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Renee Swope

Encouraging and equipping moms to parent with God's grace and confidence.

Read An Excerpt: Chapter 1 & 2

{week 2} To Be Known Is to Be Loved

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From Chapter 2, A Confident Heart

“Jesus knew Sam’s (the Samaritan woman’s) story and He knows yours. The Greek word for “know” is yada. It means a deep emotional experience; a bonding between two people when one truly feels the emotions of the other. Jesus knows your pain, fears, doubts, and disappointments. He understands your dreams and desires.

Although some of us feel uncomfortable that God knows so much about us, it is good to be known, to be listened to and not judged. Jesus is the only One who can meet our deepest needs to be accepted and delighted in simply because of who we are. We can offer nothing but our presence, and He will desire us just the same…

There are many religions but did you know that Christianity is the only faith that offers a relationship with the living God? We don’t just know about our God; our God wants us to know Him. And we were created for that kind of relationship.

Jesus created us to have lasting soul-security in knowing we are valued and pursued by the One who knows and loves us—the One who created our inmost being and wove us together in our mother’s womb (Ps. 139:13). Have you let the gospel of God’s grace move from your head to your heart, so that you know without a doubt you are known intimately and loved completely by God?” (p. 40 printed copy)

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Our word this week is  “Known”

Our verse of the week is Jeremiah 1:5 – “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart…” (NIV)

This week’s video message is below. Please click the arrow to watch it  – all the way through. You’ll be so glad you did.

(from video script)

I WANT TO BE KNOWN
I want someone to look at my face
And not just see two eyes, a nose,
a mouth and two ears
But to see all that I am, and could be
all my hopes, loves and fears…

And YOU know me
You actually know me
all of me and everything about me
Every thought inside and hair on top of my head
Every hurt stored up, every hope, every dread
My past and my future, all I am and could be
You tell me everything,
You tell me about ME
And that which is spoken by another would bring hate and condemnation
Coming from Youu brings love, grace, mercy, hope and salvation
I’ve heard of One to come
who could save a wretch like me
And here in my presence, You say
I AM HE…

(read full script here)

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Today’s Assignment:

  • Read this week’s memory verse (Jeremiah 1:5). Ask God to remind you all week that He knows the way you long to be known, pursued and loved!
  • Start or continue reading chapter 2. Remember, take your time and highlight or underline sentences that resonate in your heart.

Connect in Community:

What about today’s video or sentences in Chapter 2 resonate most with you?

  • Please click “Share Your Thoughts” below this post and do just that.  (Remember to go to my website to do this)
  • Optional: I’d love for you to share one of them on our Confident Heart Community Page and/or share them with me on Twitter (@reneesswope). I’d love to retweet them! Also let’s use #AConfidentHeart so we can encourage one another and find them easily.

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I’ll announce last week’s winners in my Weds. post.

Comments

  1. pg. 31—–“Being honest about who we are and how we are doing is especially risky when it comes to our insecurities. We fear that if people know that we doubt ourselves, they’ll start doubting us too.”—–As a woman, this is me!

  2. Just a question, or request I should say. Would it be possible to put the questions on a printable download as well? I am new at using a Kindle and as much as a like it, I miss being able to write in my book and answer the questions on paper.
    I am truly enjoying everything about the study!

  3. What a powerful chapter and a powerful video. It is such a relief to know that because God’s love is perfect, I don’t have to be. I want to get to know God better and I want Him to know me so that I can have the gift He offers – the gifts of transformation and salvation.

  4. “Now I keep to myself and by that I mean the pain that keeps me in my own private jail” speaks volumes to my life. I have known and loved our Heavenly Father, His son and my Savior Jesus, and my helper the Holy Ghost since I was a little girl. I have always lived my life openly for Him, yet consistent ridicule and rejection from those in my life who are supposed to be a blessing to me brings me to this statement. I am so thankful for this book and on-line study to be strengthened by other sisters in Christ. Thank you!

  5. There are so many things that have resonated with me from chapter 2. “I tried to earn my worth through a performance based value system, convinced that if I did the right things, said the right things, wore the right things, and looked the right way, then I’d be worth staying for.” Reading this was like having an out of focus picture suddenly come in to focus. It resonated deep inside me because this is my story. While my parents never physically left me they did leave me emotionally. “I wanted to be known and loved for who I was. Yet if I let my guard down, I was afraid someone would say I was too sensitive or too serious. It had happened before. So I pretended everything was fine.” I could have written these words.

    • Heather, I also lived with parents who were emotionally distant. I know now that they have loved me all along, but they never expressed it. Like you I tried to earn their attention, affection, and love. Chapter two was as if I had written it myself- I was reading it and thought- I could have written this in present tense… and I look forward to being able to talk about these struggles in past tense some day when God has helped me to walk through it to the other side. Yes, emotional absence is just as painful as physical absence, in my opinion.

  6. Ch2 is so challenging to me. I don’t know if it’s convicting or I just can’t wrap my head around it or what it is, but it’s a tough one for me to swallow. Each time I read it I’m pushed even further. This whole idea of letting people (or even God for that matter) in to be known on a deep and intimate level is so foreign to me I guess. When you’ve spent 30 of the last 37 yrs running away or hiding from letting ANYONE in this ch is a lot to chew on!

  7. LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the video clip. It is perfect for our chapter and for our hearts this week.

  8. Where do I start? Do we really have to let others know how we’re really doing? Are we high maintenance if we do? And no I do not want my family, friends, or co-workers see that the paint is peeling, that I have flaws,bad days and not positive or inspirational at times. Yes over the years I have learned to say: “I’m fine.”
    Although I do tell them I’m fine, underneath I am not and I really want to say: I am FRAZZLED, IRRITATED, and EXHAUSTED! My friend sent me a text yesterday that read: OMG , enough is enough, this has got to be wearing you to a frazzle. And yes, days lately are stressful, yes I do feel at my limits some days, with husbands health issues, dealing with insurance companies, not to mention workman’s comp. But I try to remind myself each day, that God is in control, that he carried us through a major motorcycle accident years ago, that affected us both, not only health wise but made our marriage stronger. I was told by my mom: that this will either break you or make you stronger, thank you mom. I have seen how hiding and isolation has been in control just like it was shared that I have been wearing a mask, because I heard many times, let it go, your to sensitive, or to emotional. So yes I have stepped into the shadow. But the most hurtful is when a love one, will not support you on a decision that you have had a difficult time making, even though they might not understand why I made the decision I made, I would like for them just to support them., to say I understand this was difficult even though I do not agree I do support you.
    So for now I just continue to pray for I know that God Loves Me, just the way I am, because He made me, and that He alone knows me from the inside of my heart to my outside appearance. I find comfort in listening to the Christian Music Station daily and I find meaning with the words and songs. I have learned so much just in 2 Chapters, I almost can not put the book down. Thank you Renee for your love of the Lord, your ministry and your fellowship. God Blesss

  9. The very title of the chapter is underlined twice in my book. “Because God’s Love is Perfect, I Don’t Have To Be.” What a simple truth, but SO powerful to a woman who has been a perfectionist for as long as I can remember… in order to earn affection and love. Renee’s story was regarding a father who left her physically, mine was present in the home but absent emotionally. I cannot remember him ever telling me he loved me, and he only said he was proud of me when I achieved something exceptional. So that’s what I learned love was- performance based. Thankfully I can say that my relationship with my earthly father and my father as a person have been transformed by Christ in recent years, and that same man now embraces me when I visit and tells me he loves me on the phone. How amazing is the power of God! I still fight against the patterns of thought and behavior that became a part of me, but I am blessed that my relationship with him has been healed.

    I am blessed to have two girl friends with whom I can be extremely vulnerable; I do my hiding in my marriage. The one person who I should be able to bare my soul to, I struggle the most to do so with. Not necessarily because of anything he’s done- but because I am insecure. I don’t want him to regret making the choice to join his life with mine if he sees my darker places. One of my friends has recently encouraged me in this area… but it is hard. I know that perfect love casts out fear… but we are human and imperfect and that scares me. Yet at the same time “I longed for someone to see past the exterior facade and look into the secret places…” Constant inner tension about this in my relationship to a wonderful godly man.

    I have grabbed on to Philippians 1:6 as a promise that speaks to my perfectionism! It’s okay if I’m not ‘there’ yet, because He will get me there- and Christ is much more reliable than I am to do so! It gives me hope on the days that doubt whispers “You’re not good enough” or “You’re doing it all wrong.” I can now shout back- “That’s because I’m not yet complete. I’ll get there.”

  10. I have heard the story of the “woman at the well” all my life, yet it never dawned on me that Jesus specifically planned His timing and His journey at be at the well at this exact time. It seems pretty simplistic, but to think that the Savior of the world would schedule His day so that He could meet with this woman and change her life just blows me away! Such a personal God we have to do this for us. Wow!

  11. I think the questions at the end of the chapter actually revealed more to me than reading the chapter itself. I have realized this before, but I see God as a rules-based judge on his throne, waiting for me to do something wrong and then punish me for it. I don’t know where this comes from, but I’ve had this view of him since I was a child. I love my dad, but he was always a “Do as I say, because I said” kind of father. I’ve never believed that works will save a person, but I have believed the lie that God will reign down all sorts of problems on us if we don’t follow all the “rules.” It’s hard for me to break this but I believe God is opening my eyes. Re-reading Sam’s story, I realize that I don’t give God credit for pursuing me. I often don’t feel it, but I’m sure it’s because of my distorted view of Him. He is a God of mercy, tenderness, grace. And yes, He is a Judge, but He is the most fair Judge there is. I often feel distant to Him, but I know that’s my fault. I just have to figure out how to listen to God’s truths and not satan’s lies. Starting to pray for discernment and wisdom.

    • I fully understand. I’m praying that I, too, can start viewing God as He really is.

  12. Knowing God has been such a thrill in my life journey. This chapter and video just reiterates the awesome bond God has with each one of us. That bond can’t be broken as long as we don’t let it! God is Good! All the Time!

  13. The video for this week was really good. I enjoyed reading the blog about “being fine” too. Sometimes when I am not fine which seems to be daily now, I complain to people who are closest to me, and everyone else just sees me as fine. In our busy culture when we ask people how they are it is more of a greeting like hi than actually seeing how they really are. Something I try to work on with others is when I ask them how they are doing is to wait for the answer. This is kinda ackward though because they are usually just giving one word answers and keep it moving.

    Something else I struggle is the motivation to change my attitude from one of lack of confidence to having confident in Christ. I made a comment about how the paper I wrote was awful, and a friend of mine said I am always saying that everything I do is terrible. I always have a negative view of myself. It is really hard to want to change this attitude because it is so engrained in me. Growing up and still today, all I hear form my family is what I am doing is not good or good enough. I am so stuck in a rut. In addition, sometimes I get to the point where I don’t know what to say to God so I don’t talk to Him. I have many areas that I need guidance in, but I feel like most of my prayers are focused on emotional things I need to get over or things that are focused on the day to day instead of the future.

  14. This chapter and verse has spoken volumes to me this week because since the new year I have been dealing with the pain of a severed relationship while simultaneously healing from a traumatic childhood. I have recognize in dealing with both circumstances that a deep desire to be affirmed has been echoing from my heart. I don’t want to want or feel like I need the affirmations of these people so this week I am praying for God to open my mind and my heart to the realization that I have all that I need in Him, that He loves me and that I am good enough just as I am.

  15. What is really coming out for me as I’m reading is that I’ve used the “I’m fine” phrase for way too long. I’ve been hurting deeply for years and I have repressed those feelings. This has led to me being depressed and doubtful of who I am, my calling, and where i want to go (career-wise). God is using this study to help me see how it’s my own facade that has me where I’m at. I look at other people and i see them smiling and having fun and I wonder to myself “will I ever be happy?” I’m not talking about the surface happy that comes and goes, but about the deep-down, joyful happiness. I’m always sad. This leaves my husband bewildered b/c he doesn’t know what to do. He is a new Christian with one foot still left in the world. I have also had one foot in the world these past few years and i feel God telling me to come back in and let HIM heal the wonds that have been keeping me in my “just fine” place. It’s a process and takes one step at a time, but I think i’m learning to trust Him to heal my dark places that have been glossed over. I am looking forward to more of this study and to God healing me and to not having eternal sadness all around me. 🙂 It’s possible…God has shown me. I just need to let Him take me to the place I need to be.

  16. I keep coming back to the video b/c each time i listen i hear something new. Today it was “you tell me about me”. The thought of any one knowing me well enough to tell me about me brings regret for time wasted in foolish pursuits. Then I stop and think this is GOD who knows me this well. It is humbling to think HE still wants me. I am thankful for God’s mercy and grace b/c without them I will never make it to heaven. So I continue with the study to rid myself of secrets and shame. Thank you Abba for being a father to the fatherless and promising to never leave me or forsake me.

  17. What stood out to me most in Chapter 2…”Jesus is the only one who can meet our deepest needs to be accepted and delighted in simply because of who we are, we can offer nothing but our presence and He will desire us just the same.”. Why is it so easy for us to seek to have our needs met by something or someone else, when we know this fact????? I also loved the statement, “our God wants us to know Him.” That really amazes me daily, that my Creator wants to know me!!!! I have not had very many close spiritual friendships other than a very few, very special and dear sisters in Christ, who happened to move so we are separated by distance, I have been frustrated trying to build other special spiritual friendships and the lack of desire from others to “make time” to really get to know one another. The whole time though, so thankful that God wants to know me, spend time with me, and I have real,y sought comfort and encouragement from the time I am spending with Him.

    The last statement from this chapter I loved “The only way we’ll have a confident heart is if we move beyond knowing about God to knowing and relying on Him, depending on His Word with our whole heart, mind, and soul,”. This has been and will continue to be my focus moving forward.

  18. We each are worthy. Funny how you can accept God’s gift of salvation the work of the cross and chatter to Him all day long yet still not truly understand that He gets it. He gets you. Us. We each of us. He knows us. Me. You
    What a gift!
    Funny: how I’m in a bible study called “The Woman at the Well” and I never really thought about what that really was all about just the basic story.
    Thank you Renee

  19. God is certainly moving here. “Have you let the gospel of God’s grace move from your head to your heart, so that you know without a doubt you are known intimately and loved completely by God?” At first my head answered, well of course. I’ve always known Jesus in my life. I know His word for me, His promises. To not harm me, but for a hope and a future. I’m raising four daughters and teaching them His promises. His love. But suddenly conviction hit. And whoa!Nelly! Did I ever want to just ignore that initial twinge. I have His joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart, right? Really? Suddenly I stopped to look at my heart. Knowing He knows me. Knows all my insecurities. My cowardice. Deep down where I am so scared I’ll do the wrong thing. So scared to act if I don’t know for sure what to do. So sure I cannot possibly be the one He needs here. To do this thing that is staring me in the face. To speak the words that need to be spoken. When everything around me says it’s down to me. What I decide. Deep down where I finally have to admit, am I really trusting Him? To lead me to do the right thing? And he SEES that! He KNOWS that. To face knowing that He knows? A fear, a hesitation creeps in. And yet. And yet. AND YET!!! He knows and He loves me. How incredible. And He meets me right there. At my well.

    I read the poem first. But when I watched the video…wow. I realize, I SO want Him to meet me at the well! At my well. To make me face myself. To fill me down to my heart with His living water. Pure living water. So I can be strengthened to…do. Whatever it is that needs to be done. In His love. In His way. With whatever abilities He’s given me. Confidently. To His glory.

  21. “Sometimes I think we tell people we’re fine even when we’re not, because we want to be fine. Or we hope that by saying we are fine, eventually we will be…Although we tell people we’re fine, what we really mean is that we are Frazzled, Irritated, Neurotic, and Exhausted!…Pretending leads to hiding and isolation…Eventually, though, we find ourselves in the shadows of doubt, convinced that we aren’t worth knowing or pursuing. Slowly we begin to believe we have to be perfect to be loved and accepted…O how I longed for someone to see past the exterior facade and look into the secret places of my heart. I wanted to be known and loved for who I was. Yet if I let my guard down, I was afraid someone would say I was too sensitive or too serious…” These passages together explain me. Who I really am. Unfortunately in our culture, when you are asked “How are you?” many people don’t expect a long response about how you really are, they want to hear “I’m fine” so they can keep going and move on. I’ve tried to respond truthfully, but briefly, just to be true to myself. But how do I explain so much in so little time? Now when I respond “I’m fine,” I know there are 2 meanings 🙂 and whichever one I mean is for me to know whether I want to explain or not…

  22. So loved the poem!!! It is awesome!!! Chapter 2 has spoke to me in so many ways and helped me to realize things I didn’t know even existed!! The question that spoke to me in this chapter was #6. We were ask to read John 4 again and see if we can relate. As I did, God showed me that we are so much like “Sam”. When she answers Jesus about wanting the water that will make her thirst no more so she doesnt have come to the well anymore. What God showed me is that for me I am like her sometimes when I want a quick fix instead of dealing with the problem. I just want him to help me and not dig deep to find out the main issue. He spoke to me and said that through the pain I give you wisdom so when you opt for the easy way out you miss out!!! All I could say way”Whoa”!!! Thank you God for your wisdom and knowledge!! Thank you for loving me even when I don’t feel lovable!!! All I can say is my Abba Father is awesome!!!! So glad I join this bible study and a big thanks to Renee for being such an obedient servant and writing it!!!

  23. I am going to STOP asking Jesus to change the course of my day and START asking Him to change the course of my life.

  24. So glad to know God knows me, and because He knows me this way, I am totally and abundantly loved by Him. No matter what I do, I know He loves me, and will help me up when I fall. He will hear me when I am hurting and not ridicule me. He will forgive me when I am lost… Man, our God is good! This has to stick! I never really just sat and thought about how much God knows about me. He knows everything, but He still sent His son to die.. BEFORE, I was born.. He knew I would slap Him in the face with sin, but He died and rose anyways. Man, our God is good!

  25. Loved this video and Chapter 2 spoke to me. One thing that got to me was where it says that “pretending leads to hiding and isolation.” That is me big time. I put up walls and don’t let anyone in. I can relate to “Sam.” I have had relationship issues as well as isolating myself from the world. Unfortunately there is so much condemnation in the church as well as the world. I am so glad that Jesus loves me with all of my imperfections.

  27. “To be known is to be loved, to be loved is to be known”…”you actually know me, all of me and everything about me”.. Wow!!!

    “Now I keep to myself and by that I mean the pain that keeps me in my own private jail…”. This stood out to me in that when we keep things to ourselves, we hold ourselves in that jail, and how freeing it is to share with others, even when it can be so hard to open up……it is so freeing. Satan wants us to stay in jail, not God!!!!

    “Let me run back to town, this is way too much for just me.”. This also stood out to me because I have really felt Jesus calling me to be bold in sharing Him with others, and not letting my fears or doubts stop me from doing that…… Like Sam, she ran back to others to tell them all about Jesus….. What great examples to follow! What an encouragement as I’ve been praying for boldness.

  29. I finished Ch 2 and watched the video again. Don’t have time to answer questions yet . This stirs up all kinds of feelings in me. Thinking about rejection as a child and a young woman. At 62 I’m starting to get that Jesus will never reject me. I grew up in a religion that portrayed God as distant and angry. Add to that growing up not know my earthly father; my mom divorcing her 2nd husband who I thought was my father; My grandmother telling me at age 7 not to be sad and showing me a picture of a strange man and telling me that was my real father and this should be our “secret”. I grew up afraid of men. My uncle molested me. I looked for validation at every man that showed me any interest.. Lots for me to learn and I’m happy to be in this study. I’m working on telling my secrets so I don’t have to carry that heavy burden anymore. Thanks to Renee for sharing her story and giving us a chance to do the same. God is good.

  30. As I read chapter two where Renee says “we begin to believe we have to be perfect to be loved and accepted.” I had to stop and reflect on what the word Perfect meant to me. To be perfect to me was be what every one wanted of me Before long I was trying to be so many people I lost sight of me. Everyone seemed to want me for what they could make me into to satisfy their need. So the people- pleaser was born. There was no chance to develop into someone I wanted to be or had the chance to be I was so busy being what “others” wanted me to be. So I never developed confidence to try something on my own, that would mean I was alone and I needed someones approval. I’m still that way in a lot of areas.

  33. truly loved it…..it really got me fired up in the fact that HE loves me for me…always has and always will. HE doesn’t judge me for my wrong doings, but come to me for me to seek him so he can get to know me better….I can’t even put into words how much this video touched me. I will be sharing it with others for sure!! Thank you for this study!
    Blessings to all (love reading the posts from everyone else)

  34. For to be known is to be loved
    And to be loved is to be known

    .. I want to be known and I want others to be known. Thank the Lord for he is good.

  35. I love this verse! Especially today because it is my birthday. To realize He knew me and loved me before He formed me and He set me apart is a miracle. To think about it makes me know I am special and He has a purpose for me. It is hard to express in words but this is the greatest birthday wish I could have recived today! Thank-you Jesus!!!!!!!!
    I love you!

  36. “And you know me
    You actually know me
    all of me and everything about me
    It is absolutely amazing that even though God knows all of my faults and inadequacies (in my doubting mind) that he still loves me, truly loves me. It is through his love that I am finding the confidence to shed my barriers and walls and really work to be great and not paralyzed by fear.

    I truly believe the following statement in the book and it is the reason why I do and will continue to nurture my relationship with God:
    A personal relationship with God sets us free to be all we were created to be.
    With God all things are possible.

    These are very important messages that I hold very close to my heart as I start on my Master’s Degree while continuing my important roles as a Wife, Mother of 3, and work full-time as HR Director.

    I know that God is calling me to further my education and that he will be with me each step of the way!!!

  37. I am so much more like Sam than I EVER thought. I have been so frustrated in relationships with others (and even now in my marriage) because I feel like it’s all about what I can do for them…not about knowing ME. And like the poem states – to be known is to be loved and to be loved is to be known…I’ve been hurting for so long because I feel like I’ve never been loved because I’ve never been known. I’ve allowed this hurt to turn to anger & anger into bitterness. I don’t want to be bitter or angry or hurt. And I SEE where God knows me & loves me, but sometimes it seems beyond reach. And sometimes wouldn’t it be nice to be known/loved by someone with skin? Maybe I’ve been searching in the wrong place – maybe His love will meet all my needs…that’s what I’m told anyway, but how on Earth do I get there?? It seems like Sam came to it so easily after meeting Jesus…I want that – am I over thinking this??

    • Anna…
      His love will meet all your needs for sure. I love what Renee wrote in chapter 2: “Christianity is the only faith that offers a relationship with God. We don’t just know about God; our God wants us to know Him. We were created for that kind of relationship.”

      You asked how on earth do you get there and it is relationship. Seeking Him with all your heart, mind and soul. Keep reading “A Confident Heart” and ask God to show you what it is He has for you in this book. The book won’t change you, but the God behind the book will…if you let Him.

      Praying for you! 🙂

    • I feel the same as you..I didn’t realize I was so much like Sam. Although I believe God allows us to go through many things to lead us to where He wants us to be, sometimes it’s difficult dealing with the pain that goes with it. I’m so glad God meets us where we are because sometimes it’s hard to find our way to Him.

  38. I want someone to look at my face
    And not just see two eyes, a nose,
    a mouth and two ears
    But to see all that I am, and could be
    all my hopes, loves and fears

    But that’s too much to hope for, to wish for,
    or pray for
    So I don’t, not anymore

    Now I keep to myself
    And by that I mean the pain that keeps me in my own private jail
    The pain that’s brought me here at midday to
    this well

  39. I was struck by Renee’s story. I too have always felt that I’m not worth staying for. My parents divorced when I was younger, causing my dad to leave our house. While my dad was physically still in my life, emotionally I felt abandoned. In my early twenties, I went around to different guys, trying to get them to fill the emptiness I felt. In every relationship, I would sub-consciously ask if I was worth staying around for. It never worked. I left heartbroken more times than I can count. Renee said, “On the outside everything looked “fine”, yet on the inside I was haunted by thoughts of never being good enough. I felt like I could never do enough to measure up.”

    While I can’t say I’m fully there yet, I feel like God has healed so many parts of my heart. I don’t only that He NEVER leaves us, I feel like I’ve internalized that. He knows us and loves us the same. While I still find myself trying to gain my identity in my work or through my relationships, I just hope that God can continue to help me feel more confident in Him and who he has made me to be.

    ‘To be known is to be loved and to be loved is to be known.”

    I’m not sure about you ladies, but since I’ve started this book, I’ve felt like past insecurities have come to the surface. I find myself doubting big decisions I’ve recently made and worrying more and more what people think of me. Maybe this is God’s way of bringing things to the surface in order to heal them. What do you think?

    • I think two things are going on. God wants to bring complete wholeness and healing – and the enemy wants to intimidate you and convince you it’s not worth it – and bring to mind everything so that you’ll turn back. I pray you won’t do it. You will claim all of the truths over each and every thought and live in the security of HIS promises in each decision and detail. You were made for more than doubt and uncertainty – you were made for lasting confidence and peace. Just seek HIM with all your heart and ask HIM to make your paths straight and to lead you and then keep listening TO HIM and not to the whispers of doubts and fear.

      I had to learn these truths while I wrote the book b/c my own past junk and hurts surfaced but with each one I invited God to enter into that moment with me and bring healing and over time He did. I’m so thankful I persevered and didn’t throw away my confidence the many, many times the enemy tried to convince me I should,

      Praying for you right now Hannah. :0)

      • Renee! Thanks so much for this post, it means a lot to me. Last night I put up a few of God’s promises on the wall of my house to remind me where my confidence comes from. Reading those promises over and over again, even when you don’t feel it, makes a big difference. Thanks for praying for me!

  40. What an awesome video “Known & Loved” I really enjoyed the way John 4 was put into this video and depicting the Samaritan woman meeting up with Jesus. These are the parts that stood out for me:

    You whisper as I pass by and cast judgmental glances
    Though you don’t really take the time to look at me
    Or even get to know me

    You whisper and tell me to my face
    what all those glances have been about and
    You take the time to really look at me
    But don’t need to get to know me
    For to be known is to be loved and
    To be loved is to be known

    And you know me
    You actually know me
    all of me and everything about me
    Every thought inside and hair on top of my head
    Every hurt stored up, every hope, every dread

    My past and my future, all I am and coulb be
    you tell me everything,
    you tell me about ME

    Chapter 2 was reaching out to me- letting me know no matter what my faults or wrong doings that HE loves me and wants to have a personal relationship with me, and this chapter is teaching me to open up to Jesus. My favorite part of Chapter 2 is this:

    He invites you to come to Him to receive the perfect love He offers–love that casts out fear, love that is patient and kind, love that keeps no record of wrongs.

    You and I are not worthy of His love and we can never do anything to deserve it–but we are worth His love because He chose to give it to us. We are His! Hold on to this promise and live in the power of its truth: because God’s love is perfect, you don’t have to be!

    Thank you Jesus that you are al oving & forgiving God-help me to continue to draw nearer to you Lord. Amen

    Aloha from Hawaii oxoxoxox

  41. It is sovery comforting to me to know that Jesus knows us so intimately. I think of all the things and feelings that we hide because we don’t have confidence or we don’t trust others with our vulnerabilities. But to know that at the end of the day, God sees it all, raw and unclothed and we have nothing to fear. What a gracious God we have.

  42. “And YOU know me
    You actually know me
    all of me and everything about me
    Every thought inside and hair on top of my head
    Every hurt stored up, every hope, every dread
    My past and my future, all I am and could be
    You tell me everything,
    You tell me about ME”

    Wow. The words above are what resonate the most with me from the video. As someone who is private with “built-up walls,” I find comfort in knowing that God already knows me. The real me…no pretending. I don’t have to say anything and he knows…he gets me even when I feel as though no one else does. You know how when a squirrel darts out in front of your car and dodges from side to side in the road, not knowing which way to go? (or maybe only southerners will know what I’m talking about?) Well, that’s how I feel about my future sometimes….unsure of which “future-making” decision to make because I want to make the right one before getting run over! Bad example? Well, God already has it planned out. He’s got everything under control….”He’s got this” and I’m OK with that!

    As far as chapter 2, well, feels like the whole chapter was written just for me. “The weight of the water-filled jar in the heat must have been almost unbearable, but the weight of her neighbors’ words, reminding her of her failures and imperfections, was more than she could take.” I know how it feels to “take the long way around” to try to avoid the judgement of others. Also, “We can offer nothing but our presence, and He will desire us just the same.” I serve an AMAZING God! I don’t deserve His love, but He gives it anyway. God thinks I’m good enough for Him?! God desires me, a simple sinner?! How’d I get so lucky to be worthy enough for the King of Kings?! I’m always comparing myself to others: I’m not good enough, not pretty enough, not smart enough, I’ve already made too many mistakes in life, or someone else can do it better so I find comfort in these words and will find myself repeating them often: “…because God’s love is perfect, you don’t have to be!”

    • Jessica! Your post captures my feelings exactly!
      “…unsure of which “future-making” decision to make because I want to make the right one before getting run over! Bad example? Well, God already has it planned out. He’s got everything under control….”He’s got this” and I’m OK with that!”
      I too struggle with making decisions, always afraid of making another mistake, or of getting ahead of God…
      Yet, He orders my steps! I must abandon my quest for perfection…to look perfect, to behave perfectly, to be perfect at work, the perfect daughter, etc. it’s not gobba happen. And, it’s okay, because I have a perfect God covering me.
      Whew! Amen!!!

  43. For to be known is to be loved and
    To be loved is to be known

    And you know me
    You actually know me
    all of me and everything about me
    Every thought inside and hair on top of my head
    Every hurt stored up, every hope, every dread

    My past and my future, all I am and could be
    You tell me everything,
    you tell me about
    me.
    I am so happy that Christ looked beyond my fault and saw my need. i have done nothing good to deserve His love,but He love me with an everlasting Love.

  44. I love the word “Yada”! I read “The Yada Yada Prayer Group” years ago & it was & still is one of my very favorites! In fact I have an email that start letsyada & my women of faith group is “let’s yada gurls”! I love that it means to know or be known. My thoughts were let’s talk gurls & get to know God. So cool! I am realizing everyday that I still have a long way to go in “knowing” who God really is. You cannot even believe how appropriate this is for me right now!Thank you!

  45. Wow! What an impact in my heart! God is so speaking to me through this study!!! To be knonw! To someone with childhood hurts that God has been healing and opening doors for sharing his healing…we do want to be known and yet loved!

    Jeremiah 1:5 !”before you were born I set you apart” God has been asking for more, and I say “yes Lord, yes!”

    Thanks so very much for this study, God is speaking to me through it.

  46. The video is powerful. I can’t believe that I can relate to the Samaritan woman at the well. After reading chapter 2 this is what really stood out for me. That Jesus is waiting for me at the well ready to offer his perfect love to me while I’m in the midst of my imperfect life that is filled self doubt and insecurities. Hallelujah what a savior. Renee thank you for your book and this study.

  47. I love how God loves me, in spite of me. I believe in our walk with God, that we will notice that sometimes we are our own worst enemy. But to know that God loves us just for who we are. No front, no pretending, no acting, just being upfront and honest and sincere with the things we struggle with and things we don’t like about ourselves. No love compares.

    I see how everyone from the youngest to oldest just want to be loved… we just want to be wanted. We want to be known, but still loved. It’s hard to let others see and know all the baggage that we carry (ourselves). We don’t want people to get too close to those touchy things or feelings of insecurity. The only one I’ve found that I’m more comfortable with at being myself is Jesus. The things I used to get made fun of in highschool for my appearance (things I can’t change about myself) would leave me walking around the halls with my head to the ground. Afraid if I lifted up my head somebody would see that imperfection that only God knows how uncomfortable and embarrassing it is to me. But when I’m with God, I can truly be myself. I can lift my head up to Him and praise Him for loving me for me. Not based on my apperance, but just for who I am. He loves me. No love have I found that’s any greater. Only God can I open up to and let him see and heal those feelings of hurt and embarassment. I sit and cry as I’m typing this right now, because God is through this study right now revealing to me something about myself. Something about my heart, that he needs to repair is those seeds of embarassment and hurt that others have planted in my heart. He needs to heal this place in my heart, so I can be set free of feeling that way anymore. He came so I could live life, and live it more abundantly. Please pray that God would heal those (deep, hurtful parts) in my heart, and replace those seeds with seeds of love. Love is what heals our hearts. I know God will take care of me.

  48. Wow…it was amazing and a great reminder that He wants to know us at a level that is far deeper than I have ever wanted to go with anyone except my husband!

  49. It was not my dad, but my mom who left me with the baggage of ‘if I don’t behave well enough she’ll leave’. Unfortunately she would leave, for a time when her anger got the better of her. But because I was under two years old, I interpreted it as my bad behavior drove her off and it was only when my older brother, older sister, and I started behaving well again, that she came back. What she did was exactly what she needed to do to stop the cycle of abuse with which she grew up, but in my less than 2 year old mind, I interpreted it much differently. It is something that I have fought for years, ever since God helped me to realize it.

    Reading your words about your dad leaving you and describing what I have felt all these years was like a breath of fresh air for me. I am learning much from your insights and perspective. Even though I am 53 years old, have been a Christian for 43 of those years, hold a Master’s of Divinity degree and am an ordained minister, you are still teaching me much that I need to know and I thank God for allowing me to be a part of this study at this time.

  50. She had some very interesting things in her poem. I basically got that another individual can’t judge another person by their appearance, color, decreed, race, or gender. However, all this done by God not man also, another individual shouldn’t be to quick to judge some one else cause he or she could be judging God’s chosen one.

    Be Blessed

    Tricia