It had been a really terrible, awful, hard day. So hard that I sat and cried. And yet, it brought me to the end of myself. And that was a good thing.
When I finished crying, I sat down to do some work and happened upon a story about Andrew Carnegie that completely changed my perspective as a mom and as a child of God.
Andrew Carnegie was the wealthiest man in America in the early 1900s, so wealthy that he employed over 42 millionaires. When asked how he developed these men to become so valuable that he would pay them that much money, Carnegie explained that “men are developed the same way gold is mined. When gold is mined, several tons of dirt must be moved to get an ounce of gold, but one doesn’t go into the mine looking for dirt — one goes in looking for gold.”
I’d been buried in the dirt that day. I was lost in the monotony of motherhood and felt like my days had no meaning. My discouragement and feelings of failure as a mom left me so disappointed in myself. And I was convinced God felt the same way about me.
I started wishing I had a gold-miner in my life who could see beyond my mistakes and find the gold in me. That’s when God whispered to my heart, “Renee, I am that gold-miner. You are the one who is so critical of yourself. You are the one who focuses on your faults. But I see the gold of My image in your heart, and I want to bring it to the surface so your kids can see Me in you.”
As I sat there trying to process what God was whispering to my heart, stories from the Bible started flooding my thoughts helping me believe that God really does see beyond who I am to who I can become.
That day God used His thoughts to give me a new perspective – of Himself and of myself. Then He challenged me to look for ways to transfer that perspective to my children.
It’s easy to get buried in the dirt of discontentment, disobedience and discouragement. You may even be thinking, Where’s the gold in it all? I wondered, too. But after reading Carnegie’s story and hearing God speak to my heart, I wanted to become a gold-mining mom.
As I thought about the gold I wanted to see in my children, character traits of Christ such as patience, kindness and contentment came to mind. I decided to make a list of golden attitudes and actions and look up Bible verses we could learn together. Then I made gold nuggets by balling up foil and spray-painting them gold.
In the following weeks, each time my kids showed a golden attitude or action, I’d reward them. When they saved up enough nuggets, they’d get a special treat. We also found new character traits and Bible verses, wrote down ideas to live them out and started making them part of our family devotions.
It took time for me to embrace a grace-based parenting perspective and let God’s new truths sink in. But I was so excited about having a spiritual focus as a mom. I started getting creative and about finding time in the midst of my busy days to get into His Word and get His word into me. And as I did, He used His thoughts to re-shape mine.
God’s Word became a part of our everyday lives as He taught me to take my eyes off of my children’s habits and focus on their hearts. Not only did it change my kids’ attitudes and actions, it changed me, too. For the first time in months, I was excited about my role as a parent. God had given me a new perspective, and a whole new sense of purpose as a mom!
Lord, thank You for not focusing on the dirt in my life but seeing beyond who I am to who I can become. Help me believe that, receive that and give it away to my kids, my husband and my friends. Help me look at their hearts and encourage the glimpses of You that I see in them. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
Portions of this post are in my book, A Confident Heart.
Copyright 2011. Baker Publishing. All rights reserved.
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Renee – thank you so much for your thoughts today! I am a grandma – my 3 daughers have given me 7 grandchildren ranging from 11yrs to 5 months. My 2 youngest daughters have the toddlers and are feeling what you felt and what I felt when I was that age. They would so benefit from your gift. Just last week one called me at 11:00 at night in tears because she felt she was a failure with her 3 year old. They are so open to God's will in there lives as mothers and wives but the daily stess of knowing what to do to bless their children is a struggle. I would say the small gobible would be their choice so they could easily listen while exercising and walking.
you have always been a blessing to me and I am always passing your devotions on to my girls and friends.
Becky I of ohio
Thank you for this devotion. Exactly what I needed to hear today. I would like the GoBible Voyager. What a great tool! Thanks again for your encouraging words today.
Oops- Barb is : [email protected]
OOps forgot to add that I would give the other one to my sister mom of my beautiful 4 year old niece, she would love it.
Thank you for the transparency into your struggles. As a Mom of 4 children, ranging from a 10 year old tween girl to a 6 month old boy, I can say that I have fallen to my knees many times crying out that I cannot do this!!
He has filled me with such grace, joy, love, patience and rest as I continue to seek Him. I would love the GoBible Voyager because I am always on the go! I would give the other one to my sister who is just coming into a relationship with the LORD. Thank you!
[email protected]
I so needed to hear this devotion today! While not ready to quit, I've certainly been feeling stagnant and inadequate as a mom, lately. If I won I'd like the GoBible Voyager and I'd give the other copy to my neighbor who is a stay at home mom of two, that doesn't have access to many resources! Thanks!
Jennifer
The Voyager, what an amazing idea the GOBible! Love it!!
I am so excited to share your message w/ my 2 young mom daughters(1 is my daughter in law)! They so need to see your golden nugget idea & see how your pink slip turned into YOUR GOLDEN ticket- a surrender slip to God!
I really needed your devotion today! I have been feeling like such a failure as a mother lately and am so overwhelmed that I just want to stop everything because I don't know where to begin! You gave me hope that it doesn't have to be that way if I ask for God's help. That is the first thing I'm going to do today! 🙂
On a side note, I'd love the voyager go-bible and would give the second pack to my Mom, who is a great encouragement to me and inspiration.
[email protected]
Thank you so much for this devotional. I had my "i quit" moment this morning with my 3 children ages 6, 5, and 2 1/2 , and then opened up my email to find this devotional waiting for me. Thank you Lord! 🙂
If chosen i would love the GOBIBLE Voyager. (Honestly they all look awesome! ) I would send the second one to my college friend Meredith who lives in another town, but has been such an encouragement in raising Godly children and putting the Lord first in everything. Most importantly capturing our children's hearts for the Lord.
Thanks again for sharing your thoughts, insights, and struggles as a mom.
[email protected]
Thanks! Morgan
The Lord is so wonderful and amazing. Not ONE HOUR ago I proclaimed to my 3 children (that I homeschool) that "I quit". Once again, our morning had been started off with squabbles, fights and tears. I had had it!!
Wouldn't you know that your devotion was the one in my inbox soon after. Love the timing! Thanks for the encouragement 🙂
Thank you so much for the encouragement. I have two wonderful teenage daughters that I love dearly, but on so many occasions feel like I don't measure up when interacting with them. Sunday evening was an especially difficult time that when it was all over everyone was in tears. Many regrets over the way I discipline and express my needs/wants for them. If I were so blessed to be selected, I would love to have the GoBible Voyager to help me with my mothering and life journey. I would give the 2nd one to my dear sister who is severly strugging with drug and alcohol dependency. While she has been in rehab, her poor tween daughters are feeling abandoned, lost and rebellious. I pray something like this bible would provide hope, guidance and peace for her recovey and that of her children. May God Bless you for providing such inspiration to all of the struggling moms out there! Happy Mother's Day to you!
Thank you so much for your word today. I needed that. I struggle the most with my 16-year-old daughter. We have the classic mother/daughter issue. She thinks she knows everything. I know she doesn't! But I've been praying that I have patience to wait out these years. I hear on the other side can be a wonderful mother/daughter relationship. Just hoping I don't kill her before then 🙂
I would love to have the GoBible Voyager. I travel quite a bit and it would get me through the times when the traveling becomes so weary mostly because I'm away from my husband and children. I would give the second one to my best girlfriend (I didn't say best friend because my husband is my best friend). She, too, struggles with motherhood. Her son is a freshman in college. It's hard for her to let him go but also still be around for when he needs his mommy. Together she and I pray about being better mothers. We pray about relying on God and not giving into our worries. She's my prayer partner and sister in this battle to become good Christian mothers.
[email protected]
Just what I needed today! Mother of two under three and ready for number three to arrive any day…thinking I don't have the strength to do any of this on my own! And how often have I been in that situation comparing the others "outside" to my "inside". Would enjoy the GoBible Voyager. Would love to give other package to a friend who is facing difficult circumstance in own life and also has three on her own. Thanks for the encouragement!
No matter my prayer this morning or my defeat for the day, your blog is exactly waht I need that day. Thank you for letting God speak through you.
Vanessa
I so remember those days. Our kids are now grown & have little ones of their own. I think I would give both of the GoBibles Voyager away. One to our neice who's 26 & just found out she's loosing her eye sight. It's hereditary but she has it worse than other family members. The 2nd one I'd give to my friend Kandy that has gotten away from our church. Thanks again for the chance to reach others. Peg J. R.
I was so touched by today's devotional! I have been at that exact place in my parenting years and have cried because I knew I couldn't quit. I had a very attached nursing baby who didn't sleep for more than 3 hours for an entire year and also a 2 year old. God has recently told me that I can't Be a great mom in my own strength but through Him. This was such confirmation to me! Thank you! I would love To win a voyeger go bible for myself and an original I would give to my accountability partner and best friend who is a mom in the exact same season as me. Thank you for your ministry!!
I recently discovered Proverbs 31 and love it! My life has been turned upside down over the past year and everything I thought was stable and perfect was really very unstable and imperfect! I am so blessed to have two boys. Sammy 3 and Bobby 13 months! They are my life, but I sometimes feel like I am not good at being a mother! I am at times feel like I do not give them enough of myself. I don't want to let them down and I pray that they will find Jesus early and live their lives in his name. I want to teach them this and show them the peace he brings! Through this past year my eyes have been opened and I now know I AM NOT IN CONTROL of anything! I really appreciate the encouragement! I recently started working with underpriviledged and troubled children in our local school. This has really opened my eyes and I love my job. However, it limits my time for other obligations and necessary tasks. I feel I would benefit from the GOBIBLE in many ways. I enjoy learning and studying my Bible and need to work more into my schedule. I could listen to this as I ride the bus to school or on my way home. It would be very beneficial for me! I would give the other to my sister. She is also raising two boys and works long hours. She has an interest in Bible studies but often is not able to attend.
Thank you. I really needed your encouragement today. I am a 49 year old mother of 2 young kids ages 6 & 9 and sometimes I feel overwhelmed. I would love the NIV version of the Voyager GoBible and I would give the 2nd pack to my younger sister who has 2 boys ages 2 & 4. Her husband has been out of work for 2 years and has been attending college full-time, while she is working full-time. They really struggle to make ends meets financially and emotional their are still dealing with loss of their little girl who was still-born in September 2010. If I win, my email address is: [email protected]
I'd pick the Original GoBible. I'd give the second one to my best friend, a very busy pastor's wife & mom.