There is a longing in the heart of every girl.
A longing to be wanted and pursued.
Each night when I pray for my beautiful girl, I want her to hear me thanking God for who she is and for the gift of being her mom! I want her to know she is wanted and valued. That I miss her when we’re not together. I want her to know she’s not a side-item on my very full plate, but she is my heart’s delight and dessert! And you know what? She’s thinks I’m pretty amazing too?
Well… at least for now.
But I’ve been a mommy before. And I know a day is coming when there will be competition for my girl’s attention.
More than me. More than her daddy. More than her big brothers. One day Aster is going to want a guy to want her, to pursue her, to choose her.
And when it happens, I don’t want to panic and wish I could do something to get her to stop chasing after some guy, hoping he’ll notice her. I want her to know…
She’s already been noticed.
She’s already captured Someone’s heart.
She’s already being pursued.
And even though Aster is only five and a half years old, I’m realizing that now is the time for me to start planting these truths in her heart. But it wasn’t until I read my friend Lynn Cowell’s new book “Magnetic: Becoming the Girl He Wants,“ that I realized I needed help to get started.
Lynn’s new book is for girls (and their moms) to walk alongside and help them discover how to become the best version of the beautiful girl God created her to be. There is so much I love about this message. And that is why I wanted to share with you an excerpt from Chapter One today {and I’ve got 3 copies to give away too!}:
“Why doesn’t he like me? I just couldn’t figure it out.
What is it about me that isn’t as attractive as her? Am I not as pretty? Am I too loud? Are my friends not cool enough? The questions gnawed at me, eating away at my confidence. He had liked me once,; surely I could get him to like me again. There had to be a way.
I was determined to find out what was wrong with me.
Back in my own “wish I were dating” days, my highs and lows depended on whether or not I saw him in the hall; my happiness was determined by whether or not he noticed me. The crush I had was crushing me.
I wish there had been someone who could have helped me…someone who could have helped me understand that the longing in my heart pointed not to my need for a guy, but to my deeper need for something, Someone, even greater.
How I wish I had known sooner that I was created to be loved perfectly and unconditionally, made to have my heart filled each and every day with love from the perfect Man – Jesus.
Then I could have spent my time, energy, and emotions, not on a guy I didn’t have, but on the One I did. I could have moved from obsessing over why I wasn’t wanted to becoming the type of girl a godly guy would want. Not just someone to date but someone he’d want to spend the rest of his life with.
I remember making the list, a gargantuan description of everything I was looking for in the guy I would marry one day. The more powerful list would have described the woman I wanted to become, the woman he couldn’t resist!
What would happen if you made the switch now? Shifted your focus off a guy and onto the Guy?
What if, together, we discovered an irresistible beauty deeper than designer clothes, jean sizes, and flaw-free skin? A confidence so attractive, nothing could cause us to lose it? A glamour simply magnetic?
In my quest to discover true beauty, I began to see gorgeous as much more than the face in my mirror. Gorgeous is not skin-deep but heart-deep, a beauty that develops as my heart discovers and returns True Love.
This beauty, this attractiveness, is found in the girl who has what I call “captivating characteristics”—what the Bible calls “the fruit of the Spirit.” These heart traits are described in Galatians 5:22–23: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.
These magnetic traits are the result, or fruit, of the girl who has given her entire life to Jesus. The girl who spends her emotional energy allowing Him to live His life through her.
But, you don’t have to burn yourself out trying to become perfect. These gorgeous qualities will show up as you spend time with God and He pours His perspective into you!
When you’re “planted” in God, He provides all you need to reach your full potential—to be the best you you can be!
And, instead of chasing after the guy running from you, you’re pursuing the One coming after you. In the process of seeking His heart, you’ll become the amazing individual He designed you to be, a girl who is irresistibly magnetic, beautiful inside and out!
ENTER TO WIN:
Packed with honesty, encouragement and perspective-changing Magnetic, truth by Lynn Cowell,(available at Amazon, B&N, CBD, everywhere books are sold), will empower girls and young woman to reach their fullest potential by focusing on becoming who God made them to be! A girl who reflects God’s love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. A girl who will attract the right type of guy one day: one who loves God with all his heart and who will cherish her!
CLICK “Share Your Thoughts” under this post and ENTER to WIN!
Lynn Cowell is a Proverbs 31 speaker and the author of several books including “Magnetic: Becoming the Girl He Wants”. Her passion is to empower wise women to raise wiser daughters. Her husband and their three children live in North Carolina where they love to hike, raft and enjoy anything that includes chocolate and peanut butter!
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I so needed this as a teenager. I felt like I was a nobody because of people around me who would pick and talk about me. My Loving Mother pass it will be 3 years next month and she raised one of my great nieces who is so lost without her. She confines in me because I was always around helping Mama. I would so love for her to have this book. She’s in the 8th grade and she is still having a hard time accepting her Granny’s passing. I ask your prayers for Kajarian.
Never having a Godly father, I always searched for that fatherly love In all the wrong ways. Not until I’ve grown older did I understand and accept my true Father that I was missing all along. My many years of searching for approval and unconditional love is finally over. I would like to share this book with my 11 yr old daughter.
It is my prayer every day that my daughter (who is just 7) will grow up knowing who she is and whose she is. That loving God and having a relationship with Him must come first. That she is loved by the one who created her and loves her more than anyone – including me. 🙂 I wish I had grown up that way. I spent so much time worrying about boys and who I would marry. No regrets anymore – just thankful for all God has done for me and how he has changed me over the years. I cannot wait to read this book and share it with my daughter!!
The greatest thing we can do for young ladies is to help them to see and and discover were their identity comes from who they are in Christ Jesus. And not from anyone or anything in this world.
My father encouraged me to not “go steady” (45 years ago in my day, that meant dating someone exclusively). He said it was so that when a boy asked me out on a date, I knew that he really wanted to be with me vs. ‘having’ to go out with me each weekend. His real motive was that he knew that when couples become exclusive they run the risk of stepping over the line with intimacy. I never did go steady in high school though many of my friends did (and did cross the line). I would love this book for my two granddaughters.
Along with many others, I too wish I would have know this as a teenager. I have been blessed with 3 beautiful daughters and each of them have also struggled with their own self esteem issues & dating. I feel each of us as we were going through our teen years felt “Mom” doesn’t know anything, so when we were told at that point to seek God first, it wasn’t truly understood and since “mom” said it, we just put it aside. At this point in my life, I have also been blessed with 2 beautiful grandchildren and they are 2 & 3 years old. I really feel this is the time to start letting them know how truly loved they are by our Heavenly Father. Build that love for the Lord now and hopefully it will stay with them not only through their teen years, but through their entire life.
This looks like a great book to share!! I have 3 granddaughters who I would love to share this with. I wish I had had this when growing up. My grandmother was my Christian mentor who I tried to pattern my life after. Now I am trying to leave a legacy for my daughters and granddaughters. Thank you for sharing an excerpt from this book it looks as though it would be worth the purchase.
I would love to share this book with a Friend as she has a 8 yr. old Step-daughter and she just took on her sister-in-law’s 2 boys and 5 yr old daughter. So these are her babies and I think this would be a great book for her to share with the girls. I needed something like this when my daughter was growing into a head strong lady.
Unfortunately, I never received any moral, Godly advice from either of my parents as I was not raised in a Christian home. My Mom was wrapped up in herself during my dating years and my Dad was clueless as to what to tell his teenage daughter about love and boys, etc.
I am very grateful to God that he brought a man into my life who is a God-fearing, spiritual and financial provider for our family. We have 2 biological and 2 adopted daughters (9 & 8) from China. Life has been a blessing due to focusing our goals, dreams and desires of our hearts around God. Would love the book to share with my youngest daughters. You are a blessing, Renee! Thanks for your inspiration! Love, Hugs & Blessings~
I am a mother of 3 daughters. One married with two beautiful chlldren. I being a grandma. It is like my Heavenly Father has redeemed the time for me for those years I felt I lost raising my own children when they were 3 and under. I didn’t know and understand the love of my Heavenly Father, my ‘identity’ IN Christ.
Always in the competition in the ‘middle’ of seven children. My mother was very insecure herself and raised by her mother. Her dad was an alcoholic who left when she was 2 years old. Never to see him again. My mother had a lot of issues unresolved as my father did also. My dad fought in the Korean War and was badly injured and emotionally scarred by it. He was an alcoholic and suffered with PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) which was not diagnosed for years. They met shortly after he had come back from the war to recuperate from his injuries. Then they were married.
I do remember my mother taking us to church every Sunday. My father never came even though he was raised as a child in the church. We didn’t talk about that. “Do as I say not as I do.” Which gave very mixed confusing messages.
I saw religion but never really understood a personal relationship with my Heavenly Father until I was married and had 3 children of my own. Didn’t know my identity in Christ. I was always looking for acceptance.
I made many mistakes raising my daughters over the years. I have learned and am learning about the Love of my Heavenly Father and His infinite grace, mercy, love and hope.
I wish I had this book years ago when raising my daughters. I have the opportunity now to walk the talk with my daughters as they are young women and with my grandchildren. I thank my Heavenly Father for His GREAT LOVE and FORGIVENESS. I thank Him for the Body of Christ.
I would love to be able pass this wisdom and blessing on to them.
Blessings to you
What a fantastic book – I wish I had known these things as a teen. Even though my daughter is 23 – she struggles with her male choices – oh how I would love to study this with her!
I always knew as a child God loved me, but after being sexually abused by my older brother, my self worth declined. I tried very hard to teach my daughter, who is now 23, how special she is & how much God loves her & has a special husband chosen just for her. I am still working on these lessons! My hearts desire is to also mentor my 2 great-nieces (the granddaughtera of my brother) so they do not have to suffer horrible acts as well. Praise God for His love and grace.
We went to church as a family growing up, but, really didn’t talk about the Bible or God at home, or were we encouraged to pray for Godly men! 🙁 I would like so much better for my daughter!! I am praying for her future husband, if there is to be one, now! 🙂
I wish I had know as a young girl that God was who I was searching for. It would have saved a lot of heartache. At times now I can still feel my heart tugging to search for that perfect mate when Christ has already been that for me. I have a 19 year old daughter that this book would be a blessing to. I pray the man we both are destined to meet will find us instead of us seeking. Blessings
I need this book for my granddaughter. And for myself. We have this 13 yrs old girl living with us and she is so unhappy and hard to talk to. As a grandmother that never has had girls around, I don’t know what to say or how to lead her in the right direction. I need lots of God’s teaching.
This sounds like a great book! Something that my daughter and I should go through together!
I was told to not settle for someone who just liked me. When I met my husband I knew he was the one God sent for him. He was head over heels and not afraid to show it. But he wasn’t possessive. He was happy to have me pursue my goals and dreams. We truly are a team. I’m so thankful that I waited for him.
Wish this book was around when we moved onto a Bible college campus back in the 60’s. I was 16 and had to go by the college rules along with my parents! I probably would have an easier life, but there was no one to coach us through this move. I think this book would be great for my daughter who has a daughter of her own. My daughter and her family are not living for The Lord and I Pray for them daily. Thank you!
Having 3 girls, I pray they have the confidence to know who they are in Christ and a desire to lean on Him. I know that if I had this type of mindset, I would have viewed life experiences differently. Each experience shapes us and life would be so much easier if we had God’s plan in mind. Of course, all things happen for a reason, and God’s perfect plan.
Sure wish I had this when I was a teen. However, 45 years later after trials and heartaches, I am blessed with a wonderful man. I would love to have this book, though, to share with my young adult daughter that has been burned too many times. This excerpt in today’s devotion could not say it better. Thanks for sharing!