I couldn’t silence the words used to describe how much I’d disappointed her.
An email filled with criticism had slipped into my inbox that week and it hurt my feelings … for days.
The shooting pain of failure, regret, and flaw-focused thinking struck like lightening through my heart.
That one email set off a storm of self-doubting emotions. It’s amazing what one person’s criticism can do.
When my children or someone criticizes me as a mom, I’ll start doubting myself as a mom. When someone criticizes me as a friend, it will doubt my ability to be a good friend. Ten people could say something nice to me or about me, but what I will remember most is that one person’s criticism. How about you?
After being tossed and turned by the winds of my people-pleasing tendencies, I finally called a friend to process my emotions and the harsh email. With wisdom she told me:
“Renee, you’ll never be perfect. And if you ever get to where you are, you will be all alone!”
Boy, she was right!
I am not perfect.
I’ll never be perfect.
And if I ever get there, I will be all alone.
Sweet friend, I don’t know if you ever feel like a failure ~ completely imperfect and full of flaws – like I do sometimes. But here is what I do know ~
Jesus was the only perfect Person to walk this earth… yet He was constantly criticized.
But, guess what? Nowhere is it recorded in scriptures that Jesus ever doubted Himself. No matter what, He stayed secure in His purpose and confident in His calling.
That day, my friend spoke reality into my reeling feelings. And God used her wisdom to reminded me: Jesus depended solely on His Father’s approval.
What His Father said {about Him} was all that mattered {to Him}. And that is what He wants for you, too.
No matter what, God loves you and He is there for you… not to criticize you but to encourage you.
- He is there in the midst of your sometimes lonely, imperfect life… when your disappointments and failures leave you empty and make you doubt your worth and purpose.
- He is there when you’re going through the motions, aware of what needs to be done but afraid you won’t be able to do it all.
- He is there when you’re criticizing yourself and questioning whether you have what it takes to be a godly woman.
He sees you. He notices all you do and He knows what you need. Today He is pursuing you with the gift of His perfect love — love that is patient and kind, love that keeps no record of your wrongs, love that won’t ever give up on you!
ENTER TO WIN
Enter to WIN my new Confident Heart Summer Devotional gift pack! It includes a copy of my A Confident Heart Devotional, a beautiful prayer journal and a Starbucks gift card!
Simply click “SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS” and do just that.
To enter to win, you must comment on my blog under this post. {All winners will be chosen from blog comments only.}
Sometimes We Need More Than a Blog Post
Do you ever feel alone or unnoticed? Need a friend to walk with you and help you see how much you are loved, pursued and created for a purpose? If so, A Confident Heart may be just the book for you!
Looking for the perfect summer devotional? Each day my new A Confident Heart Devotional: 60 Days to Stop Doubting Yourself, offers a personal, powerful and practical way to live in the security of God’s promises right where you are!
Discover more from Renee Swope
Subscribe to get the latest posts sent to your email.
Confident………..don’t know if that has ever been a part of who I am.
I have struggled with confidence for a logn time but am making progress. I now worry for a friend that is letting the criticism of others in authority over her to consume her. Someone once told me that one day you will teach what you need to learn. As I am working on my confidence in Christ I am trying to lift up my friend also and learn this together. I will be passing on this blog post to her and sharing the devotional with her if I win. Ladies, please let Christ fill up that craving for approval, not others. Oh, what peace it gives.
What a great reminder that no one is perfect, we are all sinners – and we all can be critical at times of ourselves and others. It is then when we start doubting ourselves, our purpose, our confidence. But through it all we have the ONE perfect love to help us realize we will be okay and are never alone. Thanks for the great message of inspiration and hope.
Thank you for the reminder of our security in Jesus…we can rest in his love and not be intent on our performance! Grace and peace to you!
To rest my “imperfect self” in the love of the only One who is perfect is something that I struggle with daily. It is something that I have to remind myself constantly. That He loves me – and chooses me, in all of my “imperfect-ness”, and in spite of my “imperfect-ness”, before I ever chose Him!
I struggle daily with self confidence. I get criticized by my 16 year old son about being too strict, or too nosy, or always trying to control who he hangs out with or who his friends are. I feel as if I am not a good enough Mom. I feel as if I have let God down and that I am not the Godly woman he wants me to be. I sure could use some encouragement to obtain a confident heart and seek to be that Godly woman. I can do all things through Jesus Christ who gives me strength.
The worse critic I’ve ever had is myself! I love the reminder that Jesus never doubted himself.
Thank you for the encouraging devotion.
I’m struggling….and need prayer. Not expecting to win anything. I love your blog.
Brenda,
Praying for you. My favorite preacher once said, “It’s direction not perfection.” Just don’t stop striving in the right direction.
I am always looking for approval and quite honestly not alway do I look up. Thank you for reminding me that Jesus is always there and he approves of me just because I am His.
A nice reminder that even if we were to reach perfection (which we can’t) people would still complain about something…just like they did with Jesus.
There are days . . . . and some of those days can turn into weeks. Oh, how a comment or bad experience can, and does consume my thoughts. Those ugly thoughts can grow into a feeling of despair. I just rehash the scenario over and over in my head. Forgetting the fact that God is right there waiting for me to talk to him. Waiting because he knows exactly what I am going through. He is the one constant in the equation~the one that is always there for me. Wish there was a way I could catch myself sooner. If I would simply learn to lean on Jesus a little more, I might just prevent myself from feeling so bad. Each new day is an opportunity for growth ~ glad I am learning to lean on Jesus a little more 🙂
Wonderful devotion today. Each day as I read P31 devotions I am reminded of the love GOD has for me .
The words from strong Christian women like yourself are the extra encouragement I need each day.
Thank you!
These were the exact words I needed to hear this morning. Feeling very alone and listening to all the doubtful, critical thoughts running rampantly through my mind. I so badly needed to be reminded of the One who truly loves me and will never leave me. Thank you!!
It’s crazy how those hurtful thoughts go in our minds and bounce around, always reminding us that we are less than what Christ made us to be. Guard your heart and release those thoughts & do not allow them to consume you. You do have a choice. I wil be praying for you, Debbie.
I believe this book would benefit my daughter and I. we both struggle with confidence and realizing that God loves us no matter what we have done.Sometimes I notice it is hard for my daughter to take in the good things people say about her, she is always leaning towards the negativity. I love reading your messages they help me daily. It always seems God knows what I need at that exact moment
After 29 years of striving to please God in my Christian life, He got me attention.
Shortly thereafter, my handful of close friends were gone, all too busy even for email communication. I fought at first, it hurts. They all had careers and went back to work. I am an older mom with young teens and no college Education. BUT, I believe my Father allowed this for the best reason. As I am going through a healing process from a traumatic life prior to Christ, He loves me so much He allowed them to go, so HE can be my one and only. I did not know what that looked like, and so he is showing me. It’s a journey that will take time, but I am now surrendered and welcome it, even when painful. I trust What He is doing in my life, even through the painful, lonely moments. Now I see He sends me to the strangers and acquaintances whenHe deems the time is right. I have to ask every day, what do You want me to do with this day. He always answers.
“Jesus was the only perfect Person to walk this earth… yet He was constantly criticized.” I love this!! Even if I was perfect I would still be criticized. It’s difficult not to care what others think but in light of this that just seems silly. Really struggling in my marriage right now…trying to lean into who God says I am.
I felt the same way when I read that line. Truth is, criticism is their problem, not yours. It doesn’t matter much what you do, there will always be some one to criticize.
I can relate to hearing ten good things and one criticism and only hearing the criticism. Often that criticism comes from my own thoughts or feelings about myself. I know I need to work on hearing God’s truth about who I am and who He is creating me to be. At times this process is so overwhelming I fear I’ve lost sight of Him or I struggle to hear Him through the noise of life and my head. But it is in spending moments with Him each morning that I am reminded that this is His plan not mine and He is guiding me and it will all be alright as long as I can refocus my eyes on Him.
Thank you so much, the devotion and blog was just what I needed today. I needed to be reminded that God not only always faithful, but he pursues me, loves me beyond measure, just as I am, this imperfect girl with all my faults and failures. He is all that I need. Blessings.
What a “timely” blessing from your devotional, Renee! I am feeling so worn out and discouraged on this journey when I walk by myself. Jesus IS with me to encourage and not to criticize.