“But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light” 1 Peter 2:9 (NIV)
Christmas was only days away and we still didn’t have a tree. Living on a college-student’s budget with our first baby on the way, we were scraping by and couldn’t bring ourselves to spend $25-50 on something we didn’t need. It seemed kind of trivial when I told God how sad I felt that we couldn’t afford a Christmas tree. Then I felt guilty knowing there were others who needed so much more.
On our way home from a friend’s house the Sunday night before Christmas, my husband, J.J. and I noticed the tree lot near our apartment had marked all their trees down to $10! Grins stretched across our faces as we made plans to buy one Monday night as soon as J.J. got home from his part-time job.
The next evening we walked down each row of the tree lot looking for just the right spruce to fit in the corner of our one-bedroom apartment. Feeling sentimental and slightly maternal, I realized that picking our first Christmas tree was going to be almost as difficult as choosing our child’s name.
I took way too much time. The sun went down quickly, the tree-lot started to close and the spotlights shut down. There we were, standing in the pitch dark without a tree.
My creative and very patient husband pulled his car into the rows of trees and flashed on his high beams. Suddenly, the bright lights dispelled the darkness and standing in front of me was the most precious tree I’d ever seen. Although it had some droopy branches and a gap on one side, I pointed at it and told J.J., “That’s the one I want!”
Later that night, with my hands wrapped around a cup of hot cocoa, I sat on our couch looking at our little tree. I remembered how sad I felt earlier when the darkness made it impossible to see the trees. Yet, when the beams of light illuminated the lot, my heart filled with hope.
Etched in my mind was a picture I wouldn’t forget, a memory that drew me back to another time marked by darkness – a time when I wasn’t choosing, but needed to be chosen.
Just when it felt like all my dreams had died and my hope was gone, the Light of God’s unfailing love punctured the clouds of darkness and depression surrounding my mind. It happened on another cold winter’s eve in January 1989 while I was sitting in the balcony of a church hoping to hear something that would fill the empty places in my heart. Feeling His Spirit tugging on my heart, whispering words I longed to hear, I sensed God saying, “Renee, you are the one I want.”
He’d been trying to tell me for years, but I had allowed the wounds of my past and the words of others to convince me that no one would ever want me.
At some point, I think most of us have felt like the little Christmas tree and me. Scarred by disappointments, we wonder if anyone would ever choose us. With gaps that make us feel like candidates for rejection, we hope no one will notice our inadequacies. And like the fate of my spruce pine, it seems the only way we’ll get chosen is if all the good ones are picked first.
First Peter 2:9 reminds us that through Christ we are chosen! God sent His Son to light our darkness and fill the gaps in our hearts. Sweet friend, I pray that you will hold onto the truth that God sees you today, and He wants you to hear Him declaring with all His heart, “You are the one I want!”
Dear Lord, that spruce pine and I have a lot in common. Even with my gaps and broken branches, You chose me and made me part of Your family through Jesus. Thank You for sending Your Son to bring Light in the dark corners of my life and to bring endless hope to my heart. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
Today, I’m also sharing this post on Karen Ehman’s blog as part of her 12-days of Christmas giveaways, and giving away a special gift pack that includes:
- A signed copy of my book, A Confident Heart
- A “Living in the Security of God’s Promises” – printable
- A Bath & Body Words Christmas treat
- A Starbucks gift card
To enter once, click “Share Your Thoughts” below. To enter twice, enter below and hop over to Karen’s blog to enter again.
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Thank you for sharing. In that stressful place right now, this is so timely! Would love to have your book!
Thank you for reminding me that I am chosen by God.
Thank you for this post today! I the world we live in today, it`s too easy to forget that God loves us no matter what. Even if we have a few gaps in our ” branches” we are always prescious in His sight.
I so needed to read this today!! My life is so stressfull I can hardly see straight. I am losing my health insurance and probably my job. My feelings are still hurt from comments my husband made last night. There are family issues beyond my control. I find myself wondering where God is in all of this and then your post reminds me that He chose me, I am His!!! I need to look away from the stress and look at Jesus because He’s right there!
Thanks and Merry Christmas Renee!!!
Thank you Renee and God Bless You.
Thank you for this post. I feel a gap, things in my life are not going the way I “want” I need to remember it is Gods plan I need to look for and wait in his arms. I can feel him on monment and gone the next. I always remember you saying put your name in the scripture and make it personal. That does help me so much. thanks, Have a Blessed Holiday
LOVE this post, thank you for sharing. I have so been feeling inadequate these days, and have been missing the real reason for the season, trying to get back to being real during Christmas!!
🙂
May God bless you for sharing and ministering to us.
thank you for always letting us in on your personal life!
Such a beautiful breath of hope. In a world filled with “comparrisons” and peer pressures, we so desperately need this message. Women (young and old) need to hear and believe this hope…God chose me. He loves us enough to shine His light on us and give us a role in His incredible plan. Thank you,Renee. Your messages never fail to be exactly what I need for the day. I am so very thankful to call you a “sister in Christ”.
~Danita
Great post – such a good reminder when we get so busy with all the external things of Christmas!
Your post gave me encouragement. No money for gifts this year. Praying God would provide for this. If not, then I will praise Him who knows better than myself His will for me. Blessings
Thank you for the reminder. I am a new creation, I am chosen, I am loved!
Enjoyed reading your story – very enlightening!!!! Merry Christmas!
I understand where you are coming from in your devotion today. I accepted Christ as my Savior when i was in Junior High but walked away from him after high school. I was in a very bad place when God sent my husband to rescue me from drugs and alcohol. Our faith has deepened over the last ten years. We have studied the Bible and gotten to know Christ in a whole new way.
Renee: Thank you so much for this timely message. I love your hear and am always enlightened by your insights. Chosen is a marvelous word to describe the depth of the Father’s love for us and the lengths to which He went to show His love for us. If we keep this in mind as we go through our days, even the greatest challenges can seem easier. Thank you for brightening our days.
Thanks.
Thank you so much for sharing this. Merry Christmas!
Renee,
I know all too well how it feels to be surrounded by the clouds of darkness and despair. However, to know that God loves me, in spite of all of my imperfections, brings about feelings of hope and love. God’s love is so awesome and precious. One year ago tomorrow, God showed me that He has chosen me when He allowed my 1 year old daughter at the time and myself to walk away from a car accident that left my SUV totaled after flipping on the highway 5 times. I know God to be faithful, I’ve tried Him and I know above all the promises He fulfills everyday. Thank you Renee for being a vessel that is being used by God to uplift and encourage God’s children. I love your book and can’t wait to pass it one of my friends. It has been a true blessing in my life.
Tia
Renee:
Thanks so much for sharing. I am that little sad Christmas tree too. But in God’s eyes I am perfect! Thank goodness for what He believes I am. I wish I could remember it every minute of every day! You are always so encouraging and speak words to how I feel. I would love to meet you as I am sure we would be immediate friends. Your ministry is making a BIG difference in my life!
Tobi