I had planned to share my verse from She Speaks earlier this week, but I didn’t want to start talking too soon. Reading your stories in the comments for my last post makes me feel like we’re sitting on our beds in our jammies talking about our promises and what they mean to each of us. My favorite part has been listening. It’s felt so right to not say anything so I could simply read about how HE SPEAKS to each of us.
God spoke to me Saturday night in a powerful way with a new Word. I was so taken back because this word wasn’t on any of the cards. It wasn’t something He’d ever given me before. It was something only He knew I needed to hear. He delivered it through a messenger much like Gideon’s angel, who called him out of his hiding place so he could fulfill God’s call on his life.
Like Gideon, I am a woman who struggles with doubt. I don’t want to struggle with doubt. I want it to GO AWAY. I look at so many resilient and confident women and want to be like them. Yet God keeps me dependent on Him through my doubt. It can push me towards discouragement or pull me into His truth for perspective, strength and direction.
Doubt had come on like a storm in the weeks preparing for She Speaks. I was wrestling with what to say, how to say it and how to weave it all together. I knew God wanted me to share my testimony, but I was hesitant. I didn’t know what part to share and I didn’t want my message to be about me. Voices of doubt tangled my thoughts as I tried to untangle my testimony for the message. In the end, I shared things I’ve never shared before all for the purpose of telling His story in my life.
I also knew God wanted me to share the gospel. Although it was a Christian conference, with 560 women in attendance I sensed there would be some who didn’t know Him. It became clear during my prayer and prep time that I needed to explain the power of the Cross, why Jesus made Himself our sacrificial lamb, offering up His life as our perfect sacrifice so that we could be free to live in the Truth. If God was going to lead us out of the shadow of doubt, we had to end up in the shadow of the Cross. It changes EVERYTHING!
As I stepped down from speaking, I joined the audience worshiping, soaking in God’s presence and trying to grasp the reality of His promises. The music faded, the lights went up and a pretty woman with blond hair came up to me. She handed me a piece of paper with a verse reference on it. Then she spoke these words over me:
“For the accuser of our brothers, who accuses them before our God day and night, has been hurled down. They overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony;” Revelation 12:11
She looked into my eyes and said, “Renee, you OVERCAME the accuser by the blood of the Lamb and the word of your testimony!”
Praise God, she was right!!!!!!! The accuser, who had been taunting, threatening and discouraging so many hearts (including mine), had been defeated! I had not stayed in the the shadow of darkness. I had ministered from the shadow of the cross. Through my testimony of God’s redemption and the power of the blood of the Lamb, I OVERCAME the enemies of my doubt and fears. It’s a truth we can all claim!
As I read your comments and other blogs this week with your testimonies, I can’t help but feel like we’re watching this promise be fulfilled again and again.
So that my friend is my promise and my Word. OVERCAME. It’s not just what is going to happen, but what already did. He is so faithful, isn’t He?
Thank you for sharing your heart. It used to be difficult for me to open up and share the trials and tragedies of my life, until I realized that without telling those stories, how would I ever be able to share all the good things God has given me out of them? How would I let other people know they aren’t alone and they don’t have to suffer? Thank you for reminding me to share my testimony and for showing me that no one is perfect and everyone has a story.
Heartfelt blessings,
Marie
What a testimony! WOW!
Prayers and Blessings!
Rebecca
Renee your talk that night was SO powerful! God was alive and so close!
I was so uncomfortable with coming to the cross to lay my doubts because I’ve never done anything like that before. But I felt God telling me to go and I wanted to obey. When I was standing in line a dear sister in Christ asked if she could pray with me.
My struggle was how do I know if it’s God’s call on my life to speak to women or just my pride of wanting affirmation and attention.
My promise…was CHOSEN! And through the conference I do believe that He has called me to minister to other women. I’m not sure how exactly but I feel so loved and special in His eyes!
That night was incredibly powerful and one I will never forget. I’ve never thought or said this before but I truly felt like I was standing on Holy Ground when I was up front.
I could go on and on but this is definately long enough for here!! 🙂
Thanks for letting Christ shine through you! I love ya sister!! 🙂
And by the way – we just began the process of adopting another child…this time through the States. So we’re on a similar UNknown journey as you. But God is faithful!!
Renee,
I can’t fully express what your message from His heart did to mine. As I sat there and wept–tears of the doubts that had plagued my soul for many years and for a variety of reasons the Lord applied healing ointment. Into the cracks and crevices of the places I had neglected.
Your message was timely. For as He has laid on my heart something to do to share His life and love with others, my inabilities come screaming to the forefront of my mind. Always. But that night I knew I would take whatever there is of me and give it over to Him once and for all—until He comes.
I make an attempt at writing devotions weekly. I write for Internet Cafe` and Laced with Grace—and EVERYSINGLETIME the Lord shows up to point something out to me—whether through the scripture He gives me—or through a comment some dear soul leaves me…God wraps His love and healing around my battlescared soul. Scars similar to so many women today. Life scars.
I appreciate and love your willing heart to share “truth”—as we each live it daily—and all to often try to hide that side of our lives. God used you in a mighty way. Don’t doubt that.
I look forward with GREAT anticipation to next year. I have posted as much as I can on my blog to encourage others to attend. My sister Aimee and I are planning on dragging two minister’s wives with us next year!
Be blessed Renee,
(((HUGS)))~Angie
That is awesome. It gave me chills. I love to hear how God speaks!
I’m still processing the weekend. I was able to share with my adult SS class this morning about some of the events, but words sometimes get in the way (and I am a woman of MANY words…).
As I taught my group of 27 adult Seniors this morning, I was at complete peace about my time with them, and am more convinced than ever, that teaching his Word (both through writing and speaking) is what God would have me be doing for the rest of my days.
Little or big…it doesn’t matter. Sometimes I think that it does, but what he’s after is a faithful obedience. Thus, I bend, and I ask for the humility and grace to receive my portion.
Thanks, Renee, for walking it through. I pray that God will continue to shape you for your “next”…with the courage and fearless faith that runs hard to take hold of ALL OF THAT for which Christ Jesus has taken hold of you.
It’s a big much, my friend. Just keep moving toward that Much and toward his marvelous light.
Love you and as always,
peace for the journey~elaine
Renee, I presented you with an award today. Stop by my blog to see it.
There’s an unspeakable blessing when you’re the one ministered to when God is using you to minister to others, isn’t there?
Although I wasn’t there to see it all firsthand, I appreciate hearing what came about after the “Rescue Me” post. He is immeasurably faithful.
Beautiful testimony on Saturday and in this post. I have read how God touched so many hearts through your testimony on Saturday.
She Speaks represented a journey of obedience out of my comfort zone with Saturday as no exception. I am so thankful I followed God’s leading.
I wrote a post on my blog about how Saturday’s message touched me and about the card I picked up. My word was CHOSEN, and part of the verse (1 Peter 2:9) read “for he called you out of the darkness into his wonderful light.” Very powerful!
Amen! That is so encouraging. You are such a blessing and God delivered a powerful word through you. I love His confirmation to you. What a HUGE blessing to be so loved by Him. He chose you girl to be His instrument that evening! It doesn’t get much better than that. Keep walking in obedience-it touches so many lives for HIM.
Much love,
Angela
I wrote this verse in the front of my Bible on the page with my name and personal information just this year. I too cherish this verse and have shared this verse recently with our youth in a Sunday school class. What a perfect fit to the message you gave that night! I was taken back when I found this verse as I too have overcome by the blood of the Lamb. What a sweet blessing for that lady to share this wonderful verse with you that night. That was definitely from God!!
In His Graces~Pamela
I love how you are so willing to share your doubts and fears.
Last year I went to She Speaks and heard you speak.I thought to myself “How I wish that I could be like her.”
“I’m sure she doesn’t have any doubts of where God is taking her.”
But God has showed me through your sharing that we all must depend on Him.
For years I walked around allowing my past to bury me with shame and bitterness.But I know now that it’s His mercy and grace that gives me the strength to overcome.
Rev.12:11 is one for my favorite verses.
Now everyday I pray that God will use my testimony to help someone overcome Satan’s lies.
Very cool! Very beautiful!
I’m glad god ministered to you as well as everyone in the audience. Audience sounds like the wrong word — family. That’s better.
Have a great weekend. I’m off to take a quick nap. I know, I emailed you I didn’t get up until 10, but I’m sleepy and I’m at B&N; tonights. Since it is Sat. the store doesn’t close until 11. Who knows how long it will take us to put things back where they go after that!
Renee,
Thank you for your words – they went straight to my heart. God has been working on me lately to step out for Him lately and your reminder and example show me what I need to do – overcome. He is the one that will help me do it. Thank you for sharing from your heart, it’s a blessing. God bless, Jill
Hi Renee,
Your message Saturday night was powerful and God called it a “Home Run”. He was in the stands and on the field watching His girl run her race. I told you in an earlier post that God had been talking to me about shadows and spotlights. My word was that the spotlight is to be on Him. I am always to point to Him, the lamb that takes away the sin of the world. I am supposed to speak in the shadow of the cross. I do not like being on stage. I joke around about wanting to be the invisible speaker. God gave me the idea to make a 6 ft. mosaic mirrored cross last year. While I was making it, He gave me a powerful message showing me the cross from His viewpoint. What He can do with broken mirror pieces of His image…He makes everything beautiful in its time! I bought a spotlight to shine on the cross whenever I give that talk. Your eye is drawn to the cross and not to me… the speaker. Your message pointed to the Lord who is your strong tower. I was praying for you before the conference. Your “Rescue Me” post told me you were in a battle. What God is teaching me through you sharing your doubts is the enemy is always after our mind. This is never going to get easier, but I can grow stronger. God has raised you up, but He allows our weak spots so we will lean more on Him. My struggle is going to continue but I am going forward anyway. I take heart because He overcame and made it possible for me and you to do the same. Maybe She Speaks should have a PJ session with a 3 minute open mike saying “what are you going to do with what He has spoken to you?” We can all identify with our dorkiness as Lysa blogged, our doubts as you talked about, but are we just going to go “me too” or overcome those hurdles. Keep advancing on new ground Renee. The best is yet to be! Thank you Jesus :=)
His “B” girl,
Barbara
Wow. Just Wow.
For His glory!
Warm hugs,
Sharon 🙂
Ah Renee, you have moved my heart to tears. How precious that God would speak His Word over your life. You were obedient to His call and He gave you such a treasured gift. I am thanking Him now for what He has done for you and claiming victory both now and forever. Praying God has eliminated all doubt and that you will continue to walk in the assurance of His promises for you. We have a very BIG and very personal God. Praise His Name!
Love, hugs and prayers,
Joy
Rene,
What a powerful testimony of God’s love! OVERCAME, is exactly what I needed to hear. In the midst of the hardest trials life can deal. His grace has brought me through them with scars. For years I have felt like I have battled the destruction they left behind. Scars are not possible without the healing taking place. In hearing the word OVERCAME I no longer need to be a hostage of my past. God is simply amazing how he can use Even Me to share of his love. It is humbling isn’t it?
Blessings,
Diane