. Very much needed in these times. It is so hard to trust and surrender our hearts to God. I hope to be able to do this. I know of two others who also are in need of help. God bless you and continue to guide you in your ministry!
    Josie

  17. This book sounds like a really great book and is one i really would like to own. So many of us need to have that confidence within ourselves and in God which is the only way will make it through life. Your awesome Renee!I shared your post by the way on facebook with my friends.

    God bless you,
    Gloria Castillo

  19. This already sounds like a book that will be on my summer reading list! You included my favorite verse – Ephesians 2:10! Can't wait to get the book and get started. Thanks, Renee!

  20. If is very encouraging to be reminded of our own worth when we start to feel worthless. I need to remember that God made me who I am and how I am for a purpose.
    Thank you

    • Amazing things here. I am very satisfied to look your post.
      Thanks so much and I’m looking ahead to contact you.
      Will you please drop me a mail?

  21. I would LOVE to win a copy of your book A Confident Heart! I would love to share it with my teenage girls. It is so important to realize you are truly God's unique creation and be confident in who you are, especially through the tough teen years (something I still struggle with as an adult). I look forward to reading it when it comes out!

  22. I love the way you said "But God created us to complete one another, not compete with each other." Oh how true, but easy to forget. I know how this feels and am slowing working on getting some of my own goals (that are just mine, not my husband's). This book is made for me and a few girls in my youth group that have the ability to grow so much. Fantastic!!

  25. I cannot wait to read this book. More than anything I would love to be able to share it with other women also. This is a message we all need to hear so desperately.

  27. Loved the statement, "But God created us to complete one another, not compete with each other." No if I could only remember that in the heat of the moment!

  28. At the moment I am hurting for my daughter who is battling with the issue of not knowing who she really is – and what God wants of her. I found this article such a help and will be passing it on to her. Thank you. Trish

  29. We all need this message as we recover from the sin of having to tear someone else down or apart to feel better about our-selves. That's really what we are doing when we compare ourselves to other women! And it hurt so much more when it is going on inside or between women that are wearing the 'mask' of friendship:-( all the while secretly being competitors.

    As we learn to accept God's love inside all of our dark little places and heal then we are able to be radiant reflections of HIS glory.

    I listen to you speak every other day on the P31 radio show that you share with Lysa and I can tell your voices apart especially when I close my eyes! Actually knowing which one of you is about to give the devotional before you announce which of you is speaking.

    I really like the quality of your voice. I don't detect any pretenses. I can tell you have a strong nurturing quality as your voice has a really warm, soft-spoken glow/ beauty!

    And the little hint of a 'Southern Accent' is so endearing! I'm from the south and I have spent too much of my life not being fully comfortable with that but all of you God-loving and authentic ladies with P31 have inspired me to view my southern roots differently.

    And yes, I will also share this post via Face-book and Twitter.

    Jennifer

  31. I am still praying for the Holy Spirit to show me what God has planned for me and I am 51. If I compare myself at all with others it is with wistfullness that they seemed to somehow know what path they should walk on, and I am still struggling.

  32. I long to reconnect and find my completeness through His plan. I find your words encouraging.
    Tami

  34. Hi, Ugh…you're getting a little too close for comfort there, Missy! I have always felt like a "less-than"…tried to get over it but stumble over certain weaknesses and physical flaws that seem to taunt me.

  35. This is exactly what God is speaking to me! I'm 59 years old, but it's never too late to come into who He made me to be. THis seems to be a real theme for women of God right now. He has a calling and a place for each one of His daughters. Thank you for the encouragement!
    Rita

  36. What you said really rings home. I wish I didn't spend so much time thinking about what other people think. I also wish I had a delete button.

  37. What you said really rings home. I wish I had a delete button and that I wouldn't spend so much energy thinking about what other people think of me.

  38. I could certainly benefit from this book, as so many of us can. If it's not too late, please enter my name in the drawing.

    Thank you so much for your ministry. The Lord bless & keep you!

    Walking in the Light!!!!
    tina gilbert

  39. I loved the "Becoming the Real Me,"
    It's sooooooo encouraging to know that I am not the only one! Sometimes I feel like I must be crazy for not trying to find out who I am, because it often seems that so many other have already. I have felt like I've been "stuck" and unsure, because I am trying to do the "right" things a christian GOOD wife does, when I should be worrying about what God wants me to do, and discover who I am in Him. THANKS! 🙂

  40. I know one person already who I would like to share this with. Thanks, Eva

  41. I think this is one of the biggest struggles women have and truth be told alot of us have never even been asked what do you love to do, we just sift thru all the hats we to wear as a woman. So excited about this book.

  42. I have lived with self-doubt all my life. I know in my head that God made me his masterpiece, but my heart can't accept my imperfections.

  43. Thank you for your words today. I have been been stuggling with self doubt for so long. I too have wondered what my passions and dreams should be.

    I have come to realize that my true passion is for the Lord himself. I feel that I am a lump of clay longing for the Potter's creative hands, yet day after I am left on the shelf not knowing what I am to become.

  44. How very amazing to have more than halfway to one hundred comments on your blog post within six hours of posting!
    What a blessing you are to so many people, Renee!
    Thank you!

  46. and here I am 65 yrs old and wondering if I am all God wants me to be! I think not! You are never too old to open your heart to the Lord's revealings.

  48. Thank you for sharing your story. I feel lost right now myself. Not liking who I've become and not knowing who I am supposed to be. Wanting to be liked and being a pleaser has just made me angry, bitter and unable to trust anyone.Reading your story showed me I am not alone. I can still find out who God made me to be. I don't have to give up on myself. even though sometimes I thought God had.

  49. Oh My!!! I need to read this book, hoping I win if not I will have to check to see if our local library can get a copy.
    Thank you for remindning me that I am fearfully and wonderfully made! HAVE A BLESSED DAY!
    Charlotte

  50. I would love to read your book and try to connect myself to true interests and talents that I KNOW are hidden.