_______________________
We’re going to read chapter 1 and 2 this week, so today I wanted to lead those of you who are ready to go with me to the next chapter.
From Chapter 2, A Confident Heart
“Jesus knew Sam’s (the Samaritan woman’s) story and He knows yours. The Greek word for “know” is yada. It means a deep emotional experience; a bonding between two people when one truly feels the emotions of the other. Jesus knows your pain, fears, doubts, and disappointments. He understands your dreams and desires.
Although some of us feel uncomfortable that God knows so much about us, it is good to be known, to be listened to and not judged. Jesus is the only One who can meet our deepest needs to be accepted and delighted in simply because of who we are. We can offer nothing but our presence, and He will desire us just the same…”
_____________________________________
Our word this week is “Known”
Our verse of the week is Jeremiah 1:5 – “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart…” (NIV)
This week’s video message is below. Please click the arrow to watch it – all the way through. You’ll be so glad you did.
(from video script)
I WANT TO BE KNOWN
I want someone to look at my face
And not just see two eyes, a nose,
a mouth and two ears
But to see all that I am, and could be
all my hopes, loves and fears…
And YOU know me
You actually know me
all of me and everything about me
Every thought inside and hair on top of my head
Every hurt stored up, every hope, every dread
My past and my future, all I am and could be
You tell me everything,
You tell me about ME
And that which is spoken by another would bring hate and condemnation
Coming from Youu brings love, grace, mercy, hope and salvation
I’ve heard of One to come
who could save a wretch like me
And here in my presence, You say
I AM HE…
_____________________________________
Today’s Assignment:
- Download Free Printable PDF of this week’s word and verse — or find it here in a Word doc format. Please print it and post it everywhere so you can remember God KNOWs YOU and He loves you!!
- Read this week’s memory verse (Jeremiah 1:5). Ask God to remind you all week that He knows the way you long to be known, pursued and loved!
- Start or continue reading chapter 2. If you already did or you are just starting, read it slowly and highlight or underline sentences that resonate in your heart. Journal your thoughts if you want the lessons to stay with you.
Connect in Community:
What about today’s video or sentences in Chapter 2 resonate most with you?
- Please click “Share Your Thoughts” below this post and do just that. (REMEMER: If you are reading this via email, you will need to click here to go to my blog to watch the video and share in the comments section.)
- Optional: If you are on Facebook and/or Twitter, I’d love for you to share your favorite quotes on our Confident Heart Community Facebook Page and/or share them with me on Twitter (@reneesswope) I’d love to retweet them! Also let’s use #AConfidentHeart as our hashtag. 🙂
Discover more from Renee Swope
Subscribe to get the latest posts sent to your email.
Hello ….
I do not have the book and I’m trying to obtain it …. please advise.
Melanie, I am using the Kindle version. You can get a free Kindle for pc at Amazon.com and then also download free Christian books, including this one. You just read it on your pc, in the Kindle library, and you can highlight and add notes too. 🙂
Melanie, not sure if there is a LifeWay store near you, but they have them on sale for $6.99 which is half off.
I loved this video. It says it all. It grabs your whole being. Can’t wait to start reading chapter 2. In just this short 1-1/2 days I am learning about myself and what needs to change. Can’t wait to say goodbye forever to all my insecurities and doubts.
I grew up with the fact that the only ones that pray and fast is the pastor and that God is the God of do’s and don’ts. Wow, were we ever lead down the wrong path. It is so cool to know that I personally can have a relationship with my Lord and Father. To Ginosko (Greek-to know God intimately and personally) and be accepted, approved of, and loved by God is so totally awesome. I praise Him every day for His unconditional love that has brought me from the bondage of abuse into knowing His freedom from the bondage of that abuse. We do serve an awesome God!
I praise Him too that you have been set free!! So glad you are on this journey with us this week. He knows you and He loves you Lisa! In fact, He’s crazy about you!
AMEN and Praise God
Wow this has spoken to me. I walk around where from afar I look together, nice and neat but up close I am a paint peeling, chipping mess…. This study has been such a blessing. And to top it off the “I want to be known” Poem tugged at my heart and is a wonderful tool for those raising young ladies to help them understand that only Jesus’s love can fill them and truly know them. God Bless
I appreciate your response, Kerry. I can, at times, relate to your first few statements. I also appreciate what you said about the poem being a tool for young ladies. 🙂 God bless you richly!
My husband is a preacher mainly in prisons and he continues to say “We are in this together” and we are. God Bless you Cindy.
To be known AND be loved…amazing! Thanking God today that He sent His son to Sam on that blistering afternoon and that He sent His son for me!
I think so too!
Most of my life, my doubt, insecurity and fear was implanted in my mind because of my over-sensitivity to other’s perception of me or my own belief of their perception of me.
To guard my mind and hold each thought captive is so imperative….I in effect have to RE-TRAIN my BRAIN to go back to the Source and rest in the Truth – The truth of GOD’s KNOWLEDGE of me – the One who CREATED ME IN HIS UNFATHOMABLE LOVE. Any other person’s opinion in this world is equivalent to what a warped mirror in a fun-house reflects back.
At that point, I don’t have to prove or disprove anything about myself to anyone….Let them have “fun” figuring it out!
Wow! You have said the proverbial “mouthful” here. 🙂 Thank you. The first paragraph is true of me, too. I am glad you wrote it. Yes! “RE-TRAIN” the brain – to go back to THE SOURCE and rest in THE TRUTH! Absolutely a must. Everything you have written is resonating within. 🙂 Praise God! God bless you richly!
Amen!
AMEN!!!
Thanks, Pillar, I couldn’t have said it better myself.. “a warped mirror in a fun house”!
This is really challenging my mind and heart. I’m ready to go on this journey because I know God has big plans for me! God’s ways are definitely better than our own.
God bless you ladies, today’s reading of ch2 was pretty heart wrenching for me & yet very refreshing. I’ve known about God but I want to know God. That’s one of the many things in this chapter that stood out for me. Because of my need to be accepted & wanted I’ve forgotten that my relationship with God needed to be the most important relationship I have. Nevertheless, because of God’s mercy & forgiveness I’ve come to that realization. I chose my insecurities to take precedence over God’s desire to be up close & personal with me. But it’s a new day & His mercies are made new. And so I’m taking the first step in getting to know Him & my life goes on with this revelation & heartfelt desire to do just that – get to know HIM. There’s no turning back but moving forward in Him & learning whom He desires to be to me.
He’s doing a new thing & I can see it!
My eyes are filled with tears and my heart is filled with joy Deborah as I read your story. Im praying for you friend. You are getting the most important truth we need as we begin this journey. Keep pressing in to HIM into His LOVE, into HIS acceptance and affirmation – it is what you were made for and will change your life forever!!
Deborah & Renee,
I felt the same way as I was readhing Ch. 2. I was surprised to find my eyes were filling with tears. Anyway, I do the “fine” thing because I don’t want to be high maintenance and there aren’t very many people that I can really talk to. I forget that God knows me, knows all about me. I have been a Christian long enough to know that you can’t hide anything from Jesus, but I still find myself trying to put on a “good face” for my quiet times.
Deborah,
Quoting your words…
Because of my need to be accepted & wanted I’ve forgotten that my relationship with God needed to be the most important relationship I have. Nevertheless, because of God’s mercy & forgiveness I’ve come to that realization. I chose my insecurities to take precedence over God’s desire to be up close & personal with me.
You are not alone in this thought process. I’m praying for however many new days it takes to break the spell!
Amen! Amen! Amen! Thank You Lord. A new thing indeed. Hallelujah!
Amen. Thanks for your response Deborah. It encourages me. Having to go back and read over and over: “Because of my need to be accepted & wanted I’ve forgotten that my relationship with God needed to be the most important relationship I have. Nevertheless, because of God’s mercy & forgiveness I’ve come to that realization. I chose my insecurities to take precedence over God’s desire to be up close & personal with me. But it’s a new day & His mercies are made new.”
You ladies are a blessing from God at just the right time in my life. Thank you for sharing and caring and loving with HIS love. Renee, thank you for allowing Him to speak through you!
What hit home for me was “If we only live on the surface with God, we’ll never experience the intimacy we long for or the acceptance and security of others”. I don’t think I truly “lay it on the line” with God- I am guilty of how I feel and think something is wrong with me- my problems are minor compared to most. I can’t get it into my head that He knows me and loves me whether I struggle with depression or guilt myself that I’m not perfect. I struggle with believing completely as you stated in Chapter 2.
Praying for you TEH. Praying for God to give you the courage to lay it on the line. You might as well, He knows your thoughts anyway! No hiding from God …. just freedom! And there are no minor problems. It’s happening to you so that makes it a big deal in the eyes and heart of God. Trust Him with it all!
Blessings,
Donna
I know He loves me and KNOWS me, but I cannot understand how He could truly love me with my past mistakes/sins. How could I do some of the things I have done and even at the time, I knew they were not in keeping with what I knew to be Christ’s teachings and yet I did them. My guilt is what holds me back from the relationship I want so badly with God. I try to remind myself that He loves me and forgives me, but how can He forgive me if I can’t forgive myself….? Sometimes living on the surface seems so easy when what I really desire is to live fully in His love….
Stacey, thanks for sharing your heart. I used to feel like you do and one day a friend shared with me something that changed my life regarding my past and needing to forgive myself. She asked me, “Are you higher than God? Of course my reply was in astonishment – NO – she said, well then “If God can forgive you, who are you not to forgive yourself?” It was like a physical slap in the face to realize that I was acting like I was higher than Him and it broke me. I’m so thankful to have fellowship with other women that can correct me in love. I pray that this will help you. Here is a key verse that helps me to keep my focus on the here and now and looking to the future instead of my past. Paul writes in Philippians 3:13-14 NLT No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us. May the Lord Bless you as you seek him with all your heart.
Thank you Gina, that does give me something to think about as I wrestle with my emotions and trying to let the Word guide me instead of those emotions.
Reading your post brought tears to my eyes and a tug on my heart strings as I know exactly how you feel here. I too have had these doubts and have had the desire to know Jesus fully. I have always kept a part of me just incase something happened and part of it is because I have never know pure love in my life. I have known a love that was conditional and have somehow thought that God’s love is somehow that way too. I am looking forward to finding out truly all I can about God. I was saved and baptized when I was 11….
‘And you know me, you actually know me…to be known is to be loved, and to be loved is to be known…’ To know that He knows everything about me and still He loves me – amazes me everyday!
also reminds me of the c.s. lewis quote: “God, who foresaw your tribulation, has specially armed you to go through it, not without pain but without stain.” i hate that we have to go through trials, but i LOVE that God has known us, all along, and that He has loved us FROM everlasting, TO everlasting. to be known and loved…priceless.
I will be rereading the chapters and posting between today and to morrow. I;m on the way to see my grandson for the first time in 6 years. scared please pray for me
I will pray about this visit with you.
That’s awesome! I’m praying for you!
Praying!!
Angela, praying for you.
i thought of this text a lot as i sat through a few baby blessings this past weekend…this text, along with psalm 139. reminds me of the old song, “He knew me, yet He loved me.”
Love these words. So few yet so powerful…If I could take this in and truly believe it in my heart and soul.( My head gets it.) I don’t feel so alone in my feelings after reading all these thoughts. The struggle with thinking I am not doing this God thing right is so strong some days that I have a “why bother” attitude. So today, April 6th I am changing that belief! I am doing the best I can and the more I pray and get into his word and this study (thank you Renee) the stronger I will become!
this grabed my heart. I know I want all of this every day. Praise God
Oh that we would walk in the Truth that God knows us intimately and loves us deeply – not because of who we are or what we’ve done, but because of Who He IS – the lover of our souls, the only One to meet our every desire!
Amen. Well said Deb! 🙂
Deb,
Amen Sister! It brought tears of joy to my eyes!
This is an extremly powerful video message. I have begged internally and externally to be known for most of my life and all along the One that has known me, even before I knew myself and that matters most, was always waiting for me to realize it. Never once has He let me down, and I pray that throughout this journey (this study) I can truly listen to Him.
Praying for that too for you Michelle. I love your heart’s willingness to be so real and to ask so vulnerably.
I completely agree with you, Michelle. That video is very powerfull and has brought tears to my eyes. I have never felt really known by anyone before and yet God knows me inside out. He knows my past, my hurts, what i’ve been through where i am now, He not only knows me but understands me and he still loves me. He knows how to show me in his gentle way.
And I haven’t even looked at the chapter yet!
I am amazed by the emotion-evoking video. Though I have been a Christian for many years, I am full of insecurity and the feelings of shame and unworthiness. I really feel like a failure evem though I know I have been redeemed by the blood of the Lamb. I am looking forward to not allowing my emotions and feelings be in control…but lettting Christ lead. I want to grow as a woman of God! I am thankful for each of you…and Renee, thanks for allowing God to use you! God’s timing is perfect!
Amen
this grabed my heart. I know I want all of this every day. Prise God
Wow
This chapter made me think about my perception of God I grew up with and the one that has developed as I have gotten older. As a child, I grew up thinking of God as an untouchable/unreachable being that was watching all that I did (right or wrong). Growing up as a Catholic, I was taught that you needed to keep track of your sins so that you could confess them. I never even considered a personal relationship with God. I am so glad that I now view him as a forgiving and loving God that wants to meet us where we are, flaws and all.
I grew up believing God was afar off somewhere in the heavens just looking down on me. I never realized how I mattered to Him & how He loves me just the way I am.
How do I know if I truly belong to God? That is my heart’s true desire, but it seems like I keep getting confused and have doubts about my salvation. I want to know God!
Ashley, towards the end of chapter 2 I share how you can have a personal relationship with Jesus.
If you invite Him into your heart and accept His death on the Cross and payment for your sins and receive His forgiveness and grace – then you will be saved. At that point the Holy Spirit comes and dwells in you. And sweet friend, no matter what, you cannot lose your salvation. Sin, discouragement, doubt, anger, bad days doesn’t mean you are not saved. That is all normal.
Salvation is not a feeling, it’s a decision. I just want to make sure you know that. Salvation is about turning to Jesus and turning away from sin and our self-focused life. That is the first step of saying “I do.”
Then sanctification comes over time as we follow jesus, surrendering more and more of our heart and our life to Him each day – that’s when we begin to experience the power of the Holy Spirit in us as we let Him lead our thoughts and our decisions.
It’s a moment by moment relationship that builds over time – just like any relationship. The key is to get into God’s word like you are through this study 🙂 and to get God’s word into you.
I hope this helps. After you read all of Chapter 2, let us know if you have more questions. You are loved and treasured. We are so glad you are here!
oh thanks renee, i needed to rehear that, i know i’m saved, but you worded it so wonderfully! i might just have to print it off:-))
one question tho, how do we know if we’re doing enough for Him, i listen to some of my friends & i always seem to fall short.
Nice,
I know, it can be quite confusing. But it’s not in our doing for Him. It’s in our relationship with Him. It’s in our love for Him. You can’t do anything that is going to make Jesus not love you any more than He already does. And there is nothing that you can do that will make Him love you more. He loves us because we are His. He loves us because it’s His nature to love us. And He created us to love Him back.
It’s all about Jesus residing in your life/heart and you loving Him back. You are worth His love because He chose to give it to you. It’s with us knowing who He is and us relying on Him instead of us relying on ourselves or others.
His grace and love are free to us. We just have to ask for them. He wants to know you up close and personal.
Praying that answers your question, if not, please let me know. Praying for God to flood you with His understanding and His love.
Blessings,
Donna
I love this conversation…. Words I needed to read today!
Thank you Renee for your words. I too even though I was saved and baptized when I was 16, sometimes I have doubts because I don’t seem to feel as close to God as others do. Easter Sunday I went to my Aunts church. When I go to churches where people are jumping up and down, raising their hands to the music and seem so at peace, I feel so out of place like I don’t belong. I don’t know if that makes sense. I’m quiet and reserved so sometimes I wonder if I were truly saved, wouldn’t I want to jump up and down showing my excitement as well. Shouldn’t I be excited to be going to church instead of nervous?
I know I’m saved. It’s the best decision I made. My struggle is to get my adult daughter to see that Jesus loves her. She gave her life to Jesus but is struggling with faith. I see her has the Samaritan woman. I also see myself as Sam. My heart breaks for my daughter and Sam. I hope she will read it one day. I pray that I can be an example. She struggles with serve depression. I know it stems from doubt. I personally am reading the book a second time. This chapter changed how I view myself, for the better. I struggle with poor body image. I’m over weight. This is a daily struggle.
Renee-thank you for sharing with me earlier in reply to my post….your words spoke to my heart and I truly asked Jesus to save me but am still having doubts creep into my mind…I feel like I will never have assurance and that this is how my life is going to be…please pray for me…I am so discouraged.
thanks,still learning how to do this every day,even after all these years.
I have never heard it explained quite this way. Absolutely phenomenal!!!!! I’ve got a much clearer understanding. Thank you Renee and thank you Ashley !!!!
Renee,
What beautiful words to explain the coming of one’s salvation with our LORD Jesus Christ! I too feel like I would like to copy such a wonderful heartfelt guiding of a soul to Him. Thank you so much for your words to those who have questions, to those of us who hurt and need healing, to those who need to feel confident in the love of our Maker and Sustainer. Thank you for letting us be a part of this wonderful growing community of Christ!
Thanks Renee for doing a great favor to so many people by writing this book!
You are leading many to accept Christ and truly trust Him.
May God bless your every efforts!
Renee – I needed those words today. I know I have been saved but, but all too often, the negative words flood my thoughts and push the truth of God’s word far from my grasp. 55 years of put-downs are often bigger than 3 years of build-ups. It is so hard to remember that I am loved.
Hi there all of you. I love that we’re talking about all of this together. I’ve been so eager to get back online after I did some writing today, so I could share these verses with you 🙂 God’s word has to be our final be all, end all in our search for truth – the way, the truth and the Life is in Jesus the living word and in the BIble, God’s written word.
We can’t rely on our emotions or thoughts b/c we have an enemy who attacks us there and he will do all he can to make you doubt yourself and your salvation.
BUT God gets the final word and read what He says here in Ephesians 1: 5-14
In love he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will— to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves. In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that he lavished on us. With all wisdom and understanding, he[d] made known to us the mystery of his will according to his good pleasure, which he purposed in Christ, to be put into effect when the times reach their fulfillment—to bring unity to all things in heaven and on earth under Christ.
In him we were also chosen,[e] having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will, in order that we, who were the first to put our hope in Christ, might be for the praise of his glory.
And you also were included in Christ when you heard the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation. When you believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession—to the praise of his glory.
I especially want to emphasize that this is God’s doing, and He wanted to save you!! It was God’s pleasure to choose you, He planned to adopt you when you responded to His offer, and when you believed, you were sealed with a deposit of the Holy Spirit guaranteeing your inheritance – salvation, redemption, security and hope– you are God’s treasured possession.
Now read this again and again, write it down word for word as a letter to yourself. Then write it down and thank God for it, claiming these truths for yourself one by one.
If you will teach your mind to think truth, your emotions will follow. Through my book I want to show you how important this is and equip you to change the way you think – which will change the way you feel – and then that will transform the way you live BUT it can’t start with your feelings. You have to take the reigns with your thoughts first. You can do this. Im praying for you – it will take time but I promise if I can do this and overcome the plague of doubts I have faced – you can too!!!
Ashley, my precious sister in Christ;
Renee had stated it perfectly. I was going through a rough patch last year and the only thing that kept me were the promises of God; read & believe Psalm 139 along with our verse Jeremiah 1:5 which confirms our place in God through Christ Jesus. The Lord reminded me that my faith MUST take precedence over my feelings. My obedience to Him by the leading of the indwelling Holy Spirit always guides me to that place in His Word that comforts me and reassures me that I’m saved, it’s going to take some purposeful praise, worship and alone time with God our Father to feel you’re saved.
You can be sure when you study His Word and someone says something to you that only God could’ve told them to. You go to church and the pastor is confirming what the Holy Spirt has already revealed to you as you’ve read the Holy Word. Pray about all things and trust God’s Word. So stay in His Word which is our reassurance that we are truly saved. Like any other relationship we must work on our relationship with God and it starts by getting to know God through consistently reading His word asking the Holy Spirit to open your understanding. He is able and we can do all things through Christ Jesus who strengthens us.
All my doubting sisters, please note that it doesn’t matter how mature a Christian we are, we are all work in progress and none of us will be perfected until we go to live with our Lord. Daily we have to die to self & self will and give ourselves away to the Lord. We must stay under the shadow of the Almighty God to be at peace in our relationship with Him. Knowing then that we are being kept in the hollow of His hands where nothing, nor noone can snatch us away.
I continue to pray for our faith and love for God & each other, which will help us conquor all doubts & fears. May the reassurance of our salvation through this bible study and shared personal experiences laced with the studying of God’s Holy Word, help us to sing praises and hallelujahs to Him, knowing that we are a chosen and peculiar people called by God who first loved us and truly desires to have an intimate relationship with each and every one of us.
Thank you Renee. This blesses me so much to hear these words. There is hope in knowing that my relationship with The Lord will begin to deepen first by me gaining control if my thoughts and is not dependent on my feelings. I also struggle with wondering if I am doing enough for The Lord. I love Him with all my heart but I feel my feelings create so many barriers. I am looking forward to learning how to let go, and trust Him with all of the areas of my life and to be set free from my pain and guilt. I am so encouraged to know HE loves me and ready to learn how to truly believe and understand with all that I have that His love is perfect and unconditional.
Hi Renee,
Those are wonderful words to live by. You have a way with words. I grew up Lutheran and became Catholic 10 years ago. I don’t know how to say this exactely, so I will just say it. I am a little put off with some of the negative Catholic comments. I have had a completely different experience in the Catholic church. I understand that everyone’s experience is different. Am I allowed to be here? I would love to be a part of the bible study and hang out with you guys here.
Thanks
Sheryl,
I am rejoicing that you are here. A relationship with Christ has nothing to do with a church or faith, it is a personal, intimate, up-close encounter with the God of the Universe. This is all about learning God’s word and applying it to our lives. May you be greatly blessed as I have been already. You are my sister and I am excited you are a part of this. Praying for you on this journey.
Dawn
Hi Dawn,
Thanks for your reply. Well said! That’s the way I feel, too, Sister.
Bless u.
Sheryl
I love what you said about “teaching our minds to think truth and our emotions will follow.” I just started reading through Proverbs and this reminds me of verses in Chapter 3 about “pondering the path of our feet so that our ways will be sure.” That makes me think of being confident in His truth for us.
Renee, I love reading you what you write. I have so many things happening in my life and stuff from my childhood that makes it so hard to to accept or believe that I am worthy of Gods love or healings. I pray that I can learn to believe and trust that I am worthy. Thank you for sharing all of this. My life is a huge struggle right know. your writings help so much. Thank you!
At Stacey…I totally understand about what you mean about feeling uncomfortable about jumping up and down at church. I recently accepted Christ into my heart about four or more months ago so I am new at this and I too have found myself looking at the others around me at church who lift their arms up to the sky as they sing, etc, and I have thought to myself…I must not be as Christian as them for I dont, nor want to do that, but you know what, it doesnt matter. Everyone prays to God in their own way. Everyone sings to God on their own way. You dont have to be the loudest in church or the jumpiest, haha. God knows how you feel about Him by whats in your heart. Do not compare yourself to others around you and how they act in or out of church. There are even people who sing their hearts out during worship, who lift their arms up, who shout Amen the loudest, but that doesnt mean they are more Christian than you or than me because I have also seen people who do that but once they step out of church they do not act very Christian. It isnt a popularity contest, and trust me, I used to think the same thing, especially being a new Christian cause I, like you, am more reserved during worship songs, and from what I am learning, God loves us for us, period. Hope this helps. 🙂
At Ashley, I wanted to tell you that I too have been ‘saved’ yet I wrestle with worry, anxiety, and doubt every day. I have been that way since I can remember. A lot of it has to do with how I was raised, in a negative environment, and raised Catholic, meaning, I was basically brought up with the feat of God rather than learning God loves me for me and that all He wants is a relationship with us. Anyways, growing up my mother, and still to this day, has never been very supportive of me, never compliments me, and basically her and my sister just treat me like dirt. And so .i grew up with low self esteem and surrounded by negativity and always trying to feel them love me. Because of that my relationship with God was kind of like that. I would instead yell at Him instead of actually praying. I would wonder why all this keeps happening to me, why He lets them treat me like this, and dont get me wrong, I still ask .god this everyday and .i am almost forty! They still treat me bad and make me feel bad about myself and unloved. i am the blacksheep of the family. My father is the only one who ever has complimented me or treated me just a bit better then they have. But now my father has ALS and as I watch his body fail him more and more each day I have cried to God and yelled at God wondering why?! Why out of my family would God do this to the one person in my family that actually makes me feel like I am loved, even if just a little bit, why would God do that, not only to my dad, but to me. Sounds selfish I know, and even wrong to think why my dad and not my mom, not that I want my mom to have ALS, no one should, this disease is horrific, but I cant stop having these thoughts of why? I doubt all the time, but then I talk to friends I have met in church who point me in the right direction or show me where to go in the Bible. I now pray to God to not let my father have to hurt or suffer long. i actually ask God now to take him earlier so my father doesnt have to go thru the rougher parts of the disease. As mad as I am that he is dying, I rather im go sooner cause I know this is just so hard for my dad. I also have doubts of Gods love for me. I also thought that this was just another way .god was telling me, haha Holly, I dont love you so now Im taking you dad from you so you can be left with your mom and sister and have no one left in your family to love you. I compare Gods love for me on how I am loved here on earth. I figure is my own mother and sister who are suppose to love me cant do that, they say they do, but actions speak louder than words, I figure if the people that I can feel, see, and hear dont love me than how can I trust that God, a man I can not see, cant hear, how can .i trust he actually loves me when alls I see around me is things telling me He doesnt. Then, because of things I have learned, and am learning, like in this study, that it is evil that is crowded up my brain. My doubts are my worst enemy. They destroy me. They always have. I was raised to see the negative in everything so to try and look on the positive or believe that someone actually loves me is very hard for me. Its like the mouse getting the cheese, it is a habit now for me to think this way, to be this way. Even though I wrestle everyday with doubt and look to the negative, it doesnt mean I am not saved. It just means .i have more work to do. By getting involved at my church and in bible studies I am finding out ways to stop my thoughts or now I know that it is just say, the devil trying to cloud my mind and keep me from seeing God. But because I have learned that I now know to stop and tell myself that. It isnt easy. It is very hard. But dont ever think that you arent saved because you have doubts. We will always have doubts, it is how we are wired. But now we go to Gods word to help us sort out our doubts and feelings.
I hope this helps. I know I am not the best to hear from since I am so new to all this and I have doubts too, but I just wanted you both to know you are not alone and that your comments was read. 🙂
Have a great day girls!
Holly
I am going through marriage struggles. I have sinned and repented, but now my husband is sinning. I am standing strong that God still wants us together and I am staying in faith. I have doubting days and my emotions get in the way. I do many daily devotions, I pray continually, I go to church a couple times a week. Everyday is getting better, but my husband is a Minister… and tells me things that justify his choices and make me question my relationship with God. I wonder sometimes if he has a deeper connnection with God and so because I sinned maybe God is punishing me with this hardship of my husband’s actions. I wonder is God going to favor my husband’s desires over mine because of my actions. When I think about it… It sounds stupid and crazy but those feelings do come into my mind. I hope this is not TMI!! Some days I know that I know that I know!! And other days are harder!! Please pray for US!!
Hi Alhsey
I feel like that to just didn’t want to say it. I feela lot of things but keep them to my self. I doubt my salavtion all the time and if he really loves me. Like you I want to know for sure no doubts at all. I’m not no where near their yet but with the group and all these women to help each other I feel we all will make it. My prayers are with you. and please pray for me as well. New sisters in Christ Amen
Please, please write a short 3-4 week bible study directed at teen girls about the Samaritan woman, Sam. I love her having a name! But what a blessing it would be for girls to hear there value is not in a boy, but with God!!!
You are welcome!! You love Jesus! And, that is all that matters!! I, personally, love you being part of this group. Our focus on Him is all that matters.
Angela2,
In my own life, doubting comes when I get my eyes off Jesus and start looking at myself, or at others. We can trust God to keep His Word. He is our strength, our hope, our security, our protector, our EVERYTHING. Don’t let Satan continue to whisper in your ear and paralyze you with doubt. God says, “I will NEVER leave you”.
At Holly, Thank you so much for the kind words. They helped.
I grew up too thinking that God was far away, but knowing He is right by me walking in front of me and to the left and right of me is so comforting.
To be known and to be loved is a great desire of my heart!
The video made me realize I do not feel known because of fears I have. Like not feeling good enough to be seen by Him or anyone else. It was a great video.
That is a huge life-changer. If we can really understand there heart of God and His heart towards us, it changes everything. praying you will come to know HIM just as HE really is. One of my goals in the book is to show that to each of you – up close and personally!!
I struggle with knowing I am saved. There is always the ‘good enough”. I know that I am saved by Grace, that God loves me just as I am -= as I love my kids but it’s hard for this to penetrate my heart and it is that assurance that I am hoping this study will address.
I am torn between loving God and serving him and forgiving myself and seeing myself through His eyes. As my faith grows stronger everyday there is always that small tug that tells me I am not worthy or good enough. I have 3 daughter and I am a single mother as my husband went to heaven so he could watch over us better. I want my daughters to grow up knowing the are worthy. I loved watching this video!!!!! I made me feel almost powerful in the fact that God knows and he does love me!!
Do you forgive your daughters when they do wrong?? Yes you do!! God forgives you!! HE loves you even when you fall short. I was in a deep dark hole hiding from God and guess who was my only friend and companion? The one I was hiding from….My lord and Savior Jesus Christ!! He could have given up on me but he didnt, He love me even when I wasnt loveable!! He loved me all the way out of the dark hole and back to his loving arms!! He loves you too, unconditionally and all day, everyday!! Just like you love your girls, always and forever. He will love you through every rainy day and sunny day. read 1corinthians 13:4-8… that is our God and who we are to strive to be like… but we fall short and he takes our right hand and pulls us back up to take another step toward him!!! He is LOVE and we are to strive to be that as well!!
In love from my Godly given heart!!
martha i can relate to you, i grew up the same way, im so greatful for The Father picking me up out of the Catholic religion.
Matha and Lisa,
My husband is Catholic. I am filled with hope when I read your posts. I want him to know the love of God and what it is to have a personal relationship with him that isn’t based on guilt or works. There is nothing in this world like being known and accepted by God. Blessings to you!
I had the same exact experience growing up Catholic myself. It just never occurred to me that I could be personally connected with God and have a close relationship with him. I was too busy thinking of the sins I’d committed so I could recite them in the confessional.
Hi,
I hit reply on your post because I can’t seem to figure out how to share my thoughts any other way.
In Chapter one in the discussion questions the first question asks when was your first memory of doubting yourself? I was a little stunned to answer grade school. I knew I was bullied to a certain extent, but what I didn’t realize how much the bullying affected me. The other day my 18 year old son was kidding around while I was using my inhaler. He was joking about the way I used it and then I just stopped useing it. He was still kidding and said Mom were you bulliedas a child or something? I was honest and said yes. It seems as though God is reaching out to me and saying it is ok to be take off my mask of being “fine”.
As I watched the video poem about “Sam” and read through chapter 2 I was crying, too. My Mom had alzheimer’s disease and passed away in 2010. In the last 7 years I have had alot of other people in my life pass away, also. In reading chapter 2 I realized that with friends I put on my “fine” mask. I felt like when someone asked me how I was I only talked about my problems. It really touched me to read that if I don’t take off my “fine” mask then the person I am talking to will not feel comfortable taking off their “fine” mask, either. I want people to be honest with me, so I guess I better be honest with them, too.
The sentence “He is waiting for you to stop, come up close, and turn your heart to His” really spoke to me, too. I think that sums up how I would like to wake up every morning!
Sheryl
Know one ever taught me that one can have a personal relationship with God. I GREW up in a dead church that judged and falsely accused those who did not conform to there ways. The church I GREW up in was corrupt spiritually in a sense that they put on a particular mask only to find out down the road that elders n leaders of the church were living lies in front of the church.