It had been a really terrible, awful, hard day. So hard that I sat and cried. And yet, it brought me to the end of myself. And that was a good thing.
When I finished crying, I sat down to do some work and happened upon a story about Andrew Carnegie that completely changed my perspective as a mom and as a child of God.
Andrew Carnegie was the wealthiest man in America in the early 1900s, so wealthy that he employed over 42 millionaires. When asked how he developed these men to become so valuable that he would pay them that much money, Carnegie explained that “men are developed the same way gold is mined. When gold is mined, several tons of dirt must be moved to get an ounce of gold, but one doesn’t go into the mine looking for dirt — one goes in looking for gold.”
I’d been buried in the dirt that day. I was lost in the monotony of motherhood and felt like my days had no meaning. My discouragement and feelings of failure as a mom left me so disappointed in myself. And I was convinced God felt the same way about me.
I started wishing I had a gold-miner in my life who could see beyond my mistakes and find the gold in me. That’s when God whispered to my heart, “Renee, I am that gold-miner. You are the one who is so critical of yourself. You are the one who focuses on your faults. But I see the gold of My image in your heart, and I want to bring it to the surface so your kids can see Me in you.”
As I sat there trying to process what God was whispering to my heart, stories from the Bible started flooding my thoughts helping me believe that God really does see beyond who I am to who I can become.
That day God used His thoughts to give me a new perspective – of Himself and of myself. Then He challenged me to look for ways to transfer that perspective to my children.
It’s easy to get buried in the dirt of discontentment, disobedience and discouragement. You may even be thinking, Where’s the gold in it all? I wondered, too. But after reading Carnegie’s story and hearing God speak to my heart, I wanted to become a gold-mining mom.
As I thought about the gold I wanted to see in my children, character traits of Christ such as patience, kindness and contentment came to mind. I decided to make a list of golden attitudes and actions and look up Bible verses we could learn together. Then I made gold nuggets by balling up foil and spray-painting them gold.
In the following weeks, each time my kids showed a golden attitude or action, I’d reward them. When they saved up enough nuggets, they’d get a special treat. We also found new character traits and Bible verses, wrote down ideas to live them out and started making them part of our family devotions.
It took time for me to embrace a grace-based parenting perspective and let God’s new truths sink in. But I was so excited about having a spiritual focus as a mom. I started getting creative and about finding time in the midst of my busy days to get into His Word and get His word into me. And as I did, He used His thoughts to re-shape mine.
God’s Word became a part of our everyday lives as He taught me to take my eyes off of my children’s habits and focus on their hearts. Not only did it change my kids’ attitudes and actions, it changed me, too. For the first time in months, I was excited about my role as a parent. God had given me a new perspective, and a whole new sense of purpose as a mom!
Lord, thank You for not focusing on the dirt in my life but seeing beyond who I am to who I can become. Help me believe that, receive that and give it away to my kids, my husband and my friends. Help me look at their hearts and encourage the glimpses of You that I see in them. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
Portions of this post are in my book, A Confident Heart.
Copyright 2011. Baker Publishing. All rights reserved.
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I liked the voyager go Bible so that you could load additional things. I would give the first one to my almost thirteen year old daughter who really loves the Word but needs encouragement from the Word right now to fill her heart.
The second one I would give to my ten year old daughter who is filling her heart with the Word right now. She would really use it and take care of it. I know she would share with her little sisters and that would make it more precious to them. She would also find scriptures to share with me and faithfully remind me to listen to them. 🙂
I just found you today! I am so excited to find such a source of encouragement in my walk. I can't wait to share your resources with others.
Thank you Renee for sharing the new perspective God has given you. It has truly been a blessing to me and an answer to prayer. You see I had been asking God to help me in Mothering my child since I have felt totally unequipped and had not been raised in a Christian home nor my husband. God had been speaking to me this year about being a purposeful parent to my child. I had the worse Mothers Day ever and accounted to my own failures of being a Mom. The Law of reaping & sewing. Anyway, if I was to win the gift set, the Voyage Bible sounds great. I would share it with a friend who is also raising a daughter. I praise the Lord for speaking to your heart and thank him for your obedience in sharing.
Blessings,
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Wow – God's timing is amazing.. I just read the Proverbs 31 devotion & it spoke to me.. I'm a single mom of 2 wonderful boys, but lately I've been questioning my parenting.. Just yesterday I was thinking about my "pink slip" – but as a MOM you can only think those thoughts for a short time, then have to get over it & move on & be there for your kids..
I think it's really in my face right now because I've been asked to speak at my church in 2 weeks about being a single parent & that's made me really think about what I do..
Thank you for your words of wisdom, they will help me feel better about who "I" am!
I'm not familiar w/ GoBible (but will look into it soon). I would share this great gift w/ my neice who is a young mom..
Thank you,
Stefani
What perfect timing, as God usually has.. I've been having a hard time the last few days – i've actually had the "I want to Quit" thoughts.. NOT in the sense of quitting my life, just the responsibilities that comes w/ motherhood & single motherhood.. I know this blog was from last week, but today wsa the right time for me to read it!! So thank you for all that you do..
I"m unfamiliar with GoBible, so I cant say which one I like at this time, but I will go look into it.
If I'd entered this on time & won, I'd give the other gift to my neice who is a young mom!
Stefani
I love hearing your encouraging words! It's very comforting to know that there are other women out there dealing with the same issues of Momhood and Life that I am.
If I won, I'd pick the GoBible Original and give the other to my wonderful Mom, a true woman of God : )
Thank you so much for that devotion. I always felt like I was the only one who would ever want to "quit". If I won, I would give the second one to my sister-in-law, who was instrumental in leading me to Proverbs 31 Ministries. I would love to have the GoBible voyager. It just seemed to have just what I would need. Thanks so much. Michele I
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Go Bible Voyager NIV
Wonderful post. This was my first Mother's Day since the tragic death of my son 10 months ago. We take so much for granted. I used to have many days where I wanted to quit. Now I can't imagine that. I treasure each moment with my daughter good and bad.
Hello, My name is Hazel
Iknow exactly what you mean,I have been going through a tough time with my 10-year-old son. He is normally a straight "A" student but lately he has not been turning in homework and becoming very disrespectful. Everyone keeps telling me it's his age but I just keep praying that things will get better.
i would love to have the GoBible. my email address is [email protected]
I don't think I've reached the point of wanting to quit, but boy do I have days that come close! 🙂 BUT GOD! He is so faithful and strong and loving and the best leader and carrier when I fall down! Thank you for your encouraging words!! God is doing some new and exciting things in me and I'm so excited!
My sister is an amazing woman and busy mom of 9! She would be who I would bless! 🙂
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Many blessings back to you Renee for all your pour out to us!!
I liked the devotion. I like the go bible voyager. I would give the 2nd one to my mom.
angela7777(at)juno(dot)com
I love the idea of all of this. I desire that the Lord transform me into the self-less momma and wife that He has designed me to be. I love the Character Chart as well. I would chose the Voyager. Thanks for the opportunity.
AMY RUTH
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Renee, your devotions & blog posts are really just what I need…I have wanted to quit my job as Mom many times in the last year. Thanks for the encouragement! I want to study what you learned from God. If I receive the GoBibles I would like the voyager if I could download Bible messages to it. Otherwise the original would work well. I'd give the second one to my Dad so he could hear scripture (he has read the Bible every morning for as long as I can remember) or else to one of my young Mom friends. Thanks again.
I am just completely wore out on parenting. I was at my breaking point at lunch today. Crying and praying to God that I coulnd't do this anymore. My kids receive the short end of the stick everyday because I am wore out when I get home from work everyday and my husband refuses to consider letting me stay home with them because what if…. It breaks my heart. I feel like all the kids hear from me everyday is criticsm and yelling at them. The few hours I get to spend with them maybe i am just looking at dirt instead of gold. It doens't matter to me which Go Bible I would get everything you have in that pack would be helpful for me and my kids. Every single one of my friends work and raise their children, i have an unlimited supply of friends to give the second set to if I win. Thanks
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What a cool little gadget! I would love the original version and would give the other one to my friend Tammy…she has the same struggles as I do with full time work and a young child.
I am a recent subscriber to your Proverbs 31 ministries and it came at a great time…we just recently lost my aunt and uncle in the Mississippi tornados so my mom and I have really clung to Gods word. Proverbs 31 ministries has been a blessing, I have been able to find something to apply everyday. Any of the GoBibles would be wonderful to have and my mom would receive the other one. [email protected]
Thank you doesn't even begin to tell you how encouraging this devotion is to me. My boys are no longer toddlers, but the struggles seem to only increase as they grow older. They are so greatly influenced by my spouse, who was raised in a christian home, but chooses not to follow a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, and I feel as though I am running in to a brick wall at times. I would choose the original GoBible, with the 2nd for my friend and single mom, Tonya.
I was just starting to read your article about quitting which is how i've been feeling lately,when my son interuppted me and apoligized for something he done and said the other day. That was a great moment. Your gift pack would be a great help the go bible voyager would be a great help, with 7 kids and a busy husband i feel i'm always on the road to somewhere or something. The one i'd give,would probably be a friend who is expecting who also has a 1 1/2 yr daughter recovering from brain cancer and a 3 1/2yr daughter.
Thank you! I have been feeling down on myself alot lately, and found your wonderful blog this evening after begging God for guidance. If chosen to win, I would choose my best friend, Greta, as the other recipient–Original NIV please. After years of infertility treatments, God has led them down a wonderful new path this past 6 months. They became foster parents, and, even more, they will soon finalize adoption of their wonderful boy!
[email protected]
Thank you! I have been feeling down on myself alot lately, and found your wonderful blog this evening after begging God for guidance. If chosen to win, I would choose my best friend, Greta, as the other recipient. After years of infertility treatments, God has led them down a wonderful new path this past 6 months. They become foster parents, and will soon finalize adoption of their wonderful boy!
[email protected]
A friend forwarded me your devotion today and boy did it hit home! I have a newborn and my older son has been having quite the adjustment. Your devotion came at the perfect time. I would choose the Voyager and would give the 2nd one to a dear friend of mine.
I have now subscribed to your newsletter and sent you a friend request on FB.