Soon after I poured out my dream as an offering to God in 2003, I asked Him if I’d ever write a book. I sensed God say ( an impression in my heart ) that I wouldn’t write a book until after I turned 40, and there would be a child.
I questioned if it was really God speaking. I was very content with 2 kids so I hoped I’d imagined that part. Every once in a while during the following years, I got lax with birth control just to see, but nothing ever happened. So I went on with life. Four years later, I turned 40. No child. No book.
During the in between time, I learned that when God calls us to lay something down, it’s usually because He has something else to give us. When God told me to lay down my dream of writing a book, He called me to pour my time and my heart into others’ dreams. I did so by investing in the P31 team, helping them become better speakers, leaders, and writers. It has been so sweet to watch many of their dreams come true and to see God use them in such powerful ways to change lives!
I also felt called to invest more of my time to serve alongside Lysa, LeAnn and many others to help P31 grow. In my personal ministry, He called me to dig deep into His Word and focus on my speaking messages instead of any new writing opportunities.
I see in a whole new way that when God calls us and we obey, He blesses abundantly. He grew my personal ministry more than ever, while I was focused on growing others. And all of it was part of what He was calling me to do then and what He was preparing me for next. Only GOD!
Beth Moore once said that, “We lay down our lives and the world’s call to receive something far more intense – God’s call. God intends the time we spend awaiting further enlightenment and fuller harvest to bulge with relationship.”
During the past five years God has been refining and bringing depth to my character and my relationships. These have been some of the hardest years in our marriage and in ministry. But it has been the richest seasons of intimacy and relationship with God, with my husband and with my friends.
Like cream in the middle of an Oreo cookie, there is always something so sweet about the in between!
Now here is the funny thing. I am now 41 and a half, and God called us last Fall to start the process of adoption, 9 months before He called me to start writing a book (see above post). I promise I did not make this up!