It started with a cough. A few sneezes. Then a horrible headache. For days, I denied it was anything serious. Tried to convince myself I was not really sick.
Pushing through the coughing, wheezing, sinus pain and aches, I resisted slowing down.
Who else would do it all if I couldn’t?
There were deadlines and expectations to meet, laundry to do, and emails to return. We needed groceries and meals for our family of five.
A few nights of not sleeping {and a couple of hours in Urgent Care on Saturday}, my self-determination caved in. I had a respiratory virus that was being exacerbated by allergies and asthma.
In this unexpected, unwanted, “forced-slowing-down” God’s made it clear –
I have issues: unrealistic and unhealthy expectations of myself.
My heart towards me doesn’t represent His heart for me.
I have these knowing moments.
But then I fall back into pushing myself. I don’t recognize the imbalance until I’m down for the count. I have more than a respiratory virus. I have a soul virus He wants to heal.
Why is this so hard?
I don’t have the answers, but I’m asking the questions. Bending my will, asking Jesus to be my comfort. My expectation. My measure. My drive. To be my God… so I can just be me: tired, behind on my deadlines, needy me.
And this song is playing on repeat. God’s speaking. Thank you Laura Story for capturing my soul-struggle with words and melodies that melt me into His arms of Grace. I hope you’ll take just a minute to listen {and then enter below to win a copy of Laura’s new CD}. You will be so glad you did!
How does today’s post or Laura’s song speak to your heart today?
Is there some way you need to let go of your expectations of yourself or a situation and ask God to be God so you can “just be you”?
“Share your thoughts” below for a chance to win one of Laura Story’s new albums on CD.
I’ll pick three winners to each receive a CDs and a copy of my NEW Confident Heart Devotional book
Laura’s newest full studio album is officially available on iTunes. Laura is currently on tour with Steven Curtis Chapman and the Glorious Unfolding Tour. And she’s coming to Charlotte December 6th for a Girls Night Out we’re doing together with 91.9FM. More details coming soon!
Want to join me and Melissa Taylor TONIGHT on the Real Life: Confident Heart Connection Calls ? We’ll be talking with Laura about her life, her faith, the story behind “So I Can Just Be Me” and other songs on her new Album “The God of Every Story”? Find out more and sign up here!
WOW….cant wait for the connection call…This is how I was feeling today. I am overwhelmed in all aspects of my life. I have been talking to God all day long..then I ran across a post and found Psalm 61: 1-2 Hear my cry, O God; listen to my prayer. From the ends of the earth I call to you, I call as my heart grows faint; lead me to the rock that is higher than I. After I read that God placed me on the rock and calmed my frustrated heart.
My husband and I are planning on going on a mission trip next summer. To make extra money for the trip I have been making scarves and hair bands to sell. Well, today I tried offering these hair bands to some of the women who bring their children to childcare where I work. As I was speaking I felt very fearful. The enemy has been putting doubt in my heart so much that we are not able to raise enough to go and do orphan care in Ukraine. I felt unworthy and fearful all day long.
When I got home and got an email from you…I began to read it and I feel like the Lord himself spoke to me and encouraged me so much. He healed me from the thoughts of doubt and fear, He reminded me that He is my everything and I just need to slow down…rest in Him and stop trying to make money for the trip with my own efforts but trust in his provision and everlasting care. I can be me because God is always God and he never changes. My spirit rejoices because of such a timely encouragement through you.
God bless you.
The lyrics of this song was as if I was writing a note to self. I am a wife, mother,daughter, employee and student. There are often times I feel as the song stated a “failure”. The various roles that I have are for individuals I truly love and want to be there helping them in anyway that I can. But as a result I find my thoughts are in chaos and I feel like a hamster that is running in the wheel. It’s at those moments that I know that I need to slow down and feast on the words of God to find peace and restoration. In His presence I can just be me. Thank you
It is good to know we can just be ourselves and God will be everything else. He loves us just the way we are.
This song is so beautiful! Thank you for the reminder. We have so much going on, packing, trying to close on our house. Waiting and waiting for others to complete their part so we can move forward and I keep thinking what more can I do to get this done on time. With the holiday coming up and wanting to have my family over for Thanksgiving at our place for the first time in years, I’ve been putting pressure on myself to keep doing and need to let God work out the details. He knows what we need to complete this process and he’s never late!
Let Him.
Wow, This song also hit home with me. I’m a 45 yr old mom that has always “fixed” everything for everyone. But yet had the lowest self esteem of most I knew. Now I understand that i was grasping onto anything that would accepted me, but I lost “ME” in the process. Beginng to believe I only existed to help others become their destiny. Since coming back home to Our Holy Father, I am learning to live one day at a time, and allowing myself to become who God has called me to be. This song is a reminder to sit at Jesus’ feet and relax in His Presence while He is molding me to
become the daughter He has always loved.
Thank you for your post today, it hit right to my heart. Love u all
This song was/is something I needed to hear. I have very high expectations of myself. I think that sometimes I expect perfection of myself and I end up feeling like a failure because,obviously, I cannot meet that expectation of being perfect. (duh!)
I need to just let go and let God guide me. He is everything I need. God will not disappoint.
My situation is the opposite of Renee’s as I can never seem to really do a lot of productive stuff and prefer being at home. I get so down on my self and feel worthless and a waste of life. I have struggled with this for some years. I have experienced peoples comments that enforce my negativity about myself. I am trying to work on this and am thankful that people are sharing their hearts and lives through this and many other online studies I am getting to experience . Thank you Renee for sharing and all you other ladies too. God bless . Liz
I know many of us can relate to this post! God often reminds me to sit & Be Still in His Presence but oh how hard it is! Love this song.
Was just talking to my counselor today about stop, and let others do some of the things I have been doing for them. Learning to understand that most of these people are grown ups and can do for themselves. I am learning to say “NO”. Maybe that is why I am so tired. Getting back to reading “Encouragement for Today.” Thank you for all you do to inspire all. Melody
Renee, I think you took words directly from my mouth. I constantly fight a need to control every little tiny atom in my life….and fail miserably! This song brought tears to my eyes – I think I’ll be putting it on repeat until it touches my soul. Thank you so much for sharing your story, your faith and this song.
I LOVE this song! Just saw her in concert with SCC in Columbia. They were fabulous. Such great stories, tender hearts & exude the glory of God.
I have struggled for a while with self doubt and feeling like what I have to offer and share is reciprocated and appreciated. I am working to open my heart to God on a more regular basis and see all of the love that he has for me. At this point in my life I really need “God to be God, so I can just be me”. I need to be healed, I need to find peace, I need to be happy with myself, and need to learn to enjoy being alone and spending time only with God. Thank you for this wonderful Bible study and your positive strength and support for all of this.
Been struggling with this and asking myself lately, “Why am I doing this? This isn’t fun anymore. Work isn’t fun, home isn’t fun.” Why am I pushing myself so hard and trying to please everyone but missing the heart of God? Don’t have the answers yet, but working on it.
Yeppers, this is my theme song too. It is what I needed and just at the right time. Thank you.
Renee…thru this study I have struggled too, but I thank God I’ve gotten this far!! I LOVE this song, it just makes me breathe a sigh of relief!! God’s in control, he’s my healer & I can just let him Love Me!! Thru this Wonderful Study, I am moving forward more than I ever have & I have experienced more PEACE in my Life!!
I love this song! “Be my healer, be my comfort, be my peace” is exactly what I’m praying for most often these days. I’m reminded today that He does want to be all of those things and I don’t always have to be strong and have it all together. It’s okay to not be able to do it all or to fall apart sometimes. He loves me just the way I am. I need to stop trying to be perfect because He knows who I was created to be and by His grace I’ll get there.
Renee,
I sit here in tears as I write this. I wish I could let God be God and me be me.
You see I have totally spoiled my adult child, who is now in his 30’s.
He lives with us and has totally ruined his work record.
I keep handing him over to God & then picking him back up.
I would love to just let go and leave it be.
My biggest expectation of me is in trying to fix my adult son.
Reading the post caught me. You see it was just about 2 years ago when I first heard “Blessings” and it became a song that I played over & over non-stop. It became the song that for very different reasons kept me functioning in auto-piolet. It was the focus of my days in which the world was telling me to abandon my faith & my marriage and I would find a path of healing and a future. And I ingored them, pushed along almost band-aided together by that song. And now it reminds me of the future and hope I have in God, which I need to remember 2 slow down to feel. And yet it was a song that has reached out and held onto me and my daughter while I couldn’t see beyond the pain of domestic violence and the ending of my marriage. I realize this might not be most peoples thinking on the question asked, but it is where my heart lead me when I read the question. And the understanding now that if we don’t slow down we will face the grief of lost time in addition to other things.
Really enjoy Laura’s music – thanks for sharing! I totally relate with your post today – I have the biggest expectations for myself and don’t allow myself sometimes to lower them – esp at the holidays. Thaks for the reality check – and for being real and pointing me towards my Heavenly Father!
Love this song! So thankful for your writing, beautiful songs like this, the with of Proverbs 31 and everyone involved. It is such a comfort to meet and hear from other women who have the same struggles. Praise God that we don’t have to be perfect because of His grace! We must remember that He will always be there to catch us…and our tears…when we fall! And we will…we just have to remember not to be so hard on ourselves sometimes!
Praying that you will start to feel better and the Lord will heal you! Being sick is so hard it just drains everything from you. Blessings to you, Renee! Thank you for posting this song! Just the name makes my heart full of peace! 🙂
This is an incredible song….It is my heart….I have been trying so hard…but that isn’t what God wants…He wants me to let HIM….and me to rest in Him…I have searched for years….who Am I …what is my purpose…God told me…Let me show you. Stop looking/trying so hard..
.I was recently asked to be an elder for my church..I told my Pastor ” I am not (the former Elder)”. He said….:Just be You….that is what we want:. OH MY! those words thrilled my heart…because I never felt I was of value to anyone…but God is using me….Wow…
My prayer each day for me and my family is “God help me become the woman of God you created me to be.”. I am able to do this because of P31 OBS….Thank you Renee for your book. It is helping me each day…
I do want to be ME and God to be my God, my everything. Shattered and scattered, that is so my life sometimes. Sunday I was trying so hard to do everything (Pastor’s wife, Sunday School teacher, hostess to potluck, worship leader) and finally it hit me – I can’t do everything – it wears me out. I have to be me and I have to let God show me what is important to Him and everything else will take care of itself according to His time and His will. Thank you so much for sharing your devotion and this song.
So simple, yet so unbelievably difficult! I very often put so many unreal expectations on myself, when it comes to being a mother, a wife, and a servant for those in my church family. I also struggle with trying to be who others “think” I should be, but I need to remember to just be me and let God be God! Thank you for this post and for sharing that beautiful song!
I too have been ill for several weeks.
I don’t know how I can Just Be Me?
I’ve always had to pull it together for everyone else.
I am at work before 7:00 a.m. And when the day is done.
I come home and prepare dinner for my grandchildren, their mom (who lives with me) and sometimes my friend.
Make sure things are in order. By the time I try to take a seat, the family is here, and then it’s on!
I don’t have a hobby, I don’t visit family or friends, I listen to the tons of messages from Bill Collectors, looking for finances that I don’t have to spare. I know that God has my back through all the turmoil. So, How do I Just Be Me?
I haven’t had a weekend to myself in years. The days I am not working, I am trying to keep my home presentable for my family.
I’ve recently reconnected with my Church that I grew up in as a child. The Sunday service and fellowship offer some relief. I listen to the Gospel Radio station in my city on my ride to and from work. It gives me food and consolation, to prepare for the day ahead.
I am 60 years old, soon to retire after 40 years with our School District.
So if you have some relief or suggestions to How I can Just Be Me.
I am your student
These songs are great. It’s so refreshing to feel that I am acceptable just as I am. It’s liberating. I really like “Blessings”.
Oh my goodness I can so relate. I think most women have these feelings that we have to keep “everything” together! I feel like I’ve let down my kids, grand daughter, husband and friends because I can not do it ALL any more. I was diagnosed with Lupus 3 years ago and it definitely got my attention. There are good days I do more and some days all I can do is cry out to Jesus!!! He is teaching me a lot needless to say; grace, humility, patience, and much more. I’ve adjusted to a new normal but those doubts creep in every now and then and I’m so glad I can run to Jesus and I really can, Just Be Me!!
Thanks for all you do, what an encourager you are.
what an amazing song…and lyrics…thanks for sharing, renee…
Thank you for the amazing message today. I pray that you fell better soon Renee. This song really stands out to me and I am so grateful for the message of the song. When Satan is trying to destroy my confidence and t try to pull me away from God I am blessed to have this song.
As a child I was born with Cerebral palsy. Going to school I struggled drastically. From childhood on the continued to hear Messages like you’re not good enough, you’ll never make it, why do you even try. Left me feeling like no matter how hard I tried it was never good enough, the matter what I did it wasn’t good enough, and somebody could always do it better.
I need God. I can not hold it all together with out my loving father guiding me directing me, giving me peace and being my God my father so i can move forward being how God wants me to be and not focus on the hurtful world to decide who I am. This song speaks loud and reminds me I can just be me, the way are loving father wants me to be. I am not broken and I no longer want the negative messages of the broken world to decide who I am going to be.
Saying your failing the class is much different than being labeled as a failure. Understanding this brought tears to my eyes. they both are painful but have a different message. I love the reminder message at the last paragraph on page 132.
Now as we #Movefroward I now that #IAmNot a failure. If God provides and you have grown through transition you are not a failure you are and over-comer. Did you fail at Something today yes, you are not a failure by God. I your father I am giving you room to grow.
Somehow I’m not able to listen, because I’m from Canada?? Oh well. Thank you for your devotional AGAIN, for being so open with us, women who think we can do it all! I’m in that ‘group’. He calls us to rest in Him, but I rest in my accomplishments FAR TOO OFTEN.
Oh what a comfort this is to hear my feelings put to words and music and to know that I can put it all in my God’s hands.
This speaks to me on so many different levels. I am a single mom of two kids, work full-time outside of the home and have MANY challenging medical issues that all demand my attention. Being type A and driven toward perfection, I try to be what everyone wants and needs me to be. Trying to be supermom, super employee while just trying to get out of bed most days is exhausting. I have very high expectations for myself as a single mom. However, I have learned that when God gives me a flare up (another surgery, medical testing, etc), it means I have been pushing to hard. Thank you for this beautiful song reminding me to turn to God when I am feeling overwhelmed or hurting so that he can take the helm so that I can sit back and breath.
Oh Renee… exactly! This song speaks into that impossibly high standard I set for myself – trying, sometimes almost running myself ragged and sick, to be someone that I’m not meant to be. But for grace. I love that we are called to be still and allow God’s ability to right our inability. This book has been a beautiful reminder about God’s deep love for me. I am grateful.
I can so relate. I’m a single mom so I do push myself and try to do it all because if I don’t, then it won’t get done. I can often times find myself exhausted mentally and physically. I also do not accept help very well and definitely need to work on not comparing myself to others and being OK with not being perfect. BTW…I love Laura Story!!
Oh Renee… I’m right there with you, soul sister…sick as sick can be, and much like you, its probably my own sense of “needing” to DO it all and BE it all that lead to this very season. At the very least, its lead me to not being able to fight it off as fast as I would have usually. Worn down and worn out. All because I havent let God be God and let me be me… Your post and THIS song could NOT have come at a better time than now!!! I love how God does this…always brings me exactly the WORD or message I need at exactly the perfect time!! In addition to just my *physicial* sickness though, I’ve been truly struggling with worry about things going on in my extended family…things way out of my control, and things that I’ve been sensing in my heart God wants me to just leave in His hands, but I’ve been, instead, picking back up over and over and over again. Its so hard not to worry or hurt over things, and not to want to fix things. Its hard to trust God sometimes, not because I don’t WANT to trust Him, but because the timing seems so much more urgent to this imperfect human in me. My honest cries ARE … YES, God please take this, so I can just be me!!! And don’t let me keep picking these burdens back up…let me leave them safely in your arms! Thank you for your ministry, Renee and your prayers!! Praying for complete, quick healing for you AND that none of your other sweet family members catch your sickness either 😉 God bless you!!
So happy to learn to be ME. I have always hid in someone else’s shadow because I was AFRAID to be ME……..someone’s daughter, someone’s friend, someone’s mother, someone’s wife, etc. It is hard to step out of the shadow and be ME. Thank you to “A Confident Heart” for giving me the courage and a place to practice being who God made ME! Each day is a day of learning. The encouragement I receive from this Bible Study daily has/is changing my life!
I have had this song cycling since I first heard it a week ago. I also have trouble just “being”. I feel if I am not “doing” I am being lazy and my value diminishes. I know these are lies but is my mindset none the less
Oh how this song became one of my favorite songs the first time I heard it. It touched my heart so much that our band at church learned to play it so I could sing it at church. You see, I has first heard this song when things between my mom and I became really bad. I cried every time I heard the song because I was so hurt by what my mom was doing, but knew deep down I needed God to be my God, so I could just be me…..the person He had already forgiven for my sins that were being thrown in my face. Thank you Laura Story for writing a song that will always touch my life.
Ahhhh, FREEDOM…to be ME! Praise God!
One more thought. The Lord gave this to me this morning when my 4 month old daughter woke up for a bottle at 6 this morning. “Who am I in the Lord is Who I am in this world.” God is so amazing to me and all His children. He adopted us because He loved us so much. I hope this helps anyone in need of that special reminder!
Wow… this is so me!!! My life is too busy and I have a hard time letting go of anything because no one else can do it (or so I think so). After caring for my ailing father, working full time, doing the bookkeeping for my husband’s business…. I am exhausted and weary. I am tired but yet I have a hard time letting go! Why is it so hard to slow down and just let God….??? Thanks for encouraging me to let go and let God! I am going to download this on my Ipad tonight!
Wow! I couldn’t have read this at a more important time. I recently had to quit a job that was keeping me from being me, God’s devoted servant, wife, and mother to two beautiful children. I wasn’t able to do anything. Finally, after thought and prayer, I knew I made the right decision. I was tired and tired because I had gotten sick twice in one month with pneumonia and a bad upper respiratory infection. I know the Lord will bless me with a new and better fitting job. I have faith and I will be still for I know he has a plan and it will pan out when he is ready for it to. I’m too blessed to stay stressed! Onward and upward 🙂
It is hard when you feel so many people are watching you to see how you will handle certain things. What it really comes down to is only God’s opinion of you really counts. I am recovering from a 4 wheeler accident. I will need rotator cuff surgery soon and dealing with bad concussion symptoms. My Jesus is my strength through all of this. I love Him so. And, I need Him more every day! Thank you Jesus for being by my side always
Renee: your statement in Ch 7 pg 130 that failure can help us become the confident woman God created us to be…stronger &better–if we go to God for help. That should be our 1st step, and learning that can be a painful process. Thank you so much for “A Confident Heart.”
I’m so much meaner to myself than God would ever be. I expect a lot
In Chap. 5, . “How many times today did you wonder if you were measuring up to someone’s expectations of you?”
I started listing stuff and man, I am under a lot of pressure, to be good, to be kind, to not offend people by saying what I feel like saying somtimes, to look pretty, dress nice, don’t offend with my clothing choices, wear my hair in a nice way, look and smell clean and not messy, — and my loved ones don’t but the world expects me to be thin and beautiful, to have a nice house that is kept clean and organized at all times, work out, cook healthy food mostly but wildly inappropriate yumminess too, be creative, have a good job, do good at it, meet all those expectations no matter how high, be a great mother, wife, friend, daughter, lover, and to have balance. To nurture and teach the next generation, and the next. And I’m sure I left out a few. Most of those things give me joy.
But this week, they are laying in a pile of “I shoulds” they are just so much “I shoulds” like a pile of clean laundry that the dog rolled in and must be sorted washed and organized again.
I think of Mary, leaving the “shoulds” and going to sit at Jesus feet and listen to him. Not that she was abandoning her work, it was a heart matter. Not that Martha wasn’t serving- she was reprimanded for a heart matter, and for comparing. Mary chose her relationship with God. Sometimes I have to leave my stuff to work on my relationship with God, or to go be his hands and feet. (be there for someone who needs an ear). And I really need him to be my God, so I can just be.
I love this song and that is all I have ever wanted is to be ME. I am tired of being what I think everyone else wants me to be. Being me is the best way to be!!
Oh my goodness! I can’t believe this song! Having a daughter with special health care needs and medically fragile and having friends in the same situation I try to be everything to everybody..I need to just let go and let God! And remember to keep letting God be my God! Thank you so much I have found so much healing in this book and the obs! Thank you so much!
Wow, what a beautiful song and reminder that God is our strength, healer, helper, and everything we truly need. Why do we often think we can manage without Him? Thank you so much for sharing this song, your devotional, and thoughts today.
Praying that you feel better soon, Renee. Sharing your thoughts and this song have spoken to many women based on the comments above. Isn’t that just like God to use our weaknesses to make us and others stronger?