Satan is a bully who tries to make us feel small, inadequate, less than and insecure. You don’t have to believe him anymore.
This week, in chapter 7, we’re identifying and learning how to defeat our second most common doubt… “I’m such a failure.” It’s the wicked step-sister of “I’m not good enough.”
My prayer, hope and deepest desire is make sure failure no longer gets the final say in your life, JESUS does! Because YOU ARE are more than a conqueror through HIM (Jesus) who loves us, you can learn to fail forward and grow from your mistakes and full blown sins. That is how you become a women with a God-fident heart.
In today’s video teaching, I want to empower and equip you to stop letting doubt and discouragement beat you up and start letting God words build you up instead!
{If you are reading this via email, click here to return to my website to watch the video.}
{Download FREE Confident Heart “AM/FM Thoughts Printable here}
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Your Turn:
Click “share your thoughts” below and let’s talk about what GOd speaking is to your heart today through the video and/or chapter 7? What is one or two things you’ll take away today?
Last Week’s Giveaway Winners:
Michelle Raue – You are the winner from last Tuesday’s Roll-call and giveaway. You will receive a year’s subscription to the P31 Woman magazine and a $15 gift certificate to our Proverbs 31 Ministries Online Store. Also Abby, Jenni Mac and Phoenix you are the winners from last Wednesday’s Confident Heart giveaway. You will receive copy of my book, “A Confident Heart” along with my message, “Don’t Throw Away Your Confidence” on CD.
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I love your book “Confident Heart” and am learning many things in each chapter. I am wondering if you have a book or could suggest a resource for young men to read that would help them develop a confident heart.
Thank you for your response.
This chapter is hitting home with me for sure! I have always beaten myeslf down and believed the lies going through my head, even though I know the Word and grew up with it all around me. I never let it become a part of me. I can tell other people their worth and value in Christ, but never seem to get it myself. The AM / FM analogy is very helpful and is helping me readjust my focus in a more targeted way.
I also believe in the power of Christian music to realign your thoughts. I have my alarm set to “God’s Not Dead” so I am reminded of that every morning. And I changed my run music to all Christian and it made a world of difference in my attitude throughout the day. I am currently fasting TV (except Joyce Meyer while I walk on treadmill on my non-run days) and Facebook and Pinterest while I work on my focus and realigning my thoughts. All of this was starting in my before I started this chapter, so I know this is a confirmation that I am right on with where God is leading me.
Thank you Renee for this book, this study and your ministry.
Shawna
Just need to share, after receiving some difficult information in regards to my husbands job status and being on workman’s comp, all I could think about was what if? But as I continue to drive home, Renee came on the radio with her radio devotion which it home for me and Renee reminded me:Where are your eyes focused? the bible says: “My eyes are toward You, O GOD, in You I take refuge.”here are you eyes focused? That even in this difficult time of the unknown, to focus on my Master, the Lord. Thank you Renee for this reminder. God Bless
Renee-
Today, I didn’t come home from work- and hide from the world by crawling into bed and just sleeping the day away- I re-read chapter 7 and I answered my questions- OUCH! it hurt- but I got it and it felt good!
I also watched your video again-How to overcome the Bully of doubt, it helped me to soak in what I need to know.
This is what I’ll take away with me from chapter 7.
We have to accept that we are going to disappoint people, especially if we are seeking to please God. Sometimes we need to lower our expectations of ourselves and lighten our over loaded list of commitments. We also need to stop the habit of beating ourselves up with so much critcal thinking (AMEN TO THAT) What are we doing, talking to a child of God the way we talk to ourselves? When criticism comes and we have done our best, we can rest in knowing God is pleased if we didn’t do our best, we need to give ourselves grace and try again by failing foward. THANK YOU RENEE- today wasn’t as dark as yesterday- and I truly believe it was through your prayers and the other women in christ that truly cares and prays for all these women who leave comments on this site. It is so encourgaging and helpful.
Thank you so much!
Well put!
I really needed this today. I have panic attacks and anxiety issues, and have suffered from those for years. I have so many AM thoughts! It feels like my panic attacks are just one big, ugly avalanche of against me thoughts, and that I’m being buried by more than just self doubts. It’s straight up self hate. The longer the panic attacks last, the worse the toll they take on my spirit. I have prayed for God to lift this burden away from me, but I don’t think I was prepared in my prayer. I needed more. I needed to research the answers to my questions in His word, which is what I had neglected to do.
I am going to write down the AM/FM thoughts on index cards and carry them in my purse, and work on building a list of my own.
I combined all my “bullet points” into a paragraph of hope & affirmation:
Jesus is my advocate My advocate is stronger than my adversary. Jesus cancelled the debt of all my sins past, present & future. God isn’t focused on my failures – He sees the “gold” in me & wants to bring it out. Accusations do not come from God. God convicts, He does not condemn. He wants to give me a new starting place. My sin is not who I am. I am a woman who is becoming all God created me to be. I may not be quite who I want to be but I am not who I used to be.
Cynda- I LOVE THIS!!!! THANK YOU! I so get it!
After reading Renee’s AM/FM thoughts idea, I decided to put them into action (while clinging with a death grip to His promises) at an event last weekend with some friends. My first thoughts were that I wasn’t good enough and that they’re going to be others there that would know more/do a better job. But I put on my “I don’t care what you think about me because God thinks I’m fabulous” (maybe that’s not appropriate?) attitude and went! I ended up having a great time, met some new people, and created memories that I wouldn’t trade for anything. I know that if I would’ve stayed home I would’ve just been upset at myself for letting my doubt/AM thoughts win.
However, a new opportunity has approached and the pesky AM thoughts still come rolling in. I’m still praying about this opportunity – it is something that I feel is completely out of my element, but think it might be something that I’ve been praying for. I’m learning that transitioning your thoughts from AM to FM is a process and something I have to do everyday while trying to re-train my brain to instead of thinking “what if I fail” to think “what if I succeed.”
Dear Renee ~
I woke up with the “Bully”by my side and in my head this morning. It had everything to do with something my young-adult daughter said a few days ago. She has always proclaimed to be pro-life and anti-abortion, but apparently has been influenced by the world-view that life does not begin at conception. WOAH! What happened? Where did I go wrong? What didn’t I say? How could she even think this way? I’ve long since realized many mistakes in my parenting, but this?
In my morning devo – the Scripture I was taken to was Isaiah 5 where God planted a vineyard (Israel) and provided everything it needed to flourish and grow. The Scripture states that God “expected it to produce good grapes, But it produced only worthless ones.”
I don’t think that God took me to that Passage to tell me that my daughter is worthless or that my investment in her life was unfruitful – but to remind me that if God Himself instructed His children & provided everything they needed to produce “good fruit”; then what makes me think I could be or do anything to be a better parent than God?
I’m a day behind on this devo – but I believe it was in God’s timing that I heard these Scriptures & Truths today, so that I wouldn’t keep the “Bully” beside me all day long – listening to his lies that I’m not fit to be a mother or that God has given up on my child any more than I have.
Thank you Renee for a very timely word in due season.
Blessings ~ Jackie
hi, Renee I was reading all these comments, and I notice you are responding a lot in these comments. i’ve written many time in other posts, but because, you have responded a lot in this blog, to comments, I want to make sure that you have been reading my comments. I’m totally blind. I have an amazing computer with a speech program that will read me everything, i have to know to do the right key stroke commands, but it can do almost anything a regular computer can do. God has found me the best study. He is using this study to challenge me to spend some quiet time with him and listen because I talk, talk, talk, I’m repeating a lot of what I said in past blogs, I want to make sure you’re getting these. However, I am able to participate in this study. I get the e-mails. I’m able to hear the videos. I always thank God for such great teknology! I’ve never attended a study like this! It is so cool! we all encourage each other! It’s so cool! and all have the same struggles. I tried to download your book, was having trouble. one limitation my computer has, is I thought it just reads word files, your book is a p.d.f. file. However, my computer teacher just gave me special instructions, she said, sometimes, the speech program can read p.d.f. files, she said to open my adobi reader, and she gave me special commands. i just asked her how to open the adobi reader, I was having trouble. Anyway, I love, your discussion of am. f.m. thoughts, I wrote afew days ago, in the last blog and talked about someone named Joyce Myers! I’m sure a lot of you know about! I love listening to her! every day on TV She is great! I have so many negative people in my life, ny boy friend, and family members, it’s hard to take! They try so hard to make me miserable like them. the enemy uses other people to steal our joy. joyce Myers has a new name for the devil! joy theif! I love it! Every time, I want to take a thought captive, I’m going to say joy theif! joy theif! sorry, for repeating myself so many times, but Renee, I noticed you responding a lot to people in this blog, and i want to make sure you get my messages Okay, talk again soon! and I love reading all the comments! and getting to know everyone!
I find the concept of failure being a postive thing as a revolutionary thought. I have so many times allowed failure to beat me down and make me want to curl up into a ball on the floor and just give up. I use to not try new and different things because of my fear of failure, yet last year I decided that I was not going to let my life be ruled by fear, the very thing that Scripture tells us is not of God in the first place. Most of the time, I have been able to live my life this past year and half by not letting fear take over. However, after a year of filled with many deaths and changes, some days this has been a struggle. When I have allowed fear to take over, I became bitter and angry and then starts the cycle of feeling like a failure again. The fact that failure can help to turn me into a more confident woman of God gives me hope.
I was also thankful for the description of condemnation and conviction. I have struggled with the two and did not realized how much until I read chapter 7. Thank you for the explaination on the two.
God is FOR ME! This truth is starting more and more to sink in and God keeps reminding me so that I won’t forget – through a Word last night and then the video here, through a song this morning… it’s God whispering His truth to my heart replacing the insecurity and the restlessness even though my circumstances haven’t changed – they still seem scary – God is bringing me peace. Praise Him!
This morning I turned on Kari Jobe’s album (not thinking of this!) and now this song is running through my head and I’m going to try to keep it there. And in my heart. God is using your words, Renee. Thank you for being willing to speak and publish them.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Ffdbo9Hypo (Here’s Kari Jobe’s song: For Me) : )
Yesterday, I started re-reading Ch 7 to see what would “really” stand out, since the day before had left me in whirlwind of stuff. With tears in my eyes God showed me, “…how critical I have become-not only of myself but also of my family”. That is in a different order than Renee’s words for a reason. God showed me first that what we perceive as failure isn’t always an actual failure. I struggle with the desire for a clean, organized and orderly house. Satan has convinced me that since I can’t achieve it, I am a failure. What God showed me is that an unkept house isn’t failing….it is living. Something my husband has tried to tell me for years, but of course, I didn’t believe him. (It is so much easier to hear it from God…lol) Unfortunately, instead of only being critical of myself on this issue, I started pointing fingers at my family and how much they contribute to my “inadequacies”. If he would just pick up his clothes..if she would just help a little..etc.
In pointing fingers we allow bitterness and resentment into our hearts. Towards others, towards situations and most importantly, towards God.
I need to spend some more time focusing on this new revelation, but this is where it is at so far.
LaDena,
This has been one of my struggles too, as silly as it seems to type this…my mom was a clean “freak” and so a “clean house” has always been an unconcious standard of worthiness for me. When I can’t manage it the way I “think” it should be done I–when I am listening to Satan’s lies–I start blaming myself for failing, then when that becomes too painful, I begin to blame and accuse my husband and kids…after all they are a contributing factor in my failure and ought to “share” the blame and the shame (at least that’s how the “logic” goes) I am learning slowly (been working on this for a year and a half now) to identify the thoughts behind the anger and the frustration and the ‘literal panic’ I feel when the house gets really messy–the thoughts of not being in control, the fear of being judged by others, the belief that I am a failure because I can’t even keep my house clean…then I take out my index cards…I have verses written on index cards that I just read again and again to replace the lies with truth–and God is honoring that. I STILL ‘lose it’ over the house, but it happens less and even when I feel like a failure over the housework, or parenting, or work….you name it…the lies in my heart are slowly being replaced by God’s truth. I just hang on for dear life to Phillipians 1:6 that reassures me I’m a “work in progress”…because I’ve even used my failure to get the “God stuff” right as more evidence that I was a failure, but it’s just not true! My heavenly Father ASSURES me that I am a work in progress and that I will ALWAYS be a work in progress until I get to heaven. I don’t have to get this right all of the time and He STILL loves me! I wish I could live in that confident place all the time! (but I’m a work in progress so I’m okay with just “moving in that direction” most of the time…I KNOW my Father is pleased with that!! )
LaDena and Sandy – Thank you for being so courageous and honest about sharing your struggles with the desire for a clean house! What a trap that is! I never saw it as a trap that the enemy is using to keep us from getting closer to God! In what you have shared I see my anger and resentment and sense of failure! I too blame my husband and family and then the bitterness just brews 🙁 The time and energy I spend angry and bitter could be time spent with GOD!! I have so much to learn from all of you,
Thank you again for sharing:)
Karen
Sandy- Thank you so much for sharing! I am that way too… and when my house is out of order- I’m out of order… It drives me crazy…. and if I don’t keep up it becomes so overwhelming to me. I panic too. My Mom God Bless her- she had the cleanest most organized house on the block- always had dinner on the table at dusk – she was so on it!!! so I understand… but because of what you shared I won’t let it drive me crazy no more- when I’m at the edge of losing it I’m going to remember “I am a work in progress’ .My heavenly Father ASSURES me that I am a work in progress and that I will ALWAYS be a work in progress until I get to heaven. I don’t have to get this right all of the time and He STILL loves me! I wish I had an automatic switch in my head to set this off when I feel the BLAHS!
Thank you for sharing!
Thank you Renee for the words of encouragement, i am in a situation where i keep on failing one module and i cannot get my degree and also in a job where i dont like but i know once i get this module i can get out of this job. I thank God because with God nothing is impossible and i am trusting God that what he has started he will finish. Thank you Renee you are such a blessing to my life and i have even bought the book for my friends.
Thank you for your message on AM and FM thoughts. I was crying as I listened to your message because I have felt attacked these last few weeks. I am living in China with roommates. We are all Christian with different personalities. I am getting ready to return to the US in a few weeks and they have been giving me many suggestions, which sometimes over whelm me. As a result, I have gotten mad and have felt very guilty about my angry feelings. I just subscribed to your email messages and I have enjoyed listening to two of your video messages. I have a heart for China, but I do not know or am afraid to seek what God wants me to do to help people in China. I need prayers for courage to search inside my heart for upsetting things in my past and I need the courage to face those things. I also ask for prayers for my roommates. Thank you for listening and I will also pray that your ministry continues to touch many other women who are hurting like me. God Bless.