I’ve tried to start this post so many times. I’m not sure how many of you meet me here and also on Facebook where I’ve been sharing updates. But for those who might be wondering, I wanted to stop in to say hi and let you know where I’ve been.
Our family is going through some hard stuff, and I’ve needed to pull back and pull in close to the ones who need me most.
Three weeks ago, my father was hospitalized with kidney failure, we drove 20 hours round trip to Florida to be with him, and my newborn nephew was hospitalized and had emergency surgery while we were there. Two days after we returned home, Aster, our almost 3 year old daughter was diagnosed with a speech disorder.
School started, speech therapy started and my dad was transferred to hospice last week. A day later my mom started having severe breathing problems and we ended up in the Dr.’s office. She’s not been married to my dad for 43 years so this is all unrelated. We’re still waiting to figure out the cause of her health concerns.
Then, this Monday afternoon, my father took two deep breaths and was gone. His life ended and our walking through the valley of the shadow of death began.
We’re in Florida now. And the first thing I want to tell you is this: God keeps His promises. He’s been with us. His goodness and mercy is following us, His rod and staff are guiding and comforting us.
He’s met us here in our place of sadness and sorrow in ways I could not imagine. I’ve been asking Him to wrap His mercy around my heart and the hearts of my brothers as we grieve our loss – not only for the future we won’t have with Dad, but also the past we longed for but never had with him either.
But oh how our Heavenly Father has met us here… rushing to our sides and comforting our hurts, giving us courage to let go and perseverance to hold on – to Him and each other.
Dad’s memorial service is Friday so we’ll be here all week. But when life settles down and words come more easy, I’ll be back. To write and to announce the winners of my last two give-aways. Until then, let’s stay in touch on Facebook. Love you so!
Ps. I also wanted to let you know my friend Samantha has a Confident Heart give-away and Melissa Taylor with Proverbs 31 Ministries is leading an online Bible/Book study of A Confident Heart. We wanted to make sure you know that you are invited! For more information, click here.
Hi Renee, I am so sorry for your loss. Please know that I have been praying for you and for your family. Your book and bible study has been a blessing to me. I will keep praying for you and your team.
Oct.5/11. Wow! Your family has had a tough go of it.. Hope this finds you with some rest now. May God bless you and yours. I will pray for you that your strength may stay strong. DARLENE CANADA
Hi Renee i’ve been thinking about you and just wanted you to know that even though this post was from mid-September i am still praying for you and your family. love from a sister in Christ
thoughts & prayers are with you Renee, I’ve called for all prayer wariors on my blog
http://sittingathisfeetministry.blogspot.com/2011/09/prayer-request.html
Helen
I am so sorry to hear about your father’s death, mother’s illness and daughter’s speech disorder. I am praying for you and your loved ones!
Dear Renee,
I am sorry for your loss and pray that God will shower you with comfort.
I just picked up your book A Confident Heart because I was looking to gain back my confidence since I lost my job. I am on chapter three now and have not answered the questions at the end of chapters 1 & 2 because the memories are too painful to revisit at this time.
I have been a Christian for four years now and I do not feel as if I am growing in Christ. I am hopeful and also praying that your book will do that for me – just get me out of my own way so God can fully envelop my life.
I read a lot of self help books and they seem to have the answers when I am reading but then I revert to my old patterns and get stuck. Do you have any suggestions on how I can incorporate these lessons into my life?
I read my Bible and pray every night but something is missing. As you stated about “Sam”, maybe it is only a surface thing right now. But I so desperately want it to be more…
Thank you for listening and God bless!!
A friend’s been sending me your emails & today’s (9-23) really hit home. I’ve had a not very good childhood-drinking, abuse etc. My husband, the love of my life, passed away 6 1/2 yrs. ago & I’m nowhere near over it. I’m so sad and lonely and I hate the way I’m (not) living my life now. I’m so tired of being sad & alone- just living day to day in a fog. Nothing interests me. I’ve recently gone back to Church & I’m meeting with my pastor regularly and that was helping but not so much anymore. The sadness and loneliness are just there all the time. I can’t wait until it’s finally my turn to die & no I’m not suicidal but I haven’t found anything that makes me happy anymore. I really don’t see God doing much for me but I suppose I have to do for myself. Good luck.
Praying for you and your family .I’m confident that our Heavenly Father is watching over you, and giving you comfort.
In His all abundant love,
Grace:)
Dear Renee,
My thoughts and prayers are with you right now at this difficult time. It seems like that when it rains it pours! I read your post at p31 about healing our past and looking forward to our future. When my precious son died eight years ago at the age of 20, from an unknown congenital heart defect; my whole world went totally crazy!
I ranted and raved at God. I was angry that God didn’t take me and let him live. I moved to CA to stay with my daughter whom I had a rocky relationship with. I started drinking and hanging out at bars. I was waking up in strange places and not remembering how I got there.
During this time I met my now husband. He invited me to church and helped led me to God. I learned of a great many things coming from that time. One of the things I learned was that the whole time I was angry, hurt, and doing those harmful things to myself, was that God was protecting me and with me the whole time. He loved me that much! Another thing I learned was the price God paid when he sacrificed his son for our sins. He loves us enough to sacrifice the thing that meant the most to him! That is a powerful love! I still marvel at that everyday! What I am trying to say is that while everything is a ball of pain right now, that it will pass and God’s presence will stay with you, like he did with me and that I hope that this brings you measure of comfort and peace to you. I want you to know that things will eventually get better and my prayer is for you and your family to find comfort at this difficult time.
Renee,
Please know that many of us are praying for you and your entire family. God’s love is with you always. You are an amazing woman and have encouraged me many times through KLOVE and proverbs31. My thoughts are with you during this difficult season.
Thank you for all you do.
Mandy Blake
I am so very sad to hear of the loss of your dad : ( Psalm 34:18 says “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” HIS word always comforts and encourages me when nothing else will do. Blessings and prayers to you and your family as you walk this path of loss in the days and weeks ahead.
Renee ~ May our Father God comfort you and your family during this season of sadness. I, too, know the loss of an absent earthly father and have felt the sting of knowing that any future opportunity of a relationship with him was irrevocably lost. Sadly, my children experienced the same thing when their absent earthly father passed away two months ago at 56 years of age. What I can share with you is that our heavently Father can and will comfort you and encourages you to lean in to his promises and hope for the future. Thank you Father God for allowing us to love each other through our pain and grief, may you bless Renee and her family with a very special measure of your grace and mercy as they travel through the shadows of the valley of death. Amen
Hello Renee,
I know from my own experience you will be lifted up and held and surrounded by God through this ongoing grief. It is truly a wondrous thing to live through. God is so good. Currently, I’m lviing with a few worries of my own. My brother, not a Christian and whose salvation I’ve been praying for for some time, is currently (again) in the hospital (he’s 71) with legs filled with fluid and the doctors are looking for clots. He was taken to the hospital because he had trouble breathing. He’s been in and out of the hospital for most of this year. Doubts? Oh yes, I have doubts constantly about why I can’t get beyond this point to put all my trust in God. I absolutely believe Jesus is my Savior and I trust in His Word, but putting my whole life and trust in God is very hard–it’s the letting go, and how-in-the-world-do-I-do-this? part that I have such a struggle with. I do know that God is with you through all your struggles, though, and I admire you that you continue to think of others during this time.
Stephanie
Renee,
My prayers are with you and your family at this time. My life has been filled with trials in the last year and Jeremiah 29:11 has been my lifeline. I really identified with what you wrote today and thank you so much for taking the time to write today’s devotional, with all else that you are going through. You have helped me, and I’m sure many others as well. God Bless You.
Renee,
I too am sorry for the circumstance you now find yourself in.
In response to the P31 devotion, I was listening to Dr. David Jeremiah the other morning on my way to work. He said he had a conversation with someone who had asked the question, “If God loves us so much why does He let bad people do bad things to others?” His reply was that He loves us so much that He allows it to happen because He gives everyone a choice.
It brings to mind 3 different type of parents: 1)controlling, vengeful parents, 2)ones who don’t care or are overwhelmed and so they are like the old saying about the Ostrich burying his head in the sand (which btw is a myth) or 3) caring but strict parents who provide opportunities for training.
I’m so glad we serve a loving God! Aren’t you?
I pray that God will wrap His arms around you and your family especially you. May His grace, mercies and comfort abound in your life as you walk through this season.
Thanks for today’s devotion. So practical.
First and foremost, I send you and your family my sypathy and prayers for the loss of your father. I want to thank you for todays devotion. It was as if God was speaking directly to me. ( I am sure He was ). You are truely gifted in and through the Holy Spirit. Thank you for sharing, I truely needed it ! You reminded me of the hope and peace of the future.
I am sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my prayers this day.
Renee,
I am so sorry for all you are going through right now.
I just wanted to thank you for the Encouragement for Today Devotion. I sometimes struggle with feelings of hopelessness and today’s devotion has given me renewed hope.
A little over 2 years ago, my husband of 14 years left me. He left me with 3 adopted children and over $600,000 of debt. For the last 2 years, we get by 1 day at a time. We have been though so much and we are still struggling, some days are so very hard. I know that God has a plan for us in the middle of this horrible mess, but some days are harder than others and this week has been very hard.
Again, thank you for today’s encouragement.. “God works all things together for good.” “I was created for a purpose” “God has a plan for our lives.”
I know that we will get through this dark valley and God has something so much better waiting for us on the other side.
Blessings..Karen
Renee,
Just a month ago I lost my father under similar circumstances. It was such a powerful loss in the midst of two other medical crisis by people close to my heart while I had just welcomed a newborn daughter. My father and I were sadly estranged for the last six years of his life and had a rocky relationship at best while I was growing up. But in those final days Jesus gave me the sweet peace of knowing my dad loved me and would see me in heaven. It is so hard to process the finality of his life here but I know our story isn’t over and we will have all the hugs, dances and laughter I longed for on earth together in God’s kindgom. I pray you and your family can find comfort and peace as well. I will be saying prayers for you! Michelle
I pray that you and your family will experience more of God at this time in your life.
Hello Renee and all my new friends who are sharing in A Confident Heart. First of all I would like to tell
Renee that I am so sorry about the loss of your Dad. I lost both parents many years ago, so I know where you are, girlfiend. I did have the wonderful blessing of Christian, but dysfuntional parents, so I was never without a parent to go to, and now am I blessed with Christian In Laws. So know that I feel your pain. I am so looking forward to the online study right NOW because I am being robbed of my joy for life by letting other strip away my confidence and self esteem. I am standing firm in the Lord and have told Satan to get behind me, I have NO use for him. That’s all for now. By the way, I live in Denham Springs, Louisiana and will welcome any feedback as we share this study together. I am still tring to get a copy of th book, so pray that one will come available to me in a timely manner. In His Love, Lynda
My heart is breaking for you and your family.Im sorry for your loss. I know the Holy Spirit will give you all you need in this time. Im praying for you and your family.I love you Renee!Your sister in Christ.
Dear Renee,
Your family are in my thoughts and prayers. Know that through our Lord Jesus Christ he will carry you. Please know I will be praying while you are in a time of need.
Carolyn from Lake McQueeney, TX
I joined A Confident Heart b/c I have always struggled with self-confidence and don’t have time to physically join a Bible Study right now so I joined this one on-line.