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We’re going to read chapter 1 and 2 this week, so today I wanted to lead those of you who are ready to go with me to the next chapter.
From Chapter 2, A Confident Heart
“Jesus knew Sam’s (the Samaritan woman’s) story and He knows yours. The Greek word for “know” is yada. It means a deep emotional experience; a bonding between two people when one truly feels the emotions of the other. Jesus knows your pain, fears, doubts, and disappointments. He understands your dreams and desires.
Although some of us feel uncomfortable that God knows so much about us, it is good to be known, to be listened to and not judged. Jesus is the only One who can meet our deepest needs to be accepted and delighted in simply because of who we are. We can offer nothing but our presence, and He will desire us just the same…”
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Our word this week is “Known”
Our verse of the week is Jeremiah 1:5 – “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart…” (NIV)
This week’s video message is below. Please click the arrow to watch it – all the way through. You’ll be so glad you did.
(from video script)
I WANT TO BE KNOWN
I want someone to look at my face
And not just see two eyes, a nose,
a mouth and two ears
But to see all that I am, and could be
all my hopes, loves and fears…
And YOU know me
You actually know me
all of me and everything about me
Every thought inside and hair on top of my head
Every hurt stored up, every hope, every dread
My past and my future, all I am and could be
You tell me everything,
You tell me about ME
And that which is spoken by another would bring hate and condemnation
Coming from Youu brings love, grace, mercy, hope and salvation
I’ve heard of One to come
who could save a wretch like me
And here in my presence, You say
I AM HE…
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Today’s Assignment:
- Download Free Printable PDF of this week’s word and verse — or find it here in a Word doc format. Please print it and post it everywhere so you can remember God KNOWs YOU and He loves you!!
- Read this week’s memory verse (Jeremiah 1:5). Ask God to remind you all week that He knows the way you long to be known, pursued and loved!
- Start or continue reading chapter 2. If you already did or you are just starting, read it slowly and highlight or underline sentences that resonate in your heart. Journal your thoughts if you want the lessons to stay with you.
Connect in Community:
What about today’s video or sentences in Chapter 2 resonate most with you?
- Please click “Share Your Thoughts” below this post and do just that. (REMEMER: If you are reading this via email, you will need to click here to go to my blog to watch the video and share in the comments section.)
- Optional: If you are on Facebook and/or Twitter, I’d love for you to share your favorite quotes on our Confident Heart Community Facebook Page and/or share them with me on Twitter (@reneesswope) I’d love to retweet them! Also let’s use #AConfidentHeart as our hashtag. 🙂
Several things in chapter 2 jumped out at me – not being good enough, unable to win other’s approval, being too serious or sensitive – all things that caused me to shut down a long time ago! I’ve known The Lord for over 20 years and I can sincerely say that He works on us as we are able to deal with the issues we have hidden. I love the statement “the only way we’ll have a confident heart is if we move beyond knowing about God to knowing Him and relying on Him – to depending on His Word with our whole heart, mind and soul”. This is so very true! The study I am attending thru church is called “Knowing God” based on the book by the same title by JL Packer – and it is very good! I would suggest it to anyone who wants to know The Lord better.
I realize I’m a little late responding to this chapter, but I did want to journal my notes on here. On p. 32, Renee says, “Pretending leads to hiding and isolation. What we need is someone who will pursue us and accept us even though we’re flawed. Yet most of us doubt anyone would ever stick with us if we let them get too close. So we put up walls and hide our struggles, even from God, hoping we’ll convince Him and everyone else that we’re fine. Eventually, though, we find ourselves in the shadows of doubt, convinced that we aren’t worth knowing or pursuing. Slowly we begin to believe we have to be perfect to be loved and accepted. We know we never will be-but we’ll die trying, won’t we?”
When I read these paragraphs, I felt like this was written especially for me. I do struggle with this. As a 24-year-old woman who is not in a relationship, often I tell myself that no one will ever want to pursue me and give any number of reasons why they wouldn’t or shouldn’t. I know I will never be perfect, but I think sometimes I assume others are perfect–even though I know they aren’t either. I get in a good spot and then doubt and insecurity overwhelms my mind and heart and then I start believing that I will never be able to have a relationship with a good, Christian guy. I’m not one who is in relationships all the time — I think that is part of my building walls up that Renee speaks about. I always feel I’m not good enough and never will be, but I do pretend that I’m fine. Outwardly I think people would think I have it all together, but inwardly I have a desire to be in a committed relationship where the other accepts my flaws. I just doubt that anyone would want that though. Thanks for allowing me to share my struggles with you all 🙂
wow!!! I loved the video it made me cry! I myself am having extreme marriage difficulties and problems with my children. I also have a heart filled with insecurities and struggles… I want to be known! There have only been a handful of people who have taken the time to see that I am not fine. I need prayer for my marriage because I have known God all my life but not until recently become a follower. My husband dedicated his life when younger but has totally fallen away and doesnt see the need for God. Most days I dont feel strong enough to stay because my husband is not nice and not affectionate. I dont feel good enough and never have.
The video made me want to cry – it was so powerful! It pulled at every heart string in my body and it took everything in me to not cry. I immediately shared it with a few women and men. I have always been moved by the “woman the well” scripture and how Jesus “read her mail” and blessed her life tremendously; radically changed her life. I am currently going through so much in my life right now and I am struggling with peace and the steadiness in my faith that I have had in my life. My world is being rocked and because of that I feel so alone, even though I am surrounded by loving and caring friends. In my world of loneliness, I feel like the woman at the well….so this video spoke so deeply to me. As sad as it made me feel, it also gave me hope. Thank you so much for sharing Renee!!!
The video was very powerful! I’ve watched it twice already and I’m sure I will watch it again.
There were several parts of Chapter 2 that tugged at my spirit. The part where you talk about Him inviting us to slow down and talk to him about our day, our desires and our doubts. I want this kind of relationship with him, and I am definitely trying, but it doesn’t feel natural yet and I feel like it should. In my childhood, my Nana conjured up fearful images of God, which turned me away from Christianity in my teen years. It was only in my adult years that I turned back toward God and have been slowly building a relationship since. Too often, I look for the approval of others and it is true that I never seem to get enough. I need to stop filling up my heart with doubts and turn it fully to the One who knows my worth.
Its nice to know that I am not alone in these struggles with my feelings. I love my walk and time with the Lord, more than anything else. Still I sometimes have doubts that I am not doing enough and then I am reminded that it is not by our works but by the grace of god that we are able to do all things.
When I accepted Christ, I was about 12 or so, having spent my younger years in church and Sunday school almost every single week. When my heart began to stir, I thought that the moment I accepted Christ into my heart, there would be a BIG SOMETHING: a huge trembling, a vision, internal fireworks…something wonderful. But nothing remotely like that happened. I was crushed, really. I had heard lots about others having such experiences, but I did not. So I gave myself several times, in case He was busy with others at the time! Nothing. You reminded me, Renee, that this act is a decision. At 12, I didn’t have maturity and knowledge to understand. I know now that I was saved the first time! Multiple petitions are unnecessary. We are to go on from there and grow to know and understand the Holy Spirit and recognize His caring and leadership.
Fifty years later, I am still learning about and loving about our amazing Three in One! God is so GOOD!
-My humiliation turned into frustration (that is sooo me!)
-From a distance, i look like I’m doing just fine.
-We fear that if people know we doubt ourselves, they’ll start doubting us too. (I was so wrapped up in people pleasing and putting my confidence in what others thought of me that I was always putting on the “I’m fine” front. Since i read chapter one daily i am reminding myself who is my Confidence)
-He is there waiting for us when we’re going through the motions, aware of what needs to be done but unaware of how we’re going to do it. (This is what i needed to hear, i started this study bc even though i was reading the bible nightly it felt like a motion. I felt empty on the inside. I felt this study could help me, and now i know in my heart that this study will help me.)
My favorite sentence/promise: Nothing could keep Him from wanting to be with you.
I appreciate the Samaritan woman being called Sam. I could definitely relate to her heart issues being touched and her desire to change the subject! This was Jesus though, not a friend or family member being there for her.
Everything related to the window seals and columns afar and up close is me. I’ve tried to open up but it only ended in hurt, betrayal, rejection. Now it’s easier not to take the risk, yet it hurts because it’s not that I don’t want to. How can I? That’s why I want to get closer to God. He’s the only one that “truly” seems to love me and care. I have to go closer! I need him!
Page 25 (3rd paragraph): One way God tells us that confidence will come is when we ask Him for what is already part of His will. 1 John 5:14 – I want to know His will because I must have been wrong before about many things, is my thought right now. A lot of questions/concerns in this juncture of life.
when you asked us to go back to our childhood and think about what we thought about God I had a hard time. I know we went to church when i was a kid.. for a time… I remember wanting to be at worship so i walked to church by myself.. that is the last time I remember thinking anything about or desiring anything of God. until I was in my mid 20’s. So until then I guess there is a distance thing. And I still struggle with that at times. Right now more than ever. Jesus is my Lord and Savior I know he is here… and there….
I am amazed. Chapter 2 was very significant to me and I really enjoyed getting new insight into Sam’s story. I have always known this story (the woman at the well) but never considered the significance of her viewpoint. The portion of Chapter 2 “More than Knowing” was the most significant for me. “we are worth His love because He chose to give it to us.” I am so glad I joined this study at this time in my life. I have just this year found a church home that is not just concerned with numbers but also showing believers in Christ how to have a relationship with Christ. I have started reading my bible daily and am beginning to see how the only thing standing between me and a close relationship with my Lord is ME.
I waited to watch the video until today because I wanted to finish the chapter first and then I didn’t have a chance to go back to it. I watched it twice. I felt the power in her words the first time and decided to share it with my fiance. The second time I found my eyes filling with tears just from the words touching deep places in my heart. Thank you so much for writing this book, having this study and posting the most powerful spoken video I have experienced to date!
Your words about attending church for years and not understanding that God wants a relationship with me. I only discovered that truth a few years ago and how freeing it has felt. I have a relationship with Him. Alleluia!
I finished reading this chapter having an argument with my husband. I have spent the last few days letting my doubts and insecurities take a hold of me, and in the meanwhile I pushed him and God away. I knew I needed a Bible study…but I did not realize how vitally I needed it until just today. As I was reading this chapter and answering the questions, I just cried and cried because I am letting my doubts keep me from a complete relationship with Christ and a more loving marriage with my husband. A few hours ago, I felt hopeless, sad, and hurt. Now I feel hopeful and forgiving because of God’s love and forgiveness.
I have been a Christian most of my life, but I think I’ve always felt unworthy of God’s love. I often feel like I’m not a good enough Christian, and I compare myself to other women who seem like they have it all together. I’m realizing now that even they have their doubts, and I shouldn’t compare myself because God loves me and knows me. Thank you so much for this study, Renee. I’m feeling very blessed to be a part of it with so many others right now.
Wow Heather!…I could have not said it better myself! I had a similar episode today with my husband. I was feeling positive and more confident up until then,but immediately after that I felt defeated and doubtful.
I reflected back I what I read in chapter 2, (p. 43) “the only way we’ll have a confident heart is if we move beyond knowing about God to knowing and relying on Him…” I was sad and upset for a period of time today, but once I “opened the door” again, He was still there waiting to listen and to continually accept me and love me no matter what. This book is giving me such an amazing and new way to look at everyday life and life’s experiences.
Thanks Beverly! It really is amazing the difference it can make in a day to simply just remember that God loves you!
… so we put up walls and hide our struggles, even from God…
In my mind, I tend to put unpleasant experiences and emotions in a chest, lock it up and shove it into the darkness. Out of sight and out of mind. I hold the key, I have had the control. Yet, now I no longer want to do that anymore. Hiding from God is not what I want. I want to experience His healing, His love. Mentally, emotionally I have chosen a “chest” to open and I want to keep it open. No more locks, no more closing it and not dealing with it’s contents. Someway, somehow He will heal me, bring me peace concerning what is inside… feelings of sorrow, regret, fear, and longing over the death of my daughter. It is one of the heaviest and biggest chests in my heart and mind.
… if we only live on the surface with God, we’ll never experience the intimacy we long for or the acceptance and security He offers.
I understand that that I need to go below the surface and bring things to the surface and talk with Him about them. Bringing things out of the dark, giving them to God and shining God’s light on them…praising Him for the His goodness and giving thanks for the blessings that came as a result of the experience is my desire.
…He invites you to come to Him to receive the perfect love He offers-love that casts out fear, love that is patient and kind, love that keeps no record of wrongs (love that will not condemn or criticize me).
I believe His words, that He loves me perfectly.
…He can show us places in our hearts that need His repair…
I am ready for God’s light and love to shine on the broken pieces of my heart. I am ready to bring them out of the darkness of my heart and mind and to share them with Him.
I love the point that Jesus pursued the woman at the well, that it was His mission. That He wants to be there for me in every part of my day and life is so beautiful.
The video made me cry! Both the video, Renee’s personification of “Sam” and the way that this age old story is presented in the book WOKE ME UP. I’m a Christian, so I often skimmed over the story unless teaching Sunday school to the 4th-5th graders. I thought it didn’t apply to me. I wasn’t a harlot, I was SAVED, I was happily married, I GOT IT….nope….it was me. I too, wanted to be seen for ME, the inside me, and still be loved and embraced and accepted. I wanted to admit my imperfections, all 2000+ of them and not be ostracized. My last church focused SO MUCH on being the literal P31 and Titus 2 woman….I KNEW I couldn’t come close to measuring up, so I deemed myself a failure then. But then I got some hope and encouragement, the wrong kind, and was determined to make myself that woman….I only made myself sick. A sick that is chronic, an auto-immune sick. I’m not finished with Ch 2 yet, but I can’t pick a passage so far…it ALL is so relevant!
There are several things I took away from this chapter. First the concept of ‘not being fine’. I’ve heard the phrase ‘fake it till you make it’, meaning say your fine even if you aren’t because eventually you’ll believe you are. I’m not good at saying things I don’t believe in. In addition, I’m not so sure everyone that asks how you are really wants to hear anything more than you are fine. However, it is nice to have a few people that you could be honest with and explain your thoughts and they wouldn’t judge you when you are not fine.
The analogy of being fine from a distance, but not up close (ie. house needs paint) is another interesting concept I took from this chapter. I can understand Renee’s initial reaction of defensiveness. Yet it was interesting to hear how after some thought, she was grateful that someone told her of the need to repair her home even though it seemed fine from a distance.
The last piece that I relate to the most is Sam’s relationships. I have never been married, never even proposed to. However, I want to be in a relationship, but I must be doing something wrong. I’ve had an 4 year relationship, 8 year relationship and most recently a year long relationship. I hate to admit I do somewhat look to the man to make me happy, when I know I shouldn’t. With wanting to be in a relationship so bad and wanted to make things work, I’ve allowed men to treat me inappropriately, which saddens me. I need confidence in this area of my life.
This video was absolutely amazing. I love how she reinforced that even though we are unclean and sinners God still knows everything about us which in turn means that he loves us.
Jeremiah 1:5 has spoken so much to me this week. I grieved as a friend welcomed into this world her baby girl & just a few days later said goodbye to her precious baby girl as she was welcomed into Heaven by Jesus. Through this verse I was reminded that God knew Baby Kate while she was being formed in her Mother’s womb. He knew what her few short days on this earth would be like & he knew how He was going to use the pain to touch the lives of everyone who came in contact with her. The strength God gave her parents to make it through the difficult days ministered to more people than they could ever imagine.
I am reminded that if God used Baby Kate in just a few short days to minister to others, how much more can He use me if I live in His Confidence and follow His plan for my life.
This chapter really touched my heart. For so many years I felt like Sam. Praise God that through His forgiving grace and mercy He chose me to be a child of His. I have been on a journey with Him for the last 6 years. My biggest challenge the last two years has been truly deriving my joy from the Lord. Not from my husband, my job, my dogs, my Pinterest dreams. Circumstances in life toss and turn like waves, I have been striving to stay grounded in Him through every event. Its not easy though and somethimes I feel like I am praying to the ceiling and the prayers fall back to the ground. I KNOW this is not truth, but man those feelings can be deceiving. On Easter my husband and I grew tired of feeling like we have been running on “auto-pilot” and re-dedicated our lives and marriage to God. I am praying for a spiritual renewal, a relational awakening for each of us! I am so thankful to be a part of this journey with each of you.
Laura S- as I was watching the video, I too was touched, I had chills. My husband was sitting beside me and as he heard it, it drew him in as well. He stopped what he was doing to watch the video. It really is powerful.
I am a few days behind in the study but I just watched the Known video and it took my breath away. My husband actually stopped what he was doing and watched it, too. I am looking forward to reading the chapter now!
oh those doubts, am I good enough and am I enough….I have always struggled with them, and with failure. I have always been a people pleaser, and a hider of my emotions. I am slowly learning to turn it all to God and go with it. for what I have read int eh book it hasn’t yet talked much about words, but man alive I am seeing things with words and our choices. this is eye opening to me that people like you rene, feel how I feel. I am a housewife, with three kids diagnosed bipolar, and I struggle hourly with things. when the thoughts get me its hard to stop. your book is really helping me change this and work my life for the better thanks so much!!! I am looking forward to the studies where I left off in the book before this started. but going over the beginning again as been great to just slow down and really let it sink in.
reading all the responses and how this book is touching so many hearts is overwhelming, and I get overwhelmed in a good way reading this book sometimes. your words were put together in an amazing way. im getting new things out of these chapters I didn’t get the first time. this is much better with other people!!
I have struggled, like Sam, with men–thinking men can fill that empty place that belongs only to God….and it has been difficult getting my heart to believe that God really Loves ME and Cares about ME, just the way I am, what a relief and blessing!!! I am Okay….
The To be Known video is awesome….I know I have felt like that many, many times…and, wow, I always thought it was “THE MAN” in my life and yes, it is, but I was picking the wrong one—IT HAS BEEN GOD ALL ALONG…..Thank you, Father!!!!!!
I thank God for the revelation that He is not my earthly father. My earthly father was not around. He just called to check in and make sure I was obeying Mom and following the rules. And he wanted to chastise if he felt it was needed. I always, until recently, felt God was this bigger than life, a distant figure, who checked in periodically to make sure that you were following the rules, and chastise when necessary if He felt you werent. It is a process realizing our Father is a loving friend, caretaker, and confident. I pray daily that I move this image from my head to my heart. I know that He is more than my earthly father could ever imagine to be, now I must feel it in my heart. My mother raised her six girls to never become dependant on a man- that was weakness. So not having a close relationship with my father or any other man, I see now that I transferred this ideology to God. To depend on God- I was weak. Now I realize He grows stronger in my weakness and what a precious relief it is to not always have to “hold it together- no matter what”. I am scared, although excited, about what God is going to reveal to me during this study. Pray for me as I pray for you.
Praise God!! I love how you admitted that you constantly judge others, lie, and procrastinate; I think that confessing those kinds of truths about ourselves are the kinds of humble acts that can change a life! God bless you in this new unmasked journey!!!
God bless you and thank you for your encouragement! It is a hard thing to do but this second chapter has revealed much!! Bless you as we take this journey together!!
Man, this chapter had me in tears!! I thought I was the only one who was imperfect! I thought I was supposed to be together an so I held that secret within me. Don’t get me wrong, I said many of my mistakes but not all. Not the insecurities that I struggle with in how I look and how I feel. Not the fact that my house seems to never get clean or that I don’t work and am a single mom. Not the fact that I am 42 with 3 kids, grown and teen yet no car, no job and sometimes no hope. Tonight, or Gould I say this morning, I wrote a letter to my mom, dad, brother and his wife. I ha to be free of the condescending chains of what I did in the past and even though I didn’t want to write it, He led me through it. I still wonder sometimes why did He pick a screw up like me. Someone who constantly judges others, lies to her mom so as not to hear the complaining, procrastinates more than nought and fights him tooth and nail to show the real me when I just want this “Im fine” mask to stay on. I don’t understand it but I am so grateful. The hardest thing I could ever say is I am imperfect and mean it and have others read it. I’m not fine and that’s okay.
This chapter helped me to remember all about the fear, shame and even suicidal thoughts that I had less than ten years ago. I based my worth on performance, attention I could get from others and an image I could present to others while hiding the truth. I was fairies and fearful of rejection, loneliness and what others thought of my choices. I chose to ignore God’s voice and listened to others. Fortunately, I got desperate enough to reach out for help. I found similar stories, learned new tools and began connecting and having authentic relationships with others and God. We are made to connect with each other. The only way we can do this is through safe, loving and non judgments relationships with others, ourselves and God. We are more alike than different.
Renee, I want to say thank you that you have been obedient in God’s calling for your life and that through that obedience it has led to the writing of this overwhelmingly encouraging book. I have heard and read the story of the Samaritan woman several times, but never thought of how much I related to Sam in my life before coming to faith and repentance in Christ nor did I recognize the depth of Christ’s love that He demonstrated to her or has for myself. It is so encouraging and comforting to think about how unconditionally Christ loves me and how he has purposed in pursuing a personal and intimate relationship with me. He knows my deepest and darkest sins, but still pleads His perfect righteousness and blood for me to the Father to cover all of my transgressions. One lesson has stuck in my mind through reading the first two chapters of your book and that is that I have believed upon Christ as my Lord and trust in his sufficiency as the perfect and sinless Savior, but I still struggle with living like His promises are true for my life. Please pray that the Lord will remove all the shadows of doubts from my mind and heart and grant me a relationship in which I fully depend and trust in all the truths and promises He has revealed to us through His holy word.
In the richness of His grace,
Deana
Todays been a hard day. Im 35 and I have struggled with guilt trips and hurt from the same source for a long time. I try to move past it, lay it at the alter, pray for the source, forgive not for them but for me, yet the words and hurt, nothing physical or dangerous (just in case someone reads this) but emotional hurt. And I continue to let myself continue in this same cycle over and over again thinking the next phone call will be different, yet it remains the same. The rejection is so deep and bleeds out into all my relationships including into my marriage to a wonderful Godly man who is patient and kind. I say this time will be different and that I’ll be “stronger” I wont seek the approval or want it anymore, but then I am and I feel rejected, hurt, all over again. I know this is not necessarily on topic of chapter two, but I feel this is a safe place. I told my husband and cried, then I was exhausted, and felt the Lord prompting me to read the rest of chapter 2 that I began last night. I identified in ch. 1 looking for love in the wrong places, in ch. 2 I identified with Sam. I was her, have been her many times I think. Running or avoiding the eyes, the judgements, the belittleing. And the last 2 questions in chapter 2 made me realize something. I prayed asking the Lord to speak to me thorugh His Word as I read through the Scripture of Sam’s story again. I felt through the words Christ spoke to Sam He was tellling me, “If you truly knew who I am, truly realize who I really am, that I can fill you. Fill those hurts, fill those places left empty from rejection. That you continuing to try fill them on your own, through anything, whether from the past of love from places you knew in your heart wouldnt fullfill, or even now, whether through ministry, your son, your husband, but Iwill truly fill, and you will no longer be “thirsty” again.”
In question 7 in what lesson I would take away from this chapter is Christ really KNOWS me, and even though He know, He LOVES me. He really and truly “WANTS” me, even though He knows all I’ve done in my past, my current failures, what’s been done to me, yet He still WANTS me. And He wants me to open up to Him and be transparrent, no pretending. I dont have to seek His approval or acceptance He gives it to my unjudgementally. HE LOVES ME.
He loves us and knows us all! Amazing the number of mistakes we make that He still loves us. Our Mind comprehends before our hearts can truly accept this. I pray that his truth will traced our reality. I hope you will find the safe and loving relationships your heart needs outside of the emotionally abusive one and listen to the Holy Spirit’s promptings on boundary issues as well as your worth. You are precious in His sight.
What I loved about the video was how powerful the words are:
“And YOU know me
You actually know me
all of me and everything about me
Every thought inside and hair on top of my head
Every hurt stored up, every hope, every dread
My past and my future, all I am and could be
You tell me everything,
You tell me about ME”
What I loved from the chapter was how He loves us. How I can relate to being afraid of Him. “Oh how He loves us oh…” a song that is playing in my mind right now. I can feel the Holy Spirit telling me. The Lord speaks to me in so many ways. Through this study, Christian music, and His Word. I can rest tonight well as I finalize this post. I can wait to see the person I become after this study. I am documenting it all in my journal. Until next time all, God bless.
I was reading chapter 2 and realized how much I remembered about it. I also realized that I could of just skipped to the end of the chapter and just done the prayer and questions. However, I realized that by doing this I would only be cheating myself of some great reading material. Not only that I would be cheating God out of my time that is not a healthy relationship between my God and I. It is good to be doing this again with the group and to do the rereading the book. It was great reading material when I was away in treatment. It has been almost a year since I have been out of the hospital and knowint that God has got my back and that I have gained more insight to my God has been a blessing. I wanted so much to just push God out of my life when I had to go into treatment thinking he would forget about me. My friends from church stood by my side those 5 months and kept me up to date with Gods’ word and their prayers. I want to say thanks to Renee for offering this bible study again so that this time I can be here to go through the whole thing with a wonderful group of women. I now have to go and read some more of my bible.Then it is on to chapter 3.
I struggle with feeling insignificant to the point of feeling worthless — I find myself much like Sam did in chapter two that there is a pattern or cycle in my life that I keep falling back into – I can experience something negitive or hurtfull from others and I give so much power to my doubt that it does distort my thoughts and overpowers my emotions – I know better but I can not seem to get beyond repeating all the self doubt and insignificance I feel from a failed marriage, a hard relaionship with my father and the cycle of eating to bring me comfort, or joy or just because that is what I do. There must still be places in my heart that still need His repair. I liked the passage – Jesus is the only One who can meet our deepest needs to be accepted and delighted in simply because of who we are. We can offer nothing but our presence and He will desire us just the same.
The one thing that reasonate with me from this assignment is that I am known by God. No matter what comes up against me, I can stand on God’s word and be in peace because He knows me. As I read the many comments, I want to encourage those who maybe struggling with knowing you are save. This journey is a Faith walk and everytime a negative thought or doubt comes in your mind you have to cast it down according to the Word. Rejoicing in what God is doing in our lives from this study. We are being transformed daily into the person He called us to be. Be blessed!
I just finished Chapter 2 and WOW the emotions being stirred up! I too am a pretender because 1. I don’t want to ‘burden’ people with my problems, 2. or they may no longer want to be around me or 3. my problems aren’t that bad. I’m learning it’s ok to be open with some friends, especially those I am trying to be a witness to. It shows how He helps me with my issues and how I try to trust and depend on Him. I’m praying for Jesus to reveal those places in my heart that need repairs. That God smiles when He sees me, gives me confidence! Question 5 – Has anything ever happened that caused you to distance yourself from God or other people? Yes, infertility.I lost my love for God and faith in Him for several years after our trying to have a baby. I hated to be around women so I “hid”. I eventually got back to church and serving God. I learned that I was trying to gain my identity in being a mother and finally realized my identity is in Christ alone, not in any role that I play on earth. That was so freeing! The enemy still tries to wreck my confidence with motherhood but I’m learning to really go to the Word and believe His promises.
The whole idea of Him pursuing me throws me. The part on p. 38 that talks about us slowing down to talk to Him and go deeper to show why we want what we want really made me think especially then asking if this is what we really NEED! WOW!
I came away after reading and thinking about this with a picture in my head of me climbing into his lap like a Father and child. Resting with Him, sharing with Him and just being in the quiet. I LONG for that! I need that in my life. I need to make time in my life to do this with Him. I wonder how much better I would be in daily life if I would do this. So many areas would be affected. I do have a quiet time currently but this made me think it is surface. It needs to be deeper. Now to make the change…
Amen, Andrea… AMEN!! We get so busy with this fast paced life we forget to Rest with Him and have that quiet time that’s deeper and more meaningful than anything this life can offer. Thank you for your wise words!!! Most definitely I know I needed to hear this!! Thanks
Hello everyone,
I am a bit behind on my reading but am getting back on track. I just started chaper 2 but have to say chapter 1 was very powerful. I did not realize how much my confidence (or lack there of) in myself hindered my reliance on God to take care of me. I always doubt him like I do people and I know in my heart that is not how it should be. I have known God since a child but not like I do now. This Bible study is going to help me grow more as a Christain and get me closer to God. I am very excited and feel blessed to be involved. I am not a slacker or procastinator so I know the enemy is trying very hard to get me off track from this study. Which makes me want to catch up even more.
My biggest lack of confidence is with my children. They both have Asbergers an ADHD and sometimes I wonder if I am doing things right for them. No matter how many times I hear from other that I am, I still feel like I am not doing a good enough job. I am a single mom and feel like I am doing this alone…but I am no alone. God is always there for me. Whether I am doing it right or not.
Blessings!
Hello Rachel, my grandson has adhd and the word asbergers has come up in diagnosis as well. It is not easy, my daughter, a single mother, is attending nursing school and I have stepped up to fill in where she can not. I, too, wonder if I am doing things right with him. I get so frustrated. I will be starting chapter 2 today and am looking forward to it. This school year has been very difficult and we are not sure what the summer will bring. Financially, I need to work but my daughter will be taking summer classes and will need a sitter. We are not sure about daycare because of Sam’s behavior. I have been praying and will add you to my prays.
Sisters in Christ
Kelly
I am behind on this study and have only completed chapter 1. In doing so I have realized just have insecure I truly am. I pray that God will give me the confidence to believe Him and not just in Him. I have always believed in Him but have never truly believed Him. Please pray for me.
As a child, I really didn’t understand who God was other than the stories of how he made Adam and Eve, and created the earth, and rested on the seventh day. I have been in church off and on my entire life and still didn’t get it. I am in a wonderful church now and I now understand that we do not have to be perfect, He loves us no matter what. It took a while for me to accept that, but I have a lot of outside support to reinforce God’s love and blessings. Every day I want to know Him more and more. I want to get as close to God as I possibly can.
Wow…just reading through so many comments here has helped me! I have felt so alone in my struggles through the years. My husband has never understood, even though he has tried many times to help me.
I have one question I would like to ask, and that is this: Why is it that we feel most obligated to answer “fine” in the one place we should feel most free to share our needs and ask for prayer? Church should be a place of compassion, healing, prayer support, love, etc. but I know in my case, it actually is the last place I feel free to ask for help. Maybe because if we are “real” it doesn’t seem spiritual enough? I don’t know…I know I think it’s very sad! Our family has been dealing with some pretty tough stuff over the last three years (hubby with incurable cancer) and it really and truly has seemed to me that people don’t know what to do with me if I’m not strong. It is like they can’t handle the questions…so yes, I long to be part of something that allows me to be myself, even on my bad days, and ask the hard questions without condemnation….but instead, my days of feeling totally inadequate for this task to which God has called me have to be worked through mostly alone…has anyone else experienced what I am talking about?
Thank you, Renee, for this book. It has come at an amazingly perfect time for me. God bless you!
I see now that there is some discussion on this topic after Renee’s next post…the one about removing the mask. That’s what I get for being behind, I guess! Lol!
Shawna,
I do understand… and aren’t you glad you’re not alone and you have found a support system of women who will encourage each other to find that healing we’re all seeking??/ I know I am! Although I go to a beautiful church full of loving beautiful people I, too, feel as if I can not be honest with them. The enemy tries to attack us so we don’t look for that help. I have realized that in this study or maybe I always knew but did not have the strength to admit it. He will make us think they will judge us, make us think it isn’t holy or spiritually correct to ask for help and prayers. He will discourage us from being honest so he can plant a seed of hurt in our hearts and use it against us… I think it’s time to admit and be strong enough to look for those to guide us spiritually into our healing. I know that is what I desire to be honest with Him ALWAYS!!! You are not alone I am with you to support you now in your time of need and so are the rest of these beautiful women!! God Bless you!!!
Can somone help explain to me why Jesus goes straight the issue of the 5 husbands and the man she is living with? I’ve always had a hard time with that. The story just seems to all of a sudden “go there”. Maybe, too fast for me? Maybe I feel uncomfortable for her. I just can’t explain to myseld why he “goes there”? I could see it happen maybe at the end of the story buy it’s like “BAM”.
You ladies are smart people. Share your thoughts with me. I know Renee says that he needed to go “below the surface” and I totally get that, but just need it explained a little more.
Thanks!
Meghan,
The Jews needed a miracle or sign before they would believe. You can read in John 3 that the large crowds who gathered around Jesus saw his miracles and then they believed. Nicodemus said that he knew Jesus was from God – because of his miracles. Jesus said, “It is easy to believe in something you have seen with your eyes ……..”
I hope this helps, Rose Ann
I just want to take this opportunity to thank you for writing this book and sharing it through this online study. When I received the announcement to join, I immediately sent it to some of my Sisters in Christ. Some responded and some didn’t. There are 5 women in our group. I plan to invite them to meet after chapter 5. We will also be communicating periodically through email.
Reading this book is encouraging me to face my doubts honestly and stop saying I’m fine. My personality appears to be very confident, but on the contrary I do sometimes have a spirit of doubt and fear about certain things. I know that doubt and fear does not dwell in the same circle with faith and I must continuously rely on God to gain more confident in my heart. I know that reading the Word of God, puttting my trust in Him, sharing with others who have the same situations, and using your book as a resource will help me meet my goal of facing my doubt.
Yes you are saved. Remember the thief on the cross? Jesus told him that he would be with Him in paradise. That thief was not baptized. Baptism is an act of obedience that signifies the dying of our self and being born again in Him. It is a proclamation of what has already been done. It could be compared to a wedding ring. The wedding ring is not the marriage itself, but a beautiful symbol of it. It is and important and wonderful part of your walk, however, and you should absolutely run back to the church and be baptized just as soon as you can, but not because you have to but because you want to! If you are worried about being judged for being gone for a while, then you should be in good company because I guarantee you that lots and lots of others at the church either have been, are, or will be in the same boat in that respect at some point! Ask anyone and chances are you will discover a church hurt of some type that has either kept them or tempted them to forego church altogether.
Laura,
Thank you for your kindness and beautiful words of truth and encouragement. It’s a great feeling to know that we are not alone in the journey and although the word can have cruel people there are still some with a pure heart full of love not just for themselves but for others!! Thank you so much!!
Jerica 🙂
I am SOO glad that you were encouraged!!! <3
Ladies,
I have a question for you all… Since I have not been yet baptized, but I have given my heart to Jesus and have accepted Him as my ONE & ONLY savior… AM I SAVED??? When I first started going to church I felt such a strong connect with the Lord it was divine… words cannot express the way I felt… AMAZING… My husband who is a none believer and due to circumstances I have allowed myself to stray away from the church, but still manage to read devotional from the women of Proverbs31, I feel like I have lost that connection. I am starting to feel empty again and as much as I try to fill it on my own I feel lost. I’m afraid to go back to church and others judge me for not attending for a long time. Those feelings are preventing me from going back but I long for HIM!! Does He still love me??? Will that AMAZING connection return?? I don’t know where to start and need friendly advice. Thank you all and God Bless…
Jerica 🙂
There are so many times when i question why I dont have a lot of close friendships outside of my marriage and children and this passage reminds me that I don’t need others when I have God who knows all about me and unconditionally accepts me for who I am- no judgement or conditions….
To be known is to be loved and to be loved is to be known..
I know God loves me and I love him! My hurdle has been getting my mind and heart to both get that. I want to see me as God sees me.
I am a friend, mother, wife, youth leader and I work with kids with autism. I mess up, make mistakes and over think things and negatively self internalize at times. I am the oldest and when I grew up there was emphasise on me being the oldest and “knowing better”. I put alot of pressure on myself in wanting to do the “right” things. This video with the help of God giving me some victories lately have I begun to realize I am not the mistakes I make. I am a child of the King and He loves me and “knows” me. I can hold my head up and go confidently into my day no matter what hat Im wearing. I am starting to see me as He does. His child whom He loves despite my mistakes and those mistakes though huge to me are small to him and not impossible for him to forgive. I have found more joy in my life as I have begun this journey of transformation. I am seeing it in my teaching, relationships with others and my job. Not because of myself but because of HIM! I am known and I am loved! By Him and he is the only one that truly matters when its all said and done and everything else is a bonus!
This study has hit me right at home! I had sent a message to a friend that I realized I’ve never really KNOWN Christ and though I call myself a “Christian” there’s really never been any proof of it. I’ve had Jesus trapped on a surface level and refused to let Him REALLY come in and touch the places I guard so well. I’ve run around with my “it’s fine” face on until finally something truly breaks me – I calmly collect myself push the emotion aside proclaim “I’ve got this” and move on….alone. I couldn’t let anyone see the side of me that’s weak. Or the side that doesn’t have it together. What would they think? After all, everyone always says I’m SO STRONG! If they only knew! I’ve walked through the motions, begging for someone to notice I’m a good person, I’m worth being around, worth loving and I have value! But there’s more than what people see… I can be 100% surrounded, and I feel so alone. You can tell me I have worth, but I haven’t believed it. And quite honestly, sometimes I don’t even want to be around myself, so why would people? I do everything “just-so” so that everyone thinks I can do this – I’ve got this….when in reality I DON’T! NOT AT ALL!! People think – “she’s really trying” when in reality I’ve given up and I’m just going through the motions.
Well, that’s changing. The walls I’ve built are coming down. To the point that I’ve physically felt sick since I started this book on Monday. I’m not going to stop, I can’t. It’s the first time I’ve REALLY felt God speaking to me and saying “it’s ok, I won’t ask you to be anything any thing than what I intended, and while you won’t be perfect, you’re created as I wanted you to be – I knew what you’d do before you did it. I knew everything about you before you were even thought of. If it wasn’t what I intended, then I wouldn’t have allowed it. You wouldn’t be here if I hadn’t planned it and I don’t make mistakes. I love you with a perfect love, so you don’t have to be perfect. I know your flaws – the ones you keep deeply hidden – and I still accept you. I know you, and I want you. Just you, as you. If there’s to be change, I can help you through it – we can do it together. Stop worrying what everyone will think, worry what I think, because remember I REALLY KNOW, and I’m still here!” I won’t leave you….will you make the same promise to me??”
So, willingly, but still a bit reluctant, I will keep going, but it’s very scary to me – because I’ve allowed myself to believe He was a mean scary person – when in reality He really is love.
I have a hard time to connect the love that God has for me….I so fall short of it….you all are a blessing!
Patty,
I have felt that connection… that LOVE… and it’s amazing!!!! I have lost that connection and it’s a constant struggle against myself and the negative thoughts the enemy places in the head to again feel that connection… Like yourself I long and need to fell it!!! I will keep you in my prayers and I pray you have the opportunity to fell this unexplainable connection with Him… I also pray it will NEVER go away. God Bless you!!!!!
It is nice to know that someone is out there praying for me. I have realized the reason why the “connection” with God left. I am that Christian who waits until there is a problem/illness before I get serious about developing a relationship with God thru prayer and Bible study. . When the crisis passes, so does the “connection” God and I had. It was me that left – not God. Jesus said, “I will never leave you, nor forsake you.”
I know what I must do. I must allow Jesus to be LORD of my life, instead of the things of this World. This will mean spending more time with Jesus than the TV. This is something I have thought about, but never succeeded to do. Just like Renee said in chapter 2, “The only way we’ll have a confident heart is if we move beyond knowing “about” God to KNOWING and RELYING on Him be depending on His Word with our whole heart, mind, and soul.”
Rose Ann
I just completed Chapter 2. I am amazed at how much God is speaking to me. I have been crying the last hour reflecting on His Words and His thoughts for me. Chapter 2 DEFINITELY spoke to me in the story about Sam. I have lived a similar life, being rejected and feeling alone, running from my own insecurities. It really hit home as the scripture reads “Jesus had to go through Samaria” Why? Because one of His childs was feeling alone and hopeless, and He wanted to be there for her. This tells me that, He knows our life. He knows out next step. BUT, when we hurt or feel helpless, even though we are not worthy, HE IS THERE ALWAYS!!!! How amazing His Love truly is for us. Jesus goes out of His way to show us light in the midst of darkness. I am so Blessed and beyond words that I am chosen to be a part in this Bible Study. I believe I will be revealed from our Lord a Grace-Filled Word of Hope and Love that will continue my journey and walk with My Heavenly Father. Thank You Renee for writing this Book “A Confident Heart”, and I am so excited to what lies ahead, holding strong to God’s hand and letting Him guide me. God Bless your moment in Him while you continue to lead us in God’s Word. Joanne (Jo)
I HAVENT RECIEVED MY BOOK YET, WHILE IM WAITING IS THERE A PLACE I CAN READ CHAPTER 2?
I most related to the portion about pretending. Telling people I am “fine” when deep down I am the opposite. I don’t like to share my thoughts with just anyone and even if I am close to someone, even then sometimes I will bottle it up, again down to feeling like it is not important, insignificant and doubts of why anyone would want to listen. God does care however, he is available anytime, day or night, to listen to what is on our heart – He already knows what is there before we tell him about it! How amazing is that?