Have you ever gotten that awful pit-in-your-stomach feeling after finding out you let someone down?
It felt like the wind had been knocked out of me as I read through an email from a client, sent to my manager and forwarded to me, describing how I had let some details fall through the cracks on a project.
A horrible sense of discouragement and embarrassment moved in for the kill.
In the past, I would have welcomed my uninvited critical thoughts to stay a while, resigned to the fact that I must be unable to do anything right!
But not this time; too many hurtful experiences had taught me to recognize failure as an opportune time for my opponent, the devil, to devour me with feelings of inadequacy and shame. This enemy is bent on making me believe that when my best isn’t good enough, I’m not good enough.
Fortunately, times of pain have also included hours of poring over God’s promises, gathering wisdom to deal with this unwelcome intruder. I have learned to be alert to the devil’s schemes and ready to stand against them. In 1 Peter 5:8-9, Peter tells us how:
“Keep your mind clear, and be alert. Your opponent the devil is prowling around like a roaring lion as he looks for someone to devour. Be firm in the faith and resist him, knowing that other believers throughout the world are going through the same kind of suffering” (1 Peter 5:8-9).
After reading the email and letting my thoughts run wild for a few minutes, I knew I had to clear my mind. I asked the Holy Spirit to help me un-clutter my thoughts with the clarity of truth from logistical, circumstantial and spiritual points of view….
Read the rest of this story and what happened in my Encouragement for Today on the Proverbs 31 Ministries blog. But BEFORE YOU go…
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Happy Fall Ya’ll!
I think as women it is so easy for us to try and make it look like we have it all together, at least for me this is true. It is when I begin taking on more than Ican handle and striving for perfectionism and not simply relying on the Lord that I find myself in these situations. I have never stopped to think about though how this gives the devil a perfect chance to feed lies into my life. Thanks for the reminder.
I am the new women’s ministry leader at my church and this truth is something I will need to remember – that my best is good enough in God’s eyes. Praying I’ll always be giving my best to God and his people. Thank you!
My heart so wants to be affirmed by other but I am learning that other people are flawed and can never really affirm me. My affirmation comes from Christ
God is so ‘on time’! Just this morning I was crying (real tears) to God ….why do I struggle with losing weight… I’m so stupid for not getting it. Losing weight is great for everyone else but elusive to me. I then opened the Bible randomly to:
1 Peter 3: 3-4 3 What matters is not your outer appearance – the styling of your hair, the jewelry you wear, the cut of your clothes – 4 but your inner disposition.
God reminded me he loves every part of me, top to bottom, inside and out. This encouraged me to take another step forward instead of wallowing in self-pity. God is so ‘on time’!
Thank you Renee for these encouraging words. God knows when we need encouragement and His timing is always on time! I am and have been going through tough times at work for quite a while now. I have been demoted and my salary cut quite a bit, I am back to where I was 12 years ago, but expected to do the same work. I know that I am not the only one who experiences this and that God is in control and I am thankful I still have a job and benefits. It is just hurts when push yourself to please your boss, everything is placed on your shoulders and you have to ask for approval that you did a good job. Satan is a liar and he and his demons are working overtime on our minds. We just have to remember to pray and turn our eyes on Jesus! God will protect and provide what we need. Thank you again for your devotion today! I needed it!
I seen to be reassured, daily that I am good enough. Because of an abusive childhood, I isolated myself, even from my own children, causing them great pain. As I heal, my oldest does not forgive, tells people I am dead. So through scripture and c devotionals, I am reminded I am good enough, always, a chosen daughter of a King
This devotion touched me in so much that I printed out so that I can be reminded of God’s promises. I have always compared myself to others which in turn just knocked me down more each time. As I have been reading all your devotions it is helping me to take God’s word and replace it with the doubts and fears of satans lies. Not always easy and I still have my pity parties but with God HE picks me up and helps me to learn and move forward. I am so blessed to be on this mailing list. Thanks to all of you who share your hearts and God’s word with me. God bless each of you.
I think we must think of those of you who share and bare your souls with all of us as super human? All of you who are called to this – thank you! And my prayer is that He will remind you every day just how powerful a tool you are through Him!
I guess you could say that I have that perfectionism bully hiding under my bed, like one of the scary monsters that used to make me hide under the blankets – so reading that others struggle with it and seeing what you do to get past these incidences is so very inspiring and uplifting to me! Nothing I can ever do on my own will be enough in this cruel world, but EVERYTHING I do through Christ Jesus is!
Our mental battle I feel is our greatest threat against us…and yes the devil uses that time and time again. For me it is my job, my kids, my life…all the times I have come short of what I thought was the best. But have learned that when those times come to step back look at it through the mirror of God’s eyes praise Him that He loves inspite of the failures around me…and that I learn to lean in on Him. Thank you for your honesty about this you are a blessing.
Oh, how I needed to hear this today. That “roaring lion” has been on the prowl and discouragement has been on the increase. Thanks for the words of encouragement and hope!
I need this reminder today. Feelings of inadequacy & rejection can haunt me. Thankful that Jesus knows my heart.
I needed this today, I struggle with the need to please people and when I fail that negative voice tries to take over and it’s hard to block it out. Thank you for sharing your experiences and showing that God loves us no matter where we’re at in our journey. Have a blessed day!
I recently committed to making a big change in my life with the Lord’s help. My bible study group leader reminder me that when we state out loud our intentions, the devil will often try to throw us off course. This has been so helpful to me. Before I thought it was me and felt like a failure when I messed up. Now, I often tell the devil to get lost and get back on track. Thank you.
Thanks you for sharing. I often feel inadequate and need to be reminded that God is my source of peace.
I have a couple of things to share; the first is about me, personally. I was mentally & physically abused, and wild unfounded stories made up by the accuser to justify his actions. I got to a point of walking on eggshells, afraid to do the least tiny thing wrong, lest I get punished for something I didn’t deserve. After years of struggling, I finally handed it all over to God and let Him heal me. None of the situations I went through were my fault (aside from the staying with that person because of his kids), and I was worth so much more in God’s eyes. And I had so much more to offer to friends, family, strangers to encourage them and uplift them. I was able to walk away and start living the life God intended for me to live.
The second thing I want to share is a family situation…I was asked to help a relative make an important decision about a job & finances. The choice this person had to make was putting themselves in a happier situation and gifting me with their success, but losing some of their own financial security and alienating other family members. The other choice was to stay where they were and keep the peace and financial income, but feel bitter inside. I did not have an answer, other than a strong pull on my heart to pray about it. I asked this person if they had prayed, and the answer was no, they didn’t think of that first. We prayed separately, distanced by many miles, and in just a few minutes, we both had the same answer. God is good. Very good.
I have had those moments when I just couldn’t even breathe the weight of stuff hanging on me. I have to sit back and remember God is for me not against me. I lost a position I could handle because of letting others dictate how I felt about myself. I was a terrible people pleaser and these people were killing me!! It was a long road but I have learned a lot from My Jesus since then. He is the one who dictates my worth and to him I am worthy and loved and I am ok. I thank you for your ministry of Proverbs 31, I look forward to a good word and biblical guidance and have tried to pas on to others..
Thank you for this reminder and encouragement! I have to diligently stay on guard for Satan’s attacks on me in my mind daily. I did not struggle with this until I was in my 50’s. What a battle! But thanks be to God that through the Holy Spirit’s help he can be kept at bay.
So needed to hear this. I struggle daily with this. And my daughter so struggles with self worth and trying to find her way in life it scares me. I would love to receive a copy to share with her. God bless your ministry.
Every thing I do has to be perfect, in my eyes. Maybe not perfect but done a certain way. My husband can do a job right and get the same results but I think it’s wrong because he did the process different. I’m sure this is called Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder. This isn’t the best situation as I am a SAHM to a three year old boy, 2 year old girl and a 3 week old girl. God has been working on my control issues a lot, more so in the last few months. I’m up at 4 am feeding my youngest when I read this blog. It’s a reminder to me that God hasn’t forgot about me even when I feel like he has. That he is using others to speak to me. That he knew I would read this. Some days can be worse and my husband feels it but I know I’ve come a long way thanks to God.
I see my mistakes glaring with every typo on my blog… every misspoken word when I’m teaching. I have to constantly remind myself, “There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” Romans 8:1
thank you for this devo. I have read “The Confident Heart” book 3 times! Guess that shows how much I need it! My husband is leading us in a new direction with our Sunday night group and the challenge is to seek the leading of the Holy Spirit, even if we are some times misunderstood. A note of success: My daughter and I hosted a baby shower for a dear friend and the inviation was for 48 plus a blanket invitation to our church! we started with a lengthy food list and as time and money and energy progressed (or digressed) we had to decide NOT to make the cute little hand cutout cookies for favors. Although did not want to disappoint, it was the wise and right decision. Shower went very well without those cute little cookies that would have put me way over the edge! Great feeling to have made a wise decision. thanks
I went through a period where it felt like I was failing everyone around me, all the time. God really used that time to show me that His grace really is enough…
So needed to hear this today! Thank you!
I’m finding “perfection” trying to keep everyone happy, pleased etc…leads me to a complete loss of peace because I don’t always measure up..others disappointment in me leaves me feeling inadequate and replaceable..
I have tried to please some family members, only to be hurt. I have realized I cannot please everyone. In doing so, some will not have anything to do with me because I would not take sides! We are family and should stick together, Pray together. My family is split and yes for a good reason, but I got stuck in the middle. I am happy to know, that I really only need to please God!! I might have lost some family, but I will never lose God, my Father who is Faithful and never will leave us!!
I believe we are our own worst enemy sometimes…I could so identify with this post! From being raised in a dysfunctional home, since coming to Christ I used to fight almost a daily battle with the “Not Good Enough” monster. I found myself over achieving and over scheduling, looking to others for confirmation of my self worth instead of my creator. The good news is, I figured out a few years ago that God passionately loves me, just the way I am, and I don’t have to do everything perfectly anymore…what a joyous, liberating truth!
Thank you for your daily dose of inspiration! God bless you!
Oh, it is so easy to fall in the trap of feeling that you are not good enough when you are in the work world, sometimes when you feel that your family is let down – you can feel that you are not good enough.
Then, I have to take time apart from everything and spend time in His Word and let God speak to me through scripture and just being still to listen to God speak to you.
It is so true that Satan can use failure to keep us in bondage. Often we remember our wrongs, longer than anyone else does. We need to truly learn how to leave our confessions at the cross, and not pick them back up. Thank you!
Thank you Renee, I needed that today. Trying to remain steadfast in Him.
Recently as the enemy pressed down hard on me, my friend asked me to encapsulate in one phrase how I felt about myself. The phrase I came up with was “not good enough.” When I read your post this morning I thought of that discussion and how I desperately needed to feel good enough. I realized the only way I could do that is through the Lord and His love. Thank you for all you do to help keep us on the right track!
It is amazing to me how so many people, for whatever reason, find fault with anything that someone else does or doesn’t do.
I truly believe if there is a situation that needs commenting we should FIRST – pray, SECOND – give God time to answer and THIRD – comment. Not in reverse order!
I personally am very blessed and impressed with all that you are a part of….teaching, writing and speaking.
May God richly bless you now and always in every endeavor you do for Him.
Juanita Shelton
So many times we do as women feel that if we fail at something we’ve let everyone down. God is the only person we need to please. And I like the words that was spoken above start to have negative feelings about myself and have my pity party. Wondering why am I here? What’s my purpose? But then I realize that God has a plan for me. And I know that as a mother and a wife that is an important role that God has given me. Thanks you for the words.
My biggest hurdle is just feeling like I never do my best. I have to remember to take more time with God to be at my best with Him is to be at my best with everyone else.
This is me to a pin point – I constantly think about how I potentially made someone feel – do you see “potentially” …I often don’t even know that if I have hurt someone, yet I get so sick feeling that I may have that I analyze over and over until I’m blue in the face what I did, what I said, how I hurt them and I end up really honestly hurting myself more. I’ve put up so many walls around me because of this because I’m afraid of people getting mad or being hurt and I stifle my own emotions along the way – but something has to change and this post has give me the courage to realize I’m not alone and that I do not have to live in this purgatory!
I can fully relate to feeling like my best isn’t good enough for others and then suddenly doubt that anything I do and worse all that I am is suddenly called into question because of another’s comment. I honestly struggle with telling myself that I am always worthy in God’s eyes. I have fibromyalgia and many times I have to turn down offers, change plans, and just stop completely because I physically/mentally can’t go on until I rest. I don’t look sick on the outside and so sometimes I think people question if I’m just making excuses. Maybe that’s a lie I tell myself too! I always give my best, but often it isn’t enough to others. I want to stop the crazy insanity of believing Satan’s lies and change my thinking to where I can walk through the truths and not let things people say (or don’t say) pull me down to where I feel bad about myself. God created me and is crafting me, so how can I believe that He doesn’t know what he’s doing! Get behind me Satan!!
This is a struggle spoke to my heart. When I take the time to pray my heart out before Jesus, and really wait and listen for His voice, I am always encouraged. My own fears and doubts make me question who I am in Christ! So grateful that Jesus never changes!
Thank you for these beautiful words. Far too often, I allow my negative thoughts to overtake me and drown me in words of pain and sorrow. And it’s no fun! Your words are always encouraging and pointing to God’s direction. And reminding me to find the truth from Him, not those harsh words whispered from the evil one. Thank you!
Thank you for the timely reminder! I struggle with perfectionism and feeling like I have to be perfect to be loved, by others and God. Of course, I fail on a daily basis and the cycle continues. Grace, grace, beautiful grace.
thank you for reminding that I only have to “look” good in God’s eyes……..I don’t have to fit in at work or live up to my kids’ expectations. As long as I live for God and do as he expects me too than I am “good enough”.
Renee, I was with two girlfriends at the Reaching Women’s Conference in Findlay, Ohio last week and we loved your presentation. Your story with all the challenges, blessings and burdens is inspirational, we loved you so much! It was if a good friend was speaking to us, thank you for using God’s gift and sharing with us all. I purchased your Confident Heart book and would love to win the devotional to go with it. That said, your devotion is wonderful and timely. Our church and small group is having an 8 week Transformed Campaign, a Rick Warren study, and this week’s study is Mental Health. I have shared your devotion with our group, it is just perfect to keep us in His word and thinking about our studies today. God bless you and your family, your ministry is touching lives.
When I finally realized, deep in my heart and soul, that doing my best really was good enough for God, it was incredibly freeing. As a life long perfectionist, who had been afraid to try new things if I didn’t know how to do them (just a bit silly really) for fear of not doing them well, my new understanding of ‘good enough’ was a gateway to try new things in life, parenting, work, etc.
And, the concept of ‘good enough’ is so easy for me to extend to others now. Seeing them as fellow children of God, no matter what their relationship with God is, has helped me be more supportive and encouraging to others.
This devotion just confirms to me that God is revealing to me that I have to stop worrying about pleasing others. I have struggled with people pleasing. But that happens to pull the best of me from my husband and family. They get my leftovers. And that’s not pretty. Thanks for your post. It is confirmation of so things I need to tweak and things I have to let go!
Your Blog, always seems to come at the right time. As a mother of two that works full time, I feel some days
that my best will never been enough, thanks for the reminder that It is in Gods eyes.
Trying to keep my mind steadfast on Him. Isaiah 26:3
Thank you for reminder in this devotion
The feeling of not being enough has been my companion most of my life. I have a solid faith and a biggish personality, so people probably have no clue I struggle so much inwardly with feelings of self-condemnation. Something like a mistake at work, or disappointing a child or my husband, sounds the battle cry for the enemy and “its on” inside my head. I tell myself things I would NEVER say to anyone else: no grace, no patience, no love… just condemnation.
After year’s of battle, I’ve realized I don’t have to be enough because I have the Holy Spirit within me and He is Enough. But, I still have to live and that doesn’t stop the attack or the patterns of self-condemnation. When I make a mistake or notice the voice of criticism in my head, my go to verses are Romans 8:1 and Zephaniah 3:17. I remind myself that, in Jesus, there is no condemnation; consequences, of course, condemnation… never. He is my, ever-present, mighty warrior; my defender. Regardless of my performance, Jesus rejoices over me, He is ready to quiet me with His love and He takes great delight in me.
If that is true… then one mistake then I can move on. Who am I to argue with Jesus?
I have to remind myself daily that God thinks I am perfect because the devil tries to tell me something totally different.. My life has been one failure after another. Two divorces, bankruptcy, single motherhood and still struggle financially. I am 52, and I play the devil’s compare game and look at friends with their beautiful homes (I rent), their happily together families who get to travel and seem “successful.” Thank you God for the Holy Spirit that over rides those thoughts and reminds me my success is not on this side of heaven. I wouldn’t trade my struggles for anything because where I am weak, HE is strong. Everyday I fall more in love with HIM.
thank you for the reminder that we are great in the eyes of the Lord. I just went through a separation and felt like I was a complete failure. Through this reading I am reminded that I am not and that I am loved. Thank you for your ministry and the 7 day doubt diet. It is a. Blessing,
Thank you for this sweet reminder. I battle taking my thoughts captive and not letting the foothold of defeat and negativity to settle in my thoughts. I have posted verses, on my phone lock screens or on post-its at my computer at work, that remind me of the TRUTH that helps to turn my thoughts from assuming the worst to hopeful for the best. Psalm 23:6a (MSG) is HUGE to me: Your beauty and love chase after me every day of my life. This helps me remember that no matter what is done to me, said about me, how I have missed the mark or just having a down day, the Lord loves me and pursues me in the midst of my mess.
I guess at some point in time we have all been hurt by comments that seem unfair or unwarranted. But this made me wonder how many times it was my words that spoke hurt into another’s life. How many times have I failed to lift others up because I choose to judge instead. I pray when that does happen to have the conviction I need so I can confess my sin. Maybe there are times I’m not hard enough on myself. How great it is to know that even through our failures we have a God who still loves us. Lord, help us all that failure doesn’t become the lie we use to define our self..
My earliest memories of not measuring up are from the first grade playground. I lived my life in that place even through salvation, until the day Romans 8:1 became real to me by the power of the Holy Spirit. Ever since, I have been able to live mostly guilt-free, able to move on. There is only so far down I can fall because GOD holds me up with His love and forgiveness. I’m OK because He knows me in and out, the deepest recesses of me, and has accepted me as His child anyway. For that, I am eternally grateful!
How satan works to discourage us.
Thank you