“But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light” 1 Peter 2:9 (NIV)
Christmas was only days away and we still didn’t have a tree. Living on a college-student’s budget with our first baby on the way, we were scraping by and couldn’t bring ourselves to spend $25-50 on something we didn’t need. It seemed kind of trivial when I told God how sad I felt that we couldn’t afford a Christmas tree. Then I felt guilty knowing there were others who needed so much more.
On our way home from a friend’s house the Sunday night before Christmas, my husband, J.J. and I noticed the tree lot near our apartment had marked all their trees down to $10! Grins stretched across our faces as we made plans to buy one Monday night as soon as J.J. got home from his part-time job.
The next evening we walked down each row of the tree lot looking for just the right spruce to fit in the corner of our one-bedroom apartment. Feeling sentimental and slightly maternal, I realized that picking our first Christmas tree was going to be almost as difficult as choosing our child’s name.
I took way too much time. The sun went down quickly, the tree-lot started to close and the spotlights shut down. There we were, standing in the pitch dark without a tree.
My creative and very patient husband pulled his car into the rows of trees and flashed on his high beams. Suddenly, the bright lights dispelled the darkness and standing in front of me was the most precious tree I’d ever seen. Although it had some droopy branches and a gap on one side, I pointed at it and told J.J., “That’s the one I want!”
Later that night, with my hands wrapped around a cup of hot cocoa, I sat on our couch looking at our little tree. I remembered how sad I felt earlier when the darkness made it impossible to see the trees. Yet, when the beams of light illuminated the lot, my heart filled with hope.
Etched in my mind was a picture I wouldn’t forget, a memory that drew me back to another time marked by darkness – a time when I wasn’t choosing, but needed to be chosen.
Just when it felt like all my dreams had died and my hope was gone, the Light of God’s unfailing love punctured the clouds of darkness and depression surrounding my mind. It happened on another cold winter’s eve in January 1989 while I was sitting in the balcony of a church hoping to hear something that would fill the empty places in my heart. Feeling His Spirit tugging on my heart, whispering words I longed to hear, I sensed God saying, “Renee, you are the one I want.”
He’d been trying to tell me for years, but I had allowed the wounds of my past and the words of others to convince me that no one would ever want me.
At some point, I think most of us have felt like the little Christmas tree and me. Scarred by disappointments, we wonder if anyone would ever choose us. With gaps that make us feel like candidates for rejection, we hope no one will notice our inadequacies. And like the fate of my spruce pine, it seems the only way we’ll get chosen is if all the good ones are picked first.
First Peter 2:9 reminds us that through Christ we are chosen! God sent His Son to light our darkness and fill the gaps in our hearts. Sweet friend, I pray that you will hold onto the truth that God sees you today, and He wants you to hear Him declaring with all His heart, “You are the one I want!”
Dear Lord, that spruce pine and I have a lot in common. Even with my gaps and broken branches, You chose me and made me part of Your family through Jesus. Thank You for sending Your Son to bring Light in the dark corners of my life and to bring endless hope to my heart. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
Today, I’m also sharing this post on Karen Ehman’s blog as part of her 12-days of Christmas giveaways, and giving away a special gift pack that includes:
- A signed copy of my book, A Confident Heart
- A “Living in the Security of God’s Promises” – printable
- A Bath & Body Words Christmas treat
- A Starbucks gift card
To enter once, click “Share Your Thoughts” below. To enter twice, enter below and hop over to Karen’s blog to enter again.
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Renee,
Thank you so much for sharing. So often that’s the way I feel. I feel like there is no one out there who lvoes me, not even God. I don’t know how he can love me if no one else does, but your blog really helped me this morning. Sometimes I feel so distant from God, like I want to pray and read my Bible but i just can’t “find the time” so to speak. I have been asking God to set me on FIRE for Him and His Word but it just doesn’t seem to be happening.
What a great prize pack your offering!! & great story!
I have been out of work since April of this year and although I have applied for so many jobs, I too have felt “picked over” each time I wasn’t chosen for a position. I have tried my best to not let the rejection be so hurtful however with each new book I read such as yours or Lysa’s or Perry Noble’s and now Karen Ehman’s Let.It.Go; I am so much stronger in the Lord and I have grown to put my faith on my calling for Him. I know God will lead me to the job He wants for me. Have a wonderful Christmas. Nancy
God is so faithful! I love watching what he does all around me!! Merry Christmas to all!
I feel the same way. When I finally, really turned to God, my darkness was bad and my life shattered. Now I know if God could choose me, in the state I was in, He must really love me. Thanks for all your encouraging words.
Thanks Renee you are truly a blessing. It’s good to be reminded that God loves us inspite of our flaws. He chosen us and there is nothing we need to do. There is no works great enough for God to choose us since he already has out of his love and through this salvation. It gives me a sense of peace and hope knowing God will meet our needs we are on his mind and heart. I really enjoyed seeing you at the conference her in Raleigh. I really wanted to win your gift pack you had such inspiring words. I have been throwing away paper for any thought that does not line up with God’s. Hope to read your book soon. Blessing to you and your family. I hope your son foot is much better.
Thank you for this thoughtful, powerful message today. I am reading A Confident Heart and have intentions of buying that book for several friends. I too feel like that small, insignificant tree that no one wants. Thank you for reminding me God never throws us away or gives up on us. We, on the other hand, tend to give up too quickly when things don’t work out when or how we think they should. I’m praying that I will just trust and let God take care of the big picture. Thank you Renee. I’m so grateful you heard God ,but I’m even more grateful you listened and believed. Be so blessed today.
Thank you for a great reminder at a difficult time of the year.
Thank you for reminding all of us that we are chosen and so special to God. I hope I can be such a blessing to someone this Christmas season that they will see just how special they are too!
This is just the message I needed to hear today!! Just as you explained how you felt in the balcony of that church needing to hear God loved you and chose you, that is where I find myself. I have gone through so many hurts and trials, including the death of my husband while we were separated, that I don’t know who I am anymore. I don’t know my purpose or what I am supposed to do now. I struggle with knowing if someone could ever really love me because I didn’t get married until I was 33 and had already had two daughters outside of medlock. My life has been one giant struggle and I know God has been there to love me and see me through holding me through all of it but I just have such a hard time knowing what is next.
This message was just the message I needed to read & I’m sure many others would be blessed by this too! I have for many years struggled with rejection, self-loathing, and trying different things to fill this void; when knowing deep in my spirit that only coming to God with my broken life, would fulfill! Your wonderful, God-inspired messages Renee, have helped me to hope in God again and give me a new perspective on things that I’ve been going through; that I didn’t see before! This particular message says to me: God can make the broken beautiful! This happens when we give God our lives and take our hands off!! I’ve started to realise this in the last 15 months!! Can I encourage any other person who may read these lovely messages Renee and friends post; please take time to read them and open your heart to Jesus! Believe me, you won’t regret doing so!!
Jo McInnes
Thank you so much for the reminder of how dear we are to God! I always felt I was chosen by default for everything in my life and settled for second best. After my divorce several years ago I jumped head first into my church and have not looked back. God has brought me to places I never dreamed I would be. I have lead 2 small groups of “A confident Heart” and watched womens lives change before my eyes, including mine. I most recently finished a small group on “Unglued”. Proverbs 31 has blessed mine and countless other womens lives beyond belief. I no longer live in the “shadow”. Blessings to all!
Thank you for sharing what God has taught you. I have heard God speaking to me so often through your words. Thank you for this blessing.
So thankful for this msg. It reminds me that I need to rest in the Lord.
What a beautiful reminder that we indeed are chosen to be “bought”and brought into our Fathers everlasting family……..your devotion reminded me of how often I expect perfection and that God is just so accepting of us just the way we are and showers us with His love and grace.
Thank you for reminding me of how precious we all are to Him xoxox
Thank you for an inspiring message!
I still have in my mind that lovely image of the light shining on that tree, my husband would write a whole story about that poor tree being constantly passed by because it wasn’t quite perfect, a little quirky, and then the light shines on it and he is chosen 🙂
Thanks for sharing. I’m in the midst of trying to overcome some sense of rejection from people closest to me.
I really needed to hear this right now. I’ve been feeling dejected & rejected and this really spoke to my heart. Thank you for your words!
Thanks for your reminder that God CHOSE me. I often forget that I am a daughter of the King, beloved to Him. Powerful words today…. Words to ponder…. Thank you…