(Chapter 6) Don’t Throw Away Your Confidence

Our word for Chapter 6 is HIS
Download and print a PDF file or in a MSWord file. Post it everywhere so you can remember YOU ARE a HIS – He has redeemed you and called you by name. You belong to HIM!

God’s promise for this week:
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name; you are Mine!” Isaiah 43:1b (NAS)

Do you ever feel inadequate and insecure? We have an enemy who is good at getting us to believe we’re not good enough and don’t have what it takes to be used by God. But we don’t have to let him trash us the way he does! Today we’ve got another IMPORTANT video message you don’t want to miss! It is one of my favorites!!

{Download “Video Message Notes” in a PDF or in MSWord just for you. }

{Download “Don’t Throw Away Your Confidence” printable.}


Today’s Assignments: Print and post your Chapter 6 word and verse. Pray our Chapter 6 prayer and start {or continue} reading chapter 6.

“Share Your Thoughts” about Chapter 6 and today’s video below.

Mark your calendar for next Tuesday night at 8pm EST!
I’m offering a FREE Confident Heart Conference Call!  And after the call, I’ll be hosting a Facebook Party at 9pm EST! That way we can chat about the call, have a Q&A, connect with each other and win fun prizes!

I’ll post details about the conference call Tuesday on my blog next Monday.
And, be sure to “LIKE” my Confident Heart Facebook page to be part of the FB party!

About Renee

Renee Swope is a Word-lover, story-teller, heart-encourager and grace-needer. She's also a wife, mom, friend, daughter and author of A Confident Heart, a Retailers Choice Award winning book that became a best-seller and has been published in six languages, with over 150,000 copies sold. Renee is speaks around the country at women's events and and serves on the writing team for DaySpring’s inCourage blog. For twenty years, Renee served in leadership at Proverbs 31 Ministries and as former co-host of the ministry's radio program, “Everyday Life with Lysa & Renee.


  1. I absolutely loved chapter 6, especially the verses and the need to strengthen myself with what God says about me. I enjoyed reading the story for Renee’s fiancé, it is a sobering lesson to remember that we cannot find fulfillment in people. I also liked the way she pointed out that Eve’s fall into temptation began with a stumble over doubt.

    There are too many negative voices telling us that we are not good enough. I heard so little praise growing up that silence usually meant that I could have done better. Nowadays, even seeing others’ success makes me wonder what is wrong with me that I can’t have what they have. But that is not God’s will, He did not go to the cross so I could wonder what is wrong with me. Instead, He wants me to rest in the fullness of His promise and love, and be made right with Him. So nothing is wrong with me because of His strength!

    • I love reading your comments, Julie ~ I am so happy that you have found strength in God, especially having grown up with so little encouragement. You are also so supportive to the rest of this group. My best friend’s name is Julie and she brought me closer to God. Lovely coincidence.

      Blessings ~ Maureen

      • Me too. I love seeing Julie’s sweet face and hearing her thoughts 🙂

        Maureen, thank you for your kindness and encouraging words too!

    • Please help me ladies, where do I go for me to be able to read the chapters on email.

    • Julie: Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts on Chapter 6. I especially like: ” He did not go to the cross so I could wonder what is wrong with me. Instead, He wants me to rest in the fullness of His promise and love, and be made right with Him. So nothing is wrong with me because of His strength!” Wow! May we grasp this and run with it. God bless you!

    • Julie:

      It is amazing to know the number of people who also call themselves children of God are speaking negative words over each other. I am currently enduring this painful process on my job and it has broken my spirit down. I have to remind myself who I belong to and who really loves me and that is Jesus Christ. I haven’t been posting but have read the book previously and am rereading it with all of you and I have to tell you I thought I was all alone in this walk with doubt. I know that God says “I can do all things through Him who strengthens me and I know I am capable of doing many things, but the negative voices crowd my mind and my heart and I feel so discouraged. Thank all of you for being strong in your journey through this study, it is helping me to lift up my head and look to the hills for that is where I will find help through the Lord.

  2. This chapter spoke to me. The first question about an area that I struggle would be work. I’m a special ed teacher. This is only my 2nd year and both years have looked different. I don’t feel confident that I know what I am to be doing. I don’t know that I do it well when I do my job. I even put a resume somewhere else to test the water. I know this was a job given to me by God. Nothing about the way I got this job was normal.I see God’s hand in the entire situation. When days are long and hard and I feel that I can’t please anyone with any decision, I begin to doubt everything about my ability to do this job. I am currently questioning if I misheard God when he led me to where I am. I don’t know whether to stay or go. If I stay, how do I do the best job possible? How do I best serve these children? I know I can’t make everyone happy but man, it is tough when you feel all are against you!

    I am privileged to work with many Christians. We can share our cares. We lift each other up. We use “God’s got this” a lot. I have some verses and prayers posted in my work area. I try to remember that I’m a child of the King. I should live like one. I should copy the Am/FMs on 113-114 and post them to remind myself!

    Thanks for listening! I know I can overcome this with God’s help. I just need to stay close to HIM!

    • By obeying God, you are already doing the best job possible. When I was serving in ministry, I had to come to terms with the fact that I simply cannot please everyone. Then I realized that there was only One whom I had to please, and as long as I did that, the other problems don’t matter so much. Tuning out the complaints of others can be hard, but I pray that you will be able to hear from God each day, especially when you feel that everything is against you. Just remember, the world is against Him too, but He is willing to fight for you. Thank you for sharing and God bless!

    • Im going to be sharing a PDF with our AM/FM thoughts next week 🙂

    • Thanks ladies! I know things in my head. My heart needs to listen!

    • Michelle Lopez says:

      Be confident that you are TRYING!! Teaching is very difficult these days. I have been teaching for 22 years and this year I too have LOST my confidence. It is easy for me to tell you to be confident but I have a lot of trouble believing that for myself. Renee’s book has helped me however I struggle hour to hour with confidence. This is the first year confidence has ever been a problem at work. I read your story as I was about to start crying due to the difficult day without confidence I have had. I just wanted you to know that your story helped me and I wanted to give you a word of encouragement.:)

    • I too do some teaching with special ed 16 -60 it is tough but it helps me when I remember that it is not their fault, that God loves them and if God has given us this work to do He will give us all the strength and resources we need – guaranteed by His promises. Stay positive- you are likely to be one of the few positive influences in each of these children’s lives. Keep getting the streams of living water each day from scripture and remember it can take 10,000 hours to become an expert at anything worthwhile – and some of us are slow learners so it may take even longer but God has asked us to persevere and perseverance …..

      3 Not only so, but we[c] also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4 perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5 And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us rRomans ch 5

  3. Renee, I am pretty sure you wrote Chapter 6 especially for me!!! I struggle with not being good enough way too often. Your story about your failed engagements pointed out very clearly that I need to work on not depending on my fiance’ for my happiness and fulfillment. Thank you so much for listing the “comeback” scriptures for when I hear those whispers of doubt, fear, worry, anxiety! I have read and heard about Jesus’ confrontation with Satan during those forty days in the desert and thought “I wish I knew scriptures that well so I could know what to say back”. This book is striking nerves each day and pointing out new and more in-depth portions of my life that I need to turn over to God and work on with His intervention. I am praying and expecting many more revelations to come!

    • I love what you shared Mindy!! Im so encouraged to know that God is using my broken places and all that He’s given me, taught me, and set me free from to lead women like you into the depths and freedom of His unfailing love!

  4. Chapter 6 was awesome, they just keep getting better and better as we go!
    We really need to watch our WORDS!! Words are powerful they are life or death. Proverbs 18:21 says, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.” 18:20, “A man’s belly shall be satisfied with the fruit of his mouth; and with the increase of his lips shall he be filled.” Page 106 Renee talked about our words and how they plant seeds of doubt!! WATCH YOUR WORDS!!
    I love the “Who I Am In Christ” verses. I am going to put them on cards and take them with me and say them out loud to plant those seeds of victory in my heart and life every chance I get!! Thanks Renee for all your great tips, advice and being so vulnerable to share your life with us. Gob bless you and all the OBS ladies. Praying for all of you daily!!

  5. I’m so in need of hearing, and believing, these truths. I had just ‘thought’ negative thoughts, insecure thoughts – loud enough to be words spoken for my heart to hear- before I listened to the video. Now I need to read chapter 6, again, and grasp onto, again, Hebrew 10:35-39. Looking forward to the next chapters of truth!

    • Julie E. says:

      Hi Tammy!

      I just had the same thing happen to me. I was eating breakfast this morning and I too started having doubts about myself- how I wasn’t good enough. What a failure I’ve been, etc. Then, I got on my computer to check my email and there was Renee’s smiling face on her video! It was what I so needed to hear this morning! Within mere minutes of me thinking those thoughts, there was Renee building us up with God’s message of hope! Thank you so much for speaking to me directly! You are a Godsend! I will keep reminding myself to stand firm on God’s promises.

      Thanks to all the wonderful ladies out there who give me strength with their stories and comments. You are all beautiful!

      • 🙂 I love getting to spend this time with each of you!! Anytime you need some face to face encouragement, just come on back and I’ll cheer you on all day!!

  6. Paul, a pillar of the faith, warns us that those who “measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves” are not wise (2 Cor. 10:12). Our struggle with comparison will always leave us feeling like we’re lacking something. Oh how true!

    If we have put our trust in Christ as our Savior, we can stand on the promises of who we are in Him – chosen, holy and dearly loved (Col 3:12). Oh how we need to rest in that truth. Trusting in Christ is the beginning of the promises we have in Him.

  7. This was an amazing video. It has given me strength if only for 30 minutes. Thank you so very much. You are a gift from God

    • Praying for you Tina!! That message will be here for you all day. We can meet here via video again at lunch and dinner and I’ll keep encouraging you each time!

  8. I love the exercise Renee challenged us with this week. Physically writing out our doubts and trashing them! Powerful! I often times find myself in doubt when I compare myself to my coworkers. Being someone who facilitates smaller size motivational meetings, comparing myself to other ladies who have been doing the same job, just a lot longer than I have, is very easy to do. My take away from this chapter is the Truth found in Philippians 1:6 “I am confident God will complete the good work He started in me.” You bet, that this doubt will be one I write out and trash! I have to remember that it’s a continual choice to choose to lean on Truth and not give in to deception.
    Awesome chapter Renee!

    • Doing this exercise of writing down our doubts and throwing them away is so powerful b/c it helps us recognize them, refute them and replace them with the security of God’s promises!

    • Hi, Kourt: Thank you for sharing Philippians 1:6, a very appropriate verse for this chapter. As I went through the am and fm thoughts, I thought of Romans 3:3l: “What then shall we say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us?” I often pray asking the Father to silence the lies of the world, the enemy and our flesh, and that truth would be magnified and prevail. This is all possible through Jesus Who loved us and gave Himself for us. What promises we have to receive and CLING to tightly!

      God bless you!

  9. Thank you Renee for the encouragement this morning!! I find my confidence in 1 Peter 5:6-7 Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God, so that He may exalt you at the proper time. Casting all your care on Him, because He cares about you. I am called to walk with Him and obey. For my life to have meaning and purpose, I WILL follow and He will promote me to my place at the proper time. Thank you Father!!

    • I love 1 Peter 5:6-7 Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God, so that He may exalt you at the proper time. Casting all your care on Him, because He cares about you! Thank you for reminding me of that wonderful truth this morning!

    • Thank you Annette for this scripture. reminding me God cares about us, and He is always there for us…..It was a great help fo rme today…

  10. Thank you, Renee, for this beautiful message. It brought tears to my eyes. I am going to watch it again! It gave me such comfort and hope.

    • Praying for you Maureen!! You are valuable, chosen, pursued, loved, gifted and called!! Don’t let Satan convince you otherwise. Throw away those doubts today!!

  11. “We may be betrayed and cast aside, but we are chosen and redeemed by our Heavenly Father.” (Chap. 6, p. 111) While working through these two chapters this week, I have begun to tell my Heavenly Father that I do not want to live my life in the shadow of doubt anymore. When I read the sentence that I quoted above, I smiled, chuckled and said, “That’s right!”. So now, I will choose to remember exactly these words in my journey to victory over my doubt. Thank you.

    • Amen!!

      • That was a powerful verse for me when my mom tried to remind me of all the wrong things that I had done in the past. I replied, “I have been redeemed and forgiven by God for my past, God knows that I am sorry and what is in my heart.” I truely believe I have been redeemed, so have you! All of us who believe that Jesus died for us have been.

  12. Thank you Renee for sharing your experiences with us! I think many of us can relate to the Michael story! I couldn’t help but to chuckle as I recounted my past events. Thank God for deliverance and restoration! I’m so grateful to God for revealing more and more truth as the book progresses! I’m feeling freer by the day! Im getting intentional! Thanks again! To God be the glory!

    • Oh I love that Syd!! What you pour in, you will get out. Keep being intentional, examining your thoughts, taking them to Jesus and asking Him for an accuracy check, replacing your doubts with His truth. It’s a powerful process that works when we do it – Im evidence of a heart that has been set free!

  13. I just watched the Chapter 6 video. I absolutely loved the part about writing our insecurities and doubts on a piece of paper and throwing them in the trash. What a great visual. We carry around our doubts and insecurities and they just drag us down. This way we can purge them from our minds and put them where they need to go…the trash. Then we are open to fill ourselves up with the truth of God’s word! Have a blessed day everyone! XXOO

    • Amen!! Get out that paper and pen and write them down, throw them away and get one truth from our chart to hold onto!!

      Heb 10:35-36!

  14. I like our experiment this week! I think I filled the trash can though.

  15. Sandysuccesssf says:

    Ty for the video. I plan on listening to it a number of times. I am a business owner that
    Struggles from not believing I belong what I am doing. Ty again

  16. angela taylor says:

    Hi Renee I have not read chapter 6 as of yet but I will today. The video ie great and I’m going to do the experiment and carry it a little furtuer I’m going to put the balled up papers in a special trash can and at the end of 7 days starting today I will count them and see just how many douths I have for one week.then I will put them in my burn barrel and burn them as I give them to God once and for all ( hopefully) I have a problem taking things back when I give them to God. The in control thing happens alot to me. But I’m getting better some. In Christ Love

  17. Today is my birthday….and to look on your page this morning Renee, and see You are mine….That spoke volume to me….and your video’s I am so loving to hear how God is working and changing us all and bring life to our walk with him…

    I have copied off the chart and when those thoughts come in, I will write it down and throw it out…Take action with the God’s Word and crumble the enemy’s lies…..

    Thank you Thank you!!!!

  18. Reaching out! As I read today’s email, with tears rolling down my face, begging the Lord to intervene. You know, the pain and hurt is so bad that you wish, the good Lord would come back NOW, and take it all away. The devil is winning at everything in my life. You see I have recently lost a huge part of myself. I don’t like who I have become. I feel I have lost everything. My marriage, my job, my walk with The Lord. I see no hope for my future. I have been suffering major depression for months now along with Aniexty and recently been diagnosed as codependent. I pray constantly asking The Lord for help, for intervention, for my marriage and to be healed. I would like to ask if you ladies would ever so kindly please take a few minutes and lift myself and my husband up in prayer. I feel I have no one else to turn to. And yes I am crying out to my Father, in faith for total restoration of my health and my marriage. “I know I am His!”. I am so thankful for you Renee, and much more thankful for you following the Lord’s calling in your life in writing this book. All the many blessings that has abound me by your words. Sincerely my deepest appreciation.
    In Christ Love, Heather

    • Hello Heather,

      I am praying for you to know who’s you are. You are King of Glory’s daughter, he has you by the hand and is forever with you. Do not be fooled into thinking the devil it winning! He only wins if you give up. And Jesus has already won the battle for us. Please believe me when I say that He still performs miracles. I am sorry for the distress that your stuggles are causing your heart, but know that God will not and does not waste our pain. It is hard to remember in the midst of it, but it is truth. He is already at the end of your struggle and knows what will happen. He is in control, rest in Him. He is a wonderful place of refuge. I was seeking refuge in Him a few months back and looked up what refuge meant. It means “the state of being safe or sheltered from pursuit, danger, or difficulty.” I pray for you to take comfort in His glorious wings of refuge.

    • Father God, I lift Heather and her husband to you. May she be overwhelmed with Your great and deep love for her and her family. I do pray that the lies of the enemy, her flesh and the world be silenced and the TRUTH of who she is in God would prevail. May she be strengthened in her inner man to stand firm and rest in the strong, everlasting arms of Jesus Christ and Father God Who love her immensely. May she know, in the midst of these struggles, Your peace that passes all understanding. May Heather have clarity of thinking regarding the issues with which she is dealing. I pray for wholeness for her – spiritually, socially, emotionally, physically and mentally. In Jesus’ Name, Amen!

      Rise up in praise our Lord dear, sweet sister. The enemy hates praise. When we submit to God and resist the devil, he must flee! Glory! We serve the sovereign Lord who has so much in store for us – more than we could ask, think or imagine. Keep your eyes, heart and mind fixed on Him. Jesus First….”…that in all things He might have the supremacy.” Colossians 1:18b.

    • Father God,

      I lift Heather and her husband up to you right now. I’m not sure of everything that is going on but you do and I ask for your Holy Spirit to intervene as your Word tells us that the Holy Spirit will take our groanings when we don’t know what ot say or how to pray and translate them into prayers for your to understand. Wrap yourself around Heather and let her feel and experience your love.

      Fill her with an understanding that you love like no other can nor no other will. Draw Heather and husband close to your heart and cause them to lean into for your love. I pray for healing for their hearts and their marriage. Allow them to see each other through your eyes.

      Replace those doubts with your grace, your love, your concern, your mercy and your compassion. Focus their eyes and hearts on you and not on themselves. Draw them to you and to your heart. I pray 1 Corinthians 13 over Heather and her husband. Give them an understanding of these scriptures.

      If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don’t love, I’m nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate.

      2 If I speak God’s Word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to a mountain, “Jump,” and it jumps, but I don’t love, I’m nothing.

      3-7 If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don’t love, I’ve gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I’m bankrupt without love.

      Love never gives up.
      Love cares more for others than for self.
      Love doesn’t want what it doesn’t have.
      Love doesn’t strut,
      Doesn’t have a swelled head,
      Doesn’t force itself on others,
      Isn’t always “me first,”
      Doesn’t fly off the handle,
      Doesn’t keep score of the sins of others,
      Doesn’t revel when others grovel,
      Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
      Puts up with anything,
      Trusts God always,
      Always looks for the best,
      Never looks back,
      But keeps going to the end.

      8-10 Love never dies. Inspired speech will be over some day; praying in tongues will end; understanding will reach its limit. We know only a portion of the truth, and what we say about God is always incomplete. But when the Complete arrives, our incompletes will be canceled.

      11 When I was an infant at my mother’s breast, I gurgled and cooed like any infant. When I grew up, I left those infant ways for good.

      12 We don’t yet see things clearly. We’re squinting in a fog, peering through a mist. But it won’t be long before the weather clears and the sun shines bright! We’ll see it all then, see it all as clearly as God sees us, knowing him directly just as he knows us!

      13 But for right now, until that completeness, we have three things to do to lead us toward that consummation: Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly, love extravagantly. And the best of the three is love.

      In Jesus’ name. Amen

    • Im praying for you Heather – claiming these promises for you tonight:

      Lord, You know the plans You have for Heather, plans to prosper her and not to harm her; plans to give her hope and a future. We are calling upon You and praying to You, because You promise that You will listen to us. You say that Heather will find You when she seeks You with all her heart. Please open the eyes of her heart so that she can know the hope to which You have called her and Your incomparably great power for us who believe. Rebuild Heather’s ruins and restore places devastated long ago in her heart.

      Help her forgive those who have hurt her, just as in Christ You forgave her. Despite the pain of her past, You offer hope for her future and want to do a new thing in Heather’s life, making a way in the desert and streams in her wastelands. When her soul is downcast, help her call this to mind so that she might have hope. Because of Your great love, she is not consumed, for Your compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness! In Jesus’ name, Amen.

      From Jeremiah 29:11–13; Ephesians 1:18–19; Isaiah 61:4; Ephesians 4:2, 32; Isaiah 43:18–19; Lamentations 3:20–23.

  19. Christine says:

    Thank you for helping me see how to change my doubts to God’s promises. What a wonderful example of Eve in Chapter 6. Thank you for helping me focus on God and his unfailing love.

  20. I read “Victory Over the Darkness” about 3 years ago. That book helped me to see I could be healed from depression, anxiety and borderline personality disorder. I feel hesitant to share that, because satan uses it against me sometimes. Like I haven’t really changed, so I am saying it because I believe God not him. I had taken possession of that diagnosis and felt like it was my label, my life. But it came with little hope of overcoming it. I just had to maintain some level of normalacy. It became my identity, and my excuse. The Who I Am in Christ statements were spoken out loud by me with broken sobs until I began to believe it. I had been told from my childhood that Jesus loved me, but I felt like I had fallen so far that it didn’t apply to me anymore. This book changed my view of how God saw me. I was able to get off my antidepressants after 10 years (with the help of a christian counselor)and emerged changed. There were many struggles that hit me following that decision, but I held onto God’s hand the entire time. He carried me, and taught me to slow down, to be thankful for my life, and how to love myself enough to say no to some people.

    I am learning new things with this study.
    Some things that jumped out to me in chapter 6 were….

    We are loved with reckless abandon by the King of Glory.

    The most important truth if all: God is in control.

    We have an enemy who is completely against us. He is jealous of God’s glory in us.

    We need to keep our minds clear by asking Jesus to replace the clutter of insecurity, pride, and Satan’s lies with the clarity of His truth.

    When you get that “not good enough” feeling, stop and ask God what
    triggered your thoughts and made you start turning toward the shadow of doubt. Then compare your thoughts to about the situation to God’s thoughts. Do they match? If not, look for a promise in God’s Word to replace the lie that has filled your heart with doubt.

    I did that out loud in the car yesterday. Wow, what a change that made in my way of processing my feelings about a situation.

    • Praise God, Brittney:! Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts with us. What a testimony – and it continues! Glory! May we learn from it and move forward in Jesus Who is THE TRUTH!

      God bless you richly!

    • Love that Brittany …. I went around today as I was calling on my stores with the following mantra going through my mind ….”this is not of God” …. “this is not of God.” Love how he works in our lives.

  21. Of course the very week that I face stronger spiritual battles for my mind, God armed me with His wisdom from Renee’s chapter 6, reminding me of all His promises and insightful wisdom!!

    “…although these feelings may end up as fear or worry, their source is self-doubt.” p. 98 SO TRUE!!!
    “Doubting God’s promises makes it hard to trust God’s heart.” p. 109 AMEN!

    God reaffirmed it as I just opened up my Bible to the appropriate story in Mark 4 of the frantic disciples in the storm trying to wake up Jesus. He calmly replied, “Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?” Tears.

    And then I remembered the other boat scene with Peter and Jesus…the second he took his eyes off of Jesus and looked around at the fearful situation…Jesus replied, “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you DOUBT?” Matthew 14:31 So humbled.

    Where is my mustard seed of faith in the sea of doubt? Taking my eyes, my mind, my heart, my thoughts off of Jesus makes me equivalent to a boat with a small hole in it…just a little bit of questioning, just a small incident, starts the process of sinking….and sinking fast. SO WHY DO I START??

    Praying to have more self control and more protection with God’s word guarding my mind. There really is no other way to be strong.


  22. I will begin Chapter 6 soon but watched the video this morning. Thank you for your insight. This is exactly what I needed at this time. I just started a new job this week after being a stay-at-home mom for 10 years. My confidence so needs a boost! I loved Hebrews 10:35-36, 39. And The Don’t Throw Away your Confidence PDF will be posted in my house, in my car, at work… Thank you so much!

    • Praying for you Kim as you begin your new job. May God give you the strength and confidence that you need daily. Never forget that you are His.

  23. Courtney says:

    Renee, I loved your message today and Chapter 6. At first I cringed when I read the title! I got that shaky, faint feeling because this is my number one insecurity! It’s so many things I want to and want to try, but I let the spirit of fear hold me back. I doubt myself often and make the dreadful mistake of comparing myself to others. When I compare, I have to tell myself that I don’t know their backstory or maybe the hell they went through to get to where they are. I also remind myself that God is gives us a spirit of confidence, hope, and strength. Not a spirit of fear and I must preserve.

    Thank you for sharing about your failed engagement. It shows you didn’t give up on love, but used that as a lesson and a stepping stone. You could have given up on the promises of God and marrying the man of you’re dreams; but you didn’t! It’s just a reminder that God takes us through things to prepare us for what is ahead. I have to remember that God never promised us easy, but it will be worth it if we hang in there! God doesn’t take us through things to give us doubt and fear, but to give us character that will sustain us in our further situations.

  24. Christina says:

    Thank you Renee for showing me that I may worries are really self-doubt! I loved the video and I will be doing the exercise! I love the thought of writing down my doubts and throwing them away! I will be holding onto the truths on the Don’t Thow Away Your Confedence print off! Thank-you!

  25. I don’t know if I can continue this study. I know I need it. but it hurts so much, so much of my past is being tilled and I am not handling this well. I am praying and I just can’t seem to get past everything that is being brought up. All my insecurties and feelings of worthlessness. I hurt myself a few weeks ago and have been trying to heal it on my own. I need to see a doctor, so per my husbands request, I made one for today. I have vision issues so I don’t drive. He took the day off to take me and went to help some friends before the appointment and he totally forgot about it and me. How can I feel confident when I my own husband forgets me. God help me to understand. I hurt so bad. Both emotional and physically.

    • Susan Whitaker says:

      Cyndi, I want you to know that we are praying for you. We are praying for one another.
      Crying because you feel the pain in your heart is okay. We all are facing different struggles and are feeling the discomfort. We are all on the same ship but in different cabins. Listen to Renee’s words over and over again in her videos. Close your eyes and really listen. God has given her those words to speak to you, me and everyone listening and reading her book. It’s no accident that you are reading the book, listening to Renee in her videos or reading this post. God has a plan for you and all of us. You can be strong because God is your strength. Go back and listen to Chapter 3 video. Only God can fill the emptiness and heal your pain. God bless you.

    • Lord,

      I thank you for Cyndi. I thank you for filling her with your boldness to be so real and so honest about how she feels. I pray Father God that you would remove those doubts in Cyndi’s heart and mind and replace them one by one with your promises. Fill Cyndi with your courage to name those doubts, write them down, throw them away and never ever pick them up again. Father God, I pray that she would truly grasp how wide, how deep, how long your love is for her. I ask him to strengthen you by his Spirit—not a brute strength but a glorious inner strength—that Christ will live in you as you open the door and invite him in. And I ask him that with both feet planted firmly on love, you’ll be able to take in with all followers of Jesus the extravagant dimensions of Christ’s love. Reach out and experience the breadth! Test its length! Plumb the depths! Rise to the heights! Live full lives, full in the fullness of God.

      Lord, fill her with your understanding and show Cyndi how to love herself through your eyes. Make her a Believer of Psalm 139.

      13 For you created my inmost being;
      you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
      14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
      your works are wonderful,
      I know that full well.
      15 My frame was not hidden from you
      when I was made in the secret place,
      when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
      16 Your eyes saw my unformed body;
      all the days ordained for me were written in your book
      before one of them came to be.
      17 How precious to me are your thoughts,[a] God!
      How vast is the sum of them!
      18 Were I to count them,
      they would outnumber the grains of sand—
      when I awake, I am still with you.

      Fill her up with yourself, your courage, your love, your grace, your mercy, your kindness, your boldness, your Truths, your discernment.

      Heal her body and encourage your spirit.

      In your Son’s name, the name of Jesus, I pray. Amen.

    • Jesus,

      I lift Cyndi up to you and pray that you will fill Cyndi with the desire to continue the study. Fill her with the courage to keep turning the pages and to allow your promises to flood her heart. Encourage Cyndi with your words, your love, your grace, your mercy.

      I thank you for filling Cyndi with your boldness as she shared her thoughts and her heart with this group of women. I pray that as she moves those pages from the right to the left that she will grasp and fully understand each promise that Renee shares with her. Help her unbelief with those promises. Give her your eyes to see herself as you see her. Help her to believe your truths of Psalm 139 that she is fearfully and wonderfully made and that she was worth dying for.

      I ask him (God) to strengthen you by his Spirit—not a brute strength but a glorious inner strength—that Christ will live in you as you open the door and invite him in. And I ask him that with both feet planted firmly on love, you’ll be able to take in with all followers of Jesus the extravagant dimensions of Christ’s love. Reach out and experience the breadth! Test its length! Plumb the depths! Rise to the heights! Live full lives, full in the fullness of God.

      God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us.

      Fill Cyndi with your understanding, with your grace, with your love, with your mercy, with your discernment, with your courage and with your boldness to continue to turn those pages. Replace her doubts with your promises and teach Cyndi to believe your promises. Remove those self doubts and replace with your confidence. Go before Cyndi, take her hand and lead her step by step, word by word, line by line through Renee’s book. Use Renee’s story to transform her heart of doubts to a heart full of confidence of who she is in.

      In Jesus’ name. Amen.

    • Lord, thank You that in Christ Cyndi is chosen, holy, and dearly loved. Remind her again and again that she is a crown of splendor in her Lord’s hand, a royal diadem in the hand of her God. Whenever someone rejects her, heal her hurting heart with the promise that You will never leave her nor forsake her. When Cyndi is tempted to find her significance and security apart from Your provision and promises, help her resist Satan’s lies and temptations and stand firm in her faith. Help her not to give up Lord.

      When insecurity threatens to take her captive, help Cyndi remember that Christ has set her free, and help her refuse to be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. Holy Spirit, remind Cyndi every day that such confidence as this is her through Christ—not that she is competent in herself to claim anything for herself, but her significance and ompetence comes from YOU.

      She has been given fullness in Christ, who is the Head over every power and authority. May she have the courage and determination to choose to believe YOUR goodness makes her good enough! In Jesus’ powerful name I pray, Amen.

      From Colossians 3:12; Isaiah 62:3; Deuteronomy 31:6; 1 Peter 5:9; Galatians 5:1; 2 Corinthians 3:4–5; Colossians 2:10.

      • angela taylor says:

        Hi Renee
        I will say Amen to what you wrote for Cyndi plus pray your prayer for all the lady’s. In Christ Love

      • Michelle Lopez says:

        Renee, How do I get past the negative voices that make me feel horriable? Your book WAS written for me through God. He is using you to help me however I know it is NOT really you that can help me… it is HIM. I know all of this but my mind tells me all negative things. I could be more detailed but I am an old dog and this is the FIRST time I have ever been on a blog!! I did post one earlier in order to help someone I do not even know. That is IT! I see all of the confidence for others but NONE for ME. I love to help others but the truth is I can’t even help myself. I know only God can help me but for some reason it seems I can’t let Him. If you have a word on this, I would greatly appreciate it. Again I do not know how this blog thing works but I know you do not have time to counsel me. I just thought I would give this a try because I am emotionally dying within my spirit especially when I am working so hard to believe and trust.

        • Michelle, I understand completely what you are saying. I am in the same situation. Others come to me and I am able to share and encourage them but the negative battle going on in my mind is tormenting.
          I too don’t understand how I can help others over come their issues through showing them the scriptures and saying the right things at the right time but in my heart I can’t believe it for myself.

          One thing that seems to help me a little is listening to the word through headphones (on my mobile) while I go for a walk (at least half an hour a day) or listening to sermon podcasts. If only I could do that all day everyday things would be ok.
          Trying to focus on God. I know it’s hard, even during prayer times my mind can wander away from the task at hand to the negative.
          Will be praying for you Michelle that both of us will learn to control those thoughts and focus on God.

  26. Renee, I thank God for you and all the Proverb 31 staff. Your book has been amazing. I enjoyed the video, and the tip on “writing down my doubts and trashing them” You are so right when you said “our minds are the battlefied”, we can’t let anyone or anything drag us down and determine what we feel… We need to remember always John 8:44 satan ia a liar!
    I have written the scripture down that you included 1Peter5:8-9 which starts “keep your mind clear and be alert” will keep it in my purse. We need to keep our eyes on Jesus. We will all miss the mark, as they say, but we have a loving, gracious, merciful and forgiving Savior.

    I will hang on to His word. From now on I will pray first, when I feel lead to do something, and not let someone or my mind discourage me before I even pray.

    I loved the part of Gary’s story that we are all “wrecked up” and his wfie’s note “You belong to the King”–that touched my heart it was beautiful….

    I love the prayers at the end of the chapters, thank you. I have my seven verses ready to go, although I just love all of them.

    Excited for the next chapter.

    God is in control, and I am His child…..Blessed

  27. Chapter 6 was another life changing chapter. I have had many times when I felt “not good enough.” I felt less compared to my sister, co workers, friends, etc. I felt like I was “not as good as they are.” I highlighted “Satan intends to deceive us by getting us to take our eyes off of who we are in Christ and focus on our flaws and then spend our days figuring out how we can hide them.” This is so true!! The other day, I was having anxiety about an upcoming test in 6 weeks. I was making myself sick but after reading over chapter 5; I realized, it’s great if I pass but if I don’t, it’s ok too. I felt like a huge weight was lifted from my shoulder. Tuesday evening, we found out we have termites on the siding of our house, my tires are bald, and I need service on my car. Just when I felt like God is in control and whatever happens, happens; chaos started. I read that sentence in chapter 6 and was able to pull things together. Somehow, some way God will provide. Thank you so much for this book. I cannot thank you enough.

  28. Susan Whitaker says:

    Each chapter continues to speak directly to me. It’s like reminding me of what I already know but didn’t really believe wholeheartedly. A light bulb has went off and I’m thinking, “Wow, I get it!” Thank you Renee for listening to Our Lord and saying the words I need to hear. I am totally getting alot out of this study. It’s been a God send. I am praying the prayers at the end of the chapters and thinking about the words as I say them.

  29. Mary Hilding says:

    That was a great video. Just trying to really grasp Gods love for me is hard. I am working on that and hopefully eventually i will be free of it but renee that video was very encouraging.

  30. Renee,

    I never tire of your teachings! I pulled out my wallet and found the promise that I received at the Compel Conference…..”Beautiful…”You are a crown of spendor in the Lord’s hand, a royal diadem in the hand of your God.” Isaiah 62:3.

    Thanks for saying “yes” to God and being a difference maker for his kingdom and for my heart.

    Love ya,

  31. I am His!

  32. Tami Meyer says:

    Wow! This chapter made me cry but all for good reasons. I am typing one handed cause this week I am going through medical issues. The doctors think I have a pinched nerve and I have lost all feeling in my left arm accompanied by horrible headaches. Got an MRI done today now just waiting on results.

    So I wanted to share a few things that God spoke to me.

    Romans 8:28~ No matter what I go through God is always there. No matter if its bad with God it can be changed. You have to turn and decide your ready to get out of the pit!

    2 Corinthians 1:21-22~ I have been established: He chose to give me life, he created me
    I have been anointed: He died on the cross, I have been covered by his love and grace
    I have been sealed: I have been anointed with His Holy Spirit and sealed from the enemy with His protection.

    Thank you so much Renee for this chapter. I sat outside yesterday in the sun and just spent time listening to God and what a beautiful chapter!

    • Thank you for sharing what God spoke to you, Tami. I was especially struck by “You have to turn and decide you’re ready to get out of the pit!” True! One day, recently, following some negative thoughts coming, I literally turned by body and looked up and spoke of THE LIGHT! I set my attention on my King! Praise Him.

      God bless you, Tami!

  33. Treasure says:

    I am HIS!!!!!!!

  34. Stephanie Rudash says:

    Lately my doubts have been with my physical abilities. I am going through rehab and sometimes it’s hard to know how far you can physically push yourself. Also, I have a desire to do all of these other things, but I’m afraid I’ll overdo it – which is usually pretty detrimental to my rehab. God has really been blessing me spiritually and emotionally lately, and I want to praise Him for it!!!!

  35. Grace & Peace Renee
    As I began to read chapter 6 I felt sad, and than happy that every thing turn out happy for you.
    As I mentioned I never got married, but I did get engaged once. He had lot’s of insecurities, and didn’t have a
    father figure. I never wanted marriage, because I based on my parents failed marriage. I said to myself is that’s what marriage supposed to be like I didn’t want any part of marriage. Than I started to read the bible, and realized what God said about marriage. Then I meet someone else, I felt in love with a Christian man, I wanted him to ask me to be his wife. wife. That didn’t happen, he wanted us to remained being together without commitment. He was hurt by his first love, so he had trust issues. I asked God why me, and what’s wrong with me that I keep attracting the same men. Taking about shadow of doubt, when it comes to falling in love, I have giving that up. I feel I only going get hurt again, I don’t know what to look for, and my trust in judgment is very low. I also have other issues like, I’m to fat, and whose going to want employed woman. woman I loved the idea of throwing away my fears, doubts, and worries into the trash can. For it’s taken one day at time. It’s a new beginning, and it’s feels like being born again. Renewing of your mind. So I’m asking God to help me think differently. I’m asking God to used me to do his will, so I can live in his promises. I thank
    God for guiding me to this book A Confidence Heart. I thank God for you Renee, for he is using you to help us. God is good, and he loves us some much that he will never leave us, or forsake us. Thanks Lord for loving me.

  36. Unemployed women

  37. Throwing away all my insecurities, and asking God to take this from me. Healing is a process, and I am willing to give it all to God so I can live. What a good idea, and I will share this with my love one’s. Thanks again Renee.

  38. Thank you Renee for your video it felt personal. I am working on recognizing my negative thoughts that leave me feeling not good enough. I also printed your “Don’t Throw Away Printables” to refer to when doubt first enters my thoughts.

  39. Thank you so much for this chapter and for the video! I am taking note of the “when doubt comes against me” portions of this chapter – such good thoughts and verses!

    I especially like what you said at the end of the video, as I struggle with security and with anxiety. “I will not throw away my confidence, I will persevere, so that when I do the will of God, I will receive what He has promised.” Amen!

  40. thank you. I love so very much that you give us scripture to use on our own, and teach us how to use it. Praying the Word is so powerful!!! It is trully putting feet to our prayers. there is power in the Word!!

  41. Wow! I had to do a double take in Chapter 6, where Renee once too struggled with codependency also. Thank you for sharing these words. As I know personally the hurt, the pain, and the embarrassment of those words. This Bible study has been such a love and blessing to my soul with perfect timing.
    I also want to thank everyone for the prayers lifted up in my name. God is doing a work through this Bible study, Renee, and my sisters in Christ. Thank you

  42. Renee, I know we’re in chapter 6, but if I can just go back to chapter 5 (sorry, I’m a little behind). There is one sentence that summed it all up for me, the “a-ha!” moment. You wrote, “our family of origin does not define our true identity”. Thank you! thank you! thank you! I am so tired of being in a family where some are “so much more spiritual” than others. They freely cast there opinions (judgments) upon others: “you are not honoring your parents” (because I disagree with my Mom over how I parent my own children); “public schools are child abuse” (when their children have all graduated from public schools), “you need saved, you need Jesus”, because I don’t live up to THEIR expectations. I’m tired of feeling guilty because I don’t want to be anything like them. Although I am commanded to walk in love, I am not required to live like them and agree with them. My personal relationship with God is between Him and me. HE is my judge, so I better be more concerned about what HE thinks about me than them. And thank God that in Christ, I AM good enough! I have lived my entire life (47 years) living to please others. Not any more! Thank you Renee, for this fabulous, life-changing book! I especially love the prayers and the end of each chapter. I plan to write them all down on index cards and pray them every morning!

    • Our earthly families play a role in our lives, but a church leader once told me that our spiritual family redeemed by Jesus’ blood is just as important, and sometimes, if not more so. I’m glad that you are able to stop living to please others and just work to please God. My parents were pretty controlling over my life too, until I gently told them that I will be living how God wants me to live. They still don’t quite get it because they are not believers, but they see how God has blessed me and how much I have changed for the better, so I pray that someday, they too would join our spiritual family!

    • We went through a long battle with my parents last year. Luckily, I had the support of our church. We go to the same one. I spoke with our pastor and our parish assistant. My parents like to tell me the same thing. “Honor your father and mother” when I disagreed with something. It was over my husband and I’s parenting style verses theirs. It got pretty rough. What my pastor told me was. We are not required to obey our parents when we are no longer under their care. I was not dishonoring them by parenting my children differently than they parented me. In the end, my husband and I are responsible for our children, not them. It is tricky, because we don’t want to hurt their feelings. But when grandparents go against the parent’s wishes for their own children, then that goes against the boundaries of being a grandparent. It was a behavior that we had accepted/ignored for awhile, so they really had a problem with it. Plus it is kind of accepted by society with such signs as “What happens at Grandma’s house stays and Grandma’s house”, and “If mom says no, I’ll just ask grandma.” In the end, my mom said talk to your kids, put the “rules” on my fridge and when they ask something I can go to the fridge and ask them what would their parents say?

      • It does get a little tricky when parents pull the “honor your parents” thing. It caused me to really examine my faith, and even doubt that I was really a Christian. I began to ask, “God, is this really what you are like? Am I really going to live my life thinking that I’m OK and accepted by you, then on judgment day, you will condemn me?” God spoke to my heart and said, “You know you are mine”. I got chills, because I KNEW that it was His voice. I’m not sure where, but there is a verse that says, “parents-do not cause your children to stumble”. I’ve never heard this verse explained before. My mom and her siblings all believe that you respect your elders, and that adult children do not deserve respect. This attitude has completely destroyed our extended family. Even my uncle, who is a pastor,told me, “there is nowhere in the Bible that says children are to be honored.” I don’t want honor, I just want to parent my kids my way. Britney, it’s great that it seems your Mom is making an effort to do things differently.

  43. My heart is heavy today and well I am having alot of self-doubt going on. I went to see my prayer counselor today only to feel like I am worthless to myself and to others. I understand how satan is playing with my heart right now but, don’t know how to describe it. When I read chapter 6 I saw myself in there in more ways than one. I tried to llisten to what my prayer counsleor was sharing with me but it was like there is this block or barrier of some type that is not allowing me to see whatever it was that she was trying to show me.
    Satan has taken away so much of my life growing up and now he is working in my heart again. I feel like there is this spiritual warefare going on inside ot me and all I am hearing is your not worth it.Quit trying to be somebody that your not can’t you see that God is only fooling you. Who do you think that you are wanting to become a sunday school teacher and wanting to help out with kids church and maybe even someday leading a bible study. Are you crazy? I need for Gentle Shepperd as I call Jesus to walk me back into that light that I feel is fading away steadily. I need the prayers of my sisters to help me know that I am not a bad person to dig out that self-doubt and have a more positive perspective on myself as well as my future.
    I am trying my best to keep my chin up and not feel so much worthlessness right now, but finding it hard to do that . I am being challenged by this chapter right here and right now.Well, guess that is all for now.

    • You are in my prayers. Those verses in chapter 6 have been a great confidence boost for me, and I hope they can be the same for you. While we have no righteousness of our own, God loved us so much to redeem us and make us complete in His strength. So while you cannot serve God on untrue own strength, you can do wonders on His. Don’t give up, God is rooting for you and so are we!

  44. My heart is heavy today and well I am having alot of self-doubt going on. I went to see my prayer counselor today only to feel like I am worthless to myself and to others. I understand how satan is playing with my heart right now but, don’t know how to describe it. When I read chapter 6 I saw myself in there in more ways than one. I tried to llisten to what my prayer counsleor was sharing with me but it was like there is this block or barrier of some type that is not allowing me to see whatever it was that she was trying to show me.
    Satan has taken away so much of my life growing up and now he is working in my heart again. I feel like there is this spiritual warefare going on inside ot me and all I am hearing is your not worth it.Quit trying to be somebody that your not can’t you see that God is only fooling you. Who do you think that you are wanting to become a sunday school teacher and wanting to help out with kids church and maybe even someday leading a bible study. Are you crazy? I need for Gentle Shepperd as I call Jesus to walk me back into that light that I feel is fading away steadily. I need the prayers of my sisters to help me know that I am not a bad person to dig out that self-doubt and have a more positive perspective on myself as well as my future.
    I am trying my best to keep my chin up and not feel so much worthlessness right now, but finding it hard to do that . I am being challenged by this chapter right here and right now.Well, guess that is all for now. thanks for listening to all my rambling

  45. Sorry it posted twice am having trouble with my computer.

  46. Charletta Rupert says:

    I am so blessed the Lord led me to you. I have been soaking in all of this good advice while yelling “stop smashing my toes” . THANK YOU THANK YOU May God richly bless you and your ministry, you are a God send to me.

  47. This has been the start of a very heart and soul searching study. As I have read over the previous post I too can hear my own voice, see stories of my past, I remember the pot of spaghetti being thrown and my mom with blood running down her face…. having lived through a violent start in life, when my bio-dad finally was removed from our home, I was so relieved. I was taught early to seek God. There were many unending days filled with questions of “why? how can this be?? .’it did not make sense to hear of a loving father’ Yet others would feel sorry for me that our parents were divorced, this left me unable to truly share as I was elated he was gone yet others comments left me feeling shame that I felt that way. I can see we [ladies] all go through our trials-the results are the enemy is trying to steal from us and have us to believe the lies. tears flow as I let Jesus heal those hurts. I too seek the word that gives me the shield of protection I so want. Thanks everyone for sharing and I have loved reading the words of encouragement- it sounds like it goes out to us all.

  48. my sister and i just listened to your comments on the video and she said to me
    ”i have been looking for the little rubber button for my entire life, not because it was important
    but i feared the wrath of others’ we have really had some revalations in this study.
    things that were never spoken of becuase of fear

  49. TJ Ellis says:

    This video is just what I needed. I have had such a doubtfully emotional week. I cannot wait to trow away my doubts. Satan has been attacking me with hurts from past all week. Both verses are solid truth I can use to fight lies. Thank you the book is something I plan to use from this day forward! Love reading comments too, can’t wait until Tues.

  50. This chapter is especially hard for me as well as helpful. Hard because the ugly words that keep spinning around in my head and heart that I have heard over the years, are hard to silence. Helpful because I am reminded that just because I am struggling with a rocky marriage, stress from finances, and married to a non-believer, I am reminded that I am not alone, that I do count, because I am one of God’s children. It seems lately the more and more I am drawing closer to Christ, the more and more bad things are happening around me, and to me. I will however, not lose faith. I am remembering that God is in control and His works are for my good in all circumstances. Thanks to you Renee for reminding me, and all of us this very important message. Bless you for writing this book and getting His word out to all of us.

    • Jerrianne says:

      Janis- I could have written your post, you are not alone. I am in a 33 year rocky marriage to an unbeliever with severe mental issues. Lots of tears this week. I took the time to write out the AM/FM statements that spoke to me and I am going to claim them everyday.

  51. Tammy Haymon says:

    So glad to finally have something tangible to battle the feelings of low self-confidence. I am loving this study that is helping me focus on the truth instead of Satan’s lies. Why is it so easy to believe the bad stuff and not the good?

  52. I am just amazed at Daddy God’s timing. Last night I was singing with my group and it had gone really well. At the end of the service though the enemy came at me “big time” with old insecure, negative, comparison thoughts that I had thought I had gotten over. Daddy God was already pointing these things out to me and I had gotten rid of alot of stuff and then seen this onine Bible study and knew it would help me continue on the path I had started. Just yesterday morning I had taken off work and spent the morning with Father God to consecrate myself before Him, to be able to minister to the people last night. I had quickly thrown away my confidence that I had just felt so strong about just a few hours prior. I was standing praying asking God to show me something new of Himself even though I was fighting trying to reject the thoughts the enemy was firing at me. Later on as the service progressed, someone came up behind me and told me how they saw God in me and all over me and it touched me so. This morning I called a friend and repented of allowing the enemy to take my confidence and put back on me those feelings of insecurity and self-doubt. Felt so much better after talking with her and praying with her. Then WOW look what appears for today’s message. EXACTLY what I needed. I thank Daddy God so much for His mercy and faithfulness to me. We sing again tonight and I’m ready this time. More equipped and aware of the enemy’s tactics. I’m committed not to throw away my confidence tonight but BOLDLY GO WHERE NO MAN HAS GONE BEFORE with Emmanuel (God with us!!!). Thank you so much Renee. This book/bible study has been exactly what the doctor (Great Physician) ordered for me in this season of my life. I KNOW I will be totally changed forever because of it. Daddy God is doing a mighty work in me for these last days. I will be a mighty warrior in His Army!!!

    • Thank you for sharing, you are an amazing woman of God. I think it is normal for us to be attacked, either by the enemy or by the sin of a fallen world. It is great to admit to these struggles and receive prayer from those we trust. I told my prayer partner that most of the time, people don’t even have to attack me, all I have to do is open a fashion magazine, and I will “attack” my own looks, clothes, shoes, accessories, hairstyle, etc. I have to replace criticism with God’s word, which Renee conveniently provided a wheel bunch in chapter 6! If only there was a find and replace function for our brains…

  53. Studying this week again, one morning I was talking to God about how locked in my insecurity I felt, how difficult my feelings towards myself are – like a prison. I felt the spirit say, but I already have secured the key. You just have to accept it.
    I need to stop throwing away confidence.

  54. I just love how God has given Renee much wisdom in these teachings. I’m one who needs a ‘blueprint’ on ‘what to do next’, and Renee gives us the blueprint in these videos. She also gives us great scriptures from the Word to back up the truths that she teaches. I loved these scriptures! Hebrews 10:39 is one of my favorites… that gives me confidence and courage to persevere in the challenges of life. God never fails! 🙂
    Bless you all!

  55. Renee, I just have to thank you for the free download this week. I was up earlier for my week 3 walk/run struggling to complete my 3 minute run. (Doesn’t sound like very long but it was 5am and 40 degrees outside. LOL) As I was thinking I can’t finish this today the image of the don’t throw away your confidence sheet popped into my head. And then I remember Phil. 4:13 I can do all things through Christ which strengthenth me. So, I finished the run. It was an aha moment for me this morning!

    And I had a great rest of the day after that!

    I also found this verse this week: Psa. 78:39 “He remembered that they were but flesh, a passing breeze that does not return.” It made me stop and think about how we have talked about our hurt feelings from others. And how no matter how much we are hurt by others they are just flesh, a passing breeze, but God is always with us and He is the only one that truly matters. It is easier said than done but I am hoping to keep this verse (and others) in mind when I start thinking about what others think of me.

    I am so thankful for this Bible Study. As I have said before, it couldn’t have come at a better time.

  56. Jerrianne says:

    Thank you for the reminder that GOD IS IN CONTROL. I needed to hear that this week as I have had to surrender my husband and marriage to the Lord. Lots of tears and soul searching. I spent tonight rereading Chapters 5 and 6 and it was just what I need. I rewrote the words from the song into statement form that I am claiming for my husbands mental concerns and my marriage.
    Waiting and surrending it to the one that is in control.

    I am going to use the AM/FM statement too.

  57. Praying for you Jerrianne. I can only imagine what you must be going (& have gone) through. Ps. 91:1, 2 & 4: “He will cover you…” Dwell, rest, trust, find refuge in Him, allow Him to be your “fortress.” And Ps 91:9-16. Call on & rely on Him, your covering, protector …

    • Jerrianne says:

      Tammy thank you for the prayers, I am going to look up those verses. Today I am thankful for the baby steps that happened already this morning. It has been so freeing know that God is in control. Now I just have to continue to hold on to that promise.

  58. Michelle says:

    I woke up this morning feeling like all the progress I have made was thrown away by me yesterday. I went on a field trip with my daughter and was in a group with a mom who is extremely confident and I felt she took charge of everything. I am one when a person seems so confidently taking leadership I will shrink back even if I don’t agree. Because I feel who am I to say anything they are obviously smarter and stronger and are more liked and who am I to tell them I disagree. But inside it makes me angry because I think who are they to bulldoze like that. But no one else has a problem with how they are operating so what is wrong with me? I feel so small this morning again. I so easily threw my confidence out the window yesterday.
    Why is it so hard to change my mindset? I want so desperately to be confident. Is it because I don’t know how to let go and let God? Or is it because I want so desperately to be liked and accepted from people that God won’t let that happen until I seek it only from Him? I feel so lost and isolated and lonely and wrong, I hate these feelings. I never feel listened to. I never feel understood.
    My doctor prescribed anti-depressants to try and help with all these depressed feelings it seemed to help at first but they are all back. How do I process all this with God? I feel like I cry out in my prayer journal all the time. But never heal all the past hurts regrets and mistakes. Do I have to go to every person in my life and apologize for who I have been?
    Lord help me. I feel so small and lost and confused and frustrated. Why do I always feel like I am wrong? Show me please my stumbling blocks. I want to be free in You. I want to be able to love those you place in my life. I love my husband and my kids. I am so grateful for them. But I struggle in every other relationship.
    I need you Lord Jesus. Please come over me, fill me, help me to accept your love and forgiveness. Help me to please be confident in You.
    In Jesus mighty name, Amen

    • Jerrianne says:

      Michelle, my heart goes out to you. Sharing your story and your pain is often the first step to complete healing. Remember that God created you to be you. You are special in His eyes and He loves you more than you could ever imagine. When I am down, I turn on the Christian radio station and let the words of the music speak to me, it is amazing how just the right songs comes on, God is so good!!!!

      I would encourage you to find a mentor from church that can walk this journey with you. Pray about who you should ask, God will show you. Let this person be the hands and feet of Jesus to you.

      Renee has so great statements in Ch.6, pick a few and claim them for this journey. Cheering you on and remember once you surrender, then God is in control.

    • Maureen Chiasson says:

      Michelle recognizing that feeling and crying out to the Lord are good first steps toward the confidence you are seeking. I have experience that often. I had to find support from loving non judgmentalpeople to accept rejection from others and myself. I read a book called How People Grow by cloud and Townsend to help me understand this concept. I had to realize that I was human just like everyone else and forgive myself in order to forgive others. What we see in others that we do not like is often what we have to work on in ourselves . I will say a prayer for you, Michelle that spiritually, physically and emotionally God will heal you. By being vulnerable and transparent you have taken a huge step to healing. I understand, believe me.

  59. Oh Michelle … you’re not alone! I feel like that very very often. I’ve been there, am often there! …. Praying for you this morning! Keep looking up…. and don’t compare you to anyone else!

  60. Maureen Chiasson says:

    I loved this video of throwing away our thoughts and getting with God’s Word. I have thrown away my confidence most of my life and allowed others or myself to define me. What a refreshing way to look at ourselves through the eyes of God. If we tell God, ourselves and others that we are not adequate then we ate calling God a liar. Loved chapter six and will be working on these concepts This is an awesome study. I am learning and growing a lot. God has spoken to me during this time.

  61. God has perfect timing, I have allowed the world and others to define me and bring the fear out of me to the point I just want to crawl in a hole and not come out.. I have let my confidence diminish without really knowing it happened. The verse that really hit me today was Dt 31:6 Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for The Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. I have been struggling with fear for some time, My husbands deployment seems to have brought up a lot of fears I thought I was getting past. Fear of feeling safe in this world is challenging but reminds me that My God is right beside me every step of the way, he will not leave me!! For with him I am Strong

  62. I absolutely love chapter 6 and your video message. I have been feeling hopeless and less confident. Your message and the scriptures really spoke to me. The great messages from the community are great and they let me know I’m not alone. Thank you so much.

  63. Loved the video, it really spoke to me as I have struggled with this most of my adult life. I am guilty of throwing away my confidence. But for those of you who still struggle with this with God’s help it does get better!! The Lord has brought me so far especially in the last 5 years or so. My husband and I stepped out on faith about 8 months ago (quitting two full time jobs – he to start his own business and I to become a stay at home/homeschooling mom) and I have to say my cup runneth over!! He has blessed us beyond anything that we could have imagined. All I can say is push on, fight past the doubt it may be very difficult and very scary but you will not regret it!!

  64. Amazing messages at both services at church today
    If I didn’t know better I’d at my pastors have been secretly
    reading A Confident Heart and doing this study.
    Feel very blessed how God has nicely tied up the whole issue of doubt
    for me tonight ending with prayer and freedom.
    Through my experiences tonight I believe we have to take the first step by making a conscious decision not to walk in doubt.
    Once we make that decision we have drawn a line in the sand not to cross. God is awesome. He loves us more than we can ever understand. He will meet us in that decision and set us free. But that decision is ours to make. A decision we may need to make daily for a while till it really gets into our head, heart and spirit. Thank you Jesus for what you’ve done for me tonight.

  65. carolyn rivers says:

    I have completed the book. I have even read the book two times and I admit that I have learn something different each time. I am proud to say that I can read this book again and again. I recommend that everyone read it two times in oder to get the full understanding of the power of god.


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    (Chapter 6) Don’t Throw Away Your Confidence | Renee Swope

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