A very sad day…

Today was a very, very sad day. Beyond description. One of my best friends for almost 14-years – my sweet and precious daschund – Chelsea, died this afternoon. She was sick when we got home Sat night after I’d been speaking in TN. She seemed okay yesterday but got much worse this afternoon. By the time I got her to the vet she was gasping for her last breath. At first the Vet thought it was some kind of food poisoning or something because he couldn’t figure out what was wrong. But after she died and we talked more about changes we’ve seen over the past few months with her vision and hearing, the Vet thinks she may have had a brain tumor that we didn’t know about. Over the past two days it seems as though her brain, lungs and heart just started to shut down. It was the saddest thing I’ve ever been through.

 
She was my constant companion. My shadow and friend. She followed me everywhere when I was at home and even traveled with me in the car when the weather permitted. She sat by my side when I read my Bible in my favorite chair, layed under my feet when I sat at my computer desk, cuddled up close to my side when I sat on the couch to watch tv, write radio shows, blog, etc. For the past few weeks though, she spent most of her time in her doggy bed. I’d have to go get her to come sit with me.
I have sobbed all afternoon. I know I’ll be okay, but I miss her deeply and don’t know what my days will be like without her. I am so sad. My heart is heavy and I wish this hadn’t happened now during a time when I want to be happy and focused.
I know God’s timing is perfect and I know her death today is probably God’s protection from us losing her in our new home. This was her home for most of her life. I had been recently thinking about how stressful our move would be for Chelsea, since she was getting so old and doesn’t like change. I am telling myself all of this to help me let go. It’s not easy but focusing on what is true and on God’s faithfulness brings moments of comfort in the midst of my deep sadness and grief.
About Renee

Renee Swope is a Word-lover, story-teller, heart-encourager and grace-needer. She's also a wife, mom, friend, daughter and author of A Confident Heart, a Retailers Choice Award winning book that became a best-seller and has been published in six languages, with over 150,000 copies sold. Renee is speaks around the country at women's events and and serves on the writing team for DaySpring’s inCourage blog. For twenty years, Renee served in leadership at Proverbs 31 Ministries and as former co-host of the ministry's radio program, “Everyday Life with Lysa & Renee.

Comments

  1. Oh, Renee. I’m so very sorry that you lost your friend, Chelsea. I, too, have lost a very close and dear companion before…his name was Trouble. His name says it all, but he was so wonderful to me. He protected me. Slept in the same bad with me. Made every step I made. When I felt bad, he was there to keep me company and to ease my sickness. I sobbed until I couldn’t sob any more when I lost him. It’s so hard to lose someone you love. But you are right. It is in God’s perfect timing. We musn’t lose sight of that.

    I will be praying for you.
    Prayers and Blessings…
    Rebecca

  2. Ah Renee, I’m so sorry.
    Sometimes silences speak louder than words….
    Praying for you and sending a hug,
    Joy

  3. I am so, so, so sorry to hear your sad news. May you find joy and peace over the next few days as you lean on our Comforter.

  4. Rene,
    I wish I was there to hug you and wipe your tears. You are in my prayers my friend as you grieve the loss of your precious friend Chelsea.

    Love
    Cris

  5. Renee,

    Praying for you and your family. Pets are such a wonderful part of our lives. Hold onto your memories. And praise God as he saw fit to have her life end before your move. He is in charge of everything.

    Kim from PA

  6. Anonymous says:

    (((hug)))
    God bless you…
    C.J.

  7. Renee,
    So sorry to read of your loss. Praying for comfort for you and your family today.
    Paula

  8. prayers for everything.

    peace~elaine

  9. Awww,I am so sorry. It’s never fun to lose a friend.

    We just recently got our kids a puppy and for the first time in my life I am connecting with a pet…though it has taken time.

    I feel for you and I have said a prayer that God will comntinue to bring you comfort.

  10. Patti VZ says:

    Oh, Renee…
    Thank you for that post. I sit here with my mostly Chow friend of 15+ years. Penny Louise is getting SO old but such a good friend. I dread that day when we have to say goodbye – which I’m afraid will be sooner than either of us care to admit!

  11. Sweet Renee, I am sooooo sorry. I know that Chelsea was a member of your family and this is a very hard loss for all of you. I am praying that God will surround each of you with His peace and help carry you through the days ahead. Know how very much you are loved my friend.
    Wish I could give you a big hug!
    Love,
    LeAnn

  12. No wonder the Lord prompted me to pray for you this morning.

    I am so sorry. We will keep you covered friend!

    Love Wendy P.

  13. Renee – I am grieving and mourning your loss. We have shared some special moments concerning our furry friends and how their lives are the absolute epitome of devotion. I know God gives us our animals to teach us eternal lessons. Please know that I am praying for each of you. Tell Josh and Andrew that I am so very sorry. I know this comes at an already stressful time in your life and I am praying God’s gentle compassion would carry you through.

  14. Anonymous says:

    I am so sorry my sweet friend. I know that it is a tough week for you at an already very crazy time in your life. I will be praying for you,JJ and the boys.
    See you soon.
    Sweet Blessings,
    Margaret

  15. Hey Renee, Again my prayers are with you during your loss. May God strengthen you thru this hard time. God Bless and much love. Aimy

  16. Dear Renee,

    My heart goes out to you and the boys. I know that loosing Chelsea will leave a big hole in all of your hearts and lives. I’ve been down that road far more times than I even care to remember and it is so difficult. Especially during the first weeks after the loss. You will find yourself looking around for Chelsea and may even start to call out for her before you remember. It is such a bitter pill to swallow. My heart sobs with yours. Please know that my prayer is for God’s perfect peace and comfort to surround you and that you will feel the loving arms of the Savior carring you through the emotions of grief and loss.

    BIG HUGS,
    Joanie

  17. Oh Renee,
    I offer my condolences too. It has been years since we lost a dear pet, but I know the heartbreak of losing a sweet companion so close to you.
    I am so glad that you are focusing on God’s timing in all of this. That can be hard to hear, but He is sovereign and knkows the plans He has for you.
    Prayers for your comfort.

  18. Renee I am so sorry for your loss. I haven’t experienced that yet though I do know that one day we will with our cats. I’m glad you were able to get home in time and I really enjoyed your message at the retreat.

  19. Oh Renee! I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I know how hard it is to lose a pet – they are just like family. We had our dog for seventeen years, and it was so hard when she died. I do praise God though that you were able to be with Chelsea, and didn’t have to make the decision of whether or not to put her down. I pray that God will comfort you in a way that only He can. He knows your tears and sorrow. I pray you will be able to crawl up in your ‘Daddy’s lap’ and feel his comforting arms around you.

    I will be continuing to pray for you my friend.
    Prayers and blessings,
    Jodie

  20. So sorry Renee that your sweet Chelsea has died.

    I have never had a dog and my husband wants one REALLY bad and after reading your post, I am inclined to go along with him. He speaks of his childhood dog Chico, must like you do here.

    I pray that each day for you will get better and better …

  21. I’m praying for you. I know that is a very hard thing. I will keep praying for you.

    I had a dog for 6 months and for a variety of reasons, had to give her back. I still cry about her.

  22. Sorry about your doggie. I pray that you will be comforted in the days to come. We lost a good old dog that we’d had for several years last year. It was hard, especially on the girls. With time comes healing.
    Blessings~Alyce

  23. Renee;

    I always enjoy reading your blog because you give such great insight to those of us who read it. Now it is our turn to comfort you and give you hope.

    I lost my PC Kitty (PC stands for Partly Cloudy, she was grey!)5 months ago and I miss her terribly. She, too was at my feet, by my side, in my face, on top of reading and work materials whenever I was home. She was my constant companion and relocated with me five times in the 13 years we spent together. She was my family and just the best!

    I am truly sorry for your loss and pray for comfort. I still blow kisses to PC every morning as I leave for work. I know she is sitting in God’s lap (probably next to Chelsea!) giving Him lots of love.

    Be blessed today and find comfort in our Lord and Savior.

    Monica

  24. Anonymous says:

    I’m sorry to hear about your loss. I experienced this loss after having our lab for 10 years. He was an outside dog and I always referred to him as my husband’s dog or my kid’s dog and I really didn’t think I had such an attachment for him – until he was gone. I bet I cried everyday for two weeks each time I drove into the driveway and he wasn’t there. My only advice to you is to let yourself grieve and to experience this loss for what it is.

  25. I’m so sorry, Renee! Praying God wraps His arms around you super-tight these next few days (weeks, months).

  26. I understand how the heart gets connected to our pets. We have a diva dog who is aging and as you described your companionship with Chelsea it was like our home. Praying God’s comfort, I’m not looking forward to that day arriving in our home. Peace.

  27. ConnieH says:

    Hi Renee,

    I don’t know how much you go back to read comments on past posts, but I want you to know I know exactly what you are going through. This past Tuesday my family lost a family member of our own. Our dear sweet Lucky puppy had a stroke,became paralysed , and had neurological damage that couldn’t be repaired. My heart broke. My family cried, sobbed. I know what you are going through all too well. It helped us to make a colleage of pictures of our memories with her. I pray you find comfort in remember how dear she was to you, and how dear you were to her.

    Connie

  28. Renee, I am so sorry for your loss of Chelsea…I so totally understand how you feel…we had to put our almost 17 year old Australian cattle dog Sassy to sleep last year and it was the hardest thing I’ve ever done…they are such loving fur friends and a big part of a family…my prayers and comforting thoughts are with you and your family…
    Love,
    Kelly

  29. Oh Renee, I have been out of town and am just reading this post. I’m so sorry for your loss and will be praying that God will continue to comfort you.

    Love and Blessings,
    Dawn

  30. Renee,
    I just read this. I am so sorry. That is such a tough time. I remember losing my Sam…very awkard looking dog as his parents were a Afghan & Black Lab. He had the Afghan skinny body & one time an anonymous neighbor~we knew who she was~ left a note saying we needed to feed him. Years after I was out of the house, Sam died. The cool part was, he got out of the backyard somehow & went and died in the alley under a bush. Didn’t want to die where all of my good memories of him were I suppose.
    So neat how you adored your Chelsea…maybe her & Sammy have hooked up in Doggy Heaven. 🙂 Hope this made you smile.
    Love,
    Lelia

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