Do you ever wonder why you didn’t get the gift of confidence like others you know? I used to feel slighted by that. But over time I realized there was more to confidence than just being born with it.
Lasting confidence comes from knowing and believing that our value isn’t determined by our performance or competence. But that is not always easy to believe because we have an opponent who will do all he can to convince us otherwise.
Some avoid talking about the devil because they don’t want to give him too much attention. But I think it’s important that we realize we have an enemy. The Bible calls him the accuser of the brethren. Satan loves to accuse us and make us feel worthless so that we never become all that God created us to be!
One of the ways he works is by getting us to doubt ourselves. In my P31 devotion today, I shared how a few years ago I realized I was going along with the enemy’s schemes every time I’d do something wrong and then ask: What’s wrong with me?
A few years ago, it dawned on me that every time I asked, “What’s wrong with me?” I was actually telling myself something was wrong with me. Then I would try to figure out my elusive fault so I could change it or hide it. Do you ever do that?
It’s not what God wants us doing to ourselves, but Satan loves for us to focus on all that is wrong with us (real or perceived) so that we become consumed by self-doubt and condemnation as a result. Peter tells us what we need to do about him: “Keep your mind clear, and be alert. Your opponent the devil is prowling around like a roaring lion as he looks for someone to devour.” (1 Pet. 5:8, GW).
Keeping Our Minds Clear
Jesus says in John 14:26 that God has given us an Advocate, the Holy Spirit, to teach us everything and to remind us of all that Christ said. The Holy Spirit lives in us as believers, and He is great at helping us keep our minds clear. Let’s ask Him daily to clean out the clutter of insecurity, pride, and Satan’s lies in your thoughts and replace them with the clarity of Truth.
Staying Alert
We can stay alert by listening to our thoughts. If our thoughts are against us, then our feelings will be too. What we think determines how we feel, and our feelings often determine how we live.
Think –> Feel–> Live
However, with the power of the Holy Spirit and God’s Promises, we can ask Jesus to change the way we think, which will change the way we feel and eventually transform the way we live!
The next time you start having negative feelings about yourself, stop and ask the Holy Spirit to show you what you’re thinking that is making you feel that way. Then compare your thoughts about yourself, or the circumstances you are in, to God’s thoughts. Do they match? If not, find a promise in God’s Word to replace the lie that has filled your heart with self-critical thoughts For instance:
- When you feel defeated, focus on the truth that God says, “In all these things [you] are more than [a conqueror] through him who loved [you]…” (Rom. 8:37, NIV)
- When you feel worthless, focus on the truth that God says, “You are precious and honored in my sight, and . . . I love you.” (Isa. 43:4, NIV)
- When we feel inadequate, focus on the truth that God says, “’You are my witnesses,’ declares the Lord, ‘and my servant whom I have chosen, so that you may know and believe me and understand that I am he.’” (Isa. 43:10, NIV)
If we have Christ in us because of our faith in Him as our Savior, then we have God’s power and promises available to live with a confident heart!
* If this is an area of your life you sense God leading you to dig deeper into, more about this part of my journey and this topic are in chapter 6 of A Confident Heart,
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As part of a little celebrating we’re doing at my house, (see note below) we’re giving away 5 copies of A Confident Heart along Confident Heart Scripture stickies we’re having created this month!! Just leave your name or a comment to enter by clicking on “Share Your Thoughts” to let me know what God has you thinking about after reading this post, or my devotion. I’ll be reading your comments today and praying for you. It would be my honor to do that.
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Today my family and I are celebrating some “only God could do this” news we recently received…over 20,000 copies of A Confident Heart are in the hands of women around the US, and it’s now being published in Korean!! We’re totally blown away – that in the midst of my father’s passing, my daughter’s speech disorder diagnosis and my mom’s hospitalization all during my book release – God is doing immeasurable more than we could even imagine. I know part of it is women reading reviews and hearing from other women so I want to thank you for sharing those, too. JJ and I love reading the stories in the reviews and seeing what God is saying to your hearts through the words He poured through mine in each chapter!!
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I am always stuck in performance mode, I feel tears in my eyes just thinking about it, thank you for reminding me that I am good enough just the way I am right now, not after I finally succeed at something or finally find my place in the church, it is right now, I need to remind myself that I am loved not because of what I do but because of what Jesus has done for me!
Trials, Faith, & Hope
Most of my life had been spent stuggling, feeling uncertain, and living in fear. I was very insecure, but I always trusted in God to help me through life’s difficulities. It took time for my heart to heal after my mother passed away and sometimes, it still heals.
I had several jobs and even went back to college after my mother passed away.
It was not until February 1984 that I moved away from home, leaving my dad. I was twenty-nine years old.
With much prayer and thought about the future ahead, I enlisted in the army for three years. Proverbs 3:5 became my heartfelt verse. I had ask the Lord for help getting an office job, a husband and guidance in my work, but I also agreed to share the gospel with others.
It wasn’t long my prayers were answered. God sent me to Germany. After a few months a chaplin assistant on post introduced me to Gordon, my husband. We went to church off post and we even had guard duty together a couple of times. It wasn’t long before we were talking about getting married. In August 1985, we were married in Gessien, Germany. I had one year left in the army and after I finished my time in Germany, we went home to meet our families together. Both of our churches gave us a wedding shower. His family in Michigan, my family in Mississippi. What a blessing it was! Then, Gordon returned to Germany for a few months, but joined me later at Ft. Stewart, Georgia where I finished out my term in the army.
You would think after 25 years, I would finally get it!…I guess it took some counselling and reading this book to see how to make the changes I needed. God was very patient with me. Thank you for sharing!
I cannot thank you enough for your devotional here and at P31. Despite being a Christian most of my life, I have fought negative thinking. (I’m now 54 years old). Thank you so much for sharing the truths God laid on your heart. When I do something wrong, I, too, have said to myself, “Oh Sherry, what’s wrong with you”, “Good grief, Sherry”, or “Oh, Sherry”, all of them being forms of pointing the finger at myself. I need to read your book and intend to soon. I’m so happy for how well it’s doing. Unfortunately it’s an indicator of how prevalent the need is among women today. Hopefully that will change over time! God Bless You and yours!!
Today I am thinking about how God will test our confidence in him. The scripture I read on your blog 1 peter 5:8. is just what I need to do to show him my confidence in Him and my self. This scripture is just what the devil is trying to do to me but I am going to follow these instructions.I am also going to ask the Holy sprit to clear my mind and clear out the cluter
This hits straight home to me. I have been struggling with this issue for several weeks now. “What’s wrong with me?” Why am I so this? Why am I so that? It is a constant battle. Thank you, thank you for the reminder that “I am fearfully and wonderfully made”.
Thank you for this reminder today Renee. Those lies sometimes come just out of the blue and cause us to doubt and it can be a challenging moment. But I know that Jesus loves me and If I look upto his promises, this doubts can be replaced with lasting confidence. Would love to receive a copy of your book which am sure has changed and is still changing many lives around the world.
God Bless!
Today is the first day I’ve read your post, thanks to a friend liking it on Facebook. I struggle frequently with thoughts about “whats wrong with me?” This morning as I dressed I was really thinking about how I’ve been living my life based on feelings. Do I feel that God has really called me to do what I once believed with confidence? Am I choosing things that are bad for me in the long run because they make me feel ‘good’ in the moment, or when I’m tired and just need someone or something to say I’m really not as bad as I feel. I know that I am missing out on the life God planned because my feelings tell me I’m just not good enough. I’ve done bible studies on replacing lies we believe with the truth and somehow lost the power of that as I crumbled under the false evidence of less than desirable circumstances or a past that just won’t stop hounding me. Thank you for sharing this truth… God’s timing is perfect… so so perfect. He told me I’m living by my feelings and only a few hours later you tell me to change the way I feel by listening to Him. Please pray that I can find strength by His power to live in that place and move out, doing His will in the confidence that comes from Him.
Thank you!!! Thank you!!! Thank you!!! For sharing the blessing of this devotional. It could not have been more perfect! I would love to read your book. Thank you for the opportunity to read it. God Bless you for your obedience to share such a powerful message.
“When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they are not wise.” (2 Cor. 10:12 NIV)
This just hit me like a ton of bricks!
Renee,
Thank you for another awesome reminder of
who we really are in Christ. I know God is speaking
to me and wanting me to know that no matter what
rejection and abandonment I faced as both a child and adult
that through his love I can be confident in him.
Thank you for these reminders!
L. Nicole
Thejourneythroughfaith.blogspot.com
Thanks so much for th wonderful devotional – I really needed this one. It spoke to me in such a mighty way and I can’t wait to read the book.
Self-esteem has always been an issue for me. Feelings of inadequacy (about my weight, my hair, my cooking, my worth, you name it), have been with me throughout my 58 years. Since becoming a Christian four years ago, though, I have come to realize that the only one whose opinion of me matters, is my Lord and Savior. He sees me as very worthy and adequate. But, there are times when I allow that old Deceiver to enter my thoughts. Please pray for me as I am still a work in progress.
Renee, I just thought I’d encourage you by letting you know that I posted the “Don’t Throw Away Your Confidence” handout from She Speaks on the fridge (at a strategically low height). The other day my almost 9 year old daughter paused and pointed to it and said, “I like that.” I think I’ve noticed her reading it from time to time. I think it’s just what she needs (as well as what I need). She’s much younger than her 2 siblings and I think she really struggles with confidence. Isn’t it cool how God uses everything we do in so many far reaching ways? Have a great day and be blessed!
How critical it is to have a positive thought life but it is hard when life requires for an extended period of time that you make lemonade out of lemons! And if you were brought up by negative parents, that thought process is certainly ingrained. Truly only the Lord can change this if He chooses to. Thank you for offering such loving support!
Hi Renee,
Today devotional spoke to me in such great volumes!! I am so glad that I signed up for Proverbs 31 it just seems like “wow” I am not the only one who goes through things like this. Self doubt and insecurities have been such huge factors the devil has spoken to me for many years of my life. i am now faced with a very tough decision and to this very day, when I know in my heart I have to face my giant, I still hear him telling me “are you sure”, “is this really what you should be doing”! I pray for direction and to hear Gods’ sweet voice whispering, “yes my child, this is what you are to do”! Please keep me in prayer as turn my thoughts around to the certainty of God’s promises and know, trust and believe He is with me always!!!
Have a blessed day!!
When God wants to get a point across, He brings it in multiple forms. This is the fourth thing today I have read about where my thoughts need to be. Thanks.
How encouraging your devotion is today. Seems a common struggle with women today is confidence. Your message reminded me of my identity in Christ, and that with confidence in Him, I am empowered and capable of achieveing all He has for me.
I so hope I win a copy of your book. Your devotions along with comments from your readers has certainly triggered a yearning in my spirit to grow deeply in Him and to embrace the call on my life, to be the woman He designed me to be. Blessings to you. 🙂
Thanks for this devotion Renee! God is confirming that He is hearing my prayer for my son! I just have to hold on to the Promise that God is Faithful, and that my son will make a complete u-turn back to Him! The enemy wants me to believe that he is winning but God reminds me that He has already won!!! Thanks for helping build my confidence in this!!! I would LOVE to win a copy of your book!!! 😉
Thanks for the encouragement today! I need to be constantly reminded of who I belong to as I work in a large company. the corporate world is not encouraging and it’s easy to be critical of my work which turns into critical of who i am.
A very good friend is completely consumed with what a horrible person she must be to have the life she is living. I have sent this to her – sincerely hoping she will see that she is a wonderful woman that is just letting the devil take her down. I hope her perception of her life turns the other way VERY SOON!!! I have forwarded this page to her and have been trying to get her started in reading her bible so she can find some peace in her life. Thanks for this!
Thanks,