Happy Monday! The winner of Micca’s book is Renee and Cullen!
Oh, I almost blew it on Friday. Well, I sorta did blow it but thank you Jesus, I caught my self just as it was happening and shut my mouth before I really blew it!
I was trying so hard to be a good mom and encourage one of my kids that’d had a hard day. Someone at school was being mean to him, using mean words to tear him down. It made me so mad. I know what it’s like to be hurt by mean words so it taps into a tender place when I see or hear about it happening to someone else – especially one of my kids!
I tried to counter the mean words with encouragement. I tapped into my Jr High cheerleading skills, pulled out my internal pom-poms and started doing cheers for him about how g-r-e-a-t he is and how God’s using him in so many ways and all that sappy mom stuff. He just wanted a brownie and for me to drop it. He faked a smile, said thanks and headed upstairs. Ten minutes later I heard that same child being really mean to his brother and using his words as a weapon. Something in me snapped and I started threatening to take away every bit of his brownie and his freedom if he didn’t apologize.
What happened to the nice and encouraging mom? She was still mad about the school incident and when she saw it happening in her own home, she blew it!
Later I realized I had become part of the whole cycle of one hurt person hurting another. It helped me realize that the child who is being mean to my kid is probably hurting inside so he’s striking out to hurt someone else. Then my kid gets hurt and he strikes out at home and hurts his brother. Then I get hurt and I strike out and the crazy circle continues.
I know, I am supposed to be more mature and all. Well, when I realized I had contributed to the cycle, we had a good talk and my hurt child realized and apologized for what he’d said and done. And so did I.
This morning it was time to go back to school after a break from the hard knocks of school life. God reminded me how much courage it would take for my kid to face the possibility of conflict again. Instead of letting the cycle continue I decided to start a circle instead. I replaced the cycle of criticism with a circle of encouragement. I know kinda cheesy but it worked. I encourage my kid with words God had given me this morning in Psalm 23. I asked him read it out loud on our way to school. He said he could feel how close God was and it gave him courage. As I dropped him off I asked him to look for ways use the gift of words to build someone up just as God was building him up. My prayer is that God will build a bridge to the heart of the kid who was mean and maybe my child can encourage him one day.
There are so many kids (and adults) who never reach their fullest potential and what often holds them back is a lack of courage. What often deters them is negative words from someone along the way. Jesus used words to give people courage. Through His words, He drew their eyes off of who they were and pointed them towards who they could become. As a mom, I want to be the all-important catalyst for my child to become all that God has designed him to be by believing in him and offering courage through my words. And when I blow it and jump on the cycle, I can apologize and start a new circle.