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Renee Swope

Encouraging and equipping moms to parent with God's grace and confidence.

Read An Excerpt: Chapter 1 & 2

Confident Heart Friendship Gift Pak

“Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another…”
Hebrews 10:25a

I sometimes wonder if I am one of the “some” that are mentioned in this verse. Oh I go to church. I worship, take notes and hang out in the lobby chit-chatting. But somewhere along the way I got “in the habit of not meeting together” with friends as much as I think God wants me to.

I didn’t mean for it to happen. Each day just seemed to fade into another. I couldn’t keep up with everything as a wife, mom, friend, daughter, neighbor, and working/ministering woman.

Time with friends was the one thing I could afford to miss. Or so I thought.

But then I found myself with an craving for connection that I was trying to fulfill with a white screen and black alphabet keys. Yet no matter how many times I checked email or Facebook, it was never enough to satisfy my craving.

Maybe you can relate. If so, be sure to read my “Craving Connection” devotion over at Encouragement for Today.

As I think about my craving for connection, and God’s emphasis on the importance of us “meeting together,” I can’t help but believe it’s because He created us to need it. We were created in His image after all, and God is always in community – Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Always has been.

But it won’t just happen because we need it. So, today I wanted to share a few ways we can get creative and intentional about spending time with friends:

  • Plan a monthly girl’s night out
  • Invite a friend over for lunch or coffee
  • Find a hobby you both enjoy
  • Get away together for a day or weekend
  • Carpool together
  • Run errands together
  • Clean your houses or do laundry together
  • Prepare dinner together
  • Serve someone in need together
  • Reach out to a neighbor together
  • Start a Bible study or book club together

One of the things that encourages me is to have spiritual purpose to my friendships. I love doing a book study with a friend and meeting to talk about the questions at the end of each chapter.

I wrote A Confident Heart with that in mind, hoping friends will read it and encourage each other with the truths God put in it. We need that spiritual encouragement and transparency in our friendships, don’t we? So, this week I’m giving A Confident Heart Friendship gift pak away to one of you. Here is what it includes:

Confident Heart Friendship Gift Pak

One advanced copy of my new book A Confident Heart
to read and share with a friend.

$10 Starbuck’s Gift Card to share with a friend while you connect face-to-face and heart-to-heart over coffee, tea or dessert.

To enter to win — share this post with your friends via Facebook, Twitter, your blog and email. Let me know you did and then tell me one friend you will encourage with a call today or an email letting them know you’d love to get together. I’ll announce the winner next Monday.

Lord, You created us with a need for friends. Yet, we find ourselves rushing through our days with little time for face-to-face and heart-to-heart connections. Help us to seek You first as our ultimate Friend, and then reach out to others so we can have and be a close friend. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.


This post is part of my Encouraging Words Wednesday.

Comments

  1. You have spoken my truth right here. I so deeply want to connect with my friends face to face. I've re-posted to Facebook and I'll be emailing my friend today to set up a coffee date!

  2. Hello Renee: thank you so much for this devotional. This was also me that you were talking about. To the point that I decided to take a break from Facebook because I saw how it replacing my face to face interactions with my friends. God has given me a wonderful friend named Nerd. We are growing our friendship at this time with monthly breakfast meetings but I have to tell you that I am so refreshed spiritually, emotionally and even physically when I get together with her. Thank you for this post and perhaps I will get a chance at winning your gift pak. If not I am sure that a very deserving lady will get it. Love,Silvia Arvelo

  3. I am so glad that I found your blog. I have been reading about friendships and feel that God is talking to me. I know that I crave that interaction in my life. I tend to go onine to connect but I think that's because I don't feel connected in person. I would like to improved that. Yesterday I called a friend and even though we can't see each other face-to-face, it was a lot better than online 🙂 Today I made lunch plans next week with an "old" group of friends. Thank you for encouraging me!

  6. Laura Fenton Karn I shared your giveaway on my facebook page!! Thanks for your devotional. It smacked me in the face as I am a big time email and facebook watcher. I hope to get to talk face to face to at least one friend tonight! Most of the time, my face to face conversations are only one or two days a week if I get to see someone at church. I really need to change that.

  8. I would love to win this! I put it out on Facebook this morning.

    I have a friend that is in recovery, and has been doing well, but has recently stopped attending church, is struggling financially and in her marriage. I know she could use more face to face time with friends that will life her up.

  9. I shared this with all of my facebook friends and I would love to read this book. I can identify with checking e-mail and facebook several times a day and not taking enough time to get together face to face with those who matter the most to me. I sent an email to my friend and told her we need to get together really soon. Thank you for being such an inspiration.

  10. Funny…just this morning I was thinking about how much I want to get together with a friend….any friend….and have some face-to-face, heart-to-heart talk! I am so overwhelmed at my job and working extra hours and it seems there are so many people pulling at me all day and then feeling like I have no time for myself. I'm going to do my best to make time for a friend…sadly, it probably won't be until next week! (See there…just an example of how my weeks go!) 🙂

  11. You really hit the nail on the head for me today. I do find myself checking email and FB more often than I should some days… and I definitely feel that craving for connection… but I didn't put it together that they are so directly related until you said it. I shared your blog on FB and I do have a friend that I chit-chat with briefly at church and we keep saying we should get together- I am going to call her today and set a date! Thanks! God Bless!

  12. Thank you for this devotional.. I can't tell you the last time I took time to spend some face to dace time with a friend! WIth 6 kids, I always tell myself there is too much to do! No more! I shared this post on my FB fan page, and will be calling another homeschool mom that is just as busy as I, to spend some time over coffee!

  13. I have posted on my blog and on FB. The interesting thing that I got from this devotional is that it's my husband that suffers the most from my time fraternizing with my online friends. I have some amazing online friends, and they deserve time too. But no one in my life deserves more attention and friendship than my hubby of 27 years. I vow to turn the computer off while he is at home and give that time to him.

    Sam

  14. Almighty God I Am Trying So Hard.
    God Do YOU Still Love Me?
    I Feel So Lost.
    I Do Good And Try So Hard.
    Almighty God I Need YOUR Love.
    Thanks. Laurie
    Laurie Ann

  15. Thank you for this timely message and such a wonderful giveaway! 🙂 I shared the giveaway on fb and I accept your challenge to reconnect with my best friend Rachele back home, I miss the times we used to share together since I've moved away 🙁

    [email protected]

  16. Wow thank you so much for this blog..It is easy to cut out face-to face relationships because of technology advances. I find myself checking emails often as well. Thank you for the challenge to get together with a friend 🙂

  17. I'm sending this to another homeschooling mom I know…you were right on! I check my email all the time~and it's because I MISS face to face time with friends. Thank You! ~Lyn

  18. Hi, I just posted this on FB. I called my friend Rachel to see if she'd like to go yard saling with me on Friday, and it looks like it may just work out! Yay! Saling is so much better with a good friend! 🙂 Thanks for the encouragement!

  20. Sent this via email to my best friend who is coming into town this weekend for my birthday. It is always good for us to unplug from our daily responsibilities and reconnect, share our heart's concerns and lean on eachother's friendship. She is such a blessing to me and I was immediately prompted to share this devotional message with her.
    Thank you!
    Lori

  21. Renee, I so love when you are on the Proverbs daily email. This is so what I needed today. I emailed Becky and we are getting together this weekend. Love and miss you. Jen

  22. Ohhhh, thank you. So many times, the P31 daily devotion seems as it were written just for me, and today seems to be no different. I, sometimes almost compulsively, am often seeking that "connection" with frequent checks on FB (made worse with the smart phone and having FB at my fingertips). Life is often so hectic and busy, home with 3 kids and their busy schedules, that sometimes the last thing I want to do when I have "free" (haha) time is get on the phone to chat. But, it's becoming apparant that it's that very connection with my friends that is missing in my life.
    I thank God for leading me to a MOPS group, and the many meaningful connections I've been able to make with other ladies in my veryseason, and other seasons, of life.
    I've shared this post on FB, with a challege to my friends to reach out and make a special connction of their own today. I will be reaching out myself today to a dear friend who I haven't seen in several months.

  23. I posted this on facebook and will email to a few friends. This speaks directly to me. It seems like when I have time no one else is available. Life is tough sometimes on relationships. I have felt convicted about my time on computer and establishing some boundaries so this is very timely. God is always on time and this time worked through you! Thank you! I will call a friend today and set up a time even if it is weeks away. Blessings–Cathy

  24. God is so awesome in how He helps us to see the errors in our lives thru valued friendships. Thank you Renee for that important reminder! Proverbs 27:9 Ointment and perfume delight the heart, and the sweetness of a man's friend does so by hearty counsel. Angelique

  25. Oh, Renee, it's so true we women crave connections, don't we?! I would LOVE to win an advanced copy of your book. Very eager to read it! I shared a link to this post on the Rise & Shine facebook page and on my own facebook. I have 3 friends that came to mind after reading your post. I want to contact two of them today, one by phone and one by e-mail. 🙂 Thanks for the nudge!!

  26. When I read your devotion this a.m. I immediately forwarded it to my friend, Tamera, and put MUST READ in the subject line. We met for lunch yesterday and discussed MTC regarding computers and food. She is doing MTC this summer with a Bible study group (I did it online in January) but I would like to do it with her again We could be accountablity partners since we live in the same neighborhood and could alternate coffee dates.
    Jane

  27. Oh, I forgot to say in my earlier post that I will call and encourage my friend Rebecca today. She has refused to join the Facebook craze. I appreciate this about her. She is a true friend and a faitful woman of God. I would love to treat her to a cup of coffee if I am selected the winner of the gift pack. Her family is enduring hard times and has been for more than three years now. She is an amazing woman the way she just keeps going forward and lets the bad in the world shrug off her shoulders.

  28. Your devotional has encouraged me this morning! Before I checked my email and read it, I had just re-connected with an old friend over the phone and discussed how so many of today's menas of communication keep us up-to-date on the happenings of one another's lives, but lack the connecting of the heart. We promised to get together soon, and that desire for face-to-face time was confirmed when I read this. God knows what we need and has just the right timing! Like so many women, I get too busy and don't make enough time to spend with those special friends who are so dear to my heart. I will take time out to get together this week with my friend I talked to this morning and have already shared the devotional with several friends through email! Thank you for your ministry!
    Jen

  29. An exceptional Devotion. Thanks so much. It reinforces what I just told my friend who took me to lunch for my Birthday. That meant more to me than all my internet birthday wishes put together.
    Ann

  30. Bless you, Renee. I posted this in the Notes section of my Facebook account so many could read your tender and insightful words.

    This topic is painfully close to my heart but for a different reason: I have always taken the time for personal, face-to-face connections, but about 18 months ago or so I found myself in a space in this world where all my girlfriends who lived locally were "too busy" to get togehter. No matter that I called each one ever few weeks to see if their schedule had freed up. No matter that I faithfully did this for 6-9 months while I got rejection after rejection. This created a huge amount of grief and loss in my life.

    I called on God to take my pain away and, since then, I have called on him to bring new friendships into my life. My expectations were too high, I guess. Even "good Christian" women are human and sin.

    Being "in the desert" like this has helped me see some of the human loneliness Jesus experienced and it has helped me to turn to God in all things and at all times. But, as you pointed out, God made us for human connections too, so I am trying to find forgiveness in my heart and I've asked God to give me courage to trust and build new friendships and relationships.

    I am so grateful for the insights God gives you and the courageous, tranparent way in which you are gifted with sharing these with others. Thank you and God bless you.

  31. Good Morning Renee,

    The person that I forwarded the devotion to and would like to reconnect with is my husband. I have been a grouchy wife this week and forgot all about the joy and friendship with shared over our anniversary weekend.

    La Lu N Be Blessed

    Robin L.

  32. I think that devotional spoke directly to me! I am so guilty. I feel like I have not friends due to the quick email here and there, or at least no face-to-face friends. Thank you Renee for the reminder of what friends are really for. Now I feel like I need a hug from a friend!!
    I am putting your post on my blog http://www.myfaithfulliving.com and the "Confident Heart Friendship Gift Pack". Thank you for the opportunity and I can't wait for the book!!

  33. Yikes! I was quite convicted when I read your devotional this morning! We've been thinking about getting rid of our internet on our phone, but I've been resistant because I think I "need" to be overly connected via media. Sigh. Anyway, I posted your contest & blog post on Facebook. (I tagged P31 so you can find it.)

  34. Hi Renee,

    I posted the link on my facebook page and also sent the link to my dear friend. She has been a tremendous inspiration to me, in so many ways. While I was writing my manuscript, every day she encouraged me to keep writing, and told me how much she was enjoying it. She rejoiced with the milestones – completing a certain amount of words, bringing flowers, sending cards, etc. She also has helped me through the rough times I've been experiencing. She's a little further along on the journey in some areas, so she reaches back for me, telling me I can make it. I praise God for bringing us together. She means so much to me.

    Blessings,
    Jodie Wolfe
    digging4pearls(at)comcast(dot)net

  35. I've posted on Facebook! How true these words are. I can tell when I need some girl time… I start to get grouchy and begin checking facebook or blogs too much. It's the personal touch that I need more. Facebook and blogs are a great outreach, but not enough to satisfy that deep longing.

    I get to see a great friend today. We've been trying to walk 3 days a week together! I love that time we share. Another friend I spoke with on the phone yesterday–she lives in Up State NY… but there's a chance to see her in May!

    There is a woman I'm getting to know from another Meeting House my daughter and I attend on Wednesday night. I get the feeling she's a true 'soul' sister in everyway for me. Our Spirits and personalities just click! I love when that happens. I would share the gift with her because from a recent conversation I can tell she'd LOVE LOVE LOVE your book as much as I do!

  36. Thank you for your honesty and insight Renee. This was me to an extreme and still is to some degree. God shined his light on my craving too a little less than a year ago but I wasn't sure what to do with it. Your action step is so clear and easy. Thank you!! I am calling a friend to have lunch with me today whom I believe struggles with the same craving for real relationship. I will definitely forward your Proverbs 31 devotion to many of my friends. Thank you!

  37. I will share this with a girlfriend and tell her how much I value our friendship and time together. I too check Facebook when I have that friend craving.

  38. Confident heart? Now there's something I could use! I have many acquaintances but very few close friends…maybe none. I have tried to reach out but it is difficult to find (as Anne of Green Gables says) "a kindred spirit"…I have also been coming out of some situations with messed boundaries and am fearful to trust. I have also found that many women that I know are "good" with shallow relationships, not so many want anything very deep.

    Please pray for me, that I might grow in my confidence in the LORD first and that my heart might become a confident one…so I can reach out with the love of Christ to love and be loved.

    CJ

  39. Your post was very enlightening today…thanks! I'm sharing it in emails with friends. However, I am also very thankful for sending and receiving emails since I moved 1800 miles away last July. It has been such a blessing to remain connected with dear friends during this time of transition.

  41. It is so easy to turn on a machine and look for companionship from an e-mail. We need to strive for real conversation and to make time for visiting our friends. I plan to call my Aunt Sharon in Virginia this week and just talk. Maybe we can arrange a lunch when she comes up to MD. She is a fan of Proverbs 31 too.
    Cheryl

  43. I loved your post over on Prov 31 today..reminds me it's okay to crave time with my girlfriends in the midst of investing time in the rest of my life! Today I'm meeting up with a friend to have breakfast and I want to put together a care package for my best friend who is finishing up college since we can't hang out 🙂

  44. Renee,
    Your devotional really hit home today.I truly miss seeing my friends face to face. I am making a point today to call one of them and see if we can get together. All of our lives are so busy, but we need to purposely carve out time for this. Thank you for the reminder…

  45. Good Morning Renee! Thank you for a beautiful post and your devotion was absolutely what I needed and went hand in hand with what has been weighing on my heart since last night! I was thinking about you yesterday when I heard you on KLove yesterday morning, and was delighted to see a post on my feed this morning! I tweeted your giveaway and mentioned you in it (@kmstreeter12509), I don't have a facebook but if I did it would totally be on there. I mentioned it in this blog post: http://bit.ly/frxRdL – as well as, e-mailed a couple of friends and family to share.

    Last night I was just thinking about how much I crave some time with a girl friend sitting, drinking coffee and catching up on life. It's one of my absolute favorite things to do, however, haven't done it in quite a while. But it's something I just need. So, I'll be calling up a friend today, one that God picked out just for me 6 years ago at a church conference and we have been best friends ever since. Have a blessed day Renee!

  46. Your devotional today is so meaningful to me and such a good reminder. I will share it via email. I also commit to reaching out to my friend Carolyn in person.

  47. I'm a single child so from an early age I began acknowledging the value of good friendships. Those precious friends have played the role of sisters and they are dear to my heart.
    When I left my country of origin that was one of the toughest things, leaving friends behind.
    Little did I know that 4 years later, my best friend also left the country and now we live minutes apart from each other. I always say that the Lord has spoiled me that much!

  48. What an insightful post! Of course Jesus had friends, I just never thought of it that way! I moved to another state 8 years ago and have slowly let my closest friendship dwindle away. I'm going to send her this post and call her today 🙂 Thanks so much for nudging me to make that connection. Have a blessed day!

  49. I don't do facebook but I will share the message contained in your devotional on P31 with a good friend who is so busy caring for a sick family member that she doesn't take time to connect with firends and I am going to urge her to take that time for us again. We need to share the hard times as well as the good times and just pray together if that is what she needs. Donna [email protected]

  50. Your devotional was challenging on many levels! I was challenged to email an old friend I seem to have lost contact with, hoping to meet up soon; emailed new friends I'm going to be getting together with over breakfast; and emailed colleagues I hope to become even better friends with.
    And yes, we can't get enough of meeting up with friends, as far as I'm concerned (http://wordsfromgodfortoday.blogspot.com/2011/04/friends.html)

    And it was also challenging to respond in so many electronic forms! It was quite an effort, but I managed to link on facebook, Twitter, the blog AND email! Phew! Now I have figured out how to put a link on facebook, I thought the idea of ArmyMomx2 of posting a link to all your devotionals was just brilliant!