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“What a [woman] desires is unfailing love …” Proverbs 19:22a (NIV)
I had everything I wanted yet felt empty and confused.
My life was full of relationships and accomplishments I’d worked hard to gain, but none could fill or fulfill me.
Frustrated by my aching emptiness, tears streamed down my face as I thought about the guy I dated through high school and college. Our future plans had crumbled under the pressure of me expecting him to be all I needed.
I had been crazy about him — a little too crazy.
Like the time a friend mentioned my ex-boyfriend was heading to our hometown for the weekend. We worked near each other, so Friday afternoon I parked by his office and waited for him to leave.
We both “happened” to be at the same fast food restaurant, at the same time and bumped into each other. After getting my order, I got in my car and followed behind him, hoping he’d see me, realize he couldn’t live without me and signal to pull over so we could talk.
Seriously, what was I thinking? As you can guess, he never stopped. I was hopeless and humiliated…
A few weeks later, I was taking a walk around my college campus. My eyes drifted to the buildings, dorms and other landmarks of memories. Suddenly my mind filled with a collage of faces, reminding me of my efforts to win the approval of advisors, friends and professors — hoping their affirmation could fill my emptiness.
Although I was graduating soon, had a few great job offers and achieved success in many ways, my heart still felt restless. And I couldn’t help but wonder: Why was all that I had never enough?
A thought rushed through my soul, stringing together two words I had never put next to each other. I sensed God answering me.
Renee, all you have ever wanted is unconditional love.
Unconditional love? I didn’t know there was such a thing. Then God whispered into my soul: You’ll never find the love you long for in anyone or anything but Me. I AM the unconditional love you’re looking for.
The thought of God loving me without any conditions was inconceivable, yet something deep in my soul told me it was true. I’d been looking for love that didn’t have to be earned. Love I didn’t have to fear losing.
Honestly, it was hard to see how God’s love could fill the emptiness in my heart. It took time, but I came to understand that God created me with that need for fulfillment so He could meet it.
Proverbs 19:22a, says, “What a person desires is unfailing love.”
The word “desire” comes from the Hebrew word ta’avah, which means: to greatly long for, deeply desire or crave. Interestingly, unfailing love is mentioned over 30 times in the Bible, and not once is it in reference to a person. It is only attributed to God.
Could it be that God gave us a desire for unfailing love, because He knew it could lead us back to Him?
If today’s post resonated with you, I hope you’ll ENTER TO WIN (This giveaway has ended, but I’d still love to hear from you!)
a copy of my new Confident Heart Devotional. I truly believe the stories and truths in it will change your life {like they have mine}!
Based on honest struggles we all have with comparison, self-doubt, fear of failing, and the life-changing lessons God’s taught me and ten other women, {whose stories are in the book} you will discover how to change the way you feel by changing the way you think – which will transform the way you live!
Expanding on what readers of my first book LOVED most: “When I say … God says …” statements, I’ve written 60 new devotions and new {WISGS} statements to equip you with a new a thought map and a promise – to live in every day!
ENTER TO WIN (This giveaway has ended, but I’d still love to hear from you!)
Share your thoughts in the comments below to WIN one of 5 copies of my A Confident Heart Devotional or a copy of The Five Love Languages: Singles Edition for you or a friend. Be sure to let us know which book you’d like to win!
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I AM IN THE CENTER OF THIS RIGHT NOW. In the last 6 months I have taken my life from peace to total Kaos because I sought the love of a man over the love of God. My Father warned me in His Word about the character of the man I married, yet I did not believe Him and went ahead with the marriage. In seeking forgiveness and answers in prayer, the Holy Spirit revealed to me, ” You wanted to believe in your husband more that you wanted to believe in me.” As events have unfolded I am now married to a man who has stage 3 lung cancer, MRSA staph infections and an active addiction to crack cocaine. How foolish we are as women, continuing to look for affirmation and love in flawed human beings! I still do not understand how God can fill the flesh desires of a women. I know the enternal things are more important than the temporary desires of the flesh, but as humans and as women who have the need to be loved by another male human, it is difficult to conceive and get past the flesh of the satisfaction of holding hands, taking walks together, making love or being able to look into your husbands eyes. All temporary I know, but purhaps this is the curse from Eve. “and your desire shall be for your husband” ? When a desire for human love takes you to places of disobedience against God, it is a horribly painful place to be. As many have said before me……”If I had it to do all over again…”
I always thought God’s love was based on how good I was or how often I went to confession
And asked forgiveness for my sins. I still look for others to fill the emptyness in my heart, have been
Rejected by many and it causes me to lose a lot of relationships because of my constant need for fulfillment
From others instead of going to God first. I have just started realizing that God accepts me and loves me unconditionally. I have to learn to accept His love and stop expecting people to fill that
Void in my heart. Thank-you! Renee! I really needed this encouragement today.
Janet Daniel
I loved today’s devotional. I have countless times craved an ex boyfriend and done a lot of crazy things for love and almost always without fail my efforts have gone unrecognized. I loved the discussion questions and have caused me to now sort things out with God to recognize what I was wanting from my ex’s and how I can get those things from God. If I win I would like a copy of the devotional.
I have recently joined Proverbs 31. I did an OBS with A confident heart and really learned plenty of tools. My problem is that I have not made it a habit yet to use the tools when needed. I find myself struggling than scraping for the tools. This book is daily not when needed.
“All you have ever wanted is unconditional love.” That validates me at the core. It really is my fault for expecting it where it can’t be found.
The verse from from Psalms was perfect to start my morning! The story reminded me of a young girl I work with and challenged me to pray for her. So many opportunities to minister at work. Your devotional would be a great gift.
I absolutely loved today’s devotional and immediately shared it with my four teenage children. It is my desire that my children have godly relationships beginning with our heavenly Father and his son Jesus. I definitely want them to embrace the unconditional love that God has for us and not to look for love in all the wrong places. Thanks for sharing your story! I would love to win The Confident Heat Devotional. God Bless!
I struggle with looking to others for approval. I need to finish reading “A Confident Heart”.
I would like “The Five Languages of Love Singles Edition”
Thanks!
I loved this devotional today it really spoke into some depthsof my life that have never been spoken to. Sometimes I struggle with accepting any kind of love as I walk through life feeling rejected. I know God loves me, He has called me to great thing but for some reason I cant accept the unconditional part.Though each day I passionately weep with desire for more of His love, or a true revelation of who He is.
Wow….this devotional really spoke to me about why we have that need for unconditional love…..so it will draw me to God!!!!! Trust is a huge issue for me!!!!! I would really love to win one of these books!!
I loved today’s devotional!! So much truth that I needed to hear. I am constantly finding my worth through the approval of others. It’s a good day when I feel everyone liked me or thought well of me. And a bad day when I disappoint people. My emotions can be so up and down because of this imperfect and human roller coaster I am on. I NEED to re-train my mind and heart to find my worth and value in the God that created me. Oh what a relief that would be, if I could only believe it. I really think this book would be a great bible study for me and several of my friends and co-workers that struggle with these same insecurities. I really hope I win 🙂
What a thought provoking post. It mde me look at all the times I expected someone else to fill me and ended up disappointed. God is the only one that can truly give me that fulfillment.
I was asking God in my prayer time this morning………..what is wrong………..why do I feel this way when you have supplied all of my needs…….and then I open my email and here was my answer. I love “God Moments” like this…….He is always in remembrance of me…….thank you for your obedience to God and your calling.
I really needed this devotional today. I have been feeling spiritually and emotionally empty and could not seem to find satisifaction in my daily life. Even though I know that God is all I need and that He has that unconditional love for me, I continue to look for people, things and/or accomplishments to make me feel good about my self. Thank you again for the great Word and devotion. My focus and goal should be to please God and not others.
Although I know that I would benefit from such a read, I believe my teen daughters would benefit so much from reading such a book.
Thank you, for this devotional today! Lately I have had a lot of hurt and disappointment from the people closest to me. This devotional has helped me to realize that I need to focus and go to God more.
So glad that God can fill our need for unconditional love!
Learning the true volume of Gods love seems to be an ongoing process. Some days I get it, some days I don’t. I would love copies of your books. Thank you for encouraging daily..
This was EXACTLY what I needed to hear this morning. Thank you & God for bringing it to me! I would love to win the Confident Heart Devotional. Thanks again!
Your post touched me – I have had a restless heart for sometime…depression I think has a pretty good hold on me at the moment and I often find myself seeking affirmation of others as you mention – to help fill the need for that unconditional love and acceptance. Thank you for the reminder that the one I need to be seeking, is the only one who can make that restlessness – become peace.