I don’t know about you, but I love to do things my way! I love to know what to expect and have life fall into place and meet my expectations.
I love feeling like things and circumstances are in control – or that I am. And honestly, in some circumstances I need to be in control, but then there are those times when I need to let it go and trust God with the outcome.
My friend Karen Ehman is a self-professed recovering control-freak. I love that about her! She’s joining me today to talk about her new book, Let.It.Go. Karen is my oh-so amazing-friend and ministry teammate with Proverbs 31 Ministries. She’s also the wife of one very wonderful guy (he helped move furniture and a huge wall hanging at my house not too long ago}! She’s also the mom of 3 great kids, a national speaker and 4-time author. Here’s a little about her new book and how you can win a copy!
Karen’s book Let.It.Go. will empower you to:
- Take control of your schedule yet welcome interruptions from God
- Draw the line between mothering and micromanaging
- Influence your husband instead of manipulating him
- Learn to control your emotions when you can’t control the circumstances
- Stop pursuing the appearance of perfection and start pursuing the person of God
*A companion 6 week dvd and Bible study guide is also available.
I had the chance to interview Karen about this new project. Here is what she had to say:
Karen, tell us a little about why you wrote this book. Are you a control freak?
Ummm….yeah! What woman isn’t about at least some aspect of life? We have so many areas that we must be in charge of—at home, at work, in the church and community. What happens is that we let our strengths of multi-tasking and getting jobs done morph into a weakness of being controlling.
So, are you saying controlling can actually be needed at times?
Of course we must control our homes and schedules and such. We should work with diligence and excellence. What we have to be careful of is going from being conscientious to being controlling. Being conscientious is doing a job well. Being controlling is trying to manipulate the outcome. There is a difference and we know deep down inside when we’ve crossed that line. This book helps women determine how to control what they should, trust God with what they can’t, and most importantly, how to decide which one is which!
What are some areas you cover in the book where women try to run the show?
We try to be in control of our homes, our schedules, our kids, our husbands, our circumstances, others’ opinions of us…..the list is long!
So what is at the root of why we women control?
We control because we don’t trust God. We think we know better than Him just what is best for us. It is as old as the garden of Eden. Well, guess what? God called and He’d like his job back!!
The holidays are coming up. Do they bring out the control freak tendencies in women?
Oh yes….in fact. One whole chapter of the book is about my friend Lisa Whelchel daring me five years ago to not make any decisions for a whole three weeks RIGHT AT THE HOLIDAYS!! It was painful. And actually, in the end, wonderful. I think this topic is so important that I’ve written a free five day resource for women dealing with the holidays called From Chaos to Calm: The LET. IT. GO. Christmas Challenge. Your readers can sign up for it here.
What is your prayer for the woman who reads your book?
I pray that through learning to relinquish control and let go of the reins, she will be able to grab hold of her faith. That her relationship with God will strengthen as she learns to stop trying to fix outcomes and get her own way but seeks His perfect will for her life—and the lives of her loved ones—instead.
Thank you so much Karen!! I’m so excited about your book!
Enter to WIN: Click “Share your Thoughts” below this post and let us know why you’d like to win 2 copies of Karen’s new book, Let.It.Go. as well as a Starbucks gift card! Also, share on Twitter, Facebook and via email and link back to today’s post and then leave another comment for a second chance to win! {I’ll be announcing last week’s winner in another post shortly>}
Learn to control your emotions when you can’t control the circumstances. That is the draw for me. I have two kids with special needs and frankly there is a lot I can’t control. But I’d love to learn how to control my emotions. Looks like a great book
I am a control freak. Oh, I’ve gotten a little better than I used to be. Over the years, I have learned to let go in some areas, but that just means the ones where I haven’t let go are the really tough ones, the areas that I am holding onto for dear life. I know this book will help me. Plus, today is my birthday.
I would love to win the book to give away to one of my christian sisters. I have already ordered it for myself. Seems I am always trying to control someone especially my daughters and husband, or my circumstances. When what I really need to do is learn to controll my self. Having just finished the unglued online bible study, I am doing my best to make some impertect progress. Can’t wait to read this book.
I am happy to find out that I am not the only one with these struggles. I just added a book to my Wishlist.
Being in control has been a way of life for as long as I can remember and now as I truly admit to being an empty nester that control tendency is rearing it’s head even more. I continue to heap responsibilities on myself thinking I need to do it all while realizing that I’m filling my days with more stress than God intended for me to have. I’d love winning two copies of Karen’s book so I can share one with a friend and we can study it together and pray for each other.
I am not a control freak with every aspect of my life, but feel that I can benefit from this book as I learn to let go of worry & self-doubt. I am my biggest critic, like most women. I am searching for a way to live more freely and value myself like He values me! I would be honored to receive 2 copies of this book, one for me and one for my sister. Thank you for the consideration! Have a blessed day!
I think Karen’s book will help me focus on God more and help me keep from irritating my husband. I would share it with friends also!
Thanks Renee for sharing this message. I am so looking forward to receiving my book and the DVD study. I believe Karen has a timely message for me. Blessings.
I just recently realized I’m a control freak. I used to have a different name and point of view for it. As my kids have grown they have shared their points of view… We didn’t match! I’d like to win 2 copies of this book so I can do it with my adult daughter. Then blog about it! 😉
I really appreciated reading this today. I’m not a mom and I’m not even married. But I am trying to figure out God’s plan for my life and who I am supposed to be with (as far as a significant other) is very much a part of my inner control freak. I’ve already experienced the loss of a spouse at the age of 25 where I had no choice in letting go. Relationships now are a lot different, I’ve found someone that I think is worth committing to (again) but he’s not ready. This is where the “letting go” gets hard…stirring up past emotions. It would seem that understanding that its okay to let go in so many different areas would end up helping in this area as well. Control is a scary thing. And the irony of it is that we think it is easier to control….but isn’t it actually easier to let go and let Him handle the details and the concerns? That is the conclusion that I’ve come to…I’m just trying to figure out how to comply. Thank you so much for the obvious….I love the part where you say “God called and He’d like his job back.” 🙂 God Bless!
I am excited about this book. I know that I need to let things go and quit trying to control.
I can’t wait to read this book! I have heard nothing but good things about it and I’ve been told I’m pretty controlling myself which is a trait I would like to correct (or at least harness for good purposes only)!
Wow. Great stuff I wish I realized a long time ago but God can take our good intentions and work them out for His glory. He is in control… if we let Him be.
I think I actually need a copy for almost every woman I know! ;0) Most of all myself! God is still wrestling with me over my control issues. I’m a work in progress.
God has answered my prayers. I have been over controlling of my husband and family for many years. I learned this from my mother. If I am in control, then I do not need to worry about any surprises that I have to deal with….. well I’ve learned this is not true!! Since learning recently of my husbands unfaithfulness, I have been learning how to be a good wife, not controlling him to get my way. Our oldest daughter was just married, and I want to be a better example to her of how to be a loving, influencial wife, not an overbearing control freak! I am hungry to learn how God wants me to change and be a godly wife and mother. God seems to provide for us the resources that we are yearning for to learn how to do things His ways. This book must have been written specifically for me.
I would like to win this book so that I can really let go of my perfectionistic and controlling ways. I would like to be free from control in order to fully rely and trust God.
I have learned over the years – the hard way – to let God have control and to step back. It is still a very big struggle that I continue to pray about. I am doing lots better and in return feel lots better and a lot more relaxed. God is GOOD!
I struggle with being a control freak, perfectionist who thinks I am in complete charge of my life and my family, and have a dear friend who deals with these same struggles. I would love to win copies of the book for she and I – plus we are both big Starbucks fans, so we could discuss what we’ve learned over coffee! 🙂
I have to admit I am a major control freak except when it come to our finances, I leave all that to my better half! but that’s another book I’m sure. Every year as the holidays approach I feel a little anxiety coming on. This season I’ve decided I’m just going to let it go…. I will of course decorate my house and the tree but ya know this year it doesn’t have to be Perfect. My mother would benefit from this book as well sorry to say control runs in the family!
I’ve always been a control freak and so need to change this attitude. This book sounds so helpful and encouraging.
The holiday season is definitely a control inducing time of year for me. Thanksgiving and Christmas have to many things attached to them and it feels like one forgotten thing will be catastrophic. I know it won’t be, but it feels that way anyhow.
I SO NEED this book! I struggle with being a control freak! I try to let go and let God, but Satan has his way with me time & time again. Thanks for the friendly reminder that God wants His job back!
I am Letting Go and Letting God…..have it all today!
Thank you for your devotionals and this post today regarding this great book.
I would love it if i could win the book & join in on the study, holidays have always made me go batty…I know alot of it is unneccessary, i am interested in learning some strategies:)
Id like to learn how to know when to stop controlling. It is so engrained in my nature it surprises me sometimes. When I do catch myself it fees so much better to just give it to God instead. Of course it affects all areas of my life. My best friend Marjorie would benefit from it too. Thanks.
Thank-you for your devo this morning. I am passing it on to my hubby. We are struggling thru a circumstance that has the potential to drag us into the pit but we are trying to rise above it as Jesus would. It is soooo hard not to focus your thots on worry rather than God. Thank-you for this reminder for us especially at this moment!!! We needed to hear it. I think like us all I would like to be able to control the situation.
My name is Pam and I have a control problem!! Oh my! I would love to read LET IT GO and share another copy with my friend : )
Thanks for this post and for the offer of Karen’s book. This is one of the main issues that God has to work on with me. I was raised with the mantra of being self-sufficient, not needing anyone, etc., and it has spilled over into having to have control over every aspect of my life and every person in my life, to the point of going into depression and having anxiety attacks when things don’t go as planned. God has been working with me on it, and it is a constant struggle to let go and let God. A good friend of mine is going through a whole series of personal crises and it would be a true blessing to her to have this resource, and we could use the Starbucks card to meet over coffee and go throught the book
Bless you Renee for your ministry. It has been a blessing to me in so many ways.
Mary Mc. in Va.
I need to learn to let go. My life is a mess; have been betrayed by family & friends, am seeking psychiatric help for depression, stopped going to church………I NEED TO RELY ON GOD again – I’m so far from where I used to be. The Let.It.Go book & study sound perfect for me. xoxo
I am a major control freak. I have some things I’m walking through right now that are making me deal with this, and boy is it hard. I am so excited to hear about this book!!
It’s amazing how you can think your the only one with this issue but its a deception.
As I sat here reading emails, searching for recipes online for the next week, planning gifts that need to go with us next week as we travel, the feelings of being overwhelmed are very strong! As always, a message from God, through a P31 devotion, tells me to stop and remember all the great things God has done for us and how He’ll get us through the next weeks and most importantly how much He loves me! Thank you P31 ladies for listening and obeying God and sharing with us how He works in your lives!
I’m excited to know I’m not alone in this endevor and feel at times I’m controlling my family, I’m excited to read LET IT GO and see what wisdom has taught Tammy to share with others. I look forward to God teaching me from this resource……
I would love to win a copy of this book! I am looking forwad to gaining some insight on Letting It Go! Definitely struggle with this. Thanks for all you ladies do!
If you were to ask just about anybody in my life to describe me, I am sure the words “control freak” would be said by most of them. However, over the years I am happy to report that compared to my younger years I am now a “control freak” with boundaries, if there is such a thing :). I have read many books that have helped me to relinquish my control to The Lord! I would love to win this book, because I know that there is always room for more learning . Thank you for the opportunity.
I am excited about this book…it may well have been written for me specifically. Winning this would be a great treat for the holidays and would really jump start some changes I know that God is encouraging me to make. I would share the second copy with my sister.
thanks!
Well since I’ve been accused of being bossy you’d think it would be easy to boss my heart around, yea not so much! Lol. Seriously I could definitely stand to Let It Go! I would keep a copy of the book for myself and give the other one to one of my girlfriends since we always talk about this kind of thing. I signed up for Karen’s Christmas challenge last week, invited my friends too as well. We all are loving it!!
Not only am I a control freak but I have a sister that is a bigger control freak than me. I am always trying to control things in my life. Everything that was mentioned: husband, kids, job, etc. I try to control it all and when it all goes haywire, I get discouraged. I know i need to give it over to God, but I just don’t know how.
I would love to have a copy of this book for myself and my sister.
This is PERFECT for the season I am in. I can tell you the day, the hour just a few weeks ago when God decided enough is enough and started to let things spin out of control in order to show me that I AM NOT IN CONTROL! I am very thankful that I know that, and have hope in Him, but it doesn’t change the fact that I have to convince myslef of it and walk in obedience to it. Ahhhhh!!!! Looking forward to your insight as I hash this one out.
I would love to win a copy of this book. I would like to share it with my small womens group at church.
I would love to win this book to help me on my journey to trusting God more and relying on me less. To help me lose the feeling of “I’m the only one who can handle it”. I also have a mom-friend who would benefit from this book. Thank you!!
Sure is encouraging to hear that other women struggle with the same things I do…. control freak, people pleasing & perfectionism!! Thanks for sharing! Would LOVE to win this book!!
I would love to win this book because I am a control freak and perfectionist…not a good combination. It causes me alot of stress as well as my loved ones. I just signed up for the 5 day challenge and have enjoyed it so far. Thank you for your words of encouragement!
My prayers this morning mirrored your blog post and the theme of your book Let.It.Go. Funny how God works those thing out… just about every day in my life! My life is a perfect storm – the trifecta of all things – teacher, step mother and no children of my own. I work each day to make sure that everyone is doing what they need to do in order for things to happen smoothly…. often losing sight of what’s important. Our family is fractured right now, partly due to my obsessive need to control every situation in my path. My intentions are so good and pure, but they are causing great strife. At school, my job is to control and run my classroom. Home is a different place and not having my own children makes it a difficult place for me to be. As I read about your book this morning I realized that this is EXACTELY where God has me right now – needing to give up that control and walk in His grace, as I extend it to those around me. I’d love to read your book and begin this journey and Let.It.Go! Bless you for sharing your heart with the rest of us!
My mother was such a great inspiration to me. She never questioned anything that she was going through during her struggle with MS and every day she thanked God for the day that He blessed her with. She has been gone now for 10 years and in the mist of all our struggles with job, school, finances, life itself I have found myself following the road of despair and pity. Then this morning after reading Renee’s devotion, “Sometimes I have to boss my heart around”, I could hear my mother’s voice saying, “Jo, be thankful for your problems and allow God to work them out. You’ve got to have faith and trust that God will handle everything because He is there during the good and the bad.” Thank you Renee for reminding me of this! I would love to be able to read Karen’s book, Let It Go, to see how to handle the stress of life through God’s Words and Wisdom and not try to handle things through my own power. Letting go is a struggle because I feel that life’s situations are man-made and should be man-handled; then if I hadn’t of handled it to begin with then I wouldn’t have found myself where I am. Thank you Renee for your devotions – they are truly part of my everyday quiet time and a must for me each and every day! God bless my mother and her Godly advice, love and support.
I was recently introduced to the 5 Day Challenge to learn to deal with the chaos at Christmas. What great insight and ideas. Life is so liberating and enjoyable when we learn to let go. I would love to have a copy of this book to read myself and to share with some other mothers trying to be the best they can be, but at the same time they are missing some if the most precious times. (Spoken by a recent empty nester!) thank you for the encouragement. Hope to use this as a Bible study at our church.
I soooooooooo needed today’s devotional. I have some heavy stuff going on in my family and with the holidays just around the corner I am feeling really blue. These issues consumed my thoughts on my commute to work this morning. I just kept telling myself that I had to trust God to intervene but some days it is so hard. It has gone on for so long that it is hard to imagine that it will ever get better. I refuse to let the devil win. I am sure your book would help renew my faith that God is in control and it will all work out in His time. Thanks for the encouragement.
I would like to win a copy for my mom. She has always been a great Christian role model and my closest friend. She is struggling with a lot of stress in her life and the other day she was saying she wished she could stop worrying. I saw that this book had come out and told her I needed to read it. She said if I got a copy should would like to read it too. I think she could benefit from the book. I thank you for the chance to win and I truly enjoy your devotionals.
The highlights of this book touch on my life situation right now and I will look for the book whether I win it or not and also I would love to have a copy for my friend who could really use the insight and encouragement as well.
Claudelle
God is good all the time. I’ve been throwing myself a bit of a pity party and self-doubt since there are job, family and health issues that are out of my control. And wow! this devotion today hits me right between the eyes and heart! Thank you for reminding me that every day God handles stuff that I cannot fathom being able to handle and it all works for the Good of God’s Plan!!! I can feel my Faith growing through these times. Would love the book!
Oh, Patti: I so like your statement: “…every day God handles stuff that I cannot fathom being able to handle and it all works for the Good of God’s Plan!!! Yes! Every day He does, and we should place
the day in His hands from the get go! Praise Him! Thank you for sharing!