Today is another day where I can’t just write what I want to say – I need to “show and tell” you. In today’s short video message below I share how God walked me through a process of looking back with courage – so I could move forward with hope. He helped me identify things I didn’t even know were affecting me and gently led my heart on a journey towards freedom – showing me how to of let go of the pain from my yesterdays so I could live with confident hope in my todays… and tomorrows.
{Are you a note-taker? If so, I created “Video Message Notes” in a PDF format here or in a MSWord doc here, just for you. Even included key verses and blanks to fill in.} 🙂
Today’s Giveaway:
I’m giving away 3 Confident Heart gift packs for 3 of you. Each one includes a copy of my book, A Confident Heart {for you or a friend?}, my “Rest Assured” message on CD and a Starbucks gift card!
Let’s Connect {and how to enter today’s drawing}:
I’d love to hear how God speaks to you through today’s video message… and this is an easy way to enter today’s giveaway too. Just click “share your thoughts” right below this post and do just that. I’ll be here reading and praying over each of you and your stories. {Also, I know the timelines I encourage you to create might sound overwhelming or scary, so I recorded a little video message to talk/walk you through that process – If you’d like to hear more click here to watch it after you share your thoughts below.}
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Your message is so true and a truth I’ve recently experienced. My son was killed in a car accident at the age of 19 and his death changed my life. My soul was pierced and I no longer knew who I was without my child. God set me on a journey of discovery that included examining the relationship I had with my own mother which had always been troubled. God allowed me to remember the hurts, recognize how those hurts had affected me, accept my mother’s imperfections, forgive and love her and in doing this, forgive and love myself. Because I stepped out of the shadow of bitterness and hurt and into the light of God’s truth and grace, my mother and I are close and our relationship is healed. I’ve let go of the lies Satan whispers in the dark shadows that I’m not loved, not good enough, not worthwhile, will never be successful. God shows me His truth and gives me the courage to face the darkness of my hurts in order to walk with Him in the joy of His light and the hope of a future He has intended for me.
This is wonderful. I have always had low self esteem. I always struggled in school and never felt good enough to do better. I am working on it day by day and I will be 34. I have an 8 year old son and he has bad speech delay andi am trying to help him as i read your book.along with helping myself. The Lord is amazing .
Your post has encouraged me to go to the library and check out this book. I’m so in this place you describe and I want to be able to move on. I know it’s possible because that’s what God promises, I just don’t know how! Thanks for sharing.
Renee- Thank you for the devotional. I have been working through trusting God with the issues I had growing up and the even bigger ones that surfaced 2 years ago. I had a father, but he was not a loving one. He was an overbearing, controlling person who could never tell me he was proud of me. I spent all my school years trying to please him. For example, I graduated in the top 10% of my graduating class and often made straight A’s. His comment was always, “well, you could have made an A+, or you could have placed higher”. When my mother was dying, he was intolerable. Afterwards he served me with a legal document to prevent me from having a memorial for her. I could have stayed angry, but I gave it to God, and he gave me peace. I can’t say it was easy, and I did go to a very low place as my heart was breaking, but God showed me Psalm 34:118 – The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. He showed me this after I cried for 3 days and 2 nights. I then felt peace and began to heal. I am still working on it, but I know with God I can. I want to read your book.
Thank you for sharing your hope … I am a recent widow and am stuck in my grief but your words “keep us from experiencing all that God has for our tomorrows” so applies as I wonder what God has in store for my today and tomorrows … and what purpose He has in this journey. I have struggled with my past and the hurt and fear from relationships and the isolation and I know that is not God’s plan but it “feels” easier to run away from it. Thank you for your ministry.
Lorraine, I’m sorry for your Loss. I won’t tell you that I know your grief, but I do understand what it’s like to be a widow. I was widowed when I was 27 with 5 small children to raise. I remarried, but that husband was also killed. I was in my late 30’s. Now as I look back, I know I have survived by the Grace of God. Stay close to God and our Savior Jesus Christ. Virginia
as soon as i read your post on Proverbs 31 tears filled my eyes. I am currently in a womens group that focus on healing from our past. I have been so scared of looking into my past out of fear that i migh just fall apart of what i find. I have been so numb to my feeling for many years that alowing myself to feel is very scary. i know that coming accross your website is no coincident. God has a plan and the time to face my fears is now. God is such a gentle God that he has been working with me throught these last couple of years to prepare me for today. I will be subscribing to your email and know that i am not alone as i face into this journey.
I read the daily Proverbs 31 message and watched the video. It is truly amazing how God works with the people of His kingdom to give me the words that I need. I had a conversation with a friend of mine yesterday about our fears, wants, promises not met yet and peace. I too felt that my past had hindered me from the outcome of I things that I want in life. I haven’t always been peaceful at waiting for God. I thought if I could “control” or “help” God out in different situations in my life, I would get what I wanted. However, every time that I did that, I could never get the result I was looking for. Like you said, I was disappointed and hurt because it didn’t work out in my favor.
So many of the things in my life that I had to let go of; my divorce, men, partying, depression, anger, and abandonment. Every now and again, satan has tried to seep into my mind that I am not where I would like to be. But that just isn’t true. The things that I have asked for in life, I have received and not in the form of what I wanted it to be. I asked for a family, and God had blessed me with a wonderful church & “church parents” who love me unconditionally. I asked for peace from my nightmares & singleness. God put activities from church, cooking for many people, and volunteering. I had asked for love to fill my loneliness, and I have to tell you that I have received so much love in the many forms that God could ever show me. I realized something, that I am not alone, that I am loved by Jesus and to keep moving forward with His plan.
I wanted to share apart of my quiet time with you this morning, as I feel led to do so, This morning at about 3:30 am my spirit began singing praises to God. I drempt I was in a cafe around Christmas time and was singing – Although I do not remember all of the words when I woke up these were the words that stayed with me and I thought they were timely for our study. The words were ” You know all of my wants, you know all of my needs. i may not get all of my wants but i do get all of my needs. And what I need is Jesus. Feeling His blood wash over me cleansing me of my sins. Then refreshing me with His living water. Jesus died for my sins and brought me salvation. All I need is Jesus … Jesus… Jesus…”
And after that I awoke. I knew then that it was the Holy spirit speaking on my behalf and immediately prayed as i laid in bed. Thanking God for sending Jesus and the Holy Spirit so i could know Him better and be with Him. I just felt I wanted to share this with my sisters (in Christ)
Hope your day is blessed…
Debi
I thank you for posting this Mrs. Swope because I believe that it will help me to get down to the root of what’s been going on with me. Thank you!
I just read CH 4 and I will honestly say…I am sorry to say it..I haven’t heard the call. I wasn’t a bad kid growing up but I did get into my share of trouble. Boy trouble that is. My husband and I have not been to church in a while. We come from two different religious background and we are trying to find our common ground. I know this is bad and hopefully we will find something soon…I wonder if this is my problem with a lot of other stuff. I do enjoy bible studies….so what is my problem
I’d love to hear how God speaks to you through today’s video message:
I love Jer. 29:11! That is a verse I pray over children. However, God’s plans include everything that has happened in my life! Everything can be used for my highest good. Thank you for the chance to read your book.
Renee, as I listened today to your video, I realized being the eldest girl of six, I didn’t get the attention and love I needed as a child. Also I saw things happening outside my home in other families that we as a family did not do and I felt left out and different. We never did daddy ~daughter dances, never did the school open house, or other school activities done with parents, they were too tired from work or too busy with the younger siblings. So as I listened to you speak, I realized I too was seeking to make up for these things in my husband and my two children, and my life. My husband does not fit the role I wanted my husband to be, I wanted a suit and tie and he is blue jeans and a sweatshirt guy. He is not what I wanted a husband to be and it caused conflict and to this day does still. But after listening to you and realizing I was wanting him to be what I didn’t have as a child I think working through some of these issues may be easier now. But I do see my daughter wanting my husband to be a certain type of dad to her now that she is 34 and I kind of commend her for speaking up and saying to my husband, “Dad, lets go for a walk” and make an effort to spend time with him~~~~~~~~thank you for sharing with us.
Hi Renee, We too have been thru many struggles over the past few years(16) to be exact. From the loss of both sets of parents, a very rebellious child, the same child suffering from cancer, the loss of jobs and many major financial issues. I just cannot list it all. I am at that point in my life where we have had to make so many changes even career changes that I am scared of and hope I have made the right choice. Your message spoke to me letting me know that the changes, difficulties and pain have all led to this point in my life-a hope for the future. That it was in God’s plan all along. Please pray for us that I have made the right choice, that it is all going to fall in place, and pray for me to have the confidence to move forward and to step out of my comfort zone. Thank you!
As I read Ch. 4, two things in particular stood out to me. First, I can relate to feeling God’s call for me to share my story of true freedom from an eating disorder through Christ’s strength. In fact, it is what led me to attend and eventually become a She Speaks “Graduate”. I went to the conference every year seeking support, equipping, and encouragement to write, speak, and lead others by sharing my story. I have been blessed to share my story in front of a small church groups as well as 275+ crowd and regularly write devotions for those who struggle with eating disorders and negative body/self image. However, it is my daily conversations with those around me, those I meet through volunteer work or chance encounters that can only be God-designed, where I feel like God is saying…”This is what you are here for…” At SheSpeaks conferences, I would leave ready to go stand on the mountain top in front of anyone, publish articles and books…shout my hope to the world…Instead, God has asked me to crawl into the quiet places, the dark, lonely, cavernous prisons wherein many of those around me live. To sit where they are, and whisper about the hope and the comfort that God has given me…and let them know God has it waiting for them too.
It is interesting that this has been the way my ministry has manifested itself. At my first SheSpeaks Conference, I was in the prayer room. I noticed a woman from my Speaking Group near me praying. As I left, she came running out of the prayer room, “I need to tell you something…meet me later,” she said. Now I had only met this woman once during our first break out session, I couldn’t even remember her name! Throughout the entire weekend we would have brief encounters, but because of the busy schedule and the fact that I was staying in a different hotel, we did not get a chance to talk. Everytime she saw me she would say, “Don’t forget…i need to tell you something.” On the last day of the conference, I was leaving early to drive back to Florida. As I walked quietly out of the room of 600+ women and headed to the parking lot, I heard her…”Wait!Wait! Don’t leave!!” She happened to have seen me leaving and didn’t want to miss telling me, “When I was praying next to you in the prayer room that first night, God told me to tell you that you were going “undercover” in you ministry…We could not figure out what this meant…but I did not forget this. Now as I work, not only with women who have eating disorders, but also in the fitness industry, I often find myself sharing God’s truth, not overtly in a “mountain top” kind of way, but in a discreet, quiet way…almost “undercover” I guess you could say!!
I am so thankful that SheSpeaks prepared me for the many different ways God has asked me to share my story…and I am blessed to do so, even if it means “setting one more captive free” at a time 🙂
This is my first Bible/book study and I haven’t commented much on these blog posts, but chapter 4 gave me that extra “oomph” I needed to “right a wrong” with someone from my past from about 12 years ago.
I was the one that needed forgiveness – forgiveness from her, from God, from myself.
Without going into full detail, I did/said something to… let’s just call her “K”… that was/is completely out of my character. I hadn’t spoken to “K” since “that night” 12 years ago, but this past Tuesday I told her I was sorry, truly sorry, for what I did. I think she was pretty shocked (and so was I)! She acknowledged that it was a long time ago, that my apology meant a lot to her and that it took courage for me to apologize.
She accepted my apology!
“K” and I are not all of a sudden instant best friends and I may not even ever speak to her again, but I don’t think I would’ve had the courage to confront my shame and embarrassment before reading this chapter (or this book) – my heart is a little more free and on it’s way to being confident!
Apologizing to “K” is just a baby step, but it’s a step.
I’m in my twenties and still trying to figure out what God’s plan is for me? All I want is for Him to use simple me – however, whatever, whenever, wherever that may be! Jeremiah 29:11-13 gives me comfort!
I, too, grew up without a dad – wouldn’t know him if I passed him on the street. I still have WAY bigger issues to deal with (y’all are so BRAVE! I haven’t had the courage to share anything from my past except what I just typed) and my journey of asking for forgiveness, forgiving those that have hurt me and finding the strength to forgive myself is far from over, but I am no longer afraid of my future or of my past because “God promises hope for my future despite the pain of my past!”
A quote I recently came across:
“Down on my knees that’s where I learned to stand, Lord, I can’t even walk without you holding my hand!”
Thanks Renee!
God woke me with a revelation of an event from my past that I always knew and have shared, but today, he showed me how that has impacted my life and I am so very grateful. There is always more healing and deeper layers of it. May God bless each one of us who is reading this book.
One more thing Renee, I too like many of the women have been awaken by God at 3 or 4 am and was prompted/led to open your book. God is truly amazing and I pray that I can help bring healing to hurting men and women.
Renee,
Good morning! I started reading Chapter 4 and things started coming to me from my past and I closed myself off. Thankfully God started showing me what was happening to me. I called my Christian counselor and she along with the Holy Spirit helped me process that God was healing me and trying to get me to a place of heart knowledge instead of just head knowledge. Also, I realzed that knowing the truth and appropriating it correctly is not always easy. However, with God All things are possible to she that believes! I had to keep telling myself I can do all things thru Christ who strengthens me. I am so thankful to God and you for your ministry. Keep bringing healing to hurting women Renee. Keep teaching us how to forgive, how to let go and how to trust God confidantly. We need you and I love you for your honesty and your maskless life!
I woke up at 4am with a heavy heart to watch your video and I thank you for sharing I cried through the whole thing. I am holding my family back, and I’m afraid it might be to late for me to keep my family together my husband abandoned us and the killer is he’s in afganistan so I can’t talk to him but I have learned that it doesn’t matter cause I must get right with God again and his plan and I must accept that no matter how many tears he must wipe. This is a hard one for me but just what I needed. I’m so afraid to leave my home because of an ex domestic abuser and God doesn’t want me to be in fear he wants me to trust he has me and he wants all of me. I hoped that makes sense a lot of abandonment issues obviously. Thanks for your guidance.
Aly,
I married to get away from an abusive relationship with my high school sweet heart. I wanted out of my hometown and I chose the fastest way out. It wasnt the right thing to do but fear can motivate us when we dont trust God. Something I had to come to grips with and be honest with God and myself about. Aly trust God to keep you safe. Read and meditate on Psalms 91:. God keeps me everytime I go back to my home town. I havent seen the high school sweet heart in over 20 years. When I am on the plane I pray and I rest in God. I pray God’s will for your marriage, that your husband will hear from God in Afganistan be obeident as well as be protected over there and that no danger will come nigh you or your husband. God heals and restores allow Him to restore you that is the best gift we can give our families. I will keep you and your family in my prayers. August Rose
I agree with you today… I’ve always struggled with past failures and issues that I probably should have done differently and perhaps the outcome would have been different… It’s very hard to bring them to surface because you think you have forgotten them or you are over them and the pain of re-living the whole thing again just terrifies me… Recently I had to deal with a comeback dealing of anxiety attacks… I battled anxiety for a few months and God healed me of this… I will forever be grateful but recently I started to feel the onset of anxiety and it freaked me out… all of sudden I started to doubt that perhaps God didn’t heal me and I was struggling again…. After praying and bringing this whole thing again before the feet of Jesus He once again reassured me of His love and the peace of mind that calms my anxious heart…. It’s a healing rain that showers me and lets me know…. no matter what I have in the past… I can confront it I can face it and with Christ there is really nothing I can’t overcome…. Thanks for the sweet reminder…. Bless you!!
Dear Renee,
I just discovered this site today, and have truly been blessed! I read the Proverbs 31 every day but have not really had the time to go elsewhere when it directs. Today God led me to your site where you are going through your book “A Confident Heart” and it sounded amazing. When I read that you were giving a free copy of your book and CD away I thought I had to at least try to win it as I can tell it definitely a book that could help me immensely. Your video message really blessed and encouraged me, and I am not afraid of looking at the past . . . regardless of the pain it holds, because I know every time I trust God to take me back He heals me a little more each time and takes me from glory to glory.
Right now, I am going through a very difficult season in my life as my ex-husband molested my daughter when she was only 3 1/2 . . . she just turned 9 this March. So for the past 6 years I have been fighting to protect my daughter. During this time I have been able to, by the grace of God, maintain full custody without my ex-husband having even a moment of supervised visitation. HOWEVER, I just went through a 2 week Trial in February which was brutal, and at the end of the Trial . . . in spite of the hard evidence and evil that was revealed, the Judged ruled sole physical custody to me and joint legal to both of us with a plan for RE-UNIFICATION!!! Needless to say I have been terrified at the very prospect of that ever happening . . . yet, that is what the State of California’s laws state . . . RE-UNIFICATION regardless of what a parent does to their child!!! I really believe God has been calling me to try and change the laws, and I know for the last 6 years He has indeed set precedence in our case . . . and I have to believe He won’t stop now . . . even though with my human eyes I can’t even imagine how God will be able to rescue and protect us from the evil and corruption of our legal system . . . but as long as I have air in my lungs I will keep fighting to protect my beautiful daughter! It has already cost me well in excess of $150,000.00 to date, while my ex-husband has not paid a single dime because he works for the State of California and has free legal counsel through his work!!! Hence all of this has really been taking it’s toll on my precious daughter and me, BUT, I will keep pressing on and TRUSTING the Lord regardless of what it looks like.
When I heard your message and it talked about the past, I cringed at first, then I realized that God wants me to do some more work with regards to my past . . . you see, my ex-husband thought if my daughter ever told me what he did to her, that I would be too afraid or ashamed to do anything about it because I had been molested as a child from the age of 4-13, that was when I finally told someone. What my ex-husband did not count on was that my “love” for my daughter far outweighed all the shame and fear of the authorities (who did nothing to protect me or my sisters when we were little). Needless to say, God has been bringing me full-circle for the past 6 years, and I know that His Word promises me that “What the enemy intends for evil HE intends for good!” That is my life verse and I have seen God redeem so many things in my life and turn what the enemy intended for evil into some not only good, but WONDERFUL beyond words . . . like laying my daughter in my arms as a new born (I adopted her from my best friend who had been in a head on car accident and was left with physical disabilities and a brain injury — her husband was left with the same injuries only from a motorcycle accident — they met in physical therapy)!! You see this is beyond a miracle because I was never able to have children because of the sexual abuse I endured as a child . . . yet, I know today that God created me for such a time as this . . . to protect my daughter!!! Today I am grateful I worked on my issues when I was younger so I would have the strength I now need to fight to protect my beautiful little girl. But as you know, dealing with, and healing from, our past is a “process” . . . one in which God is perfecting and healing us, until the day He calls us home.
As such, I would absolutely love to be the winner of your contest for your book and CD because I really need something right now to help me through this process and cannot really afford it at this juncture in my life as I am and have been buried in legal fees for the last 6 years and do not see an end in sight. So, I will TRUST this into God’s hand, and if this is where He wants me to go next, I will follow and obey.
Regardless of whether or not I win the contest, I need you to know that I am so grateful to you and your Devotionals on the Proverbs 31 website. God has used you in such powerful ways over the past year since I discovered the Proverbs 31 ministry. Thank you for your obedience and faithfulness to God. I pray that the Lord will continue to Bless You and your ministry.
The Daughter of the King,
~ Bonnie ~
Bonnie,
I am praying for you and your daughter. God, bless Bonnie and her beautiful child, heal, make whole, set free and God change or remove her ex-husband in Jesus Mighty Name Amen. August Rose
Jeremiah 29:11 is posted in my office but honestly, I don’t remember reading past verse 11. Thank you for reminding me to read the rest of the chapter and to seek Him for all the answers.
Jeremiah 29;11 keep speaking to me of late, i know that there is a lot of things that i need to process from my past to move forward. I know that i need to trust God completely to bring me to the place He wants to take me .I need a special prayer of deliverance on this one Renee,God bless
Your video spoke to me. Thank you so much.
I have been with Isaiah 61 in preparation for Women’s Day this month- I have learned I need to pay close attention when God brings me His word over and over- Chapter 4 also capture God speaking to me from my study for this year- If you seek me with your whole heart you will find me- I have visited many of God’s seeking me invitation this year-you helped me to see how I need to begin living this invitation daily by surrendering (a struggle for me to do in the manner God would have me to) my plans for His- every time I come to Him, talk to Him and really believe He is listening I get His plans for me, I wasn’t going to do the timeline because I didn’t think I would be able to remember when events occurred when exactly doubt begin to become a part of my life- but your video help- I may not do it the way you intended but I am now open to processing the pain, hurt, disappointments with Christ- the need to move on is far greater than the need to stay in the past- healing looks beautiful- it times to let the ashes go and put on the crown of beauty. Thanks Renee for letting the Spirit be upon you. For finally living Isaiah 61 1-2.
I have beat myself up on a daily basis over so many past mistakes. Recently someone told me that someone from my past will be coming into my space by attending church where I worship. I have not seen this person in many years and the thought of facing them has taken me back over 20 years to a very dark place. I have wondered, why now? What is this all about? Is it a cruel punishment that these consequences live on? Someone reminded me that God does not operate to hurt but to heal. Your message today is confirmation of that. I cannot move on completely until this pain is healed. Maybe I need to stare it in the face in order that its power over me be broken. I appreciate your message and will appreciate your prayers.
I’m pregnant, not sleeping at all, and exhausted every day. I loved in your video when you talked about taking each “day by day, moment by moment, doubt by doubt”, because it is so easy right now to be so easily overwhelmed by all the ways I’m feeling I fall short….and while I have a wonderful husband who keeps reminding me this is just a passing season, I needed your reminder about taking it all “doubt by doubt” and trusting each untruth to Jesus to be rewritten by Him with His truth. If I could only master that for every hour of every day! 🙂 Thank you for sharing your struggles with your past. I find that right now in my state of sheer exhaustion, I revert back to old habits of my own mother when I was a child, because it’s “what I know”. I need to remember that moment by moment, Jesus is molding me into a different kind of mother, one that looks to Him first for her strength and endurance. And I love the reminder that my responsibility is to GO to Him and the Father in prayer, and SEEK the truth!
Really do appreciate your honesty and obedience to share. This is a tough chapter and hope to glean from all that is in store for me as I am open to what God has for me. It would be wonderful to be free from the past and decisions made that affect me today. I am reading your book for the second time and loving it again. I bought copies for every woman in my family and hope to share more with my friends as well. I love the videos you share too. Thanks for sharing.
Chris
Renee mentioned the struggles her daughter is facing in the video. I so relate to that as I had a challenging childhood-i cannot almost imagine my childhood without remembering me and my mother in a doctor’s office. I have a severe to profound hearing loss, have both ADD and Asperger tendendices, and have Type II Diabetes.
I was thinking back to my chihood-trying to identify where it all started. I was around 4 or 5 when this happened-my parents told me that the dr’s came out and told them “she kept telling us I’m going to be okay”
With all the stuff that happened in my childhood, I had the attitude of “I’m going to be okay” from that forward on. I put on a brave front and developed the attitude of i’m going to be okay-for myself because I wanted to be okay in the future. I overlooked alot of things in my adulthood-causing alot of problems, had a couple of online relationships that I’m not proud of.
God revealed that I didn’t depend on him enough to meet my needs in the past and to rely on him even though I do have a severe hearing loss. He revealed stuff today at work-putting my past in perspective.
I thought long
Renee. Wow what a powerful video. The part that resonated most for me was the last section when you quoted from the book directly. This study has been such a blessing. I even had a moment today That would normally make me doubt myself and incorporated some of the promises from the previous download and felt better immediately!!
Renee,
Thank you for being so open and honest with us! When you share your heart, it makes so much sense to me-I have been through similar circumstances; my parents divorced when I was young and I have the same fear of abandonment and trust issues. I also tried to make my husband be the perfect spouse by control. I am working on all these issues, and it really helps to know that other Christian women are going through the same fears and doubts as I am.
Renee,
I want to thank you for sharing your past and, most especially, your hope. I find myself in tears listening to you speak of a past that creeps into your present and how it manifests itself in your behaviors. I’ve fallen into an on again, off again depression since losing my dream job 7 months ago (with the job went my home at a time I was already dealing with an ’empty nest’ and the loss of a close loved one).
I KNOW God has a plan for me; I TRUST in His word; but I have whole weeks of crying that just won’t stop. I’m blessed with awesome women in my church who pray for me daily and anoint me whenever they get the chance :-). I look for His blessings daily and I see them; I just can’t seem to shake an overwhelming sense of being alone. I go to God and cry my heart out and He shows me I’m not alone. But I still can’t shake the feelings. Your message makes me wonder if this isn’t my past coming up to slap me in the face 🙂 My father was a drug addict and had serious psychological issues as well. My parents divorced after some serious violence had taken place while I was still pretty young. The last time I saw him was at his funeral (he died of a drug overdose, alone) while I was pregnant with my first child. I wonder if the overwhelming sadness and fear I’m experiencing stems from all of that………..
Thanks for having the courage to share….
Penny
Thank you for your message. I am dealing with past issues right now. It has been hard, but I can truly say I feel God present in my life for the first time. The book helps me believe more and more daily that he does have a plan for me.
Wow this is a powerful nugget! Thank you for posting this I’ve been following in twitter. Things have just seemed to be overwhelming lately with finances and I know this may sound silly but praying for a future husband. In my head I had this idea before 25 I want to be married. Well with graduating college soon I’ve def have been leaving it all in Gods hands. Being away from home now for the last two years of college was a hard move. Making new friends and finding a home church I see all god has done and continuing to do for me. But like you said its a healing process and I feel like the devil tries to brig up hurts in the past to kill my joy. I have hurts that only God knows about. Is that healthy? The thoughts creep up of the past and I sometimes feel like I’ll never find someone because I struggle to trust people and by people I mean guys. I’m continuing to pray for his will and vision in the ministry I’m in now helping young girls and college students in my generation!! I feel like im still in the healing process and realize that as soon as this is over God will bless me with an aweosme husband! I think ive come a long way in my walk with God and yes I have been at a point where disappointment seems to creep in and I ask the why?? Just being in a financial struggle really hurts more than I thought. Im believing in such a breakthrough! I think I’ve viewed God small enoough! I’m praying big. I don’t want to be self ambitious but he know my heart! I know there is a purpose for my pain and making me a strong girl right now. I thank God for my family and friends for what I do have! Thanks for the encouragement!!
Oh Renee, How you have blessed me.. i really needed to hear this tonite. I wonder so much what is His plan for me and for my family. So many crushing hurts from other Christians. This has been such an encouragement.. Thank you and know you and you sweet family are always in my prayers!!
I recieved your book “A Confident Heart” today. I’ve read thru to Chapter 4. Reading the posts I wondered if I would throw the book. No, I didn’t. I ‘m thrilled, happy, that God has a plan for me. Looking forward to finishing the book. I know God has been nudgeing me to come out of myself and share my story. We don’t have to be identified by our past. However, telling of our past can set another free to living God’s plan for them. Praise and all Glory belong to God!
You said you tried to create the happily ever after that you didn’t have in your family of origin. My parents were married until death separated them. My parents had that lifelong marriage, but there is great disappointment in my marriage and children. I wanted to create that perfect family, where the kids meet the high expectations of the parents and become positive role models. Enter my husband from a very different background. We were rarely on the same page, and often I allowed him to lead me astray from God. When we married I thought he was saved, although now I look back at the warning signs I chose to ignore. He did come to God during a particularly dark time in our marriage, but I’m still not sure he’s saved. I see how disrespectful he is to our son, who gives that same disrespect in return. I see poor choices being made. His poor choices have hurt our family. I feel my family is broken, although not because of divorce, because of disobedience, on everyones part. I was inconsistent of my expectations and modeling good behavior when my children were teenagers, the really tough years, because I often felt undermined by my husband and decided “if you can’t beat em, join em”. My children are adults now, and have made some choices leading to hard lessons and embarrassment. Because I failed, I have an enormous amount of disappointment in myself and my family. How do I forgive myself when God expected me to train them up in the way they should go? How do I look at them through God’s eyes and stop scolding them, yet hold up a higher standard? I still want that perfect family, but we are beyond that. I do need and want restoration though, and for my family to find a real relationship with God. But I need to get my thoughts right.
You have helped sooo many by sharing your story and teaching Gods Truth, my favorite part is that you may have saved marriages and families…….God is good. There is so very much hurt and sadness in this world..I lost my marriage to infidelity,husband left, and it breaks my heart everyday for me and my children(who are adults)just so hard all the broken dreams…financially devestating also..and loss to death (my brother and two of his beautiful children killed in a car accident last June 17th) sometimes just very hard to go on and you shared hope, Thank You.*not gonna lie,hoping I get the book to share w/my children.. also I have to somehow find peace w/all of this..so sorry for all the hardships for everyone…prayers go out..in Jesus name AMEN
Thank you Renee- I subscribe to “Encouragement for Today” Proverbs 31 Ministries- and was delighted to see that you were giving the women’s devotions today on: “If God Loves Me Why…” I especially loved this part:
“Can I whisper some hope into your heart today? If you are living and breathing, your purpose has not yet been fulfilled. No matter what you have done or what has been done to you, God does have a plan for your life.”
You have whispered to my heart the hope I need for the healing start… it has to start with me I know this… I need to be brave and face those deep hurts and learn to forgive… baby steps….for now but praying for Jesus to come live in my heart now – instead of the dark shadows of my past… I believe faith as small as a mustard seed… Miracles like something that small can grow into a strong Oak tree one day…until then… baby steps for me- I will get to where I need to be.
Aloha from Hawaii xoxoxoxox
Renee, this chapter is really heavy stuff to deal with. Do you think we should linger in chapter 4 for another week in order to give our hearts time to process some of it?
Chapter 4 was a hard read for me. At certain points I found myself holding back tears and wondering why I even had the urge to cry. It was then that I realized that on the surface I was “fine”, but the pain of past hurts is still like a fresh wound. Honestly, I don’t know if I want to come face to face with those who have hurt me and share my feelings with them and express forgiveness to them. Do I have to in order to have a confident heart? Can’t I just forgive them from a distance and press on? This is something I definitely have to pray about.
Four years ago this month, my 33 year old son was diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor after only a week of symptomatic headaches. The neurosurgeon told us he expected it may be the worst type of brain tumor. However, the surgeon asked me to go home and ask everyone I knew to pray. He explained that he had been in for the worst and had seen miracles. What a blessing. On the day of the surgery, my sister unexpectedly was given a Bible verse that came along with a receipt from a local pharmacy. It was Jeremiah 29:11-14. I held that little card in my hand throughout the surgery. Reading over and over. I claimed it as a promise for my son. He came through the surgery beautifully. It was NOT the most malignant tumor. It was malignant, but slow growing. The oncologist told us “our cup was half full” The treatment was grueling, but he managed to work. I kept the card with the verse in my wallet. One day when he was discouraged, I gave it to him. He carries it now. He has faith and courage and has had many challenges in this journey. But, he is now cancer free, off of chemo after 31/2 years. I still claim the promise of God to Jeremiah for us all. He has perfect plan no matter what. God does want us to prosper. The most remarkable part of these verses is the part that tells us, “when you pray, I will listen. And, when you look for me with all your heart, I can be found by you.” Really finding God is the greatest part of all.
Thank you again for the personable videos and your vulnerability. I can identify very much with you! This “Confident Heart” study and the support you give by your words, verses, and your testimony is very powerful!! Love, Giselle from Fellowship Church- Miami
Checking to see if my email address will be displayed in the comments bar. I prefer that it remains private.
I thought I had finished processing my childhood disappointments but now I realize that I had just buried them. Now I think I can face them head on with God’s help.
Praying for the walls to come down and God’s truth to find it’s way in.
Reading and watching the video has been enlightening for me. I do have past hurts from others and disappointments in myself that I have and continuing to learn to let go, to give it all to God. I can see daily how the past with hurts has effected my daughters out look on life and now how it has hindered my life also.With some of my past hurts I have been able to forgive, let go and have peace with it with the Lord and myself, but it took me a long time, of continual daily praying with asking for forgiveness before the situation when heard or thought about did not raise my blood pressure and cause anger. After being able to deal with this which was very close to home/family, I did find peace, even thought to this day, I do not know if with saying I was sorry for my part and asking for forgiveness from those that I hurt has been accepted. And even though my childhood does not bring back memories of sadness, I know that when finding out I had a sister, years and years later, it did bring up thoughts of finding my biological father and anger knowing that he left mom and I and has never once attempted to find out anything about me. It did leave a scar for my sister due to the situation. I do believe that her scars hindered us from having a sister to sister relationship at first even though I tried to reach out, but I find that now we are bonding to be closer and I give all the glory to God, for I continue to pray for us both in this matter. So now it is time to work on the timeline of the past and resolve those issues so that any hard feeling or resentment I have will leave my heart so that the Lord can fill those spaces with His love, hope and His word. I thank you for sharing your stories and this wonderful bible study and your ministry to women, for this touches my heart, for I can see where I need help with dealing with my past and my mistakes so that my heart can be filled with Gods love. God Bless
I downloaded a Confident Heart and read through it on Kindle . I read the first few chapters of the book at lightening speed….it was as if you were voicing all my past hurts and fears and insecurities. . I wish I would have read this book 20 years ago! I am now going back and working the exercises and re-reading the chapters. It truly has been a blessing and a healing in my life. I’ve known God from a very young age but until I’ve read your book couldn’t understand why I just didn’t feel good enough and thought I must be the only one out there that felt this way. One thing you wrote particularly touched me and it went something like this…”When we compare ourselves to others we are comparing our insides to their outsides” How true and no wonder we don’t ever feel we measure up!.The hardest part for me was allowing God to help me revist and heal those hurts, and not just bury them…and I’m still a work in progress!!!. Thank you for sharing your experiences and know that you are blessing others in your ministry!
Renee,
Chapter 4. It was hard for me as I was doing my timeline. Leading a bible study doesn’t make it any easier. But as a leader I have to be the first to be transparent. We first watched your video of “Don’t throw the book across the room” because some of us were feeling a little paralyzed with our feelings (not wanting to go deeper). Some of us have been doing “fine” not having to relive those areas in our lives. Thank you for your video of explaining further of the timeline. It really helped my group wanting to go deeper. You are a true blessing.
Thank you for sharing your message with us today. I truly believe this message was meant for me. My parents also divorced when I was very young (only nine years old) and my mom had to raise me and my sister ALONE. My father was hardly in our life and if it wasn’t for his mother I don’t think we would’ve had a relationship with him at all. Sometimes I think I look for my husband to give me the love I lack from having an absent father and when he doesn’t I get upset and feel like there is no true love in our marriage and I become resentful and want to let it all go.
My family has gone through some very difficult times (like never before) and it seems that once we get pass one struggle another one pops up. Just back in November my car was repossessed , then here at the end of April we had to move in with my sister and her family b/c we couldn’t make the payments on our rental home. And now it has been hard for us to find a decent-safe home b/c of credit issues. Just in the past few weeks my husband and I haven’t spoken and contemplating divorce. Sometimes, like now think it’s best b/c of all the past hurts. I pray daily for us to find a place to live and for answers on what to do about my marriage b/c I don’t want us to end in divorce but at the same time I no longer want to have to pry love from my husband when it should be given genuinely. This has been a very depressing time for me and I’m just at a lost. We still have our two youngest teenage daughters that we’re responsible for. Right now, I feel like I have failed as a mother & wife and can’t figure out how to get back on the right path. I’ve been praying continously and I know everything is done in God’s time and I trust God’s timing. I also know that all this will come to past and there will be happier days again in our life’s but it’s difficult going through it now and having my girls having to suffer too.
Thanks for the prayers for my family…we shall smile again!
Tara,
my heart goes out to you. I will pray for you.